FabSwingers.com forum: Getting to know someone before a meet.

By *tallionExotica OP Man
over a year ago

Islington

I know that everyone has their own way of meeting up people off here on fabs but what do you all prefer?

Personally for me I prefer to get to know the person a bit before arranging a meet. Though that being said, it also comes with a lot of challenges what with the amount of messages women and couples get on here especially when you're a single male.

To be fair, I've still yet to meet someone with whom I connected really well. The problem is that the conversations don't go to the point where I can arrange a meet because by the time you know it, the other person ends up ghosting you and the effort you put in seems all for naught.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

[Removed by poster at 11/12/22 12:25:38]

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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough / Stamford

We find that more than a few days of "chat" and we never meet - chat gets dull, turns into daily "been naughty?" questions that we hate.

If we know we can't meet for a week or so, we'll ask the other person to get back to us, or we'll try and get back to them, nearer the time.

(Bry)

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I'm absolutely shit at small talk so I'd rather arrange at least a social fairly quickly or I'll just stop chatting, it gets a little monotonous "how's your day" "what you upto" kinda stuff, I can never tell if there's a good connection via messages, only face to face.

Mrs

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

True connections take time to develop.

People will let you see the public persona they want to show off at first and hide their true grotesque nature until they can either no longer hide it or no longer care.

Remember DTA.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Long enough to feel comfortable enough meeting, not too long you haven't wasted much time if they bail.

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By *exysoul888TV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

I like to meet first, then if there is any connection, it will become apparent then x

Like Cher said, it's in his/her kiss

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I prefer to get to know people before getting naked with them so I tend to chat for a while and then arrange a social.

If they aren't interested in a social we won't be meeting at all.

I accept there is always the risk of the chat turning bland but I've never seen it as wasted time if it doesn't go beyond the social.

I've never had any expectations since joining here and that hasn't changed so I see any conversation that goes beyond a couple of messages as a positive.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"True connections take time to develop.

People will let you see the public persona they want to show off at first and hide their true grotesque nature until they can either no longer hide it or no longer care.

Remember DTA.

Agree with this

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

Not really one for endless messaging as I get bored generally . Fab is mostly Just physical sex meets with light banter for me I try meet within two weeks of messaging as after that hrs mostly just pointless messaging back and forth with no purpose.

Ideally I like 3/4 messages have a video chat to prove we are whom we claim to be and to ascertain you find each other attractive. Love cam is very different to static pics. Then just crack on with a date shortly after

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By *oojCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

One can waste so much time "chatting", couple of messages then if we seem to click come for a chat and drink and if the vibe happens then either let things progress or set another date, a well written profile tends to give folk an idea of yourself.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

We're generally like this and at the start of our journey thought this is the only way. However this isn't ways the case. We time in a club we were having sex and this couple found us who didn't speak much English. Anyway I don't know how it got started but somewhere they kind of indicated they'd like to join in. Normally we'd say were just keeping it to ourselves but there was just something about this couple. It just all kind of happened. They were hot and it just all flowed really easy, naturally and perfectly. Then we finished, they left and never seen them again. So our generally style is still to befreind people, get to know them and seduce them to the bedroom if the chemistry is right. But we also know from this encounter (and a couple of others in our time) sometimes it's just happens without social element with the right people in the right place at the right time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How can you tell a nice personality from a few pics and a signal message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes and no

I like it because I get a feel that they are genuine and want to meet, so I’ll chat with them. But so many times now it’s just ended up in endless talking and losing the want to meet.

I try to arrange a social/meet as soon as possible now. I also like to save the talk and getting to know them for the actual social.

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

"I know that everyone has their own way of meeting up people off here on fabs but what do you all prefer?

wish people would stop using the term ghosting for the wrong reasons ..ghosting is from a partner or long term friend its some one you already know well not strangers or new friends youve just met ....

i lose interest very quickly with a lot of guys via chatting and that can be many many reasons from boring to not agreeing with the things said to alsorts if they stop talking they are not interested no matter what and nothing can be done about that ...but you must continue to be you and do things as you want there will be someone who prefers the longer chat somewhere bearing in mind at all times that 100/200 men per one woman it could take some time .or maybe not ...

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

"How can you tell a nice personality from a few pics and a signal message

alot of swinging couples and women are not interested in consant chatting just because you here this alot on the forums its not the rule alot of swingers are wanting fun there and then and are happy with a decent pic and 2 or 3 messages ie they dont want to know you they just want fun with you ..

these forums do not paint a picture of the scene very well at all alot of the scene is very spontaneous and free flowing not socials and almost looking for boyfriend type just to fuck ...

the forums dont paint the scene well at all even tho some like to think they run it at times ...swinging is a very very mixed lifestyle with many many views on how to live it

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

A bit of forum flirting, followed by some naughty dms and you'll know if someone's legit pretty quickly

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By *otwifeandcuckCouple
over a year ago

Blackpool

Can't stand all the bullshit tbh

Meet in a pub near yours. Yeah your not a complete weirdo and look half decent.

Take me back to yours fuck me senseless wham bam thankyou.

Can't cope with blokes that wanna get a connection maybe a separate social or two... Fuck off I'm married already I ain't dating you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How can you tell a nice personality from a few pics and a signal message

these forums do not paint a picture of the scene very well at all alot of the scene is very spontaneous and free flowing not socials and almost looking for boyfriend type just to fuck ...

the forums dont paint the scene well at all even tho some like to think they run it at times ...swinging is a very very mixed lifestyle with many many views on how to live it

Thanks for your input

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't stand all the bullshit tbh

Meet in a pub near yours. Yeah your not a complete weirdo and look half decent.

Take me back to yours fuck me senseless wham bam thankyou.

Can't cope with blokes that wanna get a connection maybe a separate social or two... Fuck off I'm married already I ain't dating you. "

Crikey.

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By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Takes two to tango. I prefer a bit of chat first, or at least a social. If the woman can't even hold a conversation, she'll be a dead kipper in the sheets

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By *otwifeandcuckCouple
over a year ago

Blackpool

"Can't stand all the bullshit tbh

Meet in a pub near yours. Yeah your not a complete weirdo and look half decent.

Take me back to yours fuck me senseless wham bam thankyou.

Can't cope with blokes that wanna get a connection maybe a separate social or two... Fuck off I'm married already I ain't dating you.

Crikey.

Haha it not quite as blunt as that tbf.

But sometimes it all gets a bit tedious blokes messaging desperate for a shag then when you message back they want to get to know you properly and "never have sex on the time of meeting"... Wtf its a swinging site thats exactly what swinging is lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't actually arranged a meet yet but this is something I am currently hoping will change soon.

I prefer to get to know someone first before arranging a meet so that I can make sure he is genuine and that when we do meet I'm going to be 100% comfortable with him. This probably has more to do with the fact I haven't had a meet yet more than anything else.

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I haven't actually arranged a meet yet but this is something I am currently hoping will change soon.

Take your time. Make sure you're happy before your first meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've done both lots of chatting them met.. and hardly any chatting and met. I do prefer to chat for awhile before meeting someone personally but sometimes if I'm feeling spontaneous I will meet sooner

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By *aked_magicMan
over a year ago

the gutter looking at the stars (S.Australia)

I prefer a bit of a chat before meeting in person. Doesn't have to go on for days in end but need to get an idea of what a person is like before going out of my way for them, I'm just too busy to take a chance on people. I'm a very keen judge of character so don't expect endless message tennis but meeting drop of a hat style with no previous chat though is out of the question

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By *edstockings2Couple
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

To be honest with the limit time we have, we don't like lots of chat or socials before playing.

There is time for getting to know someone after you know what they are like in bed.

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