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Sexcessful Initial Message Tips for Fabsters

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

Hope this helps;

1 - Read the profile of those you wish to message and consider is it worthwhile doing so.

2 - Never send a Hi, hey, how r u, one liners. Expect to be binned if you do, and don’t continue to message further, you have already ruined any chances with your initial ‘effort’.

3 - If messaging and requesting a meet up consider location and the miles you need to travel, have you attached a recent face photograph of yourself?

Failure to consider distance or sending no face photo with your message means the recipient will simply not reply. This isn’t blind date. In fact if those you message are unknown and you are unaware of what they look like, how do you know if there’s attraction visually?

4 - Considering the 3 tips above, consider your approach. Be polite in your message, never add genital pix. If asking a question, is this already answered on the profile write up. If so don’t ask as it appears you haven’t shown enough interest to read their profile.

5 - Don’t message about yourself, I’m into this, I want xyz etc. Your own profile write up should state all this. If you’re message interests in a positive way which provokes a reply in kind, the recipient will most likely have looked at your profile for further clarification to see if it’s worthwhile, so ensure a decent profile is there for them to see with tasteful pix.

Replies don’t necessarily mean it will lead anywhere but being fab friendly helps rather than not.

Hopefully the above tips helps those genuine life-stylers consider what the recipient look’s for, and would need as a starting minimum.

Suggest to meet at local socials or local clubs in person offers both parties safe ground to get to know one and other in an open minded sexy environment.

Good luck from here.

VJ x

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By *erriman69Couple
over a year ago

highworth

Perfect advice!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good advice, and very much what I do in all my messaging.

It's worth noting, that the vast majority of messages are either A) never read, B) deleted straight away, or C) never replied to.

If I look back through my sent items, the reply rate is about 1 in 10 so it can get very admin heavy, and very response light even if you're following these guidelines and not being rude/distasteful etc.

Not a complaint from another single guy, but an observation hence why a lot of men are rude and can't handle the numbers/rejection rate.

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

One other thing to remember is most women will look at your profile before they even read your message.

If your profile is not interesting or has one line of bio and no pictures don't expect to get any reply or even for your message to be read.

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

Yes as point 5 suggests

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

[Removed by poster at 05/03/23 12:18:00]

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

[Removed by poster at 05/03/23 12:17:02]

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

It’s a numbers game isn’t it.

Single males versus single females versus couples. You guys really need to work hard, earn it and stand out from the crowd. I know that’s not what many wish or want to believe but it’s the truth.

Remember a lot of single female profiles that exist may likely be attached/married and have a joint fab profile too, so only look for a single to join them now and then. The male most likely would have a say, so respect to his wife/partner will be what they seek. So bear this in mind when messaging a ‘single female’ profile.

Your A, B, C is answered in my one to five why delete, ignored or no reply occurs. There’s a reason. It will never be done in spite. Female profiles sometimes get bombarded with dross, they simply bulk delete, leave fab or simply only meet at clubs, socials and parties. It cuts out their heavy admin!

I’ve had numerous hi messages today from all over the country. My profile states I don’t meet one on one, I don’t respond to hi only messages but still I continue to receive them and so I continue to delete. I don’t need to read them as I can see the opening line in my inbox. Remember this guys.

1 in 10 is decent no?

You’ve stated you try to follow in the main the tips mentioned. Many don’t so imagine their inbox.

In truth, speaking from my own point of view it would take months for me to send ten messages, being the first initial message sent out. I reply more than I send in the first instance.

So that may tell you a female will be more considered in her approach than a male. The male of course try’s his luck, which is fair enough. It comes back to that numbers game.

Clubs, parties, socials simply gets you meeting in person if you are able to attend any. That’s the easiest alternative I guess.

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

I'd add one more point: please don't take machine gun approach to messaging. Send ONE message, wait patiently for it to be read and, possibly, reply to. There is no need to bombard the person with message after message after message before they even had a chance to read your first one. If you do that to me, you end up straight on the block list.

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

Agree with this. People may appear online, doesn’t mean they can reply at that time.

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By *akbearMan
over a year ago

Newbury

Thanks for confirming my thoughts (and approach), yes the success rate for single blokes is low, but if they haven't put the effort into the profile or response what do you expect.

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

Tbf, none of that matters if I am not attracted to you... Whether I can see that or not, I will, more than likely, just delete the message.

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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

That is good advice and also as one said above about a, b and c there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May I add a poor copy and paste erotica job of what you want to do to me will only end up being ignored.

But great advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It’s a numbers game isn’t it.

Single males versus single females versus couples. You guys really need to work hard, earn it and stand out from the crowd. I know that’s not what many wish or want to believe but it’s the truth.

Remember a lot of single female profiles that exist may likely be attached/married and have a joint fab profile too, so only look for a single to join them now and then. The male most likely would have a say, so respect to his wife/partner will be what they seek. So bear this in mind when messaging a ‘single female’ profile.

Your A, B, C is answered in my one to five why delete, ignored or no reply occurs. There’s a reason. It will never be done in spite. Female profiles sometimes get bombarded with dross, they simply bulk delete, leave fab or simply only meet at clubs, socials and parties. It cuts out their heavy admin!

I’ve had numerous hi messages today from all over the country. My profile states I don’t meet one on one, I don’t respond to hi only messages but still I continue to receive them and so I continue to delete. I don’t need to read them as I can see the opening line in my inbox. Remember this guys.

1 in 10 is decent no?

You’ve stated you try to follow in the main the tips mentioned. Many don’t so imagine their inbox.

In truth, speaking from my own point of view it would take months for me to send ten messages, being the first initial message sent out. I reply more than I send in the first instance.

So that may tell you a female will be more considered in her approach than a male. The male of course try’s his luck, which is fair enough. It comes back to that numbers game.

Clubs, parties, socials simply gets you meeting in person if you are able to attend any. That’s the easiest alternative I guess."

Oh I have zero issues in meeting people - and there's more to it than just Fab. I think there's a perception on here that all your interactions with other people have to be from/documented here on they didn't happen.

None of my post was a complaint, and I fully understand the dynamics of this site - having been on here about 12 years as both single and couple, I get it totally.

I've run club events, and still run private parties too so have little requirement for any alternatives (I don't run private events via Fab, it's too messy on here)

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

I’m aware you aren’t complaining as previously stated. It is a forum to discuss and whilst you have self confessed you don’t require those tips I’m hoping for the majority they may help and also explain for reasons of non replies etc, to messages.

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By *rlandoMan
over a year ago

Lincolnshire


"Hope this helps;

1 - Read the profile of those you wish to message and consider is it worthwhile doing so.

2 - Never send a Hi, hey, how r u, one liners. Expect to be binned if you do, and don’t continue to message further, you have already ruined any chances with your initial ‘effort’.

3 - If messaging and requesting a meet up consider location and the miles you need to travel, have you attached a recent face photograph of yourself?

Failure to consider distance or sending no face photo with your message means the recipient will simply not reply. This isn’t blind date. In fact if those you message are unknown and you are unaware of what they look like, how do you know if there’s attraction visually?

4 - Considering the 3 tips above, consider your approach. Be polite in your message, never add genital pix. If asking a question, is this already answered on the profile write up. If so don’t ask as it appears you haven’t shown enough interest to read their profile.

5 - Don’t message about yourself, I’m into this, I want xyz etc. Your own profile write up should state all this. If you’re message interests in a positive way which provokes a reply in kind, the recipient will most likely have looked at your profile for further clarification to see if it’s worthwhile, so ensure a decent profile is there for them to see with tasteful pix.

Replies don’t necessarily mean it will lead anywhere but being fab friendly helps rather than not.

Hopefully the above tips helps those genuine life-stylers consider what the recipient look’s for, and would need as a starting minimum.

Suggest to meet at local socials or local clubs in person offers both parties safe ground to get to know one and other in an open minded sexy environment.

Good luck from here.

VJ x"

you re making a huge assumption it s always the men that should make the first move ... and the women sit back behind their anonymous profiles ......

everything thats wrong FS is summed up in this thread .. it works both ways .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hope this helps;

2 - Never send a Hi, hey, how r u, one liners. Expect to be binned if you do, and don’t continue to message further, you have already ruined any chances with your initial ‘effort’.

"

Had quite a few responses with this line to be fair, no point writing a bio, many just check pics first anyway, just my experience

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"you re making a huge assumption it s always the men that should make the first move ... and the women sit back behind their anonymous profiles ......

everything thats wrong FS is summed up in this thread .. it works both ways ."

Um.

I didn't see any gender specific terms in the OP.

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By *J_Spicey OP   Couple
over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn


"you re making a huge assumption it s always the men that should make the first move ... and the women sit back behind their anonymous profiles ......

everything thats wrong FS is summed up in this thread .. it works both ways .

Um.

I didn't see any gender specific terms in the OP."

I’m not assuming anything nor would I.

And as already pointed out in my original post it is to all fabsters, singles and couples regardless of gender.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m aware you aren’t complaining as previously stated. It is a forum to discuss and whilst you have self confessed you don’t require those tips I’m hoping for the majority they may help and also explain for reasons of non replies etc, to messages."

Sure, and it's good advice for the masses - the problem is, that the people it's aimed at don't appear to use the forums. Those who care about other people are often forum users who want to actually interact and meet people. The bullshitters won't read it, sadly.

Appreciate you putting it out there though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *wingsnroundabouts82Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville

I need to copy and paste this and send it as a reply to all the crap messages we get

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By *rangesmartieWoman
over a year ago

Devon


"Hope this helps;

1 - Read the profile of those you wish to message and consider is it worthwhile doing so.

2 - Never send a Hi, hey, how r u, one liners. Expect to be binned if you do, and don’t continue to message further, you have already ruined any chances with your initial ‘effort’.

3 - If messaging and requesting a meet up consider location and the miles you need to travel, have you attached a recent face photograph of yourself?

Failure to consider distance or sending no face photo with your message means the recipient will simply not reply. This isn’t blind date. In fact if those you message are unknown and you are unaware of what they look like, how do you know if there’s attraction visually?

4 - Considering the 3 tips above, consider your approach. Be polite in your message, never add genital pix. If asking a question, is this already answered on the profile write up. If so don’t ask as it appears you haven’t shown enough interest to read their profile.

5 - Don’t message about yourself, I’m into this, I want xyz etc. Your own profile write up should state all this. If you’re message interests in a positive way which provokes a reply in kind, the recipient will most likely have looked at your profile for further clarification to see if it’s worthwhile, so ensure a decent profile is there for them to see with tasteful pix.

Replies don’t necessarily mean it will lead anywhere but being fab friendly helps rather than not.

Hopefully the above tips helps those genuine life-stylers consider what the recipient look’s for, and would need as a starting minimum.

Suggest to meet at local socials or local clubs in person offers both parties safe ground to get to know one and other in an open minded sexy environment.

Good luck from here.

VJ x"

Great tips!

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

The first part of the opening sentence of your message is readable without opening it, make it count. About 10-12 words or so.

So instead of how's you say something that stands out about their profile as your opening.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tbf, none of that matters if I am not attracted to you... Whether I can see that or not, I will, more than likely, just delete the message. "
Exactly this. Mark twain could write the message for you and it wouldn't mean shit if they're not attracted to you.

Saves time, being generic. Test the waters. Keep it simple.

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