FabSwingers.com forum: Why are some so rude/ill mannered on here?

By *zBoy123 OP Man
over a year ago

London.

As a rule of thumb, I have experienced that if people are interested in you they are pleasant & polite. And if they're not interested they can be downright rude, curt and arrogant. It costs NOTHING to be polite, if you're not interested why not just say so pleasantly, no need to be nasty & aggressive with it.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Sorry you've experienced bad messages unfortunately it's part of fab.

I've stopped replying to people we aren't interested in due to the backlash, it's sad people feel the need to be rude to others.

Mrs

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I've tried the polite approach and it doesn't work!!!

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I usually give the people I'm not interested a polite "No thanks."

The amount of times I get told I'm rude or straight insults or trying to convince me they'll change my mind is unreal.

I have a lot of patience. I thoroughly understand most people just not inviting that shit by replying politely at all.

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By *Spicey4MeMan
over a year ago

Leeds

"I usually give the people I'm not interested a polite "No thanks."

The amount of times I get told I'm rude or straight insults or trying to convince me they'll change my mind is unreal.

I have a lot of patience. I thoroughly understand most people just not inviting that shit by replying politely at all."

WTF what are people like. I suppose it's so easy to hide and be an idiot in this digital age.

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By *t0600Man
over a year ago

elvedon

"As a rule of thumb, I have experienced that if people are interested in you they are pleasant & polite. And if they're not interested they can be downright rude, curt and arrogant. It costs NOTHING to be polite, if you're not interested why not just say so pleasantly, no need to be nasty & aggressive with it."

Totally agree with this I’ve also come across some rude people here I’m always polite as a rule . I met a lot more pleasant than rude though which is a positive . If people are rude that’s their issue not yours

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By *zBoy123 OP Man
over a year ago

London.

Yes, I suspect the rude people have issues and are just not very nice underneath their veneer. If you're normal, well balanced and cheerful it is very easy to be consistently polite.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its just fab, there are alot of fakes, alot of distrust, and so so many copy past messages to answer.

You try to be you, do your thing, read profiles and keep going

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By *4funXXXMan
over a year ago

cheshire

I think it’s a sad part of life people just don’t have any respect and manners any more. Don’t get me wrong there are those who are nice and polite but not many sadly. I’ve had a few be really quiet horrible. I don’t lower my self to them. Hope you don’t get it to offend and can enjoy being on here

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By *ungle_kingMan
over a year ago

Nuneaton

Swings and roundabouts, I’ve had very polite thanks but no thanks messages and then you get the ones who just block you. As others have said it’s the way this site just works unfortunately but on the other hand a polite thanks but no thanks can be replied back with insults etc. some people don’t like rejection but they need to give their head a wobble and realise what this site is about. Their needs to be an attraction/connection and that also works both ways so it’s just people with dented prides just being morons that have made some give harsher replies back than they probably mean too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one is ever rude to me, they either don’t reply or block me. Very strange. Lol.

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By *ohnboy64Man
over a year ago

Blackpool

I've yet to have a rude reply. Wouldn't bother me in the slightest if I had. Childish behaviour from idiots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frustration..!

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By *heekyDemandCouple
over a year ago

Leicester

Fab has 2 things going against it that intrinsically attracts arseholes

1. It's on the Internet

2. It has people

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth

We're only rude if people are behaving like idiots to begin with

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By *randMrsLPCouple
over a year ago

london

Two wrongs never make a right. Therefore with the rude lot and we get quiet a few, just block them and don't show them they have managed to wind you up as that is how they get their kicks.

So use the block function.

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By *winging_couple300Couple
over a year ago

Doncaster

We haven’t really experienced any rude individuals, a polite thanks but no thanks is usually sufficient and we would just block anyone that becomes rude or aggressive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes you have to match people’s energy. If they’re polite then it’s fine to also do so.. but some pushy people who can’t take no for an answer need telling to do one.

Some couples on here have had so much shit from emotionally immature men it’s just a natural defence. Don’t take it personally, even if they are rude be polite back because that shows your character… you’ll be surprised how many people come back if prove you’re not an asshole

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By *otty BikerMan
over a year ago

Warrington

Gotta agree with OP there are some seriously bad mannered people on here, particularly towards single guys, but sadly yeah it's part of Fab life just gotta let it wash over !

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

I always speak politely in messages if I'm not interested I'll say so in a nice manner

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth

"Sometimes you have to match people’s energy. If they’re polite then it’s fine to also do so.. but some pushy people who can’t take no for an answer need telling to do one.

Came here to essentially say this in response to another comment....not really interested in some perceived moral high ground, if we feel like defending ourselves we bloody will!

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By *randMrsLPCouple
over a year ago

london

2nd post on this thread

The rude/nast/etc, bless in a way. As I said earlier, at least u find out before meeting them

Worryingly, some of these types have several glowing reviews and this is why asking questions, many if you want especially if u r a couple, single lady as often those that fly of the handle quickly will display this in the tone of their posts and that is not necessarly rude or nasty but many hints of them being ticked off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people in general are getting worse. As a bus driver I find many people just rude and arrogant and ignorant. Manners cost nothing and it really is nice to be nice and can change someone's day. Before you all bully me I'm not your typical miserable bus drivers actually acknowledge people and say hi and bye to all.

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By *imixedkinkcplCouple
over a year ago

Reading

Exactly that!

They don’t take no for an answer.

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By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

It depends what you class as rude

Rude seems to be an umbrella term on fab

Kinda need your personal definition to figure what you’re claiming as rude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never experienced any rude messages but maybe that's because I take no reply as meaning they're not interested and so leave them alone.

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By *ungBlackTopMan
over a year ago

salford

"I've tried the polite approach and it doesn't work!!! "

Me too. And it's always "straight" men and the odd TV that don't like rejection even if it's a polite no. So now I just ignore which to me is worse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not interested is my signature.. Polite all the time normally followed by a block so back lash.

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By *omblingFreeCouple
over a year ago

The Village

Fab is no different to many other parts of the internet in the sense people will type things they would never say aloud in any other environment for fear of an angry swipe in their direction. Calling it out maybe helps to stamp it out...

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By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Our initial response will be polite, unless their first message lacks a basic level of respect (its amazing what some people think is appropriate in an initial message).

If our polite refusal is followed up with further messages, or persistence, then our messages will be increasingly sarcastic.

Then, it will depend on mood as to whether I kick off, or just block.

In short, people don't get rude messages off of us unless they deserve it

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By *1nkseekersCouple
over a year ago

Bridgwater

"We're only rude if people are behaving like idiots to begin with "

Pretty much this. Blatantly haven't read the profile or crude out the gate we tend to be rude/sarcastic/block as the mood takes us

there is a warning to that end in the profile.

Other than that we are lovely (honest)

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By *aneyyMan
over a year ago

leeds

Personally my experience has been generally good on here!! But for women it’s 100% over inflated ego + men being disgusting/ disrespectful. For men it’s constant rejection and frustration because of it.. causing them to lash out

I’m basically sold on these two facts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always try to be polite, even if rejected. I thank them for their time and for replying.

I dont get why people are so rude. This isn't a free sex site

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By *esmond and Molly JonesCouple
over a year ago

Watford

It's anonymity. Pure and simple. some people on social media act like bastards knowing that they can say what they like without real world consequences. They seem to get some sort of kick from it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to reply to every message that I received, which can often feel a full time job.

And often resulted in some guy's trying to reason with you, or simply being rude.

This profile clearly states that whilst I appreciate all messages, I simply cannot respond and a simple delete says that I'm not interested.

Anyone that actually reads my profile will see that....but occasionally I still get the ones that simply cannot accept a delete. It end's up me having to block.

Now without sounding patronising, I am fully aware of how difficult it can be for the good guy's to stand out, but equally women are damned either way whether they reply or not.

My understanding was a delete meant thank you but no thank you.

There is however no excuse for rudeness or nasty comments from either sex.

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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago

Baughurst

My understanding was a delete meant thank you but no thank you."

Not just your understanding, it is there in the site guidance (FAQs) although spelt more like "No reply should be taken as a thanks but no thanks".

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By *mtasticCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

"Our initial response will be polite, unless their first message lacks a basic level of respect (its amazing what some people think is appropriate in an initial message)"

Absolutely this - I suspect some people class us as rude, but in our world the response is perfectly matched to the message. It's also incredible how you can politely decline and get a horrific response back, especially on the single profile

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By *egs 11Woman
over a year ago

BIDEFORD

"I've tried the polite approach and it doesn't work!!! "

You ignore them or send polite no thanks get bombarded. Some men bring it on themselves.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I used to reply to all messages, even those who had previously had a no thank you who I'd forgotten to block.

Now I sometimes ignore those ones, and a few others, and block them.

I'm too old and tired to be nice to people who I don't think deserves it.

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