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The first move

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By *ander_X OP   Man
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

Thinking back through the people I've met from this site, not one of them came from me making the first contact. All of them either winked at or messaged me first.

I've never sent many unsolicited messages (I don't tend to at all now) and I've had a reasonably high proportion of positive replies to the ones I have, but if I've made the first move it never seems to go anywhere.

Have other men found the same? And, for the girls and couples; do you generally feel more comfortable if you've made the first move?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont ever make first contact. I could wink at you if you like but your bit far away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always made first contact. However, one of them I messaged, it got read and deleted so I figured they weren't interested and moved on.

I then got a random wink a couple of weeks later so messaged again and all went well. People are weird. Depends how much interest at the time.

This also made me realise that read+delete doesn't neccessarily mean "not interested" but moreso "busy at the moment".

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By *ete BarnesMan
over a year ago

maidstone

When you are an old married sod like me then it's always me that makes the first move. In the two years or so that I have been on Fab, I must hve received maybe 3 unsolicited messages and I think two of those were guys!

Going to cry now! aaaaah

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By *ander_X OP   Man
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

I'd come to the conclusion that there's some sort of psychological barrier of inherent suspicion that comes crashing down when men make the first contact. Maybe I just hadn't been sending messages to the right people

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I like to make contact with people, even if its just to say I like their pics or their profile.

Tend to get chatting and sometimes lucky to meet up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks

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By *ander_X OP   Man
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

Do you know how many hundreds of messages women on this site get? If they replied to every one, even just to say no thanks, they'd have no time to do anything else.

I'd prefer them to have time to use that time in better ways

Anyway, that wasn't the topic of this thread, and has been discussed to death already.

I usually get replys to my messages, they just never end up going anywhere. Whereas I've met quite a few people who've contacted me first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you know how many hundreds of messages women on this site get? If they replied to every one, even just to say no thanks, they'd have no time to do anything else.

I'd prefer them to have time to use that time in better ways

Anyway, that wasn't the topic of this thread, and has been discussed to death already.

I usually get replys to my messages, they just never end up going anywhere. Whereas I've met quite a few people who've contacted me first."

I think if a woman does make the first move they really are interested

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I'm sorry I looked at your pics and forgot the question...

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By *uschmanMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

Chances of Success if single man

Message from you - 1

Message to you - 100

Just my view

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Oh right I remember now, I've met men that initiated and also I've initiated with people I intend to meet, not sure it's who makes the first move but the way the first move is made lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

pretty much 50/50

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I nedver make the first move, im just not a very confident person and id hate to mail someone who has no interest in me, i always wait for guys to mail me first that way i know they like me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry I looked at your pics and forgot the question... "

lol yeah i had to re read the opening post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind making the first move...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rare I/we make the first move, I might wink, but only on when I am feeling mischievous.

That normally ends up in a message and go from there!

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By *igerstyle2k2Man
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

I've made the first move on here but not got anywhere. Sent messages with no replies or whatever, just move on and see who else is out there.

As for people messaging me, it doesn't happen unless it's a bi guy who wants to suck my cock. I'm straight by the way! So thanks but no thanks.

I think it depends where you are in the country, a lot of people only seem to want to swing locally.

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By *ohohoWoman
over a year ago

Up North

First of all

Wow - nice pics.

I wink or message guys I like the look of and have had some of my best meets as well x

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By *harliesteveCouple
over a year ago

selly oak


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks"
ur not alone there manors cost nothing

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks"

Nor is it difficult to accept a no thanks as a no thanks but sadly a lot don't which is why people just delete.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks ur not alone there manors cost nothing"

It's not bad manners not to reply. It's even in the fab FAQ that you shouldn't expect a reply and just take a not reply as a no. Some people don't accept a polite no thanks and get nasty or trying to change you mind. That's bad manners.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks ur not alone there manors cost nothing"

some people dont send a message worthy of a reply tho

ive had some messages and ive looked at the pics and they have looked quite nice actually but their message has been so stupid ive looked at it and thought.....what the hell do i say to that? so i dont bother

i had a message about a hour ago that just said

free for a fuck?

and you say i should reply to that out of respect?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks ur not alone there manors cost nothing"

it doesn't take 30 seconds to check out age limits, prefrences ect....people still don't bother, if they don't have the time to read our profile, i don't have the time to reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Works both ways for me. Some contact me, some I contact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people should reply purely out of respect isn difficult to say no thanks ur not alone there manors cost nothing

some people dont send a message worthy of a reply tho

ive had some messages and ive looked at the pics and they have looked quite nice actually but their message has been so stupid ive looked at it and thought.....what the hell do i say to that? so i dont bother

i had a message about a hour ago that just said

free for a fuck?

and you say i should reply to that out of respect?

"

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By *ander_X OP   Man
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

Thanks for all the lovely compliments ladies. I think my bathroom probably just has very flattering lighting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would estimate my meets have been 50% me contacting the people or the other way round..

We all get knockbacks and there should be no hard feelings at any negative reply.. I sometimes get sorry I don't like hairy chests.. it's no problem we all as individuals have likes nd dislikes, it's human nature.. And as stated before couples and single ladeis get inundated with hundreds of messages so no reply and delete is to be expected..

It still makes for an exciting lifestyle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yum lol

Nico x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for all the lovely compliments ladies. I think my bathroom probably just has very flattering lighting "

can i pop round and take some pics in your bathroom then

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By *ander_X OP   Man
over a year ago

Greater Manchester


"Thanks for all the lovely compliments ladies. I think my bathroom probably just has very flattering lighting

can i pop round and take some pics in your bathroom then "

Any time Although, it doesn't look like you need its flattering light to me

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