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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just when we thought we had seen it all we had a couple saying they didn't want to meet us because we don't display our friends list. The reason? By not showing it we were hiding something and it must mean me (M) had been seeing men or TVs and I wasn't straight I was bisexual. And bisexuals engage in risky practices ha ha

The funniest thing is they state on their profile how easy going and friendly they are!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...sounds like a cop out to me...if it wasn't that it would've been something else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well that is just silly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Actually LOL at this , majority of my friends lists are male but have some females on there who I chat too, but have no intention of playing with. So going on couple that messaged you I must now be bi, hmmm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i'll be honest if profiles have a massive friends list i tend not meet them as they come across as just wanting one offs rather then reg fun, either that or they're treating this site like facebook, thats just my personal opinion xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"...sounds like a cop out to me...if it wasn't that it would've been something else. "

They actually have these comments on their profile text. I didn't think they could be serious!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I don't know why people don't just approach those that meet their criteria instead of picking over profiles they have issues with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There seems to be alot of issues surrounding Bi Men?

I'm Orally Bi and don't engage in any unsafe acts other than giving oral... Don't most women do the same??

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

Maybe they just had a few like it lately.. we get single 'straight' guys all the time and alot have freinds lists that consist only of bi men and TV/TS.. so to us thete is enough doubt there that we would not be interested.

Sadly its the way too many behave in a way where they tell lies left right and centre just to get a shag that makes some be very careful.. you dont know what crap they had had that day either.. just goes with the territory on a site like this.. ignore it and move on.. they may be laid back and happy when then see what they want to see.. and if you dont want to show it no worries you obviously werent right for each other.. (that sounds romantic now ive typed it lol.. not meant to )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes I think that nobody can do right from wrong on here. Don't show friends now all bi do show friends won't meet cos got too many. Me I do as I please and sod the rest, works as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't keep a friends list , so so much easier

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The point is not whether they wanted to meet or not (quite frankly we are not arsed if people do or not) but the astonishing small mindedness and the fact that hiding a friends list means someone is hiding the fact they are a deviant bisexual bare-backer.

Also why would anyone be nervous about meeting bisexual men? Do they pounce on you as soon as you take your clothes off?

We hadn't even considered hiding a friends list would concern anybody.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's your profile use it as you see fit I had someone contacting the people on mine trying to badmouth me. So I hid it and its staying that way.

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area


"Sometimes I think that nobody can do right from wrong on here. Don't show friends now all bi do show friends won't meet cos got too many. Me I do as I please and sod the rest, works as well "

and thats how it should be. we say what we expect to see but also say if guys dont want to show ie (Veris) no worries at all just dont message us.. we got no worries with anyone doing as they please just they should not expect us to want to meet us if its not the same.

Also we dont actually ask to see friends list btw was just pointing out a possible reason that couple might have had for saying no if you wont show your friends list. That was going on friends lists already on show on a number of guys profiles that have messaged us..

Friends lists veris and forum can out a liar often so maybe thats there reason i dont know just trying to see all sides of it.. Wasnt calling op bi.. just what we have had thats all..

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By *tarkersandcrutchCouple
over a year ago

TELFORD

does it matter how many friends you have? we have some on our list who we haven't met yet but talk to regularly. I just don't get the obsession.

so what if you hide your friends list, it wouldn't bother us, we read peoples profiles and chat to them and find out about them not look at thier friends to see if they suit us. Madness.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

The smallest most minute details can offend almost anyone on here at times

Im sure some people read the name of the site wrong sometimes and think its called fabwhingers instead of fabswingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think that nobody can do right from wrong on here. Don't show friends now all bi do show friends won't meet cos got too many. Me I do as I please and sod the rest, works as well "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"does it matter how many friends you have? we have some on our list who we haven't met yet but talk to regularly. I just don't get the obsession.

so what if you hide your friends list, it wouldn't bother us, we read peoples profiles and chat to them and find out about them not look at thier friends to see if they suit us. Madness.

"

Exactly our _iew. We take people as we find them. We do like to see some solid verifications though as they at least indicate they are who they are supposed to be.

Oh and I am not bisexual (even though I think it would be fun if I was) but not sure why that would bother anyone anyway. Smacks of homophobia or people not sure of their own sexuality if you ask me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is my profile and I shall do whatever I like with it, and that includes hiding my Friends List and verifications from Day 1.

Don't and won't care what others may think.

Peeps who object to my friends list and verifications being hidden are unlikely to be of interest to me in the first place.

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area


"The point is not whether they wanted to meet or not (quite frankly we are not arsed if people do or not) but the astonishing small mindedness and the fact that hiding a friends list means someone is hiding the fact they are a deviant bisexual bare-backer.

Also why would anyone be nervous about meeting bisexual men? Do they pounce on you as soon as you take your clothes off?

We hadn't even considered hiding a friends list would concern anybody."

we wont meet bi men. its again all bi men getting a no thanks due to the number and large number that in messages insist no man is straight they all want cock and hubby must try it as hed love it.. that atyitude in messages is bad enough but imagine if we met.. we had so many like that that we just found it easier and less stressful to say no bi men..

Sadly its the deviant side to many on here that make everyone a bit cautious..and everyone has the right to ask to see what makes them happy to meet exactly the same as everyone has the right not to show anything they dont want to.

We asked for veris to be shown.. one guy only had one and he showed it but it was from a member who looked so dirty and horrid that we would never meet him.. then another straight guy showed his few and one was from a guy saying what a hot guy he was lol not that straight.. he hid that one after we said no.

But thats the mentality of people on here so each to there own and if thats what makes them happy to meet they are entitled to have that as their option and there will be enough people who will be happy to show them so why not.. same if you dont want to plenty dont and plenty happy not to see.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds bizarre but each to there own

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The point is not whether they wanted to meet or not (quite frankly we are not arsed if people do or not) but the astonishing small mindedness and the fact that hiding a friends list means someone is hiding the fact they are a deviant bisexual bare-backer.

Also why would anyone be nervous about meeting bisexual men? Do they pounce on you as soon as you take your clothes off?

We hadn't even considered hiding a friends list would concern anybody.

we wont meet bi men. its again all bi men getting a no thanks due to the number and large number that in messages insist no man is straight they all want cock and hubby must try it as hed love it.. that atyitude in messages is bad enough but imagine if we met.. we had so many like that that we just found it easier and less stressful to say no bi men..

Sadly its the deviant side to many on here that make everyone a bit cautious..and everyone has the right to ask to see what makes them happy to meet exactly the same as everyone has the right not to show anything they dont want to.

We asked for veris to be shown.. one guy only had one and he showed it but it was from a member who looked so dirty and horrid that we would never meet him.. then another straight guy showed his few and one was from a guy saying what a hot guy he was lol not that straight.. he hid that one after we said no.

But thats the mentality of people on here so each to there own and if thats what makes them happy to meet they are entitled to have that as their option and there will be enough people who will be happy to show them so why not.. same if you dont want to plenty dont and plenty happy not to see.

"

We have never had a message like that from a bisexual man.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

My friends list is hidden because I want it to be

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area


"The point is not whether they wanted to meet or not (quite frankly we are not arsed if people do or not) but the astonishing small mindedness and the fact that hiding a friends list means someone is hiding the fact they are a deviant bisexual bare-backer.

Also why would anyone be nervous about meeting bisexual men? Do they pounce on you as soon as you take your clothes off?

We hadn't even considered hiding a friends list would concern anybody.

we wont meet bi men. its again all bi men getting a no thanks due to the number and large number that in messages insist no man is straight they all want cock and hubby must try it as hed love it.. that atyitude in messages is bad enough but imagine if we met.. we had so many like that that we just found it easier and less stressful to say no bi men..

Sadly its the deviant side to many on here that make everyone a bit cautious..and everyone has the right to ask to see what makes them happy to meet exactly the same as everyone has the right not to show anything they dont want to.

We asked for veris to be shown.. one guy only had one and he showed it but it was from a member who looked so dirty and horrid that we would never meet him.. then another straight guy showed his few and one was from a guy saying what a hot guy he was lol not that straight.. he hid that one after we said no.

But thats the mentality of people on here so each to there own and if thats what makes them happy to meet they are entitled to have that as their option and there will be enough people who will be happy to show them so why not.. same if you dont want to plenty dont and plenty happy not to see.

We have never had a message like that from a bisexual man. "

lucky you... dont move to wales..maybe its just here.. but we have no intention of meet bi men..they have the right to be bi and not had a go at but then we have the right to be straight and not have their sexuality shoved down our neck..

Straight hubby had several bi men pushing him to meet insisting he must be bi in just one evening.. we met a straight guy that evening for drinks who spent the time we were with him making eyes at hubby.. turns out he only put straight to get meets.. its a different world here then maybe...who knows..

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By *enny PR9TV/TS
over a year ago

Southport

80% of the guys I meet off Fab say they are straight on their profile, and loads of other Tgirls say the same to me. Many a time I'm asked not to verify as it won't be shown. Even to the point of guys saying to me that their wives would have their bollocks if the saw a veri fron me.

So when people say they won't see bi guys, well you are doing you just don't know it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The point is not whether they wanted to meet or not (quite frankly we are not arsed if people do or not) but the astonishing small mindedness and the fact that hiding a friends list means someone is hiding the fact they are a deviant bisexual bare-backer.

Also why would anyone be nervous about meeting bisexual men? Do they pounce on you as soon as you take your clothes off?

We hadn't even considered hiding a friends list would concern anybody.

we wont meet bi men. its again all bi men getting a no thanks due to the number and large number that in messages insist no man is straight they all want cock and hubby must try it as hed love it.. that atyitude in messages is bad enough but imagine if we met.. we had so many like that that we just found it easier and less stressful to say no bi men..

Sadly its the deviant side to many on here that make everyone a bit cautious..and everyone has the right to ask to see what makes them happy to meet exactly the same as everyone has the right not to show anything they dont want to.

We asked for veris to be shown.. one guy only had one and he showed it but it was from a member who looked so dirty and horrid that we would never meet him.. then another straight guy showed his few and one was from a guy saying what a hot guy he was lol not that straight.. he hid that one after we said no.

But thats the mentality of people on here so each to there own and if thats what makes them happy to meet they are entitled to have that as their option and there will be enough people who will be happy to show them so why not.. same if you dont want to plenty dont and plenty happy not to see.

We have never had a message like that from a bisexual man.

lucky you... dont move to wales..maybe its just here.. but we have no intention of meet bi men..they have the right to be bi and not had a go at but then we have the right to be straight and not have their sexuality shoved down our neck..

Straight hubby had several bi men pushing him to meet insisting he must be bi in just one evening.. we met a straight guy that evening for drinks who spent the time we were with him making eyes at hubby.. turns out he only put straight to get meets.. its a different world here then maybe...who knows.."

Maybe I am not appealing to gay or bisexual men. What is wrong with me lol

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area


"

80% of the guys I meet off Fab say they are straight on their profile, and loads of other Tgirls say the same to me. Many a time I'm asked not to verify as it won't be shown. Even to the point of guys saying to me that their wives would have their bollocks if the saw a veri fron me.

So when people say they won't see bi guys, well you are doing you just don't know it.

"

Maybe but beleive me we chat for ages before we ever meet.. you'd be supprised the tiniest hint always finds them out.. And we dont meet many at all from here as not really many we would want.. but we have not met any bi men.. well apart from socially thats not a problem.. Just wont play with them.. the odd one or two nearly caught us out but we then heard the tiniest indication and thats enough.

What you have to remember is that geuine swingers into to lifestyle for real have no neec to lie about their sexuality..its the guys that (or alot not all) that are on sites like this that have the wrong idea about the site that feel the need to lie to get laid in an anyholes a goal scenario. genuine real swingers have the right attitude and are open about their sexuality and are happy to accept others sexuality and respect it.

Thats the difference.. the ones on here are not honest and not just about that either.. men are crap at telling fibs.. so can soon be caught out ...lol Thats why we arent that bothered about meeting guys from the site ..dont need to.. but should any come along that we are 100% comfortable with then great..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friends list is hidden as are most of my veri's now, if people don't like it tough, if you want to meet me you will, regardless of who I'm friends with, after all, it's me you're about to have fabtastic sex with, not my friends

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto


"Sometimes I think that nobody can do right from wrong on here. Don't show friends now all bi do show friends won't meet cos got too many. Me I do as I please and sod the rest, works as well "

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

won't show mine because some of my friends where getting hassled by people saying "well you met him, why will you not meet me!!!".......

so even with the verifications I do show I ask people if they are sure they want it shown....

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"i'll be honest if profiles have a massive friends list i tend not meet them as they come across as just wanting one offs rather then reg fun, either that or they're treating this site like facebook, thats just my personal opinion xx"

ahem... it will only allow you to show 20 on the friends list....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't show our friends list as we have had other members contacting them and asking about what we get up to!! And as it's no one else's business we hide our friends list along with some our verifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't know why people don't just approach those that meet their criteria instead of picking over profiles they have issues with.

"

Had a guy this week tell me not to be so fucking silly because of a paragraph on my profile stating that I have a sub/Dom relationship with some one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We don't show our friends list as we have had other members contacting them and asking about what we get up to!! And as it's no one else's business we hide our friends list along with some our verifications "

+1

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"won't show mine because some of my friends where getting hassled by people saying "well you met him, why will you not meet me!!!".......

so even with the verifications I do show I ask people if they are sure they want it shown.... "

Great point mate

Likewise, thats happened to me. And I was also getting grief from someone who spotted me, so hid my friends and verifs to protect their privacy.

Just because they are hidden it doesn't mean that you can't reveal them to people who you plan on meeting, or are chatting with. Genuine, decent folk shouldn't have issues with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"won't show mine because some of my friends where getting hassled by people saying "well you met him, why will you not meet me!!!".......

so even with the verifications I do show I ask people if they are sure they want it shown....

Great point mate

Likewise, thats happened to me. And I was also getting grief from someone who spotted me, so hid my friends and verifs to protect their privacy.

Just because they are hidden it doesn't mean that you can't reveal them to people who you plan on meeting, or are chatting with. Genuine, decent folk shouldn't have issues with this"

True, someone contacted me the other day, she was due to meet someone I had met, obviously had checked his profile and seen the veri I had done, but most of mine are hidden, so she asked me what he was like, I showed the veri he'd done, then hid it again, I don't like people bugging my friends.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I hid my friends list because its discretion. The veris are there though to prove I'm real and not a timewaster and the hotlist is for people I quite fancy but havent contacted yet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From reading the whole thread I can see the homophobic tendencies are still alive and kicking !

We hid our friends list as we have a few bi and tv friends on it , from making their acquaintance at our local club . Doesn't mean I am bi , but could be interpreted by bigots that I may be ?

Actually , if the fact that we happily treat gay , bi , tv and ts the same as straight folk may deter potential meets , perhaps we should display it again - because anyone who thinks the way bigots do ,we wouldn't wanna meet anyway !!!

Goes back to display friends list

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/01/13 14:53:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

our friends list is hidden:-its there for us to use(share more intimate pics etc)not for other users to peruse,we have had cases where folk have gone through our friends on another site we use and contacted our friends saying we have recommended them to do so!(we didn't even know who they were or had any contact with them!)

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area


"From reading the whole thread I can see the homophobic tendencies are still alive and kicking !

We hid our friends list as we have a few bi and tv friends on it , from making their acquaintance at our local club . Doesn't mean I am bi , but could be interpreted by bigots that I may be ?

Actually , if the fact that we happily treat gay , bi , tv and ts the same as straight folk may deter potential meets , perhaps we should display it again - because anyone who thinks the way bigots do ,we wouldn't wanna meet anyway !!!

Goes back to display friends list "

Actually.. we have nothing against bi men.. we meet who we want to meet and no one else.. we dont meet bi men because too many that have contacted us have insisted that my straight hubby isnt because no man is straight.. now anyone with that stinking attitude deserves not to be met in our books . Its the same as all the under 35 most have such a childish attitude that we wont meet any doesnt mean that we wont meet under 35 or bi socially.. just wont play with them.. the point we were making was when a straight guy has contacted us with a friends list that is mostly if not all either bi men gay nen and or tv/ts then there is enough to throw doubt over him putting straight.. and the biggest issue with that we have is telling fibs.. after all we dont want life history but health and welfare is paramount and we'd like to know if there are issues with playmates thanks.

After readin posts it still suprises me how quickly people start throwing names around at people simply based on those peoples priorites and preferences in playmates.. very shocking how people get called names because they dont want to play with bi men.. if men are bi or gay good luck to them they deserve to do whatever they want just because we dont like it or want anything to do with it is our own business.

Just because we do not want to have sex with bi me does not make us homphobic.. i have no hate towards them we just dont want to play with them.. everyone or most have preferences in one direction or another

doesnt make them homophobic, ageist, racist or fattist or another name thrown about by certain people on thos site its about time people grew up and let others use the site how they wish.. yes if any guy had any on friends list more than they had women or couples we wouldnt meet.

Not that we are not meeting from this site anyway.. Socially only from this site.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

You can't catch a sexuality just because you are friends or chat with them

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

the obsession drives the most bizarre behaviours

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"From reading the whole thread I can see the homophobic tendencies are still alive and kicking !

We hid our friends list as we have a few bi and tv friends on it , from making their acquaintance at our local club . Doesn't mean I am bi , but could be interpreted by bigots that I may be ?

Actually , if the fact that we happily treat gay , bi , tv and ts the same as straight folk may deter potential meets , perhaps we should display it again - because anyone who thinks the way bigots do ,we wouldn't wanna meet anyway !!!

Goes back to display friends list "

whilst I take your point that hiding your friends list could be misinterpreted by others how does this make them bigots? They maybe drawing the wrong conclusions but bigots is a bit strong

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I would quite happily meet with a bisexual single man or one as part of a couple. It wouldn't make me bisexual or even bi-curious. Seems like others would assume it would though!

M

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry if my post upset anyone - and as we are here to meet folk other than socially we hope we havnt upset any potential meets !

Totally agree with rugby - you can't catch sexuality lol

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"You can't catch a sexuality just because you are friends or chat with them

"

That didn't come across right so will rephrase.

You can't catch a sexuality just because you are friends or chat with bi or gay men or women.

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By *r mrs pCouple
over a year ago

taunton


"The smallest most minute details can offend almost anyone on here at times

Im sure some people read the name of the site wrong sometimes and think its called fabwhingers instead of fabswingers

"

Lol, so true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bigot ~ one who is intolerant to anything other than their own intolerant belief .

Harsh ?

Perhaps , and if I am , I apologise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to be honest..i show my verifies...but u cant really hide anythhing on whos ON ur friends list lol

i might just display mine now in fact

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bigot ~ one who is intolerant to anything other than their own intolerant belief .

Harsh ?

Perhaps , and if I am , I apologise "

yeah i know what it means. I just wonder why you apply it as a catchall to anyone who wonders why you hide your friends list. This isn't a criticism,we hide ours but obviously for different reasons

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why does a thread about hiding your friends list become a thread about homo-phobia ,intolerance etc? we hide ours because we want to and can,its really nothing to do with anybody else how any member runs their account or displays or doesn't display what they do or don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well now ... We look at it like this , we are who and what we are . She is bi and I am not , but if we have any make bi friends there are folk who decide we are not for them .

Calling these folk bigots is perhaps a bit harsh , but it's my interpretation and tbh I am happy to stick to it .

It's a joke that in today's supposed liberal society that there are still people who think like this , and that's why I have put our friends list back up - ironically it's not showing any , but that's because only twenty are shown lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"why does a thread about hiding your friends list become a thread about homo-phobia ,intolerance etc? we hide ours because we want to and can,its really nothing to do with anybody else how any member runs their account or displays or doesn't display what they do or don't"

Because reasons given for hiding it were brought up stating bi men friends would stop some folk wanting to meet , and we had ours hidden because we wanted to , and have now put it back up because we wanted to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/01/13 16:54:07]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"why does a thread about hiding your friends list become a thread about homo-phobia ,intolerance etc? we hide ours because we want to and can,its really nothing to do with anybody else how any member runs their account or displays or doesn't display what they do or don't

Because reasons given for hiding it were brought up stating bi men friends would stop some folk wanting to meet , and we had ours hidden because we wanted to , and have now put it back up because we wanted to "

that may be their reason but it seems to have evolved to the point that everybody who does is homo-phobic etc and some seem to be feeling guilty for hiding it,why should members who choose to hide their friends list be made to feel like they should display it?or is that another thread that needs starting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It could be another thread starter lol

However , as said before - it's up to each and every one of us to do exactly what we want to do , and none of us should feel we have to justify that choice to anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"won't show mine because some of my friends where getting hassled by people saying "well you met him, why will you not meet me!!!".......

so even with the verifications I do show I ask people if they are sure they want it shown.... "

We hid our friends list for almost the same reason one guy was going through it messaging people who are our friends asking for meets and asking us to message the ones he couldn't .

So now we have it hidden to protect the privacy of others

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I'm bi and actually extremely clean and healthy as well, I might add. I've spent a happy 10 mins or so looking at my friends list and not one of them shows their list in public. I'm not so arrogant to assume I'm the common denominator so I can safely assume they are not ashamed to be my friend so must have other reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm bi and actually extremely clean and healthy as well, I might add. I've spent a happy 10 mins or so looking at my friends list and not one of them shows their list in public. I'm not so arrogant to assume I'm the common denominator so I can safely assume they are not ashamed to be my friend so must have other reasons. "

Lol - and there you have it !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"won't show mine because some of my friends where getting hassled by people saying "well you met him, why will you not meet me!!!".......

so even with the verifications I do show I ask people if they are sure they want it shown.... "

Ditto!

And I've had people messaging those I've met asking all kinds of random questions - instead of just asking me!!

Who's on your friends list is your business - no one else's!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's your profile use it as you see fit I had someone contacting the people on mine trying to badmouth me. So I hid it and its staying that way.

"

I've experienced this too, but not to bad mouth.....to ask if I was any good between the sheets! Their words not mine!

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