FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

Do other women get let down too?

Jump to newest
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hilliplisa790Couple
over a year ago

Paignton

Happens a lot on here

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ymbunnyfitCouple
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Yes definitely, happened few times now guys let us down last minute xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ev_1Couple
over a year ago

Bickliegh

It's getting worse x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow, based only on the pictures available I can't believe any of you get stood up . More fool them xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock


"Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show "

That’s such a shame, especially when you are worked up and looking for fun !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock


"I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?"

We got lots of messages from guys telling us they are in our area today, can we meet like within 10 minutes so that’s always a problem with guys on here. The other issue we have is that because we are predominantly looking for cuckold scenarios you get messed about by people who don’t understand the dynamic you are looking for in your play.

I think fantasists and picture collectors are par for the course on here and you just have to work your way around them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show

That’s such a shame, especially when you are worked up and looking for fun !"

It's so frustrating. I was not in a good mood when he didn't show up or even message to say he couldn't make it x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock


"Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show

That’s such a shame, especially when you are worked up and looking for fun !

It's so frustrating. I was not in a good mood when he didn't show up or even message to say he couldn't make it x"

We’ve had that happen to us, not nice !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happens a lot.

Some guys arrange meets to see if it'll lead to more picture sharing before.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear you’re having issues! Only advice we can give is to keep rolling with the punches til you find the right people worth sharing your time with

We haven’t been let down but we can tell most women we get chatting to on here have been let down quite a lot in the past. Shame there’s a few ruining it for the rest of us genuine couples looking for a lovely lady

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oots11Couple
over a year ago

wirral

Yes had a few of late last min too makes you think is it worth carrying on

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyfuckery69Couple
over a year ago

Hemel Hempstead

24 socials organised only 1 couple showed , thats 23 no shows ...we are not very active here anymore .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
over a year ago

Stourbridge


"24 socials organised only 1 couple showed , thats 23 no shows ...we are not very active here anymore . "

That’s an incredibly disappointing result, no wonder you are fed up. Cannot understand why people do this deliberately.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock


"24 socials organised only 1 couple showed , thats 23 no shows ...we are not very active here anymore . "

Not surprising, but it does show the problems you have meeting like-minded people on here !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Dark GentlemanMan
over a year ago

London


"Happens a lot.

Some guys arrange meets to see if it'll lead to more picture sharing before. "

I can't understand why people would prefer pics than meeting people in person. Different stroked for different folks. However I agree it's a massive disrespect and waste of peoples time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andA123Couple
over a year ago

cannock


"24 socials organised only 1 couple showed , thats 23 no shows ...we are not very active here anymore .

Not surprising, but it does show the problems you have meeting like-minded people on here !"

don’t know why someone wouldn’t show up to a meet with you very sexy pictures

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

I’ve had the same a few times, you are definitely not alone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

I organised a recent party, 4 couples confirmed attendance after a few messages, some even spoke on the phone. All no show and no message, to say they couldn't make it. Another 2 couples at least had the decency and manners to let us know they wouldn't be coming. You want 5 couples at your party, then invite 20 it seems, that way you might get 3.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A"

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!"

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A"

A lot of the time I would say it depends on the dynamic of the couple, hotwife couples like ourselves tend to be driven to meet by the female of the couple, whereas I think a lot of male-led couples the females aren’t that bothered and feel pressured at times.

It’s not a total answer but one I think worth consideration.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

That is cruel, sorry they did that to you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

Basically, you are saying I am the problem, thanks for the confidence boost.

I really needed that put down today

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show "

Wow are you kidding me .. He actually stood you up!! What a fool , Look at you, HOT AS

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *usty07Woman
over a year ago

Lancashire

I met a guy a few times and we were having fun...we were even talking about having a couples play account .

I had plans one night and couldn't meet him when he asked me to ....

Hes blocked me and was out there like flu spreading himself about ....then when someone did it to him he actually unlocked me and messaged me ...no thanks !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eachButtonWoman
over a year ago

Bath

It's happened to me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *usty07Woman
over a year ago

Lancashire


"Basically, you are saying I am the problem, thanks for the confidence boost.

I really needed that put down today "

Big hugs - don't let them get you down

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

Some people are like that. Obviously, I never asked if I was the problem. I asked for a confidence boost and horror stories.

Ignore them, they are looking to insult me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *d4fun73Man
over a year ago

Shipley


"I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?"

Are you a me or we as your a couple?!

Clubs are your best bet at least people are there!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edstockings2Couple
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

I have a single female profile and I get let down at least 50% of the time with out any notice and probably another 25% with a lame excuse. It getting worse.

Xxxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

We are not a couple, he is just a bud. He has his own profile but uses mine sometimes. He doesn't go club's. I used to go chameleons a few years back, I love that place but from experience you need back up lmao.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

I've been let down by 2 different women recently, so it's not just guys. This place attracts time wasters of all genders unfortunately

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edi123Couple
over a year ago

aberystwyth

Yep, your not alone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A"

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received. "

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *neforutoMan
over a year ago

Fantasy land in the SW

Its hard enough as a bloke to get others intrested and even more so for us attached playing solo. Surely theres a way to demonstrate Im genuine other than to spend hours online sending mesages that never get replied to? Any folks who read my profile and have helpful hints let me know - please keep the morals about my situation to yourself though please.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No your defo not the only one. I've been let down loads over the years even if well verified etc and lots of chatting doesn't make it 100%. I have found if the meet is planned too far in advance people are more likely to back out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

"

Go on, say the common denominator, so that we all can see what you mean.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

Go on, say the common denominator, so that we all can see what you mean. "

It's obvious, no?

If I were to be repeatedly let down, find myself catfished and duped by people pretending to be what they're not, had meets constantly cancelled from all manner of different profiles and was finding myself suddenly ghosted, ignored or blocked after days, weeks or months of messaging someone?

The only constant would be me.

A

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why I go to clubs as it’s safer and I’m guaranteed fun and zero let downs. Win win and yes I go alone so anyone can do it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *punk n gushCouple
over a year ago

deal

We've been let down before but also had to let someone down on the day as my mum died and we didn't like doing but it couldn't be helped and we had some major abuse from them for it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ngelLordCouple
over a year ago

Newport

Plenty off times unfortunately

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bad stunt backing out at the last minute, unless there is a valid reason, then perhaps a friendly message saying why.

Not hard really

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

no i cant remember the last time i / we were let down ...most of those who waste peoples time are pretty easy to spot via messages ... i guess the process to meet is pretty robust

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

Go on, say the common denominator, so that we all can see what you mean.

It's obvious, no?

If I were to be repeatedly let down, find myself catfished and duped by people pretending to be what they're not, had meets constantly cancelled from all manner of different profiles and was finding myself suddenly ghosted, ignored or blocked after days, weeks or months of messaging someone?

The only constant would be me.

A"

I knew all along you meant us and your still skirting around it by your answer. So, to all those on fab who experience no shows, it's our fault. Exactly what I said, that you said, twice. Your fluffy comment that it's you is just an indirect way of telling us all, we're not worthy of meeting.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

Why are you still going on? I obviously said I thought that comment was a put-down. You are not being honest you are attempting to bully and it comes across as if you have no social skills whatsoever. Read the room mate, your comments are not wanted.

The fact that you come back and start asking yourself questions shows your own intent.

The fact that you are writing so much also shows that you are very very lonely.

I will give you points on writing but you come across as rude, condescending, arrogant, ignorant, and quite honestly a bully. Having great grammar is awesome but not being able to communicate in a socially acceptable manner makes you look silly. I don't like silly men. Please leave this thread.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

Go on, say the common denominator, so that we all can see what you mean.

It's obvious, no?

If I were to be repeatedly let down, find myself catfished and duped by people pretending to be what they're not, had meets constantly cancelled from all manner of different profiles and was finding myself suddenly ghosted, ignored or blocked after days, weeks or months of messaging someone?

The only constant would be me.

A

I knew all along you meant us and your still skirting around it by your answer. So, to all those on fab who experience no shows, it's our fault. Exactly what I said, that you said, twice. Your fluffy comment that it's you is just an indirect way of telling us all, we're not worthy of meeting. "

Nice attempt to twist my words again.

For the final time. If someone is consistently, frequently, regularly, on an ongoing basis - or whatever word/words you choose to use - being let down, messed around or stood up then what is the single, solitary, one and only constant in the equation?

I have not once said anyone isn't worth meeting. I have not once said that those to whom it happens once or twice, or on rare occasions, are to blame.

Maybe go back and read the words I typed. All of them. Then maybe you'll see the point I'm making.

Because so far it seems to be going over the heads of some.

But hey. Its not my concern at all. Happy fabbing.

A

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/03/23 11:58:51]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

It's not just you OP; I've been let down by three single ladies over the last month

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think some men are just all talk when they are horny online

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?"
i would not dream of letting any one down, who i arranged to meet if they were local.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane


"I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?"

Happened to me loads of times...and that's why I meet now at socials and parties.otherwise it just a waste of time. so many couples daydreaming on here.saying one thing...doing other...and have no intention to meet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingercookie OP   Couple
over a year ago

crewe

I regret going in a mood and deleting my old profile...maybe the universe is teaching me a lesson mawahaha. I had loads of verifications on them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I'll say the same as I'd say to a single guy or couple asking the question.

If its happening frequently there's only one common denominator.

Something needs to change if you want to reduce the number of times you're encountering problems and unfortunately that means changing your approach. You can never, ever control the behaviour of others but you can adjust what you're doing yourself to minimise no shows and failed meets.

Sorry there's no sugar coating or magic wand solution to the issue but the truth is that we're all responsible for our own checks and balances and pre-meet due diligence. Frequently issues means there's either something wrong with the checks you're undertaking or that you're looking to meet the wrong people in the first place.

Hopefully things will improve for you.

A

It sounds very smug and condescending to suggest, everyone on here complaining about no shows, aren't doing their due diligence. Prey tell what more can you do, when they have recent verifications and spoke on phone. Its not as if I'm buying car and can get it checked over by tha AA.

As to meeting the wrong people in the first place, how's that work if you've never met them? Do you suggest we have a pre social for all party invites? Was checking amazon and ebay, no crystal balls available!

Not at all.

As for 'smug and condescending' ? No. Just honest I'm afraid.

If someone is being stood up and let down 'numerous times' then something is going wrong.

Is it likely to be that purely by coincidence on each occasion the other party has an emergency or something crops up that prevents them from sending a simple quick message?

Unlikely.

And yes. If you've checked recent veris and spoke on the phone, then bar a social what more can you do? Probably nothing. But how many that have frequent issues actually speak on the phone, because I suspect the majority don't.

Regarding my 'meeting the wrong people' comment? I meant trying to meet. Again, it comes down to up front communications. If you're relying on just messages to complete strangers and hoping they are who they say and that they'll turn up as promised then unfortunately that's a tad naive.

Some people are their own worst enemies when trying to arrange meets. There's much you can do to help yourself and equally much that will hinder.

But the fact remains. If the issues are frequent, regular and ongoing with multiple attempted meets not happening, then there's only one consistent element to that pattern.

A

Basically you're saying, all us folk who are let down, it's our fault. The multiple threads on here about no shows, suggest to me,its a fab wide phenomenon involving fantasists with incredibly bad manners. Do let all of us into your secret for not getting no shows. We all should know that when a message is unread and deleted or read with no reply, that they're not interested but when they do reply and are very enthusiastic about a meet, how is it naive to be disappointed when they don't show and a no 'sorry, something has come up' message received.

Basically? No. I didn't say any of that.

Are there fakes and fantasists on here? Of course.

Are there profiles that you should perhaps be more suspicious of than others? Most definitely. A quick scroll up and down this thread and I can see some that I'd be 100% confident were genuinely active site members and others.....perhaps less so.

Do all people do as much as they could to minimise the risk of getting duped? No. There are endless threads where people are shocked when they're stood up when all they have done is exchanged messages and photos online. People complain that contact stops, yet they still travel to a planned meet only to find moody there.

As for a 'sorry somethings come up' message? People are entitled to change their minds, right up to a proposed meet. That's their right. It happens for all manner of reasons.

But no. Not once have I said everyone is to blame for a cancelled meet or a no show. Read what I wrote again. SOME people don't help themselves and leave themselves wide open to being catfished. Some people also do or

say something that causes others to reconsider.

Fab is nothing more than a contact site that enables people to engage with eachother. It offers no guarantees. It doesn't babysit or hand hold people through messages and meets. We're all adults capable of managing our own interactions and expectations.

It's naive to think that on the internet on a site where you're dealing with total strangers, that each and every interaction will have a perfect outcome and you'll never be let down.

Again. If no shows and cancellations are a regular, frequent occurrence and messages and conversations lead to nothing, then there is only one common denominator.

A

Go on, say the common denominator, so that we all can see what you mean.

It's obvious, no?

If I were to be repeatedly let down, find myself catfished and duped by people pretending to be what they're not, had meets constantly cancelled from all manner of different profiles and was finding myself suddenly ghosted, ignored or blocked after days, weeks or months of messaging someone?

The only constant would be me.

A

I knew all along you meant us and your still skirting around it by your answer. So, to all those on fab who experience no shows, it's our fault. Exactly what I said, that you said, twice. Your fluffy comment that it's you is just an indirect way of telling us all, we're not worthy of meeting.

Nice attempt to twist my words again.

For the final time. If someone is consistently, frequently, regularly, on an ongoing basis - or whatever word/words you choose to use - being let down, messed around or stood up then what is the single, solitary, one and only constant in the equation?

I have not once said anyone isn't worth meeting. I have not once said that those to whom it happens once or twice, or on rare occasions, are to blame.

Maybe go back and read the words I typed. All of them. Then maybe you'll see the point I'm making.

Because so far it seems to be going over the heads of some.

But hey. Its not my concern at all. Happy fabbing.

A"

So you base your opinion on what scientific data? A bit rich when only 2 of your verifications cannot be attributed to a club or party. We would have 100 percent success rate if we had a club here. Why are you assuming that every meet we organise, we're stood up! No other contributer has stated that either. It's a fact that many fall prey to no shows. To generalise that everyone on fab who is stood up, need to have a introspective of what they're doing wrong is pure shinola.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got let down in such a big way , twice by the same woman we was talking vid calls , first meet was on my way she said she had to take her mum to hospital so that’s cool I turn back , 2nd time she actually sent me to the someone else address early hours of the morning , was so embarrassing and cruel she ghosted me after that one .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It baffles me why people are all excited full of a meeting then total let down I'm never late never mind not turning up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

I’ve had a read through the thread and I’d like to add a few points.

It is exceptionally rare for there to be people on here that haven’t been let down, sometimes on numerous occasions. It happens to pretty much everyone genuine on here at one point or another.

If it is continually happening then it really is time to look at yourself as to why it is happening, as Obi_Fox has mentioned.

This isn’t saying that YOU are the problem, obviously the no shows are the actual problem, what IS on you though is the way you are selecting people that you’re agreeing to meet.

It may be that you’re too trusting of people so fall for one of the countless fake profiles or fantasists that make up a large proportion of the site.

If you’ve been let down, it can be tempting to possibly loosen your standards a little so that you can find a meet… but this is exactly the wrong thing to do. You actually need to be more thorough and more selective with your potential meets. Insist on plenty of dialogue beforehand, have a social meet first policy, be extremely mindful of verifications (and who has left them!), build a rapport….

Ultimately you can try everything and there will still be the odd outlier that will let you down anyway, but being picky will bring better rewards.

If it keeps happening it’s down to you, not because of who you are or what you look like, but because you’re picking poorly

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

I must be lucky in that I've never had a no show during the decade that I've been on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Why are you still going on? I obviously said I thought that comment was a put-down. You are not being honest you are attempting to bully and it comes across as if you have no social skills whatsoever. Read the room mate, your comments are not wanted.

The fact that you come back and start asking yourself questions shows your own intent.

The fact that you are writing so much also shows that you are very very lonely.

I will give you points on writing but you come across as rude, condescending, arrogant, ignorant, and quite honestly a bully. Having great grammar is awesome but not being able to communicate in a socially acceptable manner makes you look silly. I don't like silly men. Please leave this thread."

If you press reply and quote then it will help others see who you are responding to ..I think a couple of people on this thread have taking what I thought was constructive advice and made it a personal attack on them and I really don’t think it was meant that way.

We’ve never had a no show but that’s due to us and the way we use fab .Sites like these are full of fantasists and time wasters so for us we decided the best way to by pass all the bullshit was to only meet people at organised group socials.

If we chat to people on here and we like them we will let them know what socials we will be at if they turn up great we can get to know them better if not then we are surrounded by great people we can meet and we have a great night out.

We don’t swap pictures with random people and we only have people we have met through socials on our friends list that way atleast we know these people are actually who they say they are which is always a great start .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uriousblondwifeCouple
over a year ago

wickford

3 or 4 times now! Mrs chatting to them, all going well, arrange a meet then a day before...profile gone!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

[Removed by poster at 28/03/23 16:21:42]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

while i agree some will get let down there are others who meet outside of clubs or socials that dont get let down ..as i said further up the page i cannot remember the last time i got let down and ive been on this scene 30 years yes there were some in the beginning but the last 10 years i cant remember any so just as there are many who get let down there are many who dont for what ever reason ...and on our couples profile we meet regularly ...so dont put us all in the same box many many of us do not get let down ..

why well thats a different subject

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

No as I only attend clubs. I trust no one

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

I've spent the day making myself and my place nice, getting in the mood, just for people not to show up! 2 supposedly on their way... All who I'd already met for a social. So yes, it happens.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Yes, it happens

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankfully I've never been let down in all the years I've been on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Thankfully I've never been let down in all the years I've been on here.

"

Yes same. Ish. I'm not sure I've been let down before. Maybe. Who knows.

I think though, it can be a crappy feeling and make you a bit cynical/wary about it. Try and not let it affect future interactions though but do give yourself time to be a bit fucked off x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *amLaraCroftWoman
over a year ago

London

I can usually tell when someone isn’t serious about meeting as they don’t initiate time and place details

They text about sex and ask for pics

I always meet in kestrels and make no bones about meeting more than one person on the same day this is swinging and group play

So if one or two slip my radar I still have other meets plus my regulars at kestrels

One guy texted me today after three weeks of radio silence and didn’t even acknowledge he let me down three weeks ago

He says he wants to meet

So cool I will be at kestrels club on Sunday if he meets he meets me if not I have other meets that are more reliable and seem less likely to bail last minute xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So frustrating when as a single guy we are fighting to gain some attention and opportunity

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

It does amaze me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uncouple 321Couple
over a year ago

south West

Amazes us to , been let down loads of times

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *yesbeenopened2Couple
over a year ago

Rugby

We had one incredibly frustrating situation where we arranged to meet a guy at a hotel in the early afternoon. We messaged him in the morning to confirm and then my wife spent a lot of the day ‘preparing’ herself. We thought the guy would be reliable because my wife had played with him in a club a few months before.

We had literally pulled into the hotel car park when he messaged to say his ‘car had broke down’. Fuming!

All’s well that ends well though: we ended up using the hotel room anyway and got some great pics (and a video) some of which are on our profile.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ancs29Man
over a year ago

oldham

This happens allot in here had one the other night looking for guys to met as he is out work message asked to see pics she said nice i like when can i come round now yes asked were no reply i said dont tell me how do i know where to come stopped reading messages they sound interested then block its so frustrating i am very genuine guy anyone invites me i will be there in a heart beet no let down seems poeple get taken in with all the bull shit some guys put up on there profile and dont give the right guys consideration less let downs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sheer madness men on here sound so flakey! Given how hard I find it to even get a women to reply I'd never let one down!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some men and women get off on the messaging alone. I’ve had men text to say “leaving now see you in 15 mins” then never show…! Happens a lot.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *amieLDN22Man
over a year ago

London

That's the nature of the game. A lot of people on here have a problem keeping up with appointments and sticking to their word. I like to get in my car and drive as far away as possible but covering long distances for someone has its cons. That's why I will travel less for meets and focus my attention to parties.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

To set things in perspective, this sort of post is a regular. I cannot blame anyone for being disappointed and letting off steam on here, over 'no shows'. Its only natural to seek empathy among people with similar experiences. No one said it happens every time but I'd wager the vast majority of 'genuine' people have had it happen to them, more than once

The rub comes whenever Peter perfect, says in a roundabout way, we're not vetting correctly, we're choosing the wrong people, we can't decyher the signs in their profile correctly. Now, im not in possession of any official data but along with our own and by the numerous topics, past and present, on the matter, its a fair assumption to make its a continuing problem. Ill sign off and in the same spirit with a question.

Q. Have you ever been let down on a planned meeting?

My reply to if you said 'no'

Is 'then you know f××× all about it

Ill be barred for this i bet. Its only Northern Ireland humour!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eanorWoman
over a year ago

?

Yep we do , all chat and no …….. lol xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andyh78Man
over a year ago

manchester


"To set things in perspective, this sort of post is a regular. I cannot blame anyone for being disappointed and letting off steam on here, over 'no shows'. Its only natural to seek empathy among people with similar experiences. No one said it happens every time but I'd wager the vast majority of 'genuine' people have had it happen to them, more than once

The rub comes whenever Peter perfect, says in a roundabout way, we're not vetting correctly, we're choosing the wrong people, we can't decyher the signs in their profile correctly. Now, im not in possession of any official data but along with our own and by the numerous topics, past and present, on the matter, its a fair assumption to make its a continuing problem. Ill sign off and in the same spirit with a question.

Q. Have you ever been let down on a planned meeting?

My reply to if you said 'no'

Is 'then you know f××× all about it

Ill be barred for this i bet. Its only Northern Ireland humour!"

Yep. Glad you posted this. I posted something similar a few weeks ago and all the Peter/penny perfects hit me left right and center with abuse. The best bit of it was half of them immediately blocked me so I couldn’t respond to their abuse.

Not long after that I thought I had met the perfect couple. Kindred spirits in the world of having their time wasted and being ghosted or blocked. I thought at least they won’t ghost or block me if they change their minds afterwards. We met, had a good time, they met someone else and then ghosted and blocked me. No better than the people we had both grumbled about.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

No wonder us blokes can’t get a reply never mind a meet if you ladies are getting let down so much. To be honest you all look amazing and I can’t beleive you have this trouble

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *evonrobMan
over a year ago

Kingsbridge


"Basically, you are saying I am the problem, thanks for the confidence boost.

I really needed that put down today "

If people are letting YOU down they are inadequate idiots! Cant see the point of being on here if you’re going to get as far as meeting someone then “ bottle it” - I should be so lucky!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *acky RacersCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Yes, women get let down too. Penelope has a single profile and arranged socials with two couples. They were keen as mustard then went quiet for a few days. Then the excuse. This has happened twice now and the profile is only 2 months old. I suppose behind every couple there are an immense amount of dynamics going on....Added to the fact that a lot of sole partners may drive a couple profile and when they mention it to the other half, the veto kicks in.....Just a theory of course!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yep we do , all chat and no …….. lol xx"

You’ve been let down and the guy hasn’t shown up..?!

They must need their head testing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

OP perhaps the people you are talking to become insensed when your fb talks to them from your account

If youre genuinely looking to learn from this without feeling judged try to keep the phrase 'fool me once shame on you .. fool me twice shame one' in mind

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *otbeefandonionsCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate

We've had it with a couple we met a few times. The last time we met them ended up with them having a very awkward domestic in our living room.

We then decided to cool it for a bit but they were still keen to meet so we arranged a Sunday afternoon meet. They confirmed at 9am on the day. Then cancelled at 1130. I just tried not to overthink it, just chalked it up to experience and Mr and I decided we just wouldn't arrange to meet them again

It's tough though cause you do start questioning yourself

Because of the awkward domestic and the cancellation, we now meet in clubs 100% of the time

Means if you get stood up or cat fished there are plenty more options

I'm sorry for anyone that has been stood up. Its nothing but sheer rudeness x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

You say awkward domestic. They might see it as following the swinger code and communicating clearly and honestly

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *otbeefandonionsCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate


"You say awkward domestic. They might see it as following the swinger code and communicating clearly and honestly "

Noooo, definitely was an awkward domestic

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exylovingcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Uxbridge

I find this thread really disappointing. There are some amazing women an here and all women are beautiful in my opinion. Come on guys treat them with respect, it’s not difficult.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

I’d never struggled up until last weekend. I was away in Jersey and got chatting to someone eho was very personable, attractive- the whole package. Wasted hours chatting and building up to meet later in the evening (and ignoring/declining other offers) AND HE NEVER TURNED UP…

And I was so horny haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he James gangCouple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I’d never struggled up until last weekend. I was away in Jersey and got chatting to someone eho was very personable, attractive- the whole package. Wasted hours chatting and building up to meet later in the evening (and ignoring/declining other offers) AND HE NEVER TURNED UP…

And I was so horny haha "

.

What a fool that man was!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *yesbeenopened2Couple
over a year ago

Rugby


"We've had it with a couple we met a few times. The last time we met them ended up with them having a very awkward domestic in our living room.

We then decided to cool it for a bit but they were still keen to meet so we arranged a Sunday afternoon meet. They confirmed at 9am on the day. Then cancelled at 1130. I just tried not to overthink it, just chalked it up to experience and Mr and I decided we just wouldn't arrange to meet them again

It's tough though cause you do start questioning yourself

Because of the awkward domestic and the cancellation, we now meet in clubs 100% of the time

Means if you get stood up or cat fished there are plenty more options

I'm sorry for anyone that has been stood up. Its nothing but sheer rudeness x"

I’d say it was more to do with their domestic than the attraction to you. You look like a very attractive couple.

My wife also started questioning herself when we were let down by a guy… until we went to the Hot Wife Club at Libs a few weeks later and guys were lining up for her!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Frequently. So now I don't agree to social meets unless in already going to be in the area anyway.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been lucky and not once have I been let down. I am very suss on working people out though and sorting the fakes from the genuine people.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't know if it's just me but I have been let down numerous times now, the last couple I met had relationship issues and then refused to leave a verification and when trying to meet ts people they have just led me on and canceled/ghosted. It is getting frustrating. Please tell me I am not the only lady on here being constantly let down? Don't get me started on the ones who say I sound like a man in messages lmao. Someone stroke my ego and make me feel better. Ladies what are you meet horror stories?"

We arranged for 3 guys to turn up for a dogging session and not one showed up.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ancs29Man
over a year ago

oldham

God what is wrong with people on fab when you are lucky enough to get an arranged meet do not let them down this is for the both ways i have not had a lot of luck have to say but if i did get an offer of a meet up i def would meet so please do not let them pis you off there are genuine guys out there like myself that are looking to get that offer.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alot of fake profiles and not genuine people on here unfortunately. I've been cancelled on a few times I find couples to be more flakey than single men or single women.

X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exylovingcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Uxbridge


"Yes! Just last night I was let down. I got ready had a little black dress on with underwear took a pic and sent it to the guy and he didn't show "

Well he is an idiot then.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know which is more frustrating.. .. getting all dolled up and getting ghosted or getting dolled up and having an unsatisfying meet ...

I find myself less inclined to meet anyone on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire


"Some men and women get off on the messaging alone. I’ve had men text to say “leaving now see you in 15 mins” then never show…! Happens a lot. "

Had that off a woman last time I was here.

She did all the chasing, messages flowed for weeks, hotel booked and she messaged saying she was on the way then blocked.

Tbh from what I've seen she's a bit messed up so I dodged one

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uffetgourmetCouple
over a year ago

penzance

We get the same..all shits and giggles till you go on down the road..its frustrating but I think perhaps people like the fantasy but when it's show up time reality hits..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *H dom subMan
over a year ago

worthing

Always amazed when guys no show. The ratio of men to women here, you’d think when a guys got a meet arranged he’d definitely show!

I was trying to set up a d/s mff or mmf with my sub near Cardiff, had 6 guys no show in a single day, only 2 guys turned up, couldn’t believe it!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

I fortunately never been let down , also tend to always meet people that i have met already and they have become more as a very close friends group . I do know some people can feel intimidated with the word clubs but are always great places to arrange meetings as if someone is being let down can always enjoy the atmosphere that sometimes can be positively surprising

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *herryEatersCouple
over a year ago

East Cheshire

Yes frequently and it's getting much worse, almost every contact we make now

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire


"Yes frequently and it's getting much worse, almost every contact we make now "

Shame you look fun people.

Try to remain positive

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are men on here really standing up women when a meet is arranged?? I find that extraordinary considering the membership on here is marjority male and to the men who stand women up, why do you do it??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *herryEatersCouple
over a year ago

East Cheshire


"Yes frequently and it's getting much worse, almost every contact we make now

Shame you look fun people.

Try to remain positive "

Thanks, we're trying !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *herryEatersCouple
over a year ago

East Cheshire


"Are men on here really standing up women when a meet is arranged?? I find that extraordinary considering the membership on here is marjority male and to the men who stand women up, why do you do it??"

Many are just fantasists, browsing the site behind their partners backs..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire


"Yes frequently and it's getting much worse, almost every contact we make now

Shame you look fun people.

Try to remain positive

Thanks, we're trying ! "

Do. Look good to me and I'm sure others as well

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find it unbelievable that certain men on here dont show up on a meet when its arranged while someone like me still can't even get a meet yet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top