FabSwingers.com forum: Fab couples cheating

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTable OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Ok so I don't get it, what makes one half of a fab couple cheat, I mean there hear together, they meet together, what is it that makes one half slip away and still feel the need to cheat?

For me being on fab obviously takes trust and a lot of communication, we are open & honest about what we want, I definitely wouldn't feel the need to sneak about but why do some when they have it all anyway?

Genuine question and very curious to know the replies.

Just to note I'm asking about couples already on fab where 1 half is out seeking others.

Mrs

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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago

Baughurst

Simple. Not all couples here have the trust and communication we have or that you OP share with your partner, and are here perhaps to save a dysfunctional relation thinking that sex is what is missing, when in reality it's the partnership that is gone for good.

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By *cottish guy 555Man
over a year ago

London

I was talking about this only yesterday. It's something that I can't quite understand. You're in a swinging relationship, your partner is happy for you to see others, all you have to do is tell them. And yet I have known so many couples where the guy just has to do it behind their partner's back. Very peculiar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think there’s just one answer.

Either the cheater is a thrill seeker.

The “cheater” isn’t cheating and both parties are playing out a role.

The rock solid couple presented on-line isn’t and the cheater is unhappy.

There are so many things go on behind closed doors that nobody knows about.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

I dont know the answer other than my opinion is they aren't true swingers. We hear a lot about single guys joining fab just for sex but maybe some couples, or one half of the couple see joining a site like these as a means to get easy sex and when they discover it isn't that easy they cheat. I would also guess, in that situation one of thecouple was already cheating before they got here.

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By *omtom7Man
over a year ago

Tralee

Yeah, it's for the thrill I think. Also some couples are led by one party more than the other. I've known a few where it's fairly obvious the one is only doing it to keep the other happy..

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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago

Baughurst

"I don’t think there’s just one answer.

Either the cheater is a thrill seeker.

The “cheater” isn’t cheating and both parties are playing out a role.

The rock solid couple presented on-line isn’t and the cheater is unhappy.

There are so many things go on behind closed doors that nobody knows about.

Good reply. Had not thought about your first two reasons, which are perfectly plausible.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTable OP Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Thanks for the replies some interesting responses.

Mrs

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By *iscreet gent2018Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I think it’s possibly for an ego/power thing. Maybe they think that if someone will meet them as an individual, outside their ‘usual’ couple scenario, then they will get a huge ego boost. To them they may feel like they are extra attractive or have extra sex appeal because someone wants to meet them and only them. Maybe I’m wrong, but it’s how I see it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah, it's for the thrill I think. Also some couples are led by one party more than the other. I've known a few where it's fairly obvious the one is only doing it to keep the other happy.."

I agree with this.

I also see it as ego. A man needing to prove he's still got it! At times especially in club/party scenarios its like a kid in a candy store! Selfishly behaving like they want to be single, but still have the missus to go home with to validate them!

Sorry its touched a nerve, I recognise its not just men who behave this way!

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By *aughtystaffs60Couple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

Libido's get out of synch over time. One half gets bored of the scene or libido diminishes with age while the other doesn't. That would be my guess. I see it a lot chatting to others.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I'm surprised you're surprised by it

Fab couples aren't a special species

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it’s possibly for an ego/power thing. Maybe they think that if someone will meet them as an individual, outside their ‘usual’ couple scenario, then they will get a huge ego boost. To them they may feel like they are extra attractive or have extra sex appeal because someone wants to meet them and only them. Maybe I’m wrong, but it’s how I see it. "
You’re not wrong

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By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

"I was talking about this only yesterday. It's something that I can't quite understand. You're in a swinging relationship, your partner is happy for you to see others, all you have to do is tell them. And yet I have known so many couples where the guy just has to do it behind their partner's back. Very peculiar

"
if you tell...you don't get buzz out of it...simples...its the buzz and excitement that's needed.if you gonna go and shag someone it's just nor gonna do it for you.

lots of partners cheating not coz they need sex or something is missing in their sex

..its just that buzz...that you shouldn't

well...that's how I see that.

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By *ustincamebridgeCouple
over a year ago

manchester

Male answer

My first marriage: I cheated, she cheated. We never had sex with others as a couple.

Me and Cammy: I now know what love is. I would never have a sexual experience with a third person without Cammy.

I think the reason partners cheat is they do not have a true emotional bond with each other. Sharing each other with others does not effect that bond. I am totally invested in our relationship. We have been together over 20 years and sex is still great and often gets better, it’s the emotional side that maintains the deep feeling and love that offers the bond. Cheating would destroy that.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

For some the thrill of cheating is the attraction of it. Knowing they have permission takes the gloss off the gingerbread. Feeling they have one over on their hapless partner gives them a thrill. In short they consider their needs outweigh their partners

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By *aughtystaffs60Couple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

"Male answer

My first marriage: I cheated, she cheated. We never had sex with others as a couple.

Me and Cammy: I now know what love is. I would never have a sexual experience with a third person without Cammy.

This just about hits nail on head for me. The only caveat is my previous comment about Libido diminishing one half. It is tough as once you have tasted the forbidden fruit it is hard to turn back on it forever. I think you just have to become very patient and understanding if your partner loses their lust for naughtiness and accept that you lived the dream for a while but it's time to hang up those high heels LOL.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

A lot of people who cheat on partners they don't want to leave do it due to low self esteem too.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

I think some people are just wired to cheat,ie they'll cheat no matter how good they have it ,even though they have permission to play solo.

It could be they like the thrill or the secrecy behind it.

I don't get it either ,but I know it happens from reading posts where one partner has found the other has a secret profile.

Miss

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"Ok so I don't get it, what makes one half of a fab couple cheat, I mean there hear together, they meet together, what is it that makes one half slip away and still feel the need to cheat?

Genuine question and very curious to know the replies.

Just to note I'm asking about couples already on fab where 1 half is out seeking others.

Mrs "

For a lot of couples on here it's the Man that's more into swinging than the Woman. Some Women are not into it at all but go along with it, they're on Fab for the wrong reasons. Most local updates have status's from couples profiles saying the Male is free to meet, chances are nearly all of their partners know nothing about them trying to cheat. Ultimately so many couples become single Male profiles and it's sad. Maybe their sex life isn't great is the reason they're here and then they go looking solo

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By *inkedKuntsCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Sadly must be too often, a status from, I'm guessing the M of a couple, posting about his wife/gf cheating popped up on our feed a few mins ago

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By *ustus555Couple
over a year ago

We treat swinging as a fun alternative, ie what we want, when we want & how we want.

We're open and honest with each other. The question will be asked, " fancy some extra fun" by either of us. If the answer is a negative then that's how it stays.

Really can't understand how or why either part of a cpl would feel the need to cheat.

Or am I being nieve??

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

[Removed by poster at 11/08/23 16:02:36]

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

"Ok so I don't get it, what makes one half of a fab couple cheat, I mean there hear together, they meet together, what is it that makes one half slip away and still feel the need to cheat?

Genuine question and very curious to know the replies.

Just to note I'm asking about couples already on fab where 1 half is out seeking others.

Mrs "

Our foundation was rock solid which it has to be for a cpl to become swingers. If you come here with a rocky relationship hoping sexual liberation with fix it you are very much mistaken. Swingers need to have trust, honestly,loyalty and very open communication to make it work. Those who think sex will fix their relationship will usually split up after attempting swinging as one of them will get jealous of seeing their partner having sex with another person or feeling left out. After our first play with a bisexual guy we were on a high for days after as watching her being fucked by him was simply awesome and she thought the same watching me and him play. Our guest cpls meet did kot hi to well due to the ladies partner was hammered and he caused a big row watching her play with us but it was fine him fucking Joanne though . This lifestyle has it's ups and downs meets wise but coming in to it without a solid relationship foundations is not a good starting point at all for anybody.

John

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

It happens more often that you’d think… it is all I will say.

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By *he Silver FuxMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"Ok so I don't get it, what makes one half of a fab couple cheat, I mean there hear together, they meet together, what is it that makes one half slip away and still feel the need to cheat?

Genuine question and very curious to know the replies.

Just to note I'm asking about couples already on fab where 1 half is out seeking others.

Mrs "

Are you referring to single profiles that the pair in the couple profile don’t know about? Many couples have separate single profiles … but swinger couples cheat for many of the same reasons as vanilla couples…

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By *andC1000Couple
over a year ago

Ashford

"I think some people are just wired to cheat,ie they'll cheat no matter how good they have it ,even though they have permission to play solo.

It could be they like the thrill or the secrecy behind it.

I don't get it either ,but I know it happens from reading posts where one partner has found the other has a secret profile.

Miss

Exactly this sadly and they don’t care about the mental or health consequences involved. Unless honest with themselves they’ll never be honest to partners but of course it’s never they’re fault and will always deny it and carry on even when caught

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