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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

This is for females and couples mainly...

Why is it no matter how hard I try and write a decent profile specific first message that's polite, descriptive of what I'm into and looking for, do I always get a very negative response that in some case is juat rude.

Surely females and couples on here don't like the direct messages such as "nice tits, want me to spunk between them?"

So help us guys out what tips would you give for a first message, we know it needs to stand out but how?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What is an example of a response you've received that is rude?

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By *eally_RosieWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

You’ve had meets OP and one fairly recently by the looks of things, so you are already getting better responses than most guys off here I would imagine.

Were they actually rude or abusive, or did they just not reply?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You’ve had meets OP and one fairly recently by the looks of things, so you are already getting better responses than most guys off here I would imagine.

Were they actually rude or abusive, or did they just not reply?"

The verifications were not from actually meets on this site, they are people I recognised from another site where we meet, so we agreed to verify each other.

Had no meets from fabs, and yes some replies have been rude, I'm not counting ones that didn't reply, I get that and understand that's part of fabs.

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"You’ve had meets OP and one fairly recently by the looks of things, so you are already getting better responses than most guys off here I would imagine.

Were they actually rude or abusive, or did they just not reply?

The verifications were not from actually meets on this site, they are people I recognised from another site where we meet, so we agreed to verify each other.

Had no meets from fabs, and yes some replies have been rude, I'm not counting ones that didn't reply, I get that and understand that's part of fabs.

"

That's not what your profile says. It clearly states you've met some people off here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So you are implying you have had meets from Fab but actually you have not.

It’s personal taste. If you have messaged someone and not read their profile, then they may reply negatively. Most couples and females are so used to messages from single guys that they are not interested in, they just delete and block.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

We're less interested in message content and more interested in how a profile looks and the photos and text we can see and read.

If the profile isn't what we're looking for the the message is irrelevant. The greatest message in the history of great messages on swinging sites would go unread because we'd delete without reading it.

Many women and couples view a profile first before opening (or not) any message.

If people worried more about their profile and less about the specific content of messages, and made sure they at least loosely fitted any preferences clear in the profile they were trying to contact, then they'd likely get more messages read and would get less frustrated when many of their messages went straight in the bin.

A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You’ve had meets OP and one fairly recently by the looks of things, so you are already getting better responses than most guys off here I would imagine.

Were they actually rude or abusive, or did they just not reply?

The verifications were not from actually meets on this site, they are people I recognised from another site where we meet, so we agreed to verify each other.

Had no meets from fabs, and yes some replies have been rude, I'm not counting ones that didn't reply, I get that and understand that's part of fabs.

"

So do you have an example reply of them being rude?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is for females and couples mainly...

Why is it no matter how hard I try and write a decent profile specific first message that's polite, descriptive of what I'm into and looking for, do I always get a very negative response that in some case is juat rude.

Surely females and couples on here don't like the direct messages such as "nice tits, want me to spunk between them?"

So help us guys out what tips would you give for a first message, we know it needs to stand out but how?"

Physically you’re not what they’re after….it’s what this is all about in my opinion!

Concentrate on the positive responses mate and don’t fret about the negatives!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The verifications were not from actually meets on this site, they are people I recognised from another site where we meet, so we agreed to verify each other.

Had no meets from fabs, and yes some replies have been rude, I'm not counting ones that didn't reply, I get that and understand that's part of fabs.

"

So you're suggesting that your verifications are not genuine - as they certainly read as if they were arranged through fab.

To be fair, whether they happened through here or elsewhere, your original post is not presenting an honest picture, is it?

Coupled with your deceptive verifications and a broader picture starts to emerge.

You are meeting people - regardless of how things are arranged, and yet you're here moaning about your apparent lack of success.

If I were you I'd perhaps consider things from a different perspective. From the point of view of those who you are messaging.

They haven't asked you to contact them and, to be fair, we have no idea what you're sending them or what you're saying in your messages - and that's not an invitation to 'bear all' and post the content as sharing the content of private messages is against forum rules.

The written word can often be difficult to interpret in respect of tone etc and what you might consider to be a fairly decent, profile specific message, might actually be something someone takes exception to.

If you beleive someone has been unnecessarily rude in response to a message you've sent them, surely that works as a filter for you.

You're not going to appeal to everybody. In fact, you'r only likely to appeal to a select handful of people - if you're lucky - and you certainly seem to be doing OK given that you've already had a coupe of meets this year.

You're certainly fairing better than a few other men on fab, and yet you're still complaining.

I'm detecting a certain sense of entitlement

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone


"We're less interested in message content and more interested in how a profile looks and the photos and text we can see and read.

If the profile isn't what we're looking for the the message is irrelevant. The greatest message in the history of great messages on swinging sites would go unread because we'd delete without reading it.

Many women and couples view a profile first before opening (or not) any message.

If people worried more about their profile and less about the specific content of messages, and made sure they at least loosely fitted any preferences clear in the profile they were trying to contact, then they'd likely get more messages read and would get less frustrated when many of their messages went straight in the bin.

A"

Exactly this

Ed

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