FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

Nervousness

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

hi all me and my wife want a guy to join us (well its mainly my fantasy but wife is well interested) we have been to La chambre a few times but only got into a room twice.

First time the guys mates started banging on the door as soon as we went in so we asked him to leave.

second time the guy we chose had the smallest cock ever and literally couldnt even get it hard i think it was mainly nerves on his part but again after a few mins of diane sucking him and nothing happening we again asked him to leave.

now my issue is my wife is very very shy and nervous and has to be quite d*unk to start anything i want to do a meet on here at a guys house/hotel but she is quite reluctant any ideas on how i can convince her ??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find a confident guy with experience, take the time to get to know him. Everyone gets a bit nervous, but it goes once the fun starts.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

Personally I would suggest that if she has to be "quite d*unk" to start anything, she isn't as "well up for it" as you suggest.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I would suggest that if she has to be "quite d*unk" to start anything, she isn't as "well up for it" as you suggest. "

have to agree with thus

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"hi all me and my wife want a guy to join us (well its mainly my fantasy but wife is well interested) we have been to La chambre a few times but only got into a room twice.

First time the guys mates started banging on the door as soon as we went in so we asked him to leave.

second time the guy we chose had the smallest

cock ever and literally couldnt even get it hard i think it was mainly nerves on his part but again after a few mins of diane sucking him and nothing happening we again asked him to leave.

now my issue is my wife is very very shy and nervous and has to be quite d*unk to start anything i want to do a meet on here at a guys house/hotel but she is quite reluctant any ideas on how i can convince her ??"

Nope, I think you should probably forget the idea,

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have to agree with above.

Happy to chat with you as had success in this after encouraging my own wife.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi Paul and Diane

Sit back and join the ride; because with a post like this and a profile like yours, you will be inundated with lots of "i'm genuine" offers to help you two out ...i know i would if i was your type lol

Happy Fabbing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

she is up for it she is just very body concious and shy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she doesn't want to do it then no amount of persuasion will encourage her! The fact that your wife has to be almost d*unk to take part sends out big warning signals!!

Perhaps take a step back from the swing world!

If either one of us said " no" I don't want to do that! Then that would be ok... We wouldn't even think about trying to push it any further

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"hi all me and my wife want a guy to join us (well its mainly my fantasy but wife is well interested) we have been to La chambre a few times but only got into a room twice.

First time the guys mates started banging on the door as soon as we went in so we asked him to leave.

second time the guy we chose had the smallest cock ever and literally couldnt even get it hard i think it was mainly nerves on his part but again after a few mins of diane sucking him and nothing happening we again asked him to leave.

now my issue is my wife is very very shy and nervous and has to be quite d*unk to start anything i want to do a meet on here at a guys house/hotel but she is quite reluctant any ideas on how i can convince her ??"

With all due respect...I think you should consider her feelings first & foremost...you say she's reluctant? that's not really a good starting point in my opinion.

Good luck with it all though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Personally I would suggest that if she has to be "quite d*unk" to start anything, she isn't as "well up for it" as you suggest. "

I agree with this too and your use of the word "convince" implies that you don't think she's up for it either.

If hse really does want to branch out and explore her sexuality then take it one step at a time, use role play with just the two of you, watch some porn, read some books, talk about things and don't think about involving a third person until your wife can accept it happily when she's sober.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

thing is when we go into a room with a guy she is all over him like a rash its just the fact of getting into a room

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"she is up for it she is just very body concious and shy."
She does'nt seem like that in her pics.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

she isnt shy with me just with any new people. Had babies so stomache isnt as flat as she would like anymore

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If she doesn't want to do it then no amount of persuasion will encourage her! The fact that your wife has to be almost d*unk to take part sends out big warning signals!!

Perhaps take a step back from the swing world!

If either one of us said " no" I don't want to do that! Then that would be ok... We wouldn't even think about trying to push it any further "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"thing is when we go into a room with a guy she is all over him like a rash its just the fact of getting into a room"

Is that when she is d*unk??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

what when she is d*unk ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *acdoodleMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Shouldn't the wife be asking for advice if its something she wants that much? Just a thought x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what when she is d*unk ?"

Is she d*unk when she is all over the guy like a rash?? Drink is a good way to relax and make you less nervous but at the end if he day you shouldn't do things d*unk that you wouldn't do sober??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

yeah she has been d*unk when we have gone into a room, not d*unk to the point of not knowing what she is doing just tipsy like 4 or 5 drinks and we both talk about it the next day sober and how disappointed we both was infact she was the one that said she was disappointed and gutted he couldnt get it up . Dont know what was wrong with him because i never have an issue getting it up for her she is sooooo sexy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

imo would not play with some one who is d*unk each to there own like .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"she is up for it she is just very body concious and shy."

maybe the guy with the small cock was also

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

said he wasnt and he was only drnking water so have no idea he did say it was his first time too though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably the fact she was d*unk turned him off. I'm sure we all get nervous on meets...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just ask her what would see like to do, could ask her if she wants to do foreplay only and she might want more after that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I would suggest that if she has to be "quite d*unk" to start anything, she isn't as "well up for it" as you suggest. "

I'd agree.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

thanks for the advice

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

I think I see what you are driving at. I know a couple of people that are very shy and use drink to combat the shyness. I think if I were you I would slow down a little. Maybe go to a few couples nights / socials and just chat and get to know people. Mrs P can be body concious to. But she has realised that the genuine people we generally like to meet in the scene don't give a rats arse. You either fancy them or you don't......... NEXT....

As for finding the right guy. That's just going to take time and patience there's lots out there that are willing, not so many that are capable and even less that fully understand the genuine swinging scene imho. That's not aimed at anyone in particular just our observations. They are out there they just take time to find.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I would suggest that if she has to be "quite d*unk" to start anything, she isn't as "well up for it" as you suggest. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r-MissCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Really sounds like your wife is just not into the whole idea if she has to be d*unk. There is a difference between a few glasses of wine to calm the nerves and being d*unk.

Perhaps stay away from clubs as they can be intimidating when you are being hounded by singles guys.

If she does want to do an actually meet then let her pick a guy from here. Perhaps have a social meet first. Look for a guy with good verifications with experince of meeting couples.

If she is not 100% sure she wants to do a meet, it could all end in tears.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get to know somebody first

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"yeah she has been d*unk when we have gone into a room, not d*unk to the point of not knowing what she is doing just tipsy like 4 or 5 drinks and we both talk about it the next day sober and how disappointed we both was infact she was the one that said she was disappointed and gutted he couldnt get it up . Dont know what was wrong with him because i never have an issue getting it up for her she is sooooo sexy"

He probably had nothing wrong with him, it happens to men especially when they're nervous and the pressure is on and maybe the thought of having sex with a woman who had to drink 4 or 5 drinks in order to do it just didn't do it for him.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said in the above why not go to a social first and get to know the guy first, that way you all can have a little dutch courage and relax and then take it from there, less pressure and more erotic thee flirting teasing, givivng the little smailes, the eyes, create a atmosphere thats more suitable to a date, instead of a porn movie lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Probably the fact she was d*unk turned him off. I'm sure we all get nervous on meets..."

is what i thought -

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

also have to say lol nice pics and she looks gorgeous

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"she isnt shy with me just with any new people. Had babies so stomache isnt as flat as she would like anymore"

I know the feeling

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know the feeling of being body concious and its only recentley that I've felt comfortable in my own skin.

Pics look amazing and think you should find a single guy off here who is Verified. Get to know him and go for it. Good luck x x x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There could be so many things at play here.

Personally I'd spend time getting to know someone who is verified, genuine, good guy, suits you both and someone you can get on with in a social setting too.

Yup have a drink to settle the nerves, we all get them... enjoy each others company... maybe in private, the three of you, at your home, where she feels safe and comfy, not in a club where you are on show or external factors are present.

Take it slow.... let him pleasure her first, a massage and then build up to something more sexual, or let him watch while the two of you have fun and then call him over.

What do I know.

MMF is my absolute favourite, but I get nerves every time !!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would suggest meeting a guy for a social meet in a pub or even go for a coffee with the idea of no play on the first meet. That will sort out the decent guys on here lol. Then talk together after and see if you are both happy. You should not be getting people d*unk. Relaxed maybe but you need control.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top