FabSwingers.com forum: Struggling with compliments

By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

I know that this will look like a look at me thread but it's not at all especially as no dick pics on my profile.

But on Friday while at a club I was lucky enough to find myself in a room with a very very lovely lady. Anyway as we're getting on with things she comments on how nice and big my cock is. Now this is the issue, this has been said before by other women..... But I've always struggled with this compliment as

1) I don't believe it.

2) I get embarrassed by it.

The strange thing is since staring the swinging lifestyle my body confidence has improved a lot but still cannot accept a compliment.

Does anyone else have this issue? How do you change your mindset to accept compliments?

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

Took me a long time, but I think I’m getting better with this - and it’s largely due to hanging out here on Fab.

I found it easier to accept compliments as part of longer conversations. If I know a girl, and I trust her, even admire her … then why shouldn’t I believe her when she gives me a compliment? Why wouldn’t she mean it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your belief, or not, isn't the issue. A lady (or gentleman) took the social risk of complimenting you. Assuming that wasn't a completely unwanted advance it behoves you to get over yourself and thank them. "That's kind of you to say" is the message - although "I like your x" is also a way to divert attention back to more comfortable subject matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep … this sounds like me

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

"1) I don't believe it.

2) I get embarrassed by it."

I hear you.

As for body confidence, I figure this is it, live with it. If it’s not for them it’s not for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to be comfortable in your own skin. Some will love you, some will not. Just enjoy life and make the most of every opportunity

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"Your belief, or not, isn't the issue. A lady (or gentleman) took the social risk of complimenting you. Assuming that wasn't a completely unwanted advance it behoves you to get over yourself and thank them. "That's kind of you to say" is the message - although "I like your x" is also a way to divert attention back to more comfortable subject matter.

Pretty much what I done to be honest. I just struggle with compliments. That was just one example, I struggle with non body/appendage compliments too.

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By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

I dont believe compliments on fab if im honest...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont believe compliments on fab if im honest...

This. I take 'compliments' from horned-up people as worthless

I've found everyday/no agenda/rare compliments from women to be real and have really appreciated them

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I dont believe compliments on fab if im honest...

Oh likewise however this was in person, so adds to the embarrassment (pathetic I know)

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I dont believe compliments on fab if im honest...

This. I take 'compliments' from horned-up people as worthless

I've found everyday/no agenda/rare compliments from women to be real and have really appreciated them"

I couldn't really say as I don't often get compliments from horned up people pmsl. However you are right usually from a woman I do appreciate it more, probably because I don't get many compliments so the one I do get semm more genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Practice OP and I promise it will get easier.

When someone next pays you a compliment pause before you say anything, then a simple “Thank you”

It’s an attractive thing to be able to accept one and people will perceive you as being more confident than you maybe feel inside

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By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago

Fairytale Wood

"I dont believe compliments on fab if im honest...

Depends if you know and trust the orig of compliment, but generally i agree i wouldn't believe 98.5% of the compliments here.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Practice OP and I promise it will get easier.

When someone next pays you a compliment pause before you say anything, then a simple “Thank you”

It’s an attractive thing to be able to accept one and people will perceive you as being more confident than you maybe feel inside

Agreed. Just smile and say "thank you".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got out of a domestic abuse marriage a few years ago now, and my ex emotionally and psychologically abused me to the point I almost took my own life.

Fast forward to now, Mr is basically my dream man and I can't imagine life with anyone else these days. He pays me compliments regularly, and I find it hard to believe them, even now after months and months of mental health support and counselling. I've never before sent so much as a nude to anyone, but now here I am posting sexy pics on the Internet for strangers to look at on Fab, and Mr gets off on the fact that other people find me attractive and sexy. If I get paid a compliment, I try and just smile and say thank you. I also try and tell myself that I am worthy, and deserving of the compliments. I know that's not easy, but just be patient with yourself

Mrs

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"Practice OP and I promise it will get easier.

When someone next pays you a compliment pause before you say anything, then a simple “Thank you”

It’s an attractive thing to be able to accept one and people will perceive you as being more confident than you maybe feel inside

Wow you certainly live up to your user name!

Yes this is what I done, it was nice to hear and said with sincerity, so not as embarrassed as I would normally be. Maybe I'm just getting better at receiving them.

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I got out of a domestic abuse marriage a few years ago now, and my ex emotionally and psychologically abused me to the point I almost took my own life.

Mrs"

Well I'm sure you don't need to hear it from me, but your ex is/was a c#@t. You really are stunning and you new fella is one very lucky guy, you are amazing and come across very confident.

Your last line about being worthy is spot on, and I do find it easier depending on what the compliment is about.

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By *r SmartypantsMan
over a year ago

London- Liverpool Street

I do agree some compliments can feel like loose words if they are random or by someone with their own objective.

But with the right context and sincerity, they can be energising, powerful and mentally mobilising and pleasing to both people.

Make the most of positive vibes when they feel real.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must be nice to get compliments lol

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"Must be nice to get compliments lol"

Oh believe me it really was, just not good at receiving them is all.

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By *xposedInTheSunCouple
over a year ago

Cambridgeshire

I don't understand why people care whether the compliment is genuine or not. If a woman says that you have a nice cock, the options are either that you have a nice cock, or that she likes you enough to exaggerate a bit.

Both are frankly wonderful. Given a choice I'd probably go for her liking me enough to exaggerate!

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I don't understand why people care whether the compliment is genuine or not. If a woman says that you have a nice cock, the options are either that you have a nice cock, or that she likes you enough to exaggerate a bit.

Both are frankly wonderful. Given a choice I'd probably go for her liking me enough to exaggerate!"

It's not that I like the compliment or not or if I care, I like most humans actually like compliments, what I struggle with is accepting the compliment, and not get embarrassed or feel some shame over it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say the wife suffers from body confidence, I tell her every day how beautiful she is.

Also just to add i believe many (not all) people have bits they'd like to change.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I struggle alot with compliments have done for a long time due to past relationships. My man complements me alot and I am starting to get better at receiving them from him. He always tells me he wishes I would see myself the way he does and maybe one day I will but for now it's a working progress.

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

London, South East & Europe

I understand this. When a woman compliments my cock I find it hard to believe her, probably because I'm conditioned to seeing huge ones in porn.

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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago

london stratford

I wish I had your problem

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I understand this. When a woman compliments my cock I find it hard to believe her, probably because I'm conditioned to seeing huge ones in porn."

There it is! That's exactly the issue I have with compliments about my cock, all I think is "have you not watched porn?"

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

WHEREVER I LAY MY HAT

"I understand this. When a woman compliments my cock I find it hard to believe her, probably because I'm conditioned to seeing huge ones in porn.

There it is! That's exactly the issue I have with compliments about my cock, all I think is "have you not watched porn?""

Newsflash: a lot of women on here aren't size queens wanting a cock the size of my forearm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know that this will look like a look at me thread but it's not at all especially as no dick pics on my profile.

Pic from 6 Aug 2020 ????

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Just smile and say thank you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I got out of a domestic abuse marriage a few years ago now, and my ex emotionally and psychologically abused me to the point I almost took my own life.

Mrs

Well I'm sure you don't need to hear it from me, but your ex is/was a c#@t. You really are stunning and you new fella is one very lucky guy, you are amazing and come across very confident.

Your last line about being worthy is spot on, and I do find it easier depending on what the compliment is about. "

That's really nice of you to say - thank you

Be kind to yourself and be patient with yourself, and things will get easier as your self confidence grows

Mrs

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By *ldFashionedGentMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

It takes 10 positive comments for ever negative one. And the negative things we say to ourselves can be just as harmful as from others.

Many people struggle to accept a compliment believing it to have an ulterior motive or simply not believing it. It’s something we should all work on where possible. As I like to think, most of the time, they’re simply coming from a good place

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"I know that this will look like a look at me thread but it's not at all especially as no dick pics on my profile.

Pic from 6 Aug 2020 ????"

I'd completely forgotten about that one. I honestly thought I'd taken all dick picks off seeing as most women don't want to see dick pics

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By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"You need to be comfortable in your own skin. Some will love you, some will not. Just enjoy life and make the most of every opportunity "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All i see this post has done is brought out all the guys with big dicks to come here and say the same they find it hard to take a compliment. Well im pleased for you all that youve been able to come out n say it. Me im a tiny dick dont get those compliments but have to accept that isnt going to change. Ohh to be able to not be comfortable with compliments about having a big dick !! hahaha move on please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find compliments really difficult too. I shrug them off ,challenge them at times or make a joke about them .

I've always been this way .

Yet I love nothing more than complimenting other people and in a sexual situation I want all the praise I can get.

Maybe I'm just odd.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I judge the nature of the compliment and the context in which they have arisen.

Sometimes they are just tasteless and pointless. Sometimes they are lovely and necessary.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve always deflected compliments, it does make me feel a little uncomfortable and I’m not sure why.

If someone says my hair looks nice, I’m like ‘oh god it’s normally a mess!’ If it’s a genuine compliment from family or friends then it’s lovely.

Often on fab it’s a lot of blowing smoke up your arse to try and get somewhere, so I take with a pinch of salt

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By *ympho6969Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

I think a lot of people are like this.

Strangely enough, I'm sort of the opposite. I can accept a compliment while naked, but if fully dressed and someone says I look pretty or beautiful, I just feel awkward

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By *illingdon_lad OP Man
over a year ago

Bicester

"All i see this post has done is brought out all the guys with big dicks to come here and say the same they find it hard to take a compliment. Well im pleased for you all that youve been able to come out n say it. Me im a tiny dick dont get those compliments but have to accept that isnt going to change. Ohh to be able to not be comfortable with compliments about having a big dick !! hahaha move on please."

It doesn't matter how much you compliment someone who struggles with compliments, the chances are they will not believe it.

The point of the post is about how to accept compliments not phishing for compliments about cocks

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