FabSwingers.com forum: Yes I’m married but this is a swingers website.

By *ucy78 OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Cardiff

Are my confused or missing a point on here?

Yes I’m married. But 90% women and all other genders refuse to meet but yet they meet single genders??

It’s wife’s fantasy me being used having fun with others that turns her on. So surely we are swingers just she doesn’t want involvement or penetration by others.

Any advice on my thoughts appreciated

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By *ickingdelightMan
over a year ago

Cotswolds

If you’re seeking women they simply have so many options so yes it’s a swingers site but they can and are picky.

I’m married and with wife knowledge and support. Yet have same challenges. A few have wanted my wife to discuss and ‘approve’ which she sees as an insult and the dynamic is us chatting pre-post a meet. So lost a few potential meets due to not doing that…

Unfortunately again it goes back to most guys will happily sleep with a married female but not many women will sleep with married guys and they see those who are above board and not cheating either as lying or simply too much hassle.

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By *ucy78 OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Cardiff

I couldn’t agree more. Both seem to be in exact same circumstances.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Just because someone is on a swingers website doesn't mean they're compatible with you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sounds as though you want the quoted 90% to change their views or opinions to match yours.

Swingers, sure.

With freedom of choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are my confused or missing a point on here?

Yes I’m married. But 90% women and all other genders refuse to meet but yet they meet single genders??

It’s wife’s fantasy me being used having fun with others that turns her on. So surely we are swingers just she doesn’t want involvement or penetration by others.

Any advice on my thoughts appreciated "

I think (like many others), you are taking the site name too literally. When it was first set up it was a swingers site, but it has evolved now into more of an adult casual sex site.

Single females often don't want the drama of meeting married men, even if they are playing with permission.

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By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I don’t think it’s an unreasonable request to ask to speak to the female half of the supposed couple beforehand. You’re expecting someone to basically take your word for it? It’s a no from me. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only meet single men myself now, I have met married in the past but it no longer appeals to me. If people only want to meet single people, then that's their perogative and making a thread on the forum about it, is not going to change anything ...

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By *hegirlwiththepeachtattooWoman
over a year ago

"Are my confused or missing a point on here?

Yes I’m married. But 90% women and all other genders refuse to meet but yet they meet single genders??

It’s wife’s fantasy me being used having fun with others that turns her on. So surely we are swingers just she doesn’t want involvement or penetration by others.

Any advice on my thoughts appreciated

I think (like many others), you are taking the site name too literally. When it was first set up it was a swingers site, but it has evolved now into more of an adult casual sex site.

Single females often don't want the drama of meeting married men, even if they are playing with permission.

This 100%. I’ve been on the scene many years, and the amount of wives/girlfriends who don’t really know or end up getting jealous is huge. It’s much easier for me to not get involved in the first place, it’s not like there’s a shortage of men on here. I’ll go for the drama free option, thanks.

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

I'm sorry but saying it's your wife's fantasy for you to fuck other women is all well and good, but with no way of proving that to potential meets then it's just all words isn't it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would see a married guy with his wife's consent. But unfortunately the only way to know that she is aware is to speak with her. Which makes people uncomfortable so I stick to seeing single people, or couples.

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By *asques and boxersCouple
over a year ago

Ashford and dept16

Thinking as a couple if you play with single guys. Then unless your very naive you must know the likely hood is a good splattering will be otherwise attached. However as a male and self proclaimed Swinger one finds it difficult to understand exactly what it is you are sharing apart from yourself.

The french call this a libertine lifestyle a state of mind seeking pleasure with feeling and the upmost respect for each others rights of choices respecting everyones boundries.

So by all means seek your pleasures as you want them bu up most respect to others sought pleasures.

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

Yeah because nobody ever lies to get laid eh? Get her involved, she doesn't have to have sex with anyone

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By *asques and boxersCouple
over a year ago

Ashford and dept16

"Yeah because nobody ever lies to get laid eh? Get her involved, she doesn't have to have sex with anyone"

Have met (single) guys who turn out not be thats their problem, but if someones says they have permission. They partner/spouse condones them playing with others, even says she gets a buz from it. Then hell yes! We'd want to chat to her. If she is cuckold then lets share the pleasure! If not why bother to explain so???

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By *owestoft ManMan
over a year ago

Lowestoft

lol Swinger is an umbrella for many many scenarios and most are very different from the others. You just have to be patient and respectful and eventually something will come along. With my Ex it was always me looking for the men online and had specific requirements lol.

The thing that has always bewildered me is the profiles that have little to no information and no Photos. Words and Photos combined give potential partners a good idea of what you are and what they are looking for. But saying that there are so many, especially couples and females with fake pics and not a true description of themselves. So many fakes lol. But alas its the joy of the swinging world hey

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By *entlecaressMan
over a year ago

Wakefield/ Beverley

For me its simular to swingers clubs not everyone who goes wants to have sex with other people, some just want to socialise, some to have the excitement but not swop, some to look but not taste others that dont see anyone they fancy etc etc. Its just fab lots of people with different needs and agendas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As swingers, nobody is compelled to have sex with anyone.

Though it might sometimes seem that way in some forum posts.

We choose to swing with those that catch our attention, turn us on, not off.

It doesn't come down to only body image, but many aspects.

Sexual kicks are predominantly in the mind, and if something doesn't sit well, doesn't feel quite right, then the sexual interest drops.

It's as simple as that.

Unfortunately, for you, many couples will be turned off at the thought of maybe they are aiding cheating.

Unless your wife is happy to meet, video call or whatever, to state she is happy for you to meet alone.

Even then, that can bring it's own issues if there's regret or jealousy.

A couple meeting together can also bring regret and jealousy, but less likely to create issues for the other couple/single lady.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean if you want to get technical and the meaning of the word swinger isn’t it couples sharing partners together ?

By that definition you’re not a swinger either as your wife doesn’t play or even get involved to give permission?

Yes I’m being pedantic but when you start challenging others to how they use this site you can expect a fair bit of backlash as to how you use it.

As has been said already countless times here, everyone uses it for their own reason now and each is as valid as the other in my book

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"It’s wife’s fantasy me being used having fun with others that turns her on. So surely we are swingers just she doesn’t want involvement or penetration by others.

Any advice on my thoughts appreciated "

My advice is for the two of you to set up a couple's profile together, which she is actively involved in or takes the lead in finding you play partners. It's her fantasy but she doesn't want any involvment? Well, she might have to compromise slightly, because it's simply too easy for liers and cheats to use the ol' "yeah she's given me full permission for me to do this completely solo and without any involement herself..."

With the right profile set up, you could both have the fun you're after. She doesn't need to meet anyone or play herself to do this. I guess it depends how badly she wants her fantasy / turn-on, as leaving you to try and arrange this sort of thing completely by yourself is going to be much more challenging.

Good luck

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"I don’t think it’s an unreasonable request to ask to speak to the female half of the supposed couple beforehand. You’re expecting someone to basically take your word for it? It’s a no from me. X"

Same, but sadly too many lie so id want to speak to the wife too.

My partner meets alone and i happily confirm im ok with this to women or couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can you not have a joint social first then? I've met couples where its been only the male seeking to meet, but I've met the wife for a chat too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd advise a face-to-face, or at least a facetime though. I don't do group kik chat to verify anymore, as I've had a few blokes who were clearly just pretending they were chatting as the 'wife', as well

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Many don't believe its with permission, the hassle of trying to get a conversation with the Mrs is always tricky, it's just easier to avoid the "playing with permission" profiles.

I'd rather unattached unless I've spoken with both.

Mrs

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By *unfunfun xMan
over a year ago

LONDON

I'm sure this has been asked many a time, but specifically to the couples, do you worry your wife/husband/partner will leave with a person they slept with or secretly see them behind your back? And also if the guy or woman says oh god gotta meet him/her but one says nope not happening does it cause a minor riff.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"I'm sure this has been asked many a time, but specifically to the couples, do you worry your wife/husband/partner will leave with a person they slept with or secretly see them behind your back? And also if the guy or woman says oh god gotta meet him/her but one says nope not happening does it cause a minor riff. "

Not at all, swinging requires a huge amount of trust and communication, if you don't have that you shouldn't be swinging.

Mrs

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

People have preferences and standards, not meeting married men with single profiles is just one of them. Plus what you're looking for is quite niche.

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By *unfunfun xMan
over a year ago

LONDON

Not at all, swinging requires a huge amount of trust and communication, if you don't have that you shouldn't be swinging.

Mrs "
thanks

yes total commitment line never to be crossed thanks for answer was just curious as there are some absolute stunning females on here and also model looking blokes.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Not at all, swinging requires a huge amount of trust and communication, if you don't have that you shouldn't be swinging.

Mrs thanks

yes total commitment line never to be crossed thanks for answer was just curious as there are some absolute stunning females on here and also model looking blokes. "

There is, to the other part of one isn't feeling it then it's a no from both, never causes any issues, the no is end of the subject, we wouldn't want one of us in a situation we would be uncomfortable, that's not hot.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just because someone is on a swingers website doesn't mean they're compatible with you

This

I get so much abuse at times because I won't meet just anyone.

It maybe a swingers site that doesnt mean I'll have sex with anyone !

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By *unfunfun xMan
over a year ago

LONDON

Think that's amazing proper strong committed relationship, its only nearly happened once with me when with a ex partner, we was out in club we could of taken this woman back she was proper up for it drinks flowing all bit tipsy but we didn't. Next morning when sober we discussed it and said it could of broken our relationship may of added excitement

but was to much of a risk worth taking part of me thinks we should off but part of me thinks glad didn't as we spent many years together and to this day still friends. But do admire the couples on here I'm single so doesn't matter but if had partner could I? It's one them toss a coin shall we or not lol.

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"Many don't believe its with permission, the hassle of trying to get a conversation with the Mrs is always tricky, it's just easier to avoid the "playing with permission" profiles.

I'd rather unattached unless I've spoken with both.

Mrs"

Hmm. I don't doubt that it is just easier to avoid confirming those 'playing with permission' and choosing 'unattached' instead. But, one has to wonder how many of those aren't just lying about being attached (and therefore not having permission) in the first place...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are my confused or missing a point on here?

Yes I’m married. But 90% women and all other genders refuse to meet but yet they meet single genders??

It’s wife’s fantasy me being used having fun with others that turns her on. So surely we are swingers just she doesn’t want involvement or penetration by others.

Any advice on my thoughts appreciated "

We don't have an issue with married guys, as far as we're concerned that's there personal business. To be fair there usually more discreet. We don't meet halves of couples on here though as we prefer not to be part of that dynamic, if we meet a couples profile we would expect to meet a couple, not just 1 half

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