FabSwingers.com forum: Not sure how I feel about this..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just came across my ex on here. He’s supposedly in a loving, happy (monogamous) relationship. He cheated on me when we were together and now it looks like he’s doing it to his new girlfriend.

His profile is set up as a single guy, one that can’t accommodate

Do you believe in the adage, once a cheater…

(I do not count ENM Poly or swinging as cheating as it’s openly discussed and everyone knows.)

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

He's your ex

Leave him to it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’m am. I’ve blocked him so I can’t see him.

I am intrigued on what people think, once someone cheats will they always?

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Just be thankful you're out of the relationship.

Oh and do you ever share those Cadburys cream eggs?

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

There can be lots of reasons why relationships break down. I like to see the positives in people and hope that he learned his lesson.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

No I don't think that's always the case, I've cheated in the past I'm ashamed to say, however that guilt and knowing I caused that hurt for selfish reasons means I'd never do it to anyone again!

I've been the cheat and cheated on (more the latter) and can say it's definitely not a choice I'd ever pick again.

Mrs

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

If they are a cheat when younger ,maybe they can grow up an grow out of it

Maybe some do change ,they cheat out of unhappiness or they want to end their relationship.

I think there are some who will always cheat just because they can ,no matter how good they have it.so some will never change,but some can.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just came across my ex on here. He’s supposedly in a loving, happy (monogamous) relationship. He cheated on me when we were together and now it looks like he’s doing it to his new girlfriend.

His profile is set up as a single guy, one that can’t accommodate

Do you believe in the adage, once a cheater…

(I do not count ENM Poly or swinging as cheating as it’s openly discussed and everyone knows.)"

If you're able to then I'd definitely let his new girlfriend know. Once a cheater always a cheater maybe not but there are definitely signs of him being a cheating scumbag again.

I know that some people will say it's not your relationship so not your business to tell her/out him, but I can't help but think that if I was in her position then I'd want to know, and I assume as someone that he also cheated on you'd feel the same.

By telling her you'd be doing a favour to a stranger, by not telling her you're doing a favour to a cheater who might be cheating again.

Maybe it turns out he's here with her permission, only way to know would be to tell her and hear from her that she's okay with it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think because I see an over abundance of people cheating on partners, here and dating apps, I’m not entirely convinced I will trust a partner again.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

"Just came across my ex on here. He’s supposedly in a loving, happy (monogamous) relationship. He cheated on me when we were together and now it looks like he’s doing it to his new girlfriend.

His profile is set up as a single guy, one that can’t accommodate

Do you believe in the adage, once a cheater…

(I do not count ENM Poly or swinging as cheating as it’s openly discussed and everyone knows.)"
You've blocked him, leave him to it. What he does isn't your responibility.

Did it effect you emotionlly?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think because I see an over abundance of people cheating on partners, here and dating apps, I’m not entirely convinced I will trust a partner again.

If you're asking for monogamy and they agree then break it, their bad.

Personally I think monogamy is a silly idea these days, the thought that a woman wouldn't ever fancy or want to fuck another guy in her life is ridiculous. Trust is more important, agree boundaries and stick to those. I'd love my next partner to be a swinger and have great experiences with others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think because I see an over abundance of people cheating on partners, here and dating apps, I’m not entirely convinced I will trust a partner again.

Trust in others is unfortunately something hard to earn but easy to lose.

I have somewhat similar issues in that regard due to partners and friends breaking my trust in ways other than cheating, a lot of people suck and not in the fun way, but some other people are kind of alright at least.

Hopefully regardless of how things turn out, whether you regain your ability to trust or not, you end up happy.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

"I’m am. I’ve blocked him so I can’t see him.

I am intrigued on what people think, once someone cheats will they always?"
It's not just the cheating, its also the lying that comes with the cheating.

People can only change through time, experience and personal growth.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No it isn't true that once someone cheats they always will.

The chancers will but sometimes a person moves on to a relationship that they don't want to muck up.

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