FabSwingers.com forum: First full swap

By *rMrs84 OP Couple
over a year ago

Doncaster

So we’re debating our first full swap. We’ve been in the lifestyle for a few years and had a good time. Mr has always been for Mrs to sleep with others and Mrs has been nervous for fears of STIs and the like.

We’ve had a good talk over the last couple of weeks and agreed o go for it. Anyone got any advice on how to make the move from soft to full swap?

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By *enguy82Man
over a year ago

Wallingford

Appreciate I’m replying as a single profile but have full swapped as a couple, my advice for what it’s worth is to have a full discussion about boundaries. Think of how you have sex together and if any of that is off limits to you both with others, kissing, where a man can cum etc

And to have agreed verbal and non verbal communication signs between each other, a pinch, a squeeze or something along those lines

Hopefully you find it decent advice, everyone is different and will have different boundaries

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Do you actually want to move to full swap?

If you genuinely do then maybe have a social meet with a likely couple, agree what you'd like to happen and go for it. If you decide that it's really not for you then don't do it again.

Good luck

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Also agree between yourselves that if either of you says clearly and unequivocably "stop" then you both stop. Don't rely on signs etc they are often unnoticed or misinterpreted.

If you feel at any time that you want to talk to each other privately, say so and take five minutes out.

Your relationship is important and should be your first consideration.

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By *lex.and.SexCouple
over a year ago

Bedale

If you have been soft swapping for a while and are comfortable with it then presumably you already have the lines of communication open and successful, the move to full swap brings with it a few small additional things which may require discussion but by and large the same factors will apply as you are already doing.

Personally I'd consider a couple you are already playing with soft and see if they are keen to go full. That way you already have an established relationship of trust and there really isn't that huge of a leap from where you are to where you want to be.

Alternatively, slide into our DMs as they say nowadays haha

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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

Decide what you will and won't do and stick to it, no is no at the end of the day. Protection .see how it goes on a social first. We always have a word/code that we each know should you want to stop

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By *ipi2001Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

It's very difficult to find four way attraction.

It might happen that 2 people enjoy and the other don't.

If you decide to have a full swap...take it as an experiment..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't forget that STI's can be caught outside of full-swap too

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By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

No two couples are the same, but a couple of things we have found/prefer in our meets:

Take your time and find the right people, we rushed into our first meet but the ones we have had since have been amazing.

Constantly talk it over between yourselves. You will have no idea how either of you will react to seeing the other having actual sex with someone. It's a big step. Seems way bigger than soft play for some reason. Fortunately we were fine with it, but if not talk it through. I'd tell the other couple too, so they can take it slowly and know why if either of you have a wobble.

Clear boundaries - we have stuff we keep between ourselves and things we are happy to share.

Look out for each other. Even if playing I'm always checking to make sure the other partner isn't straying from the agreed boundary and checking in with Mrs.

And our favourite - we always end the night together. It can be 3/4 am, we can be knackered, but we always finish the night with a 'reclaim' fuck to assure each other that we are still each others!

Just don't build it up too much, it's meant to be fun x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Don't forget that STI's can be caught outside of full-swap too

A very good point, frequently overlooked

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I agree on having a social first,

Never take one for the team.

Communicate and set your own goals and boundaries and don't break away from these.

Don't be pressured ,go at your own pace.keep talking to each other.

Enjoy yourselves

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By *irty-pairCouple
over a year ago

Essex

As everyone else has said, set your boundaries and make sure everyone knows them. Get to know the couple first, too.

Sounds obvious, but make sure everyone has the same expectations and don’t be afraid to back out if you’re not happy with something. A decent couple will understand.

But enjoy. We started our journey last year and we’ve never looked back x

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

I would sugest visiting a swinger club like Pandora ,Quest or HU9, i believe are relatively near by. I think clubs are great places for first full swap as you both can be relaxed , socialise with people and having a decision much more convincing for you both either you both decide for full swap or not and of course the all sexy environment really can make a big positive diference for first time as in clubs you both can have max privacy

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By *rMrs84 OP Couple
over a year ago

Doncaster

Thanks to all for the insights. Mostly stuff we do all ready which is really reassuring. Thanks.

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"It's very difficult to find four way attraction.

It might happen that 2 people enjoy and the other don't.

If you decide to have a full swap...take it as an experiment..

So agree with you! One or other of us has often fancied the other couple but we don't take one for the team! We imagine the same is true from the couples we have talked with.

We are now looking to play a bit more on our own to make sure that if one of us is interested then it is fine to have a play. It took us a while to get comfortable with this but now we are pretty relaxed. It is all about fun, so we don’t have anything off limits other than safe sex!!

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By *ap-scarCouple
over a year ago

Sleaford

Definately agree to have a social first...be absolutely sure that it's what you both want!

Perhaps talk about boundaries. We always check on each other throughout as we generally do same room stuff and if one of us isn't feeling it then we agree to stop.

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By *oshnbex30Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

[Removed by poster at 17/04/23 20:46:11]

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By *oshnbex30Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

Make sure it’s what you both really want.

Make sure one of you aren’t doing it to just please the other.

Speak about it properly as miscommunication can ruin a relationship.

Talk about boundaries, agree on a safe word of some sort incase one of you aren’t feeling it.

Have a social first with the couple make sure your all comfortable with each other

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