FabSwingers.com forum: Funniest responses

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no.

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By *eelslover300TV/TS
over a year ago

flitwick

I've had 2 almost identical ones from two different "straight men". Declined both their advances to then be called a "gay fagg**"... hmmm how do you even respond to that (other than use of a block button lol)

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

That I'm an idiot.

It was my loss.

Did I not know who they were?

Did I not know their standing in the community?

Did I not know they could end my fab journey?

All from different but well verified profiles after never speaking before they sent me lists of specific instructions that I had to follow before I could meet them. (They contacted me)

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By *lirtatious JadeWoman
over a year ago

Wakefield

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no. "

I’ve had a couple that spring to mind:

1. I’m obviously a fake married bitch because I refused a “u free now” message.

2. Fat girls should be grateful of any offer on here.

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

We don't reply is our polite way of declining people's interest. The funniest response from several profiles is they'll message again a month or two later. In some cases it's been going on for years and we've never replied once. Be aware that by replying to politely turn people down, sometimes sexy Ladies suddenly become F@t Sl*gs.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That I'm an idiot.

It was my loss.

Did I not know who they were?

Did I not know their standing in the community?

Did I not know they could end my fab journey?

All from different but well verified profiles after never speaking before they sent me lists of specific instructions that I had to follow before I could meet them. (They contacted me)"

That’s crazy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We don't reply is our polite way of declining people's interest. The funniest response from several profiles is they'll message again a month or two later. In some cases it's been going on for years and we've never replied once. Be aware that by replying to politely turn people down, sometimes sexy Ladies suddenly become F@t Sl*gs."

And we are guessing pretty much the same copy and paste message each time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That I must be ugly, fat, gross... You know, the usual spiffle

Bless them

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By *ongandharderMan
over a year ago

Rotherham

No problem

But yeah if you were gay/bi I'd

(Insert sexual act here for what they would do )

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No problem

But yeah if you were gay/bi I'd

(Insert sexual act here for what they would do )

Teapot?

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

I usually got some form of “Your loss”, especially after some time has passed and I haven’t responded.

Umm no honey, I don’t think so.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" I usually got some form of “Your loss”, especially after some time has passed and I haven’t responded.

Umm no honey, I don’t think so. "

Haha yeah we’ve had this one too

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By *ongandharderMan
over a year ago

Rotherham

[Removed by poster at 09/11/23 10:47:03]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No problem

But yeah if you were gay/bi I'd

(Insert sexual act here for what they would do )

Teapot?

I couldn't remember the exact words

get lubed up and let you destroy my arse hole with you thick cock

Or suck you dry as you shove your dick deep in my throat "

So graphic

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By *ongandharderMan
over a year ago

Rotherham

"No problem

But yeah if you were gay/bi I'd

(Insert sexual act here for what they would do )

Teapot?

I couldn't remember the exact words

get lubed up and let you destroy my arse hole with you thick cock

Or suck you dry as you shove your dick deep in my throat

So graphic "

Yeah I couldn't help but laugh as I had already declined so they went for a sexual final attempt comment

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no. "

What's very funny is someone who has looked at your pics and said they are picky.... Great pics of you both... Love the fact you try to be courteous and reply though. Kudos.

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By *dinburghWomanWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

One verification I got was that I wasn’t a nice woman, my pictures weren’t up to date and I looked much older than my age,. As if I was going to let that show on my profile and the reason I don’t meet people I’m not initially attracted to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I turned someone down his reply (before he blocked me)

Well you're old and ugly anyway I'm surprised anyone would want to meet you

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By *abrielle43Woman
over a year ago

Kildare

No titted disproportional cum slut saggy looking yoke

Ok pal, you messaged me first

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By *abrielle43Woman
over a year ago

Kildare

You're just like the rest of them on here, full of shit and looking to see if you can catch the neighbours out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm too fat for them anyway.

But if I change my mind about a meet, to let them know

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By *eliusMan
over a year ago

Henlow

You may laugh at the responses, which is good as they shouldn’t be treated seriously but I wouldn’t call them funny.

When I saw the thread title I thought it meant ‘funny’ as in comedic laugh out loud. These are just childish playground tantrums.

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By *ust want fun 888Man
over a year ago

nearby

To be honest, very little replies

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No titted disproportional cum slut saggy looking yoke

Ok pal, you messaged me first"

And how wrong they where.

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By *ubwife4uCouple
over a year ago

Kent

That Mrs should be "Put Down"! She actually got quite upset with this, being the sensitive soul she is.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You may laugh at the responses, which is good as they shouldn’t be treated seriously but I wouldn’t call them funny.

When I saw the thread title I thought it meant ‘funny’ as in comedic laugh out loud. These are just childish playground tantrums."

Tantrums indeed but we do try and make light of them. In a toys out of the pram way.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Keyboard warriors... Progress at its most well disguised.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Keyboard warriors... Progress at its most well disguised. "

The evolution of humankind

Only the kind seems to be forgotten.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That Mrs should be "Put Down"! She actually got quite upset with this, being the sensitive soul she is. "

That is abhorrent.

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By *lasgowMassageMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Funniest thing I've had was on fabguys but not about a meet

I asked if any guys had tried e-stim and was it any good and worth trying

I woke up the next day to a very strange message about how I shouldn't be asking about e-stim on the forums

How would I like it if e-stim was asking about me on the forums, asking guys their opinion on me

I politely told them that e-stim was a sex toy and not a person

Few hours later another message telling me how I was rude and out of order discussing someone's private life on a public forum and I had now been reported to admin for it

Again I sent another polite messaging explaining in great detail the difference between a sextoy and a living person...I made it pretty much idiot proof as I had by now worked out I was talking to one

I then received a barrage of abuse from them and a warning from admin about my behaviour

Still makes me smile thinking about it

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By *lirtatious JadeWoman
over a year ago

Wakefield

"That Mrs should be "Put Down"! She actually got quite upset with this, being the sensitive soul she is.

That is abhorrent."

Completely agree, I sincerely hope the user was reported

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By *ubwife4uCouple
over a year ago

Kent

"That Mrs should be "Put Down"! She actually got quite upset with this, being the sensitive soul she is.

That is abhorrent.

Completely agree, I sincerely hope the user was reported"

Indeed, and then Blocked. Quite hurtful and knocked her confidence for a while. We laugh about it now though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That Mrs should be "Put Down"! She actually got quite upset with this, being the sensitive soul she is.

That is abhorrent.

Completely agree, I sincerely hope the user was reported

Indeed, and then Blocked. Quite hurtful and knocked her confidence for a while. We laugh about it now though. "

Good you’ve moved on but that should never be acceptable.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"Funniest thing I've had was on fabguys but not about a meet

I asked if any guys had tried e-stim and was it any good and worth trying

I woke up the next day to a very strange message about how I shouldn't be asking about e-stim on the forums

How would I like it if e-stim was asking about me on the forums, asking guys their opinion on me

I politely told them that e-stim was a sex toy and not a person

Few hours later another message telling me how I was rude and out of order discussing someone's private life on a public forum and I had now been reported to admin for it

I then received a barrage of abuse from them and a warning from admin about my behaviour

Still makes me smile thinking about it

More importantly... How was estim when you tried "him".?

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By *lasgowMassageMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Funniest thing I've had was on fabguys but not about a meet

I asked if any guys had tried e-stim and was it any good and worth trying

I woke up the next day to a very strange message about how I shouldn't be asking about e-stim on the forums

How would I like it if e-stim was asking about me on the forums, asking guys their opinion on me

I politely told them that e-stim was a sex toy and not a person

Few hours later another message telling me how I was rude and out of order discussing someone's private life on a public forum and I had now been reported to admin for it

I then received a barrage of abuse from them and a warning from admin about my behaviour

Still makes me smile thinking about it

More importantly... How was estim when you tried "him".? "

Never got to try it unfortunately

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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago

Baughurst

"I've had 2 almost identical ones from two different "straight men". Declined both their advances to then be called a "gay fagg**"... hmmm how do you even respond to that (other than use of a block button lol) "

Words we'd never use, but you might respond "How pitiful for you then to be the reject of a gay... ". Childish, I know, but in the moment it might leave you with the last word

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By *amnaughtybutniceWoman
over a year ago

tf1

Normally some lovely reference to my age and how I must be ugly and how dare I turn them down.

My favourite was you’re 47 love you can’t afford to be fussy.

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By *heelerMan
over a year ago

Northants

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no.

I’ve had a couple that spring to mind:

1. I’m obviously a fake married bitch because I refused a “u free now” message.

2. Fat girls should be grateful of any offer on here.

Hoped you blocked them these are the type of guys who ruin it for us respectable ones.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no.

I’ve had a couple that spring to mind:

1. I’m obviously a fake married bitch because I refused a “u free now” message.

2. Fat girls should be grateful of any offer on here.

Ooh did you go back with...

"yes I am that desperate which is why I can only imagine how shit that must make you if I'm saying no to you"

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By *eally_RosieWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

That because in the 5 seconds from being ‘the hottest thing they’ve seen’ to me rejecting them, they’ve miraculously and suddenly discovered me on other platforms and ‘dodged a bullet.’ Happens at least once a day.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That because in the 5 seconds from being ‘the hottest thing they’ve seen’ to me rejecting them, they’ve miraculously and suddenly discovered me on other platforms and ‘dodged a bullet.’ Happens at least once a day."

Proves their fickleness if nothing else

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Normally some lovely reference to my age and how I must be ugly and how dare I turn them down.

My favourite was you’re 47 love you can’t afford to be fussy. "

Yeah the whole beggars can’t be choosers narrative, what happened to grace and manners and just accepting no means no.

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By *eally_RosieWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Normally some lovely reference to my age and how I must be ugly and how dare I turn them down.

My favourite was you’re 47 love you can’t afford to be fussy.

Yeah the whole beggars can’t be choosers narrative, what happened to grace and manners and just accepting no means no. "

Absolutely. People who don’t understand the basic principle that I’m married and do this to enhance, not replace my sex-life, aren’t worth a second thought x

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Years ago a bloke called me frigid cos i said no to him,he obviously preferred to think that than the alternative

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By *lirtatious JadeWoman
over a year ago

Wakefield

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no.

I’ve had a couple that spring to mind:

1. I’m obviously a fake married bitch because I refused a “u free now” message.

2. Fat girls should be grateful of any offer on here.

Ooh did you go back with...

"yes I am that desperate which is why I can only imagine how shit that must make you if I'm saying no to you" "

I asked them if they were having a bad day and used that ever do useful block button!

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By *lirtatious JadeWoman
over a year ago

Wakefield

"What’s the funniest response you’ve got from politely declining someone’s advances.

We try and be courteous if someone messages that we are not interested in but often the reply we get to that is amusing.

A recent fav is being told that they are picky anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to meet us anyways haha funny how that occurred after they were told no.

I’ve had a couple that spring to mind:

1. I’m obviously a fake married bitch because I refused a “u free now” message.

2. Fat girls should be grateful of any offer on here.

Hoped you blocked them these are the type of guys who ruin it for us respectable ones."

I did use the block button

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I think I've only ever had polite responses!

Maybe that my beard was not their thing? I've clearly been very lucky!

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