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People's attitudes about swingers

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By *ittleMissCali OP   Woman
over a year ago

all loved up

I expect people outside of the lifestyle to have a few misconceptions etc

But recently got told by someone who had been a fwb that he was glad he had been tested while meeting me as at the start I'd still been meeting other people.

He then went on to tell me that he doesn't want to meet if ans when I'm swinging as swingers share stds around to one another all the time.

He will go back to hiring a lady for his needs... now I'm a little insulted by this attitude... but was shocked to find its a common attitude for some singles on here

I've been swinging for over 29 years now... and to this day.. have never caught anything.. I play safely except when in an established partnership.... and regardless I get checked every 6 to 12 weeks ( sometimes it's more frequent, depends how active I've been)

Not sure if I'm being delicate feeling insulted by this attitude that being a swinger makes me worse than If I was being paid for it.

To be fair I can't see the logic in refusing to meet someone that meets others on here.. but they will happily meet working girls... I've blocked them but the attitude really struck me as being awful for someone that is on here looking for meets.

Is it as common as I'm being led to suggest

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

Unfortunately, it is relatively common opinion that people who swing must be riddled by disease. I have had a few chats like that in the past - basically, how often do you get tested, what were the results, have you met anyone since your last test etc. Also, afterwards - "please let me know if anything comes up on your next test" (most annoying if we used a condom or only had fingering/hand job). I would say "working ladies" are more at risk? Or maybe someone caught themselves developing feelings and decided accusing you of being "unclean" was better than admitting to that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fact is, swingers are generally more aware of the risks of sti's & std's than most people. We have been on the scene 9 years with not one problem. We get checked regularly and are always safe.

Good luck with his drug addled street walker

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

I don’t follow the logic!

“I won’t have sex with you as you occasionally have sex with other people. But I will have sex with a woman who is getting it several times a week if not most days from a list of random men (who probably have sex with other sex workers, too!).”

Bizarre!

Gbat

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Cali, if you need some help in disposing of their remains, let me know

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Pretty standard thoughts for people on the outside.

See also, I can't really care for my partners if I sleep with other people.

See also, because I'm a masochist and happily enjoy certain things with my sadist I must hate myself and have no self respect, and he obviously hates women.

See also, must be like throwing a sausage up the M6 and riddled with disease.

It's water off a duck's back from strangers. Always stings a little coming from someone you thought was an actual person though.

Hope you're not feeling too off about it OP

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

Was recently at the doctors for an appointment, standard checkup at my age and explained that B and I are ethically non monogamous but test between 6 weeks and 3 months depending on what’s happening.

The doctor was very complimentary that most ENM or swingers are more aware of STI’s and the need for testing than many others.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire


"Was recently at the doctors for an appointment, standard checkup at my age and explained that B and I are ethically non monogamous but test between 6 weeks and 3 months depending on what’s happening.

The doctor was very complimentary that most ENM or swingers are more aware of STI’s and the need for testing than many others.

"

Why did you need to tell the doctor about your sex life?

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming


"Was recently at the doctors for an appointment, standard checkup at my age and explained that B and I are ethically non monogamous but test between 6 weeks and 3 months depending on what’s happening.

The doctor was very complimentary that most ENM or swingers are more aware of STI’s and the need for testing than many others.

Why did you need to tell the doctor about your sex life?"

Several reasons, but they’re between me and the doctor.

Disclosure of all facts makes their life easier.

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By *ittleMissCali OP   Woman
over a year ago

all loved up


"Was recently at the doctors for an appointment, standard checkup at my age and explained that B and I are ethically non monogamous but test between 6 weeks and 3 months depending on what’s happening.

The doctor was very complimentary that most ENM or swingers are more aware of STI’s and the need for testing than many others.

Why did you need to tell the doctor about your sex life?

Several reasons, but they’re between me and the doctor.

Disclosure of all facts makes their life easier. "

yeah my doctor and health notes say I'm a swinger x it's just better. That's why they offered me prep

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Even swingers have bad attitudes about other swingers.

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By *neforutoMan
over a year ago

Fantasy land in the SW

When I started swinging in my early 20's the social side was more pronounced and people were more polite. Now it seems that the opposite is true, Ive rarely spoken with someone on here who wants to chat about anything other than sex and they seem annoyed/scared off by the idea of 'getting to know you a bit better'.

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By *ittleMissCali OP   Woman
over a year ago

all loved up


"Even swingers have bad attitudes about other swingers.

"

Well some do.... but to hlbe told I'd put him at risk, ans he would go back to paying for sex. I found that quite insulting. Especially as my profile doesn't exactly scream little Miss Angel... and he knew I was a greedy girl

..

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)


"Even swingers have bad attitudes about other swingers.

"

And as demonstrated above many people have bad attitudes about sex workers.

As someone who has had a foot in both camps for many years (although now a very retired sex worker)...

There are many forums about sex work and *most* are heavily focused on safer sexual practices, encouraging clients to test regularly, only see swers who test and encourage safer sex practices. (I say most because there is a small subset of men who actively seek riskier practices).

I have and will constantly go on about safer practises and how there are large portions of the swinging community that aren't fully aware of the implications of such things.

The revelation of the fact you should have a penis hand and a vagina hand when playing with someone for example is something a lot of swingers don't think about...

The amount of men I've encountered in clubs who are wanking themselves then try to touch me... Hell no, not with that hand I've just seen smearing precum all over yourself.

Now I'm not bashing this but 5 minutes on the forum and you see more than a couple of posts where people are talking about taking more risks with their sexual practices than I personally would take, but that is their own choice done with their own informed consent.

But we can't deny it happens and I'm not surprised someone not in the swinging community could have a negative view of it.

If anything to me it just highlights that guys complete lack of understanding of basic sexual health or respect for body autonomy and as such I'd be majorly turned off.

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By *ittleMissCali OP   Woman
over a year ago

all loved up


"Even swingers have bad attitudes about other swinger demonstrated above many people have bad attitudes about sex workers.

As someone who has had a foot in both camps for many years (although now a very retired sex worker)...

There are many forums about sex work and *most* are heavily focused on safer sexual practices, encouraging clients to test regularly, only see swers who test and encourage safer sex practices. (I say most because there is a small subset of men who actively seek riskier practices).

I have and will constantly go on about safer practises and how there are large portions of the swinging community that aren't fully aware of the implications of such things.

The revelation of the fact you should have a penis hand and a vagina hand when playing with someone for example is something a lot of swingers don't think about...

The amount of men I've encountered in clubs who are wanking themselves then try to touch me... Hell no, not with that hand I've just seen smearing precum all over yourself.

Now I'm not bashing this but 5 minutes on the forum and you see more than a couple of posts where people are talking about taking more risks with their sexual practices than I personally would take, but that is their own choice done with their own informed consent.

But we can't deny it happens and I'm not surprised someone not in the swinging community could have a negative view of it.

If anything to me it just highlights that guys complete lack of understanding of basic sexual health or respect for body autonomy and as such I'd be majorly turned off. "

Oh absolutely.. I've had someone try to use the same toy on me that they have just used on someone else.

Like yourself I spent a good many years in both camps too...but ... he knew this... and was happy to meet me at the start and wasn't concerned. Yet suddenly I've got a bf ans I'm disgusting as we will be swinging together

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester


"Even swingers have bad attitudes about other swingers.

"

lol truth

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By *ittleMissCali OP   Woman
over a year ago

all loved up


"Cali, if you need some help in disposing of their remains, let me know "

Hahaha can always count on my real friends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why did you need to tell the doctor about your sex life?"

Because your health is more important than being embarressed perhaps?

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