FabSwingers.com forum: “Pushing Boundaries”

By *ogerroger69 OP Man
over a year ago

West Yorks

Swinging is all about pushing our sexual boundaries and eroding often them. What boundaries have you broken whilst swinging? All welcome to message x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

My boundaries are there for a reason I don't want them broken or pushed. I'm happy for my 'interested in trying ' list to be explored though

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By *owbadisbadMan
over a year ago

Sleaford / Grantham

First gangbang I went to was pushing my boundaries! But I'd love to repeat that again sometime soon. I would also like to push my boundaries with a sexy TS/TV, the more comfortable I get being around naked men will only see where and what I can do within myself! I am tempted and mentally it's exciting, but not knowing what would happen 'face to face' so to speak fills me with nerves, and what if the nerves got the better of me! The thought of being able to slide into a man's arse is alluring, but as I said it really is pushing my boundaries as I'm attracted to women. Ideal scenario play with a couple and with a lady present and keeping things 'going' go from there....

Sound selfish don't I haha

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

My boundaries exist because I know what I enjoy and where the line for things not being fun any more is. I don't like anyone pushing my boundaries when they exist for a reason

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

"Swinging is all about pushing our sexual boundaries and eroding often them. What boundaries have you broken whilst swinging? All welcome to message x"

Swinging is certainly not "all about pushing boundaries". It's about fulfilling sexual fantasies and, for couples, sharing sexual enjoyment. Most people have their boundaries and have no intention of pushing them. They provide a framework that ensures their swinging remains safe. If you want to push your boundaries they are not really boundaries at all, but just a fantasy or kink that you're slightly apprehensive about.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

"My boundaries are there for a reason I don't want them broken or pushed. I'm happy for my 'interested in trying ' list to be explored though"

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By *ersuasion22Couple
over a year ago

Herts

I guess we started off with stricter boundaries, and over time they have changed or we've re-evaluated things. We also have different boundaries for different people that we play with. My boundaries with someone we've played with a few times are different to those with someone I've just met.

I think for us they are something that will continue to evolve. I like to push my own boundaries sometimes,and either go yes that was fun or no thanks, not for me!

- Mrs P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's clumsy language from the OP but I think I get his point.

I think what he means is how is your sexual evolutionary journey changing?

The term 'pushing boundaries' is really missing the point about what boundaries & consent are, why they exist, and why they're so important. Language is nuanced and a lot of people on here mis-use certain terms but with their heart in the right place I find.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

My boundaries are there for a reason, not to be pushed aside.

Mrs

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

You may want to experiment more when your swinging fantasy experiences have been met. But boundaries may still be in place.

I like so BDSM play but not to the extreme levels I know what I like and enjoy, so prefer to keep it that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This phrase gets a insta block when it's uttered in my inbox.

My boundaries are not to be pushed. They're there for a reason. Exploring what I'm into is different to pushing boundaries.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

None.

My boundaries are well considered and are based on my wants, needs, vulnerabilities etc.

Anyone who wants to push my boundaries is someone I will never meet.

I'll expand my horizons, maybe. But "I want to experience more things" is not the same as "I want to be pushed past places I said I wouldn't go past"

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By *lirtyAndFunCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

I'd only ever had a little vibrator, now I have a little selection of various toys.

Ive also grown to like my arse being slapped hard, neck being grabbed & hair pulled.

Multiple guys at once, facials (I used to hate it)

I like the idea of restraints now & light BDSM.

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By *andycandy88Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

My post got removed so sorry OP I am not able to answer your post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What absolute tosh

Would not say his, her or our swinging experience is about pushing boundaries and usually a bit of a red flag when we read it on profiles and status updates.

Others have boundaries for a very good reason and people should respect that. What you do with your personal one's is up to you but generally a spoilt venture if someone thinks it's a good idea to push or mess with either of our boundaries.

Swinging is really about consent and willingness to satisfy others in a sexual nature

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sensitive subject this is (best Yoda voice).

If no one here ever expanded their limits this would be a very closeted environment. I for one am very happy to belong to one of the most open minded group of people Ive ever met

There's a huge difference between in your head boundaries that you want to work on and fixed firm and thoroughly communicated DO NOT DO things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me, 'playfully' testing limits -- or encouraging someone to test their limits in a safe environment is fine if there's chemistry and understanding.

That could mean trying things because you want to, but are cautious, nervous etc. Or it could be having a fantasy about giving up control to someone else who will push you.

I *think* that's what most people mean by pushing boundaries in this context -- at least it's what I mean.

However, pushing, nagging or coercing someone to do something they're not into and will never be into, that's a different thing entirely.

If you want something, and they don't want it under any circumstances, then you are with the wrong person.

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

my boundaries are there for a reason push them and you could be accused of sexual assault ..fact

so my boundaries only change if i/we agree before hand to try something we are all adults talk consent and then enjoy .... i alway find when a guy (guys because i only meet guys) says he want to push my boundaries its a no go cause it shows they dont have control

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By *unsexual MemelordWoman
over a year ago

Midlothian

"This phrase gets a insta block when it's uttered in my inbox.

My boundaries are not to be pushed. They're there for a reason. Exploring what I'm into is different to pushing boundaries."

Ditto. Seeing 'I love to push boundaries' or similar on a profile is an instant turn-off.

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By *atureFem4FunWoman
over a year ago

Petts Wood

"my boundaries are there for a reason push them and you could be accused of sexual assault ..fact

You could accuse someone of sexual assault but you'd struggle to get a conviction unfortunately

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

"To me, 'playfully' testing limits -- or encouraging someone to test their limits in a safe environment is fine if there's chemistry and understanding.

That could mean trying things because you want to, but are cautious, nervous etc. Or it could be having a fantasy about giving up control to someone else who will push you.

I *think* that's what most people mean by pushing boundaries in this context -- at least it's what I mean.

However, pushing, nagging or coercing someone to do something they're not into and will never be into, that's a different thing entirely.

If you want something, and they don't want it under any circumstances, then you are with the wrong person.

This.

Personally I prefer to say that I invite people to expand their boundaries, or I create circumstances such that expanding their boundaries gets enthusiastic consent. But that is in a kink dynamic.

Not forgetting that many profiles state they want their boundaries pushed which ties in with Midnight Mischief's comments.

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By *anda and CatCouple
over a year ago

We started off with strict boundaries, with 2 people they often get stretched, more a case in the begining of the other person setting the boundaries for the other. I would say our boundaries are totally different now and will probably change some more. If we cross one it's a lesson and we learn from it, in a good or bad way. It either expands them or re-enforces them.

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By *astesLikeMagicWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Swinging is all about pushing our sexual boundaries and eroding often them. What boundaries have you broken whilst swinging? All welcome to message x"

I disagree

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By *itty HoodooCouple
over a year ago

Stockport

"Swinging is all about pushing our sexual boundaries and eroding often them. What boundaries have you broken whilst swinging? All welcome to message x"

And this is why single men complain about no responses. Not a mention of the second and especially third person, just pure immature, self serving and narcissistic attitude. I’m sure you will say you’re doing well. Keep telling yourself that sweetheart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This phrase gets a insta block when it's uttered in my inbox.

My boundaries are not to be pushed. They're there for a reason. Exploring what I'm into is different to pushing boundaries.

Ditto. Seeing 'I love to push boundaries' or similar on a profile is an instant turn-off.

Same.

The phrase gives me the creeps. I have become more confident, liberated , free, and having more fun since swinging. But boundary pushing, no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Straight to block for us.

Pushing our boundaries is read as not respecting our decision to say no.

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

"my boundaries are there for a reason push them and you could be accused of sexual assault ..fact

You could accuse someone of sexual assault but you'd struggle to get a conviction unfortunately "

are you suggesting that victims should not report ?? ill take my chance thanks last thing we need is people thinking they cvn get away with these abuse's ..

ive dealt with the police twice before over stalking both times sorted and with all these new laws and there being a push to sort sexual abuse ill take my chance and report it ...and i urge anyone else to do the same ...we dont need people telling people there no point ...no wonder so many dont take things further ...

people have bounderies for reasons and it down to them to enforce them unless they wish a change then of couse its consented ..nothing more important on this scene than consent and thats for everyone not just women

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By *educing_EmCouple
over a year ago

Tipperary

"It's clumsy language from the OP but I think I get his point.

I think what he means is how is your sexual evolutionary journey changing?

This is what I took the post to mean also.

When we joined here I was very self conscious and felt that my body wasn't desirable enough despite my husband telling me on a daily basis that it was(I was sure he had rose tinted glasses on).

For that reason I was very reserved in what I was comfortable with but now I'm more brazen than I ever imagined I would be,doing things I didn't even know I would like.

Confidence is an empowering thing and I'm very happy to say I have it now.

Boundaries are a completely different thing and the only person who has the right to push them is yourself.

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By *iking67Man
over a year ago

BP Auckland

My boundary was broken when the m in a m/f couple asked if he could suck my cock during the heat of the moment and my answer was a breathless yes please do.

Never looked back from that moment

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By *armale69Man
over a year ago

warrington

"My boundary was broken when the m in a m/f couple asked if he could suck my cock during the heat of the moment and my answer was a breathless yes please do.

Never looked back from that moment

Same thing happened to me. Though not sure he asked

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"It's clumsy language from the OP but I think I get his point.

I think what he means is how is your sexual evolutionary journey changing?

This is what I took the post to mean also.

When we joined here I was very self conscious and felt that my body wasn't desirable enough despite my husband telling me on a daily basis that it was(I was sure he had rose tinted glasses on).

For that reason I was very reserved in what I was comfortable with but now I'm more brazen than I ever imagined I would be,doing things I didn't even know I would like.

Confidence is an empowering thing and I'm very happy to say I have it now.

Boundaries are a completely different thing and the only person who has the right to push them is yourself.

100% this

You are more than entitled to push your own boundaries, choose to evolve them, experiment and look to experience new things - how do you develop and learn what interests/excites you otherwise?

I too think the OP may have used confusing language.

If, of course, they were referring to ousting the boundaries of others as some seem to feel then yes - 100% wrong and shows a fundamental lack of understanding re respect, swinging in general and the key principle of abiding by others boundaries and preferences.

But I for one have tried to get out of my comfort zone in a variety of ways whilst experimenting with my sexuality and interests a number of times. How else would I learn about myself and establish what will always be strict boundaries and what are simply preferences and interests that I may be willing to axperience with some, but not all people I encounter?

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By *Xtriple7Couple
over a year ago

N Peterborough.

We only ever push boundaries by our mutual consent.

If guys or couples try to push boundaries or play games by saying one thing to Mr then another to Mrs or wait til Mr leaves room to make a move on Mrs then we've never met them again.

We've pushed from voyeur meets to hosting our own gangbang. Explored our bi side (or lack there of) too.

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