FabSwingers.com forum: Funny things said during sex

By *ornieandhot OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough

Was in bed with hubbie last night and he said " oh I love being inside you it's comfy"

Don't think he appreciated the half hour it took me to stop giggling though

Anyone else found something said really funny

D x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a one night thing with a guy once that said 'sit on my face and tell me you love me'. Of course I broke into monty python song and was crying with laughter (much to his dismay). He'd never seen monty python and couldn't understand why I found it so funny! Needless to say we didn't meet up again.....

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By *ornieandhot OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough

"Had a one night thing with a guy once that said 'sit on my face and tell me you love me'. Of course I broke into monty python song and was crying with laughter (much to his dismay). He'd never seen monty python and couldn't understand why I found it so funny! Needless to say we didn't meet up again..... "

Haha same sense of humour as me then

D x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This was just after a mind-blowing 2 hour sex session. Jay turns to Dee and says "Don't forget to defrost the mince for tomorrows dinner".

Not sure why it was so funny but we couldn't stop laughing for 10 minutes.

Must have been some sort of release lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was having very passionate sex with this girl and she said talk dirty to me . So I started talking dirty saying she loved my cock in her pussy etc and she was a dirty slut ! To which the young lady in question was really getting off on. And was saying it back like oh yes I love your cock in my pussy, fuck my pussy with your cock ! And I'm a dirty slut . So i said what are you I can't hear you. So she shouted it louder I'm a dirty slut, an I said louder to which she duly did. So we are both getting off on this naughty talk ! When I pitch in with . Wait for it, what would your mum say now if she could see you, you dirty bitch. God knows why and her reply ok I think your taking it a bit far now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once asked the ex if he wanted chicken or beef for sunday lunch...He was non to impressed

... i was multi tasking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

one man who was talking about his wife,

looked at my fanny and said, your cunts bigger than doreens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not strictly as per the thread but hope you enjoy..

One time I was with a woman and , in the midst of passion the TV had been left on in the background. We had our fun and after we both came I collapsed, sweaty and breathless on top of her. That beautiful moment of exhausted silence was broken suddenly with the high pitched squeals of the Tellytubbies

"Again, again!"

Took us about 30 minutes to stop laughing as we both creased up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I once asked the ex if he wanted chicken or beef for sunday lunch...He was non to impressed

... i was multi tasking"
I'd have taken that as a euphemism and asked for both!

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By *ornieandhot OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough

"Not strictly as per the thread but hope you enjoy..

"Again, again!"

Took us about 30 minutes to stop laughing as we both creased up!"

Haha that's a good one

D x

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By *ornieandhot OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough

We were once having a rather pleasurable session when a large piece of plaster coving came down off the ceiling narrowly missing me

As you can imagine it ruined the whole thing and we didn't sleep in that room again till the builders had been in and fixed it

Makes us laugh looking back at it now but really wasn't at time

D x

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

we had the camcorder on filming her getting fucked off this fella on the couch he was banging away when our parrot shouting "hurry up wheres the telly remote" the look on the fellas face

we er now cover the fucker up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"one man who was talking about his wife,

looked at my fanny and said, your cunts bigger than doreens.

lol!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did have the bed collapse mid-session one time and had to carry on on the floor...

Oh and then there was the time when I was having a fabulous time with the ex when we turned around only to find our new cat sitting there staring at us...talk about off-putting!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was having very passionate sex with this girl and she said talk dirty to me . So I started talking dirty saying she loved my cock in her pussy etc and she was a dirty slut ! To which the young lady in question was really getting off on. And was saying it back like oh yes I love your cock in my pussy, fuck my pussy with your cock ! And I'm a dirty slut . So i said what are you I can't hear you. So she shouted it louder I'm a dirty slut, an I said louder to which she duly did. So we are both getting off on this naughty talk ! When I pitch in with . Wait for it, what would your mum say now if she could see you, you dirty bitch. God knows why and her reply ok I think your taking it a bit far now

hahaha!! thats brilliant!

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By *loyd0910Man
over a year ago

Birmingham

I had a random one I was 17 me the girl I was seeing my mom n dad all went the local pub we all got well oiled up but mom was a bit worse for wear so we all went to bed took mom 45 mins to get upstairs so me and my girl waited about an hr before we got upto no good we was having a good time I had her up against the wardrobe n my dad opens the door and say "son can you keep it down please I'm trying to get it on with your mom but all she keeps doing is commenting on that you come from good stock to please her that well" needless to say the girl was to ashamed to carry on n I went to sleep with blue balls while mom n dad was rocking there worlds

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