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Promiscuous Girlfriend Thoughts

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By *goodlength OP   Man
over a year ago

near Trowbridge

A friend of mine has slept with a lot more people than I have (5 times as many). In a strange way, this turns me on and I have recently found myself thinking about her getting off with other men when we have sex.

Is this a common thought and, if so, do you think it is healthy?

Thanks

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"A friend of mine has slept with a lot more people than I have (5 times as many). In a strange way, this turns me on and I have recently found myself thinking about her getting off with other men when we have sex.

Is this a common thought and, if so, do you think it is healthy?

Thanks "

Is the thought causing you upset or pleasure? If it's pleasure then it's healthy.

Can't say if it's a common thing but we've met a lot of people who enjoy seeing their partners enjoying sex with someone else, it's part of the reason we're here for instance.

You've obviously discussed numbers of partners for you to be so specific in your comparison of how many each of you've had but just because your friend had had more partners than you won't mean she or he will be interested in more than one at the same time.

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By *goodlength OP   Man
over a year ago

near Trowbridge

Thanks nicecouple. It is both a turn on to think of her with others but also a little distressing once we have finished. She is stunning and to think of her being 'used' by other men (some of whom weren't particularly pleasant) can hurt.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Thanks nicecouple. It is both a turn on to think of her with others but also a little distressing once we have finished. She is stunning and to think of her being 'used' by other men (some of whom weren't particularly pleasant) can hurt. "

was she unwilling then? Your use of the term "used" implies that.

Thinking of your friend in these terms is possibly not as healthy as it could be.

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By *goodlength OP   Man
over a year ago

near Trowbridge

She was willing however it was very much an attention seeking thing following a few very unstable initial relationships. She has a very high sex drive however I find it difficult not to think of all the men she has been with.

Definitely something I need to stop.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"She was willing however it was very much an attention seeking thing following a few very unstable initial relationships. She has a very high sex drive however I find it difficult not to think of all the men she has been with.

Definitely something I need to stop. "

It is and you need to concentrate on the present with your friend not her past. The number of men she has had sex with is of no consequence, sex is not the same as commitment or love don't confuse them.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

also while I'm thinking about it, why do you choose to describe her as promiscuous? How many men does a woman have to have sex with to earn that title which I find a bit disrespectful?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im the same, but its definitely a big turn on in my case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are a couple and in love, then as previously said, it shouldn't matter about the past because that's where it is, in history, we all have that. If your hearts are with each other, then all the physical stuff we get upto as swingers is just physical lustful pleasure.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I have to ask if you meet with your friend or swing as a single guy and how you rationalise your thoughts towards your friend with your activities on here and what you say in your profile.

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By *goodlength OP   Man
over a year ago

near Trowbridge

Nicecouple, thank you. We swing together occasionally but also swing separately. We keep our swinging activities separate from our commitment to each other.

Complicated, yes but we make it work as we both enjoy the physical pleasure derived from here.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Nicecouple, thank you. We swing together occasionally but also swing separately. We keep our swinging activities separate from our commitment to each other.

Complicated, yes but we make it work as we both enjoy the physical pleasure derived from here. "

Well I think that if you're happy and she's happy then it's fine!

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By *lthomasMan
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I have the same thoughts / fantasies about my ex-wife with other men when we were together. It really turned Mel & was really what got me into swinging.

You need to have a line between love and sex.

Love is what you & your partner have, sex is the swinging side.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I have the same thoughts / fantasies about my ex-wife with other men when we were together. It really turned Mel & was really what got me into swinging.

You need to have a line between love and sex.

Love is what you & your partner have, sex is the swinging side."

Yep!

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By *lthomasMan
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I still see the ex, have a few drinks and end up in bed. After drinking she's open to suggestion and knows how much it turns me on to think about her with other men, I actually think it turns her on too as we always end have really good sex when she tells me about it. She'll never swing but we both enjoy what see talks about.

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