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Cheating partners, would you forgive?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its alot more circumstancial than that i recon. Who did they cheat with? How many times? What specifically did they do when meeting? What was their motivation?

Depending on these answers would depend wether i showed the door or gave them another chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yh would depend on the situation really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The door, regardless of what circumstance, that to me is not love.

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

No I wouldn't forgive. Hope your reading this Mr. Don't be getting any ideas!

X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if he made up for it by buying me lots of nice presants.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

Happened to me and she was totally remorseful!!

But only when I caught them and found out!

I walked!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if he made up for it by buying me lots of nice presants."

yet another instance of a woman willing to put up with anything for materialist nonsence.

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By *ugartitsandhimCouple
over a year ago

North West


"The door, regardless of what circumstance, that to me is not love."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if he made up for it by buying me lots of nice presants."

Maybe he should start with a dictionary lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheating is cheating regardless of the circumstances!!

I would show them the door!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

Don't see how someone can be 'totally' remorseful as that implies (to me) that there was no desire to cheat on their part... and, last time I checked, it takes two to tango...

My ex was anything but remorseful.... which is why she's my ex....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The stupid neither forgive nor forget, the naive forgive and forget, the wise forgive but do not forget.

Wise words indeed.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It all depends on the circumstances but as swingers the sex bit is irrelavant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Simples - no way would it work , so show them the door to save the bullshit and further pain

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Its alot more circumstancial than that i recon. Who did they cheat with? How many times? What specifically did they do when meeting? What was their motivation?

Depending on these answers would depend wether i showed the door or gave them another chance"
Seconded

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

What do you class as 'cheating'??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

forgive her totally

then walk,, its a trust thing once thats gone

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

I did!! Lets hope he will be as charitable should the need arise.

I even kept quiet so we got over Xmas with the kids before I told him I knew.

I had known 2 months but didnt want to upset a very important visit to "inlaws" for my son .

Boy I had some fun with that women in the meantime !!

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By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

Wouldn't worry me.

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By *pl- capdagdeCouple
over a year ago

Cap d agde,France

Swinging is about trust and honesty. So If doing something like this together means they still need to go behind your back and cheat,then for me its the door !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

relationship would be over, id leave

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swinging is about trust and honesty. So If doing something like this together means they still need to go behind your back and cheat,then for me its the door !"

For some people going behind their partners back is all part of the 'game' so to speak. Swinging is different for everyone, it's hard to define.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

If it was a no strings shag, then yes I would forgive someone.

If it was a series of no strings shags, then again I would forgive.

If it was a deep and meaningful bond that had been going on for a prolonged period without my knowledge then yes, I would be upset.

However, that take is based purely on my personal set of circumstances.

Everyone elses circumstances may be different and there are instances when I think although unfortunate, even the latter scenario is not only acceptable but in some cases, required.

I don't believe there is a right or a wrong answer to this question and it is much easier for those with an acute moral compass to judge when they are sat on the outside looking in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swinging is about trust and honesty. So If doing something like this together means they still need to go behind your back and cheat,then for me its the door !

For some people going behind their partners back is all part of the 'game' so to speak. Swinging is different for everyone, it's hard to define."

The OP I believe is not referring to swinging, as yes technically I have performed an unfaithful act.

Couples who wish to meet alone, or arrange any other such scenario imo are still part of the swinging whether they are present or not.

Completely different from a partner sneaking off behind your back and you have no knowledge of it, until the tale tell signs appear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could and have forgiven this in the past. Would depend on circumstances though

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter


"I did!! Lets hope he will be as charitable should the need arise.

I even kept quiet so we got over Xmas with the kids before I told him I knew.

I had known 2 months but didnt want to upset a very important visit to "inlaws" for my son .

Boy I had some fun with that women in the meantime !! "

This was nothing to do with swinging..

He was meeting someone having an affair.

Always easy to say I would leave / walk out ..used to say it myself back in the days I cared.

Truth to say it no longer mattered that much. It ended so no point in breaking up. One just carries on as before.

My pleasure was the annoyance ! I caused at her work place makes me smile even now

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By *inktherapyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"The stupid neither forgive nor forget, the naive forgive and forget, the wise forgive but do not forget.

Wise words indeed....."

Very true

It is all too easy to say 'if they cheated I'd throw them out' Life's not as black and white as that. Until you have been in that position I don't think anyone can say an answer for sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex wife cheated with my so called best mate. I tried to forgive, she didnt appear to be remoursful.

Once the anti-depressants started working, I kicked her out & divorced her. Never seen or spoken to her since, 14 years ago.

Happily married for 10 years now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Each situation is unique to the couple, if it isn't unique then one of them is a fool. So only they can decide what to do next, and there is no way anyone else can judge the actions taken.

Personally if it was a d*unken one off shag no problem, if it was a long term ongoing relationship problem!

I do get confused about what is cheating, for some it's sending text messages, whilst for others it's a weekend in Paris.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if its only a shag then just get on with it,i would love my mrs to cheat on me.when 2 people get married your not supposed to have sex with anybody else but we all do swingers and non swingers sex is just a moment in time.

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By *autious CoupleCouple
over a year ago

home


"The stupid neither forgive nor forget, the naive forgive and forget, the wise forgive but do not forget.

Wise words indeed....."
very true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once a cheat always a cheat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As stated as you are swingers its not just a sex thing. Its an emotion thing. Cheating for me is when someone has emotions for someone else whether they act on it in the bedroom or simple act on it by txt. If it has emotions and feelings then for me that is cheating and not the actual act of sex as sex is simply just sex. He shows you no respect or love if he sneaks around. So sorry to hear theres no easy answer.

The line has been crossed and from my own experience that trust will never return.

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By *uriousBristolCplCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Don't be Bitter, Be Better

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I threw mine out, if he thinks its acceptable to be out screwing someone else while I'm at home cooking his dinner and taking care of our child then he can fuck off!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't be Bitter, Be Better "

Yep! If its the right thing to do - move on and live your life!

You only get one shot at it after all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All cheating partners will be remorseful. That they got found out....!

So they are really sorry it happened....? It didn't happen by accident. You can't accidentally fall on someone else's genitals. It takes planning to get with someone to have sex with them.

For me, I have learned that even supposedly 'happy' swinging couples cheat on each other. If people that are in a swinging relationship and 'allowed' to have sex with other people, then still go behind their partner's back and cheat.... Well how can anyone seriously believe that anyone would be faithful in any kind of relationship?!?!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No I wouldn't forgive. Hope your reading this Mr. Don't be getting any ideas!

X"

Ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As stated as you are swingers its not just a sex thing. Its an emotion thing. Cheating for me is when someone has emotions for someone else whether they act on it in the bedroom or simple act on it by txt. If it has emotions and feelings then for me that is cheating and not the actual act of sex as sex is simply just sex. He shows you no respect or love if he sneaks around. So sorry to hear theres no easy answer.

The line has been crossed and from my own experience that trust will never return."
Completely agree with this post. When someone recognises their action will hurt the person they're supposed to care about and continues with their selfish behaviour til caught. Then there's no going back in my opinion.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"The stupid neither forgive nor forget, the naive forgive and forget, the wise forgive but do not forget.

Wise words indeed....."
Only just saw this gem - well put

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

yes and i did

we have since split up but nothing to do with cheating

as i was also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No matter the situations, no matter what they say, how "out of it" they were.

No, never forgive, never forget.

Honour and Loyalty, no excuses.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I always wonder what constitutes "cheating" - as somebody said earlier for some people a "text or cyber affair" is as bad as having sex with somebody else.

So where would people draw the line?

PS I chuckled at Scarlet's "you cannot fall on somebody's genitals" - just visualising this one. Sorry, I know it is a serious topic but that did make me laugh

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Once a cheat always a cheat."

disagree, people can and do change various aspects about their personality..

for some with age comes maturity and wisdom..

being able to look at oneself, warts and all then act upon what you may find is something not many 20 somethings may want or be capable of doing..

add 20+ years and the person may have changed for the better..

its all dependant on the individual circumstances..

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

I was cheated on hence my post last nite about revenge. It had been goin on for mths started through the internet. He lied so much tryin to make out it was my imaganation deceided to tell me on my 40th. I bought him a 1 way ticket to newcastle. Then got my revenge which he still doesn't know about. Then last year I found out he was textin my sis etc. She told him where to go but didn't tell me. Was 6 yrs ago I couldn't be happier than I am now

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire


"I always wonder what constitutes "cheating" - as somebody said earlier for some people a "text or cyber affair" is as bad as having sex with somebody else.

So where would people draw the line?

PS I chuckled at Scarlet's "you cannot fall on somebody's genitals" - just visualising this one. Sorry, I know it is a serious topic but that did make me laugh"

See it a bit like many things as a sort of a spectrum depending on the individuals, lifestyle, upbringing and even culture..

the circumstances will differ for many and the reaction will vary accordingly..

'we' in this aspect of our lives are seen by some in the vanilla world as living beyond the pale and their comprehension..

other folk live happily together for many many years with totally open marriages..

does beg the question just how monogamous are we as a species?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Once a cheat always a cheat."

That's not true,I cheated on my OH early in relationship, I had my reasons, we talked it through and he decided to forgive me.

I know how much I hurt him back then and took a long time for him to trust me again, but we worked through it and it actually made us stronger as a couple.

I know I would never cheat on him again, love him to bits and would never hurt him like that again x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes we both have.

It is situation dependant. If someone has a meaningful affair with emotions involved i don't think you could mend that easily if at all.

The situations we have found ourselves involved just sexual gratification. Hopefully we have both now learnt a lesson as it was still very hurtful, but at the end of the day we wouldn't throw away a ten year relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Once a cheat always a cheat.

That's not true,I cheated on my OH early in relationship, I had my reasons, we talked it through and he decided to forgive me.

I know how much I hurt him back then and took a long time for him to trust me again, but we worked through it and it actually made us stronger as a couple.

I know I would never cheat on him again, love him to bits and would never hurt him like that again x"

And this is exactly the case for me too - mrs notts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

End of! For me.

As a swinger, sex with others is on the table, however I will not live with dishonesty and without trust; there is simply no point.

I am that simple

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Swinging is about trust and honesty. So If doing something like this together means they still need to go behind your back and cheat,then for me its the door !

For some people going behind their partners back is all part of the 'game' so to speak. Swinging is different for everyone, it's hard to define.

The OP I believe is not referring to swinging, as yes technically I have performed an unfaithful act.

Couples who wish to meet alone, or arrange any other such scenario imo are still part of the swinging whether they are present or not.

Completely different from a partner sneaking off behind your back and you have no knowledge of it, until the tale tell signs appear."

I was referring to your partner being on a swing site without your knowledge ( or so they think !!) and actually meeting up with someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a cheat once a cheat always a cheat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would be the door for me, and no turning back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have cheated in every relationship I have had, mind you my first serious one started when i was 17 and ended just before I was 22, I cheated at the start of the relationship, I thought we were just going to be fuck buddies, didn't think it would get as far as it did (living together and engaged).

I dont believe in the saying once a cheat always a cheat, my other half cheated in the past on one of his ex gf's, but I know he would never do it to me, and I would never do it to him, we have such an open relationship, something we never got from being with our exes, and I think that is all part of what makes us so good together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Luckily for them both I found out about the 2 year affair after we'd split up. I found out on Facebook, my friend rang me to come over as she'd found it and she felt I needed to know. They went public on the Valentine's Day after we broke up and said it wasn't their first together but that it was their first public one now, "complications were out of the way"

Once a cheat always a cheat. Its why my profile says I don't play with married guys/women.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

wouldn't give it another thought... out the door......

as i said to the last person who cheated on me and wanted me to take them back "the last thing you were thinking about was me when you were having sex with them!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"wouldn't give it another thought... out the door......

as i said to the last person who cheated on me and wanted me to take them back "the last thing you were thinking about was me when you were having sex with them!""

I'm exactly the same, in my eyes you should be able to control yourself, even if you are d*unk. If someone cheats on you then something is wrong.

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By *ady4ladyWoman
over a year ago

liverpool

It would be over, immediatly.

Not just due to the act of cheating, but the act of lying too.

Some can fogive a 'mistake', but lying is not a mistake, its a deliberate act to conceal something because they know its wrong.

Sermon over

Good luck whatever the outcome.

xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could maybe forgive, but I could never forget so I'd have to walk as the relationship would be pretty much over anyway as the trust would be gone.

I don't understand those on the thread though that seem to think there is no difference between consensual swinging sex and sex without their partners knowledge though...to me there would be a huge difference. The act may be the same, but without you're other half knowing there is a least a possibility to me that would be cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It may sound a bit messed up but I may have been able to salvage something from the situation before we started swinging. The amount of trust that goes into getting into the things we do now would make it feel like far more of a kick in the teeth if it were to happen now (considering she is able to fuck other people anyway) and so I definitely wouldn't be able to move on now.

Good job we've never felt so in love and secure in our marriage as we do since getting into this lifestyle!

J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its happend to me Mr and i forgave but couldnt forget so i walked but to be honest the relationship wasnt great anyway so probally had walked anyway, this isnt a license for my other half to have a affair lol but i think i would forgive but not forget and in time hopefully put it to back of my mind, but like said all depends on with who, and how long. But we do trust eachother lots so once broken it might be hard, bloody hell i dont know and its not even happened to me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What if you think they may of but don't have the proof lol.

My ex cheated but confessed when i suspected something, he expected forgiveness... I walked away, it's the lying I can't stand.

Cheaters are the lowest of the low

Never want to feel like that ever again.

Littlebit

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I would never be in the position but I know myself well enough that I would ice cold and merciless...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not the forgiving type.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As in I wouldn't forgive cheating ... Damn phone! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would forgive depending on my feelings for said person. Someone did cheat on me in the past. I was ready to move on and forget, but she couldn't do it.

Maybe I'm just a fool.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Swinging is about trust and honesty. So If doing something like this together means they still need to go behind your back and cheat,then for me its the door !"
my ex wife cheated on me. Sneaking behind my back even phoning to ask how long I will be before returning from work. making out after I got back earlier than expected that she was at a friends having a brew ( phone was off for 2 hrs ) all that even though I said she could do anything as long as she told me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope...if they cheat once the trust would be completely gone..happened to me so I walked.

Fusion

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By *preadeagleCouple
over a year ago

hull


"Nope...if they cheat once the trust would be completely gone..happened to me so I walked.

Fusion"

totally agree thats why there are sites like this keep the spark and sharing is caring for both partner xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you found out your partner had cheated on you but was totally remorseful, would you forgive them or show them the door? Is everyone entitled to make one mistake? "

It depends on your individual circumstances. I found my ex had been cheating (not a one off) and confronted him and he lied to my face. He was not man enough to admit it, so within half an hour his bags were packed and he was out! Broke my heart, but no going back and I am so glad I did that now! Knob head is getting married Valentine's Day so good luck to her!! xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I did!! Lets hope he will be as charitable should the need arise.

I even kept quiet so we got over Xmas with the kids before I told him I knew.

I had known 2 months but didnt want to upset a very important visit to "inlaws" for my son .

Boy I had some fun with that women in the meantime !!

This was nothing to do with swinging..

He was meeting someone having an affair.

Always easy to say I would leave / walk out ..used to say it myself back in the days I cared.

Truth to say it no longer mattered that much. It ended so no point in breaking up. One just carries on as before.

My pleasure was the annoyance ! I caused at her work place makes me smile even now "

You see, I don't get this mentality. If my husband cheated on me, any repercussions would be heading HIS way! He's the one I exchanged vows with, he's the one that betrayed my trust.

The other woman owes me absolutely nothing, so why waste energy on her?

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"All cheating partners will be remorseful. That they got found out....!

So they are really sorry it happened....? It didn't happen by accident. You can't accidentally fall on someone else's genitals. It takes planning to get with someone to have sex with them.

For me, I have learned that even supposedly 'happy' swinging couples cheat on each other. If people that are in a swinging relationship and 'allowed' to have sex with other people, then still go behind their partner's back and cheat.... Well how can anyone seriously believe that anyone would be faithful in any kind of relationship?!?!! "

My ex-husband and I never cheated on each other. It was the death of our son that broke us up: we didn't grieve together.

He is a good man: he's not unique, there are good decent men (and women) who have loving relationships: I know quite a few.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/01/13 21:34:59]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All cheating partners will be remorseful. That they got found out....!

So they are really sorry it happened....? It didn't happen by accident. You can't accidentally fall on someone else's genitals. It takes planning to get with someone to have sex with them.

For me, I have learned that even supposedly 'happy' swinging couples cheat on each other. If people that are in a swinging relationship and 'allowed' to have sex with other people, then still go behind their partner's back and cheat.... Well how can anyone seriously believe that anyone would be faithful in any kind of relationship?!?!!

My ex-husband and I never cheated on each other. It was the death of our son that broke us up: we didn't grieve together.

He is a good man: he's not unique, there are good decent men (and women) who have loving relationships: I know quite a few."

I agree, I definitely wouldn't take it out on the woman.

I've recently been in a situation where someone I thought was single turned out to be married and his wife found text messages on his phone, I hadn't met him we were just chatting.

She has decided that I'm to blame even though the messages make it obvious that he was telling me he was single. So far she's texted me, written a letter to my husband including screen shots of messages (he knows I'm on here) and has now taken to sending messages through the enquiry field on my website! It's not a nice situation to be in to be harassed like this when he was the one who was lying to us both!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"It would be over, immediatly.

Not just due to the act of cheating, but the act of lying too.

Some can fogive a 'mistake', but lying is not a mistake, its a deliberate act to conceal something because they know its wrong.

Sermon over

Good luck whatever the outcome.

xx "

It's the lying that would get me I think.

To spend time with someone else would involve telling me a lie that I would believe: that would get me, a faulty bullshit detector!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex cheated on me, I gave him a second chance but couldn't forget about it. He is now with that person and they have had a baby together. Worst is she was my best friend at the time.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

I would call it a day. When I have been in a relationship I have been utterly monogamous and I expect the same back. Once that's gone, the relationship is over.

Probably why I am better suited to the lifestyle I have now.

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By *eryBigGirlWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Def out the door!!

I've seen the fucked up mess 2 mates are in after forgiving cheating husbands as they know its doomed cos they've completely lost the trust in them!!

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

I would say it depends.

(man speaking)

Cheating covers a wide range of activities and hand on heart I could not say that if the wife went out got d*unk and snogged a bloke from work, or had sex with them I would be saying goodbye.

I would not be happy, but neither could I say that an slip of inhibitions should reduce 15 years of love and affection to nothing.

Other than that though, I would not know until it hit me. Making rules in theory is one thing, what happens when life happens is something else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I Jez would ask myself if I had done something to encourage Tracy to cheat. For example had I become less attentive. Was I taking her for granted etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/01/13 22:21:19]

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By *pecifically1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

It would not be an option..the door would be too busy hitting them on the ass as I shoved him through it...

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

A lot of people say it's the lying that bothers them.

But not all cheating involves lying does it???

Does a d*unken shag, where they own up the next day regretting what they did count as cheating?

To me it does, but it does not involve lying.

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

In a vanilla relationship I can imagine the hurt cheating would cause. It is something I have never experienced and never want to...

In a swinging relationship, I would find that even worse! Given a licence to shag others (albeit with a joint descision and together) and still not satisfied? Out the feckin door!

If it was a d*unken shag? Here's the news people! Booze has had a lot of bad press over the years and some of it well deserved, but it cannot make you do things you don't want to do! It just gives you the "dutch courage" to actually do it!

Funny how we made vows to forsake all others and here we are shagging other people.. Some have tried to say that is cheating, but to us that is just playtime. Cheating is without the partners consent!

What is cheating to us? Well, to me (male) it is having sex with someone else without my consent but it is not flirting, no matter if I am there, know or not!

Cheating to her? It starts with text messages that she doesn't know about if they are of a sexual nature, even to people we have played with!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Me thinks it is all down to the individuals and the situation they are in. The world is just not black and white - no matter how much we would like it to be clear cut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope not a chance!

And if you swing with a partner and they still felt the need to cheat then it would be a poor situation cause doing this should all be about honesty,trust and respect.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter


"I did!! Lets hope he will be as charitable should the need arise.

I even kept quiet so we got over Xmas with the kids before I told him I knew.

I had known 2 months but didnt want to upset a very important visit to "inlaws" for my son .

Boy I had some fun with that women in the meantime !!

This was nothing to do with swinging..

He was meeting someone having an affair.

Always easy to say I would leave / walk out ..used to say it myself back in the days I cared.

Truth to say it no longer mattered that much. It ended so no point in breaking up. One just carries on as before.

My pleasure was the annoyance ! I caused at her work place makes me smile even now

You see, I don't get this mentality. If my husband cheated on me, any repercussions would be heading HIS way! He's the one I exchanged vows with, he's the one that betrayed my trust.

The other woman owes me absolutely nothing, so why waste energy on her? "

Well I guess we all different ... We all have our own ways of dealing with lifes little stress's

As I said I couldnt do anything or say anything due to circumstances so had my own fun involving her.

He got his come uppance after Xmas.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if they showed me the door it would be for them to piss off and me to shut it behind them coz a wouldn't have them slamming my door!

If I were cheating its coz a wasn't getting it at home so it would be her fault.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if they showed me the door it would be for them to piss off and me to shut it behind them coz a wouldn't have them slamming my door!

If I were cheating its coz a wasn't getting it at home so it would be her fault.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did its how I realised I was turned on by it and now I love being a cuckquean

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By *ll-Knight-longMan
over a year ago

Derby/Notts(Long Eaton)


"Nope not a chance!

And if you swing with a partner and they still felt the need to cheat then it would be a poor situation cause doing this should all be about honesty,trust and respect."

And everyone on here is automatically seeing cheating as the sex or lying but another side of cheating as I had was a complete "fabrication" of a fantasy world by her to make things "feel good" from wasting money on luxuries and not paying for necessities to making up stories of tax rebates etc. but in her mind she wasn't lying as she believed her own created truths......I bailed her and forgave but when it happened again the trust had gone ....it was down to me to hold a job down , look after teenage and nursery aged kids and take the flack from people believing her fantasy stories.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Nope not a chance!

And if you swing with a partner and they still felt the need to cheat then it would be a poor situation cause doing this should all be about honesty,trust and respect.

And everyone on here is automatically seeing cheating as the sex or lying but another side of cheating as I had was a complete "fabrication" of a fantasy world by her to make things "feel good" from wasting money on luxuries and not paying for necessities to making up stories of tax rebates etc. but in her mind she wasn't lying as she believed her own created truths......I bailed her and forgave but when it happened again the trust had gone ....it was down to me to hold a job down , look after teenage and nursery aged kids and take the flack from people believing her fantasy stories. "
Well said and yet another example about the world not being black and white.

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By *vana sukalotWoman
over a year ago

In a land of make believe (Derby)


"The door, regardless of what circumstance, that to me is not love."

I could never forgive, it would always be at the back of your mind. Once the trust has been broken there is no way of getting it back.

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