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What Would make it easier for you to visit a swingers club?

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By *aughtycp1 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon

If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes

A female partner in crime.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better Understanding how it works. I want to visit but I have no idea what happens… do I have to go dressed smart? No clothes at all? Is it just a place for sex? Is it mainly for drinks and socialising? Are there changing rooms? What’s the etiquette etc.

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By *oroRick1027Man
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Particularly as a pensioner, I have stopped going my local club as I can't afford the £25 they charge single men.

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"A female partner in crime."

That always helps as its cheaper.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone to go with

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"Better Understanding how it works. I want to visit but I have no idea what happens… do I have to go dressed smart? No clothes at all? Is it just a place for sex? Is it mainly for drinks and socialising? Are there changing rooms? What’s the etiquette etc."

Find your local club, if its any good it'll have a website which will explain all that.

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By *teampunk barbieWoman
over a year ago

where i choose

A local 1

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east


"A female partner in crime."

Can i ask why ?

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"Particularly as a pensioner, I have stopped going my local club as I can't afford the £25 they charge single men."

25 quid where are you from, thats cheap as chips compared to the south.

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England


"If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol"

Slight tangent; but seen this sort of comment before. Guess clubs can either limit by charging more or physically limit the number of men that attend.

We attend clubs when single men are allowed and the ratio is just about right. Would we want to go if the ratio was one couple per 50 men, probably not.

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes


"A female partner in crime.

Can i ask why ? "

I went alone once and felt a bit uneasy, I'm not outgoing at first and it took a while to engage in a little chat with people, I also felt quite creeped out watching the behaviour of some of the single guys following couples around when they walked off to find rooms etc and felt I would be judged to be the same, with a partner in crime even if there were no presumptions of engaging together alone I think others would be more likely to chat and mix with you.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
over a year ago

Next Door


"A female partner in crime."

Why can't you go on your own? I get its more expensive.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Went to a club with wife years ago in manchester .. put me off clubs for quite a while ..was full of single guys ..they were perched everywhere watching , following wherever we went ..reminded me of alfred hitchcock film " The Birds "

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By *um4playtime-withmeWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham.

The price for any lone female. It hard making the decision to go thn the pricing can make you not wanna go again

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes


"A female partner in crime.

Why can't you go on your own? I get its more expensive."

Sorry just saw this, I've answered just above.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east


"A female partner in crime.

Can i ask why ?

I went alone once and felt a bit uneasy, I'm not outgoing at first and it took a while to engage in a little chat with people, I also felt quite creeped out watching the behaviour of some of the single guys following couples around when they walked off to find rooms etc and felt I would be judged to be the same, with a partner in crime even if there were no presumptions of engaging together alone I think others would be more likely to chat and mix with you."

Yeah i get that was just curious to know ..heard that same thing from alot of guys who seem to think having a fem with them guarantees them getting laid lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we've been doing clubs for 28 year but not all the time we find they get stale same people week in week out same click never enough men and i dont mean the same ones who go everyweek just to perv n wank...

we'd like to see no free for women so that women and couples pay more so that men dont have too its not fair on the guys ....

but then clubs are not for all and as a scene its a very very small part mosat swinger never go to clubs thats why there are so few and never full ...and with this winter money being tight with everythiong going up i can see a few clubs not making it

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By *unx2019Couple
over a year ago

Moray

A club closer to here. Nearest one is over 2 hours away

Going to Blackpool at beginning of October so here's, hoping, any advice willingly accepted

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes


"A female partner in crime.

Can i ask why ?

I went alone once and felt a bit uneasy, I'm not outgoing at first and it took a while to engage in a little chat with people, I also felt quite creeped out watching the behaviour of some of the single guys following couples around when they walked off to find rooms etc and felt I would be judged to be the same, with a partner in crime even if there were no presumptions of engaging together alone I think others would be more likely to chat and mix with you.

Yeah i get that was just curious to know ..heard that same thing from alot of guys who seem to think having a fem with them guarantees them getting laid lol "

Ha ha, nothing is ever a cert, it's more to feel more involved and approachable, getting some physical action would be a bonus but it's more about the fitting in and being more socially accepted beleive it or not, getting laid would not be the only reason for going to a club, I think that's why so many men are dissapointed when the go with that expectation.

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By *un BadgersCouple
over a year ago

Stansted & France

I've heard they can be very cliquey so wouldn't go unless we were going with friends.

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

A decent babysitter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me it’s the dress code. Never know what to wear / what not to wear. Clothes anxiety.

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By *edonist79Man
over a year ago

Trowbridge

As a single man the extra cost put me off for a long time. I didn't know what to expect and didn't want to pay£40 or more and find it was shit. Or go there and find it was full of people that I wouldn't be into at all.

But once I got over that no problems.

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By *terobs6869Man
over a year ago

Llandudno

I found having a woman to go with helped.

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By *andR2019Couple
over a year ago

Nunya


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

We found that we just needed a little bit more balls lol xx

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By *ammo89Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

If 99% of the other guys there didn't have better bodies and bigger cocks than me.

Mind you, I'm still happy to go along just to have a laugh and socialise

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By *onathan14Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

An open mind with no expectation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

Although we're not newbies to Fab or swinging, we've not yet been to a club.

Nearly all the different types of people we've met & played with thro Fab have been & tell us we should at least try it once, with offers to come with us.

Problem is that so far the footage we've seen on programmes like those Channel 4 fly on the wall docs along with the tales of bad experiences on forums etc.. Means for us, the bad bits outweigh the good bits.

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria


"A female partner in crime."

Why take a packed lunch to a buffet..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Somebody to go with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Particularly as a pensioner, I have stopped going my local club as I can't afford the £25 they charge single men."

I'd be going every weekend if I only had to pay £25 it's £45 at my local club

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?"

most if not all clubs charge woman a small fee to enter a club and single gents considerably more and single guy membership is very expensive too

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

So we exclusively meet in clubs now because of too many want-to-be and ghosts in a private meet but have recently stopped going to a couple of clubs because after covid they seem desperate to make a little money by letting way too many single guys in and tipping the balance and ruining the atmosphere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x

Although we're not newbies to Fab or swinging, we've not yet been to a club.

Nearly all the different types of people we've met & played with thro Fab have been & tell us we should at least try it once, with offers to come with us.

Problem is that so far the footage we've seen on programmes like those Channel 4 fly on the wall docs along with the tales of bad experiences on forums etc.. Means for us, the bad bits outweigh the good bits. "

It took me and the wife around 8 or 9 months before we plucked up the courage to finally visit a club, go when you are both ready and make your minds up for yourself what it is like, the Doc's on TV don't even come close to showing what they are actually like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x

Although we're not newbies to Fab or swinging, we've not yet been to a club.

Nearly all the different types of people we've met & played with thro Fab have been & tell us we should at least try it once, with offers to come with us.

Problem is that so far the footage we've seen on programmes like those Channel 4 fly on the wall docs along with the tales of bad experiences on forums etc.. Means for us, the bad bits outweigh the good bits.

It took me and the wife around 8 or 9 months before we plucked up the courage to finally visit a club, go when you are both ready and make your minds up for yourself what it is like, the Doc's on TV don't even come close to showing what they are actually like."

Thank you for that. Interesting to hear your angle on it.

xx

(btw-can you give an example of, in what way they're not like on the tv progs?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A club closer to here. Nearest one is over 2 hours away

Going to Blackpool at beginning of October so here's, hoping, any advice willingly accepted "

Same - South London is our nearest. Yes there are spa clubs very near by but we aren't keen on that type nor meeting someone our exes know

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

I go to clubs but not very often. There aren't many local to me so it means staying in a hotel, traveling miles making it very expensive.

Plus you end up using the whole weekend just for a night out.

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By *r SensualMan
over a year ago

London

I’ve found personally that a good club night has a mixture of couples and singles (of both genders) as they all add their own flavour to the night.

Yes some clubs may overrun them with single men for whatever reason but if that’s not your flavour there’s always nights you can go to where none are allowed (Couples and ladies only nights).

Most clubs will give newbies a tour of the venue, explain the rules/etiquette when you arrive or answer any questions you may have prior to your visit too to put any concerns at ease. It’s then down what you make of them. Personally, I can every club event I’ve been to both with a female and alone I’ve had a pleasant experience and people have been welcoming.

Just my humble opinion.

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes


"A female partner in crime.

Why take a packed lunch to a buffet.. "

It's only a buffet if you have a meal ticket

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By *aughtycp1 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Thankyou everyone for your input to our question. It's really interesting to hear the different reasons. We have been offered a unique opportunity to host a night especially for couples and ladies who have always wanted to try a club but for whatever reason never have. Your input is most helpful. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An introduction area with huge jacuzzi

- water relaxes everyone

- generally have to bare all in water

- its a great place to chat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d love to find another female to attend clubs with

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

A question: how would you feel if you did?

Against, how do you feel not going?

Oh, and being grown up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Better Understanding how it works. I want to visit but I have no idea what happens… do I have to go dressed smart? No clothes at all? Is it just a place for sex? Is it mainly for drinks and socialising? Are there changing rooms? What’s the etiquette etc.

Find your local club, if its any good it'll have a website which will explain all that."

It doesn’t. That’s why I made that list in response to OP’s question

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By *tockport 69Couple
over a year ago

Stockport

If it was couple only

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By *y new oneCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

Air con

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington


"If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol

Slight tangent; but seen this sort of comment before. Guess clubs can either limit by charging more or physically limit the number of men that attend.

We attend clubs when single men are allowed and the ratio is just about right. Would we want to go if the ratio was one couple per 50 men, probably not. "

Exactly this. We attend when men are limited but wingless women are not. Not our thing and dont need them following us around.

If clubs didn't charge this way, yeah people would be turned away, ratious would be completely off and you would.just end up with a club full of guys in the end.

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By *portbilly1976Man
over a year ago

manchester

So they cap the number of guys…first come first in.

Will be interesting to see how many keep going over the winter of cost of living hits middle earners. Manchester clubs generally £40 or so a visit (+ membership)

Air con I agree with..many rooms become uncomfortably hot after a few minutes

Midweek tend to be much quieter if you’re nervous about it being busy.

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By *eeds fun guyMan
over a year ago

yorkshire

Lots of couples wanting a MMF with a very open minded guy pretty much anything goes when the door is shut

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By *igGs19Woman
over a year ago

Castle Douglas


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

Better understanding of club etiquette, how the evenings unfold, and how cliquey or open they actually are.

Reviews and varifications I've read for or about most clubs seem to be a fair amount of the same locals / regulars who all know each other at least socially. That's a bit of a put off.

Stuck between there being nothing local to me, but also not wanting to play locally because of my job. So the nearest club is 2+ hours away which makes it an expensive trip when you add travel and hotel, etc. Not ideal.

Lastly age ranges... I've seen from a couple that are more local to me that their reviews were largely 50+ or older couples and so on. That'd be like swinging with my dad, no thanks!!

Fab in general feels cliquey when it comes to the club scene, so even trying to involve in conversation socially to go to socials then think about a club night doesn't feel easy. Resigned that it's probably just not an opportunity I'm gonna see.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A trusted male - I’m easily led n I’m afraid I’d walk out of the club with regrets if I didn’t have a trusted friend with me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x

Better understanding of club etiquette, how the evenings unfold, and how cliquey or open they actually are.

Reviews and varifications I've read for or about most clubs seem to be a fair amount of the same locals / regulars who all know each other at least socially. That's a bit of a put off.

Stuck between there being nothing local to me, but also not wanting to play locally because of my job. So the nearest club is 2+ hours away which makes it an expensive trip when you add travel and hotel, etc. Not ideal.

Lastly age ranges... I've seen from a couple that are more local to me that their reviews were largely 50+ or older couples and so on. That'd be like swinging with my dad, no thanks!!

Fab in general feels cliquey when it comes to the club scene, so even trying to involve in conversation socially to go to socials then think about a club night doesn't feel easy. Resigned that it's probably just not an opportunity I'm gonna see. "

Agree similar concerns

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone

A list of attendees so I could guarantee I didn’t know anyone from my personal or professional life.

Finding really good lingerie which hides all the saggy, wobbly bits and makes my boobs look amazing, even when I move.

One of those infrared light things which show all the stains so I can avoid them.

I’m not really a paranoid clean freak, I promise!

Lou x

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By *ouple261Couple
over a year ago

wonderland

Gone to couples and Fs Club only was fun but doesn't seem to be a thing in uk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Less couples more single men lol I’d actually love a club night that was JUST for singles! Unpopular opinion I know!

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington


"Less couples more single men lol I’d actually love a club night that was JUST for singles! Unpopular opinion I know! "

There are singles nights or greedy girls nights. Thats a thing for most clubs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/08/22 01:50:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol"

Agreed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Less couples more single men lol I’d actually love a club night that was JUST for singles! Unpopular opinion I know!

There are singles nights or greedy girls nights. Thats a thing for most clubs. "

Yeah not greedy girls, that’s not my thing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?"

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"Better Understanding how it works. I want to visit but I have no idea what happens… do I have to go dressed smart? No clothes at all? Is it just a place for sex? Is it mainly for drinks and socialising? Are there changing rooms? What’s the etiquette etc.

Find your local club, if its any good it'll have a website which will explain all that.

It doesn’t. That’s why I made that list in response to OP’s question "

Then it's a poor club I would guess. A website is their window to attract people in. So generally the etiquette is fairly simple. Dress smart / sexy. Be approachable and friendly. If people aren't into you don't get pissed off and be aggressive. There's usually a bar area where you can socialise. Then if you get on with someone you might get lucky. If you expect to meet someone first vist that's a mistake. You need to go to find out how that club works.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol"

I don't think they do as I heard most clubs have a cap on how many single men come. Heard it's mainly couples who go. Single women are the unicorns?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there was one closer to me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Someone to go with "

I second this

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free. "

Hopefully men's behaviour is good as it would just put off single girls like fab online does. I heard so many single women on here getting truly fed up with men's behaviour. Most of them hide their profiles and only message men they're interested in.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"Someone to go with

I second this"

I'm bringing a friend gor morale support and making a weekend of it. Have you asked any of the women on fab to go with you? I did have afew I know but they were busy. But still worth a try. I heard you can always hang out with someone when you get there as single women tend to stick together at the beginning of the night if you need that moral support

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free. "

Have a friend who works at a club. Was going to pop in and say hi but didn't fancy the £90 entrance fee for a single bloke

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"If single men didn't have to fund everyone else lol

Slight tangent; but seen this sort of comment before. Guess clubs can either limit by charging more or physically limit the number of men that attend.

We attend clubs when single men are allowed and the ratio is just about right. Would we want to go if the ratio was one couple per 50 men, probably not.

Exactly this. We attend when men are limited but wingless women are not. Not our thing and dont need them following us around.

If clubs didn't charge this way, yeah people would be turned away, ratious would be completely off and you would.just end up with a club full of guys in the end."

It's quite simple really. All that they need to do is make people book in advance. This way numbers can be capped. So a limit is set. But also there's a dress code lol. I went to a club and a lot of the single men were either cabbies at the end of a shift or some other kind of work but they were a mess and shouldn't have been allowed in. They ruin it for us genuine ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free. "

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

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By *ark69x_glosMan
over a year ago

Cirencester


"A female partner in crime.

Why take a packed lunch to a buffet.. "

Because we are scared all the food will be eaten by others when we get there!

Joking aside, I've been as a single guy and with a FWB. Had fun on all occasions, but as someone who's quite shy to begin with, it can be hard to make the first move in a chat. Ridiculous I know, but the fear of rejection is still high!

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free"

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken. "

It’s not unusual for the male entrance fee to be 5 or 10 times the price of females. Every club I’ve ever been to had been like this and I’ve been to quite a few!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken. "

I'm not saying they should. I'm disputing your claim on a club close by that charge men £50 and women free.

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken.

It’s not unusual for the male entrance fee to be 5 or 10 times the price of females. Every club I’ve ever been to had been like this and I’ve been to quite a few! "

Surely you mean an extra £5 or £10 more!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken. "

The club in Colchester closed in 2019.

There's one swingers club in Essex and that's monkey business in Wickford.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/08/22 07:39:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken.

It’s not unusual for the male entrance fee to be 5 or 10 times the price of females. Every club I’ve ever been to had been like this and I’ve been to quite a few!

Surely you mean an extra £5 or £10 more!"

No this can be true. I paid £5 on Friday night to get in penthouse. Not sure the single guy fee.

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By *ydrewMan
over a year ago

forest

I agree that price for single men is a put off. £50 to go to a club night seems to much for me.

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By *ecret_Passion777Man
over a year ago

Manchester

Having a club that’s closer and in my home town would help.

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By *entDomMan
over a year ago

Paddock Wood, Kent

For me it's not understanding the etiquette and dress code etc. I'm sure this varies from club to club.

I'm talking as a single guy who's never attended one.

It would be nice to know you were going to be greeted and shown around, perhaps introduced to a few people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having someone to go with

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"I agree that price for single men is a put off. £50 to go to a club night seems to much for me. "

Prices vary massively from one club to the next but certainly the clubs in the North are much more reasonable.

On the other hand, it is important to control the number of single guys. When there are lots of blokes it means that the ladies feel harassed, and the blokes have much less chance of success.

Cal

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By *arriedcoupleNECouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

We're fairly new to the club scene and we had three main issues getting into it.

1) Are we going to fit in, the usual concern when going anywhere new.

2) Getting detailed information, dress code might be smart casual on arrival and dress down later but what does that actually mean? What's the club lay out? Do you look weird if you wear flip flops once dressed down? Do you need to bring anything with you?

3) The arrival. The most nerve wracking part for us, there's the feeling everything changes once you walk in and as you head for the door that everyone is watching and judging. Do everything possible to make this as smooth and swift as possible, definitely don't have a queue at the door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The price for a single man.

As a couple,….. I’d need a woman happy to visit one with me.

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

A few things:

1. Membership prices - if you’re only going once it puts me off (but understand why they are there)

2. Opening hours - 10pm to 3am is too late for me and I’m wiped out the next day - I need my sleep!

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"More women and less single men... maybe they could charge men more and women less?

They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

There's only monkeys business in Essex and ladies aren't free

Monkey business is new. Maybe it's set up that way for a reason. How would a club function if they stopped single men and don't charge women. Then it would be left to the couples to fund the club. Catch 22. Everyone should pay a respectable price but better vetting and limits should be set. However, I thought there was a club in Colchester. Must be mistaken.

I'm not saying they should. I'm disputing your claim on a club close by that charge men £50 and women free. "

I didn't make that exact claim it was another guy from Basildon. .but check out pleasures in Kent or Abfabs and see what their pricing structure is .

It's why men ( if they can find a woman to agree) will take a woman to a club and pay as it's still cheaper than going on their own. Win win.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I'd love a buddy to go with (male or female) because then at least I'd know 1 person

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"A few things:

1. Membership prices - if you’re only going once it puts me off (but understand why they are there)

2. Opening hours - 10pm to 3am is too late for me and I’m wiped out the next day - I need my sleep! "

41 & your wiped out. Lol try being 57. Youll be buggered at my age then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me I think it's the worry that I won't fit in and be left in the corner on my own.

Maybe if I could find a couple or someone that I get along with before going to the club that would guarantee that I'm not so on my own in a new environment.

Also I have no idea what really happens in a club. Do you strip off as you enter the door or do you have to stay dressed around the bar area. Should I go over to a couple or someone I like or should I wait for people more experienced to come to me.

If there was a users manual that explained the ins and outs of a club and what a usual night would look like for couples and singles then I think that would be really helpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free. "

Didn't realise Bas was in Kent

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"I agree that price for single men is a put off. £50 to go to a club night seems to much for me.

Prices vary massively from one club to the next but certainly the clubs in the North are much more reasonable.

On the other hand, it is important to control the number of single guys. When there are lots of blokes it means that the ladies feel harassed, and the blokes have much less chance of success.

Cal"

That's why I think a proper vetting process for membership would work. The twat and fantasists wouldn't get past it. Singles or couples and that would save a lot of strife.

Genuine swingers understand that everyone has their preferences and it's bad manners to be pissed off if your not their thing. As someone said about night clubs. You don't walk out with dozens but hopefully one in all might click with. Swinging is similar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A less strict dress code.

I(Mr) have some scarring from an operation and would prefer to not reveal that, unless in the moment.

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"They already do. There is a club here that charges men £50 a time but women are free.

Didn't realise Bas was in Kent "

It's not but it was the closest for me at the time I went. It's ok but could be managed better. When I went on Saturday to a ladies and couples it was much better. But my friend moved away sadly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Greedy is opposed to clubs as she doesn't want everyone knowing why we're there, she still likes this side of our life private.

She can't explain why she feels like this, but really does.

It's not off the cards, but she thinks it would be easier if it was a bar first (open to all) and foremost with say a swingers club downstairs (members only).

Boss

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"A less strict dress code.

I(Mr) have some scarring from an operation and would prefer to not reveal that, unless in the moment. "

I'd say that was a bad idea. Get in the jacuzzi and socialise. If you got your kit off with a couple or single they might have an adverse reaction which would be awful. If people see if first there's no shocks later

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Greedy is opposed to clubs as she doesn't want everyone knowing why we're there, she still likes this side of our life private.

She can't explain why she feels like this, but really does.

It's not off the cards, but she thinks it would be easier if it was a bar first (open to all) and foremost with say a swingers club downstairs (members only).

Boss"

And also with anxiety, she fears being rejected and/or left out.

Boss

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London


"A few things:

1. Membership prices - if you’re only going once it puts me off (but understand why they are there)

2. Opening hours - 10pm to 3am is too late for me and I’m wiped out the next day - I need my sleep!

41 & your wiped out. Lol try being 57. Youll be buggered at my age then. "

Haha! I’ll be in bed by 8pm then with a cup of hot chocolate!

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"For me it's not understanding the etiquette and dress code etc. I'm sure this varies from club to club.

I'm talking as a single guy who's never attended one.

It would be nice to know you were going to be greeted and shown around, perhaps introduced to a few people "

Have you not been to Pleasures in Kent ! ? They have hosts who show you around and explain the rules .

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham


"A female partner in crime.

Can i ask why ?

I went alone once and felt a bit uneasy, I'm not outgoing at first and it took a while to engage in a little chat with people, I also felt quite creeped out watching the behaviour of some of the single guys following couples around when they walked off to find rooms etc and felt I would be judged to be the same, with a partner in crime even if there were no presumptions of engaging together alone I think others would be more likely to chat and mix with you."

Honestly, I’m more likely to talk to single men - though I’ll talk to everybody. It’s really obvious who is there to get the most from the experience - meet new friends, have a bit of banter, see something new - and who thinks its a cheap alternative to hiring a sex worker and is objectifying the women. Experienced swingers tend to be very good judges of character, IME.

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By *zlakMan
over a year ago

Lowestoft

Take the plunge and go for the first time. I only started going to clubs about a year ago. Was very nervous and still am but pluck up the courage, dress smart, smell nice and most important dont Expect anything.

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham


"For me I think it's the worry that I won't fit in and be left in the corner on my own.

Maybe if I could find a couple or someone that I get along with before going to the club that would guarantee that I'm not so on my own in a new environment.

Also I have no idea what really happens in a club. Do you strip off as you enter the door or do you have to stay dressed around the bar area. Should I go over to a couple or someone I like or should I wait for people more experienced to come to me.

If there was a users manual that explained the ins and outs of a club and what a usual night would look like for couples and singles then I think that would be really helpful."

At my local club, it’s tidal. So there is a wave of movement towards the changing rooms to get dressed down at about 10pm, then some of that wave carries on to playrooms. The tide brings most people back to the bar for drinks an hour or so later before carrying them out again.

Don’t just approach people you fancy, talk to everyone, particularly those who look easy to talk to. A reputation for being good company will take you far in the long run.

My local has the manual on the website then goes over it again on the tour.

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington


"For me I think it's the worry that I won't fit in and be left in the corner on my own.

Maybe if I could find a couple or someone that I get along with before going to the club that would guarantee that I'm not so on my own in a new environment.

Also I have no idea what really happens in a club. Do you strip off as you enter the door or do you have to stay dressed around the bar area. Should I go over to a couple or someone I like or should I wait for people more experienced to come to me.

If there was a users manual that explained the ins and outs of a club and what a usual night would look like for couples and singles then I think that would be really helpful.

At my local club, it’s tidal. So there is a wave of movement towards the changing rooms to get dressed down at about 10pm, then some of that wave carries on to playrooms. The tide brings most people back to the bar for drinks an hour or so later before carrying them out again.

Don’t just approach people you fancy, talk to everyone, particularly those who look easy to talk to. A reputation for being good company will take you far in the long run.

My local has the manual on the website then goes over it again on the tour."

If you are talking about Club F then yeah it's great for singles up there. The staff are solid and look out for members and theres a solid set of rules to follow. Put it this way, we watched them them hoof one new guy out (his first ever visit) never allowed to be back in because he didn't seem to understand what respect and boundaries are. Sounds like a bad thing but it's actually not. On all our visit's thats the only issue we've ever seen. Everyone else is straight up respectful of each other.

Put it this way, my wife is planning on going on her own in the near-ish future. I have no qualms about it because I know she'll be fine.

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By *rnyCpl45Couple
over a year ago

Norwich

Worried about dress code, would we be attracted to anyone, nerves, feeling awkward, distance of venue is an hour away. Would like to give it a go but just not sure it's us.

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near


"Better Understanding how it works. I want to visit but I have no idea what happens… do I have to go dressed smart? No clothes at all? Is it just a place for sex? Is it mainly for drinks and socialising? Are there changing rooms? What’s the etiquette etc."

Most clubs have websites. There very helpful with all these types of questions

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England


"Worried about dress code, would we be attracted to anyone, nerves, feeling awkward, distance of venue is an hour away. Would like to give it a go but just not sure it's us. "

Look on the club website listed on here and it will tell you all you need to know. In general there are two types of dress code: sauna based; towels/sexy or night club based; smart/casual or sexy as you dare on a night out. (Most clubs have lockers, so you can change into sexy wear once arrived).

Distance wise we travel about 90 mins each way; but we find it's well worth the drive.

Really there's nothing to be awkward about. Everyone there is out to have a good time. The hosts will show you around. Have a drink and then explore the club at your leisure. Chill in the hot tub, have a dance, go to a private room or go to an open room.

If you want to keep to yourselves fine. There is no expectation to play and no means NO. If you catch peoples' eye or they yours it's up to you what happens next...

Only you can decide if it's for you; try it once. As the saying goes "What's the worst that can happen?"

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By *ristinapinkWoman
over a year ago

Staines-upon-Thames

I had concerns as well, but started going recently and am loving it. It’s local to me, I know people there that makes me feel safe, and as a woman it’s so much easier to meet at clubs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A less strict dress code.

I(Mr) have some scarring from an operation and would prefer to not reveal that, unless in the moment.

I'd say that was a bad idea. Get in the jacuzzi and socialise. If you got your kit off with a couple or single they might have an adverse reaction which would be awful. If people see if first there's no shocks later"

Though I won't be joining in with others anyway, only my partner.

But this is mainly why it's doubtful we will visit clubs.

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By *asons_CarounnCouple
over a year ago

Manchester


"So we exclusively meet in clubs now because of too many want-to-be and ghosts in a private meet but have recently stopped going to a couple of clubs because after covid they seem desperate to make a little money by letting way too many single guys in and tipping the balance and ruining the atmosphere."

We have moved onto clubs for exactly the same reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would be nice if some clubs opened during the day for couples and singles that can't meet at night for various reasons. Obviously not every day but once a week may be a bonus

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By *hilledGuyClactonMan
over a year ago

Little clacton

A club that's closer.

Would need a small fortune to attend a club.

Travel costs

Staying over

Then paying to enter the club

Could just go down the pub,and meet someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went to a club a few times in Manchester with an ex fwb. She's naturally very outgoing and gregarious, so would chat to anyone and everyone. I'm a little more reserved to begin with, but found it cliquey. Even though I was in the clique due to her, I didn't like the atmosphere of the cliques. I overheard a fair few bitchy comments aimed at the other people there, even from the owner. Pretty out of order tbf. If you weren't in the gang, then you were deemed less worthy. I'm not saying everyone was like that, but just enough who were to put me off. I'd certainly never go on my own as a single bloke.

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"A club that's closer.

Would need a small fortune to attend a club.

Travel costs

Staying over

Then paying to enter the club

Could just go down the pub,and meet someone."

At least you have a nudist beach there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Company

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By *hilledGuyClactonMan
over a year ago

Little clacton


"A club that's closer.

Would need a small fortune to attend a club.

Travel costs

Staying over

Then paying to enter the club

Could just go down the pub,and meet someone.

At least you have a nudist beach there "

Not been there for about 5ish yrs..But I hear it's a very active meeting place again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It would be nice if some clubs opened during the day for couples and singles that can't meet at night for various reasons. Obviously not every day but once a week may be a bonus"

Many do

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By *aughtycp1 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

This thread has been so interesting. There seems to be a lot of couples interested in a first club visit x

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By *ab365XMan
over a year ago

Paisley

I’d definitely need a couple of

Joints just to really chill out if I was to venture into one, I’d probably benefit more if I had a mate go with me lol!

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By *umagain58Man
over a year ago

London


"Went to a club with wife years ago in manchester .. put me off clubs for quite a while ..was full of single guys ..they were perched everywhere watching , following wherever we went ..reminded me of alfred hitchcock film " The Birds " "

Exactly. Lots of arrogant ones as well. Thought they could do whatever wanted with me and wife without asking

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By *entDomMan
over a year ago

Paddock Wood, Kent

I've not visited any myself.

But a sub I know has been a couple of times. She did go with some girl friends. She had no intention of playing on those occasions. However she did say how safe she felt, much more so than a regular club where guys would touch uninvited. She didn't feel pressured at all to play and everyone was respectful.

So on that basis, I would encourage girls to be brave and perhaps go with an open minded friend or two.

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By *afksedMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

First club visit tomorrow! As a plus one for a club enthusiast and crazy lady. Can’t help feeling just a tad lucky!

Have done loads of private parties with friends, but clubs (I assume) are a tad different.

I have to say that my big concern was about being the only fella without company and looking like the creepy perv in the corner!


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

The problem of going with someone else ,if they hit it off with another person you’ll be on your own. So wishing you’d have someone to accompany you may still leave you alone.

Clubs generally have guest lists on the event listing, maybe message some people and ask if they’ll have a drink with you and explain it’s your first time.

Dress codes depend on the night and if it’s a party theme. To be honest whatever you wear down the pub on a Saturday night should be ok.

I tend to find Bi Nights are very friendly, so TV/TS or gay/bi or alt people should try these nights as a first visit.

Women may get too much attention and Men may get absolutely no interest, it’s exactly the same as Saturday night in many ‘normal’ clubs.

I generally find clubs will have more middle aged people attend, so if you’re a 40- 50 year old single guy, you’ll probably do better at a swingers club than your local boozer.

They’re not for everyone and I really feel for guys who are priced out of being able to attend. But with the cost of living crisis emerging I suspect prices will come down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A new club opened in my area 6 weeks ago, its only monthly and the odd themed nights, I went on my own as no partner and felt completely out of my comfort zone but didnt let that deter me from going again a couple of weeks ago. The ratio is 20 couples, 5 single ladies & 5 single males. It has a lovely bar and social area so last time I just went with the attitude its a night out socialising and if I get to play well that's a bonus.

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By *enuine MikeMan
over a year ago

Guildford

The price for administration is far too expensive.

That's the ONLY thing that puts me off

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By *itzimadCouple
over a year ago

harwich

every where is cliquey even your local. its natural to talk to those you already know good clubs will introduce new couples to some of the regulars

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham


"For me I think it's the worry that I won't fit in and be left in the corner on my own.

Maybe if I could find a couple or someone that I get along with before going to the club that would guarantee that I'm not so on my own in a new environment.

Also I have no idea what really happens in a club. Do you strip off as you enter the door or do you have to stay dressed around the bar area. Should I go over to a couple or someone I like or should I wait for people more experienced to come to me.

If there was a users manual that explained the ins and outs of a club and what a usual night would look like for couples and singles then I think that would be really helpful.

At my local club, it’s tidal. So there is a wave of movement towards the changing rooms to get dressed down at about 10pm, then some of that wave carries on to playrooms. The tide brings most people back to the bar for drinks an hour or so later before carrying them out again.

Don’t just approach people you fancy, talk to everyone, particularly those who look easy to talk to. A reputation for being good company will take you far in the long run.

My local has the manual on the website then goes over it again on the tour.

If you are talking about Club F then yeah it's great for singles up there. The staff are solid and look out for members and theres a solid set of rules to follow. Put it this way, we watched them them hoof one new guy out (his first ever visit) never allowed to be back in because he didn't seem to understand what respect and boundaries are. Sounds like a bad thing but it's actually not. On all our visit's thats the only issue we've ever seen. Everyone else is straight up respectful of each other.

Put it this way, my wife is planning on going on her own in the near-ish future. I have no qualms about it because I know she'll be fine. "

Yup, it’s F. I’ve been there both solo and as part of a couple (actually met my partner there) and now spend a ridiculous amount of time in the dungeon on Friday nights. A bit of bluntness with a bit of kindness makes it feel safe.

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By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

If I could offer any advice, would be to just go clubs are ace

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington


"For me I think it's the worry that I won't fit in and be left in the corner on my own.

Maybe if I could find a couple or someone that I get along with before going to the club that would guarantee that I'm not so on my own in a new environment.

Also I have no idea what really happens in a club. Do you strip off as you enter the door or do you have to stay dressed around the bar area. Should I go over to a couple or someone I like or should I wait for people more experienced to come to me.

If there was a users manual that explained the ins and outs of a club and what a usual night would look like for couples and singles then I think that would be really helpful.

At my local club, it’s tidal. So there is a wave of movement towards the changing rooms to get dressed down at about 10pm, then some of that wave carries on to playrooms. The tide brings most people back to the bar for drinks an hour or so later before carrying them out again.

Don’t just approach people you fancy, talk to everyone, particularly those who look easy to talk to. A reputation for being good company will take you far in the long run.

My local has the manual on the website then goes over it again on the tour.

If you are talking about Club F then yeah it's great for singles up there. The staff are solid and look out for members and theres a solid set of rules to follow. Put it this way, we watched them them hoof one new guy out (his first ever visit) never allowed to be back in because he didn't seem to understand what respect and boundaries are. Sounds like a bad thing but it's actually not. On all our visit's thats the only issue we've ever seen. Everyone else is straight up respectful of each other.

Put it this way, my wife is planning on going on her own in the near-ish future. I have no qualms about it because I know she'll be fine.

Yup, it’s F. I’ve been there both solo and as part of a couple (actually met my partner there) and now spend a ridiculous amount of time in the dungeon on Friday nights. A bit of bluntness with a bit of kindness makes it feel safe. "

If we recall correctly, you where in the dungeon most of the night at the hi viz party several weeks back lol. Don't think we spoke though (loads there that night).

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Just the feeling awkward. Ms

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

I’ve never been to a club but I am keen to go

I’ve had some great advice from some other people here (you know who you are ) so most of my questions have been answered, but for me, the main barriers to going to a club would be:

• Location - is it easy to get to

• Standards - is it a high quality venue with a nice (and clean!) environment and members that I would be interested in

• Safety - do they have staff who are going to keep an eye on any issues and chuck people out who won’t take no for an answer

• Security - is there somewhere secure where I can leave my things and enjoy the evening

• Socials - is their website/ socials up to date so I can see nights I’m interested in and I can see recent pics & get answers to FAQ’s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we had one closer to us that opens week nights as we can't make a Friday or Saturday due to work commitments

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Someone to go with "

Same for me as well

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee


"If 99% of the other guys there didn't have better bodies and bigger cocks than me.

"

Didn't you say you were going to stop posting this?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x

If 99% of the other guys there didn't have better bodies and bigger cocks than me.

Mind you, I'm still happy to go along just to have a laugh and socialise "

Give it a rest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just being closer, everything is over a hundred miles away for us

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering

Easier? How hard could it be? You turn up, walk in, start chatting and then.......... really easy !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Someone to go with

Same for me as well"

Same

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By *lappyMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Someone to go with and a lot of confidence

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By *moothCriminal_xMan
over a year ago

Redditch


"I've heard they can be very cliquey so wouldn't go unless we were going with friends."

Exactly this. I would know noone.

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering


"I've heard they can be very cliquey so wouldn't go unless we were going with friends.

Exactly this. I would know noone."

You need to go to the right clubs !

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By *moothCriminal_xMan
over a year ago

Redditch

Can someone write a synopsis of what to do as a single man going for the first time? I mean... there isnt a bar to sit at with the footy on im guessing! BYOB for me would be a hip flask amd id try to sit at the bar and mix my rum and ! Cant go on my phone and in guessing taking a book or a paper is bad etiquette. Are there board games?!

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon


"Just being closer, everything is over a hundred miles away for us "

Surely not. Isn't there someplace on the club list around Cambridge / your neck of the woods?

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

[Removed by poster at 11/08/22 23:49:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For one there are no clubs local.

Second as a single female I don't feel safe going to one. Not so much at the club but the coming out of one on my own just does feel safe.

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By *annydevonMan
over a year ago

Exeter

I've only been to one and although I was shown around the facilities and made welcome in that respect, everyone seemed to know each other already and it was difficult to join in conversations or get to know anyone.

So going with someone would make it a bit more comfortable

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near


"For one there are no clubs local.

Second as a single female I don't feel safe going to one. Not so much at the club but the coming out of one on my own just does feel safe. "

Understandable, and in all honesty when I've gone to clubs on my own and felt uncomfortable leaving, I'll happily speak to club hosts, all will make sure I'm safe journey to hotel/home.

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near


"I've only been to one and although I was shown around the facilities and made welcome in that respect, everyone seemed to know each other already and it was difficult to join in conversations or get to know anyone.

So going with someone would make it a bit more comfortable"

The bar area or hot tub are social hot spots, equally as is the smoking area, if you smoke..or in some clubs there's the pool/ snooker table. All offer a potential social gathering to mingle with. We don't bite unless given a reason

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only been to a couple, but I don't drink alcohol and I'm not a social butterfly anyway, so wasn't really sure how to get into it properly -- even though I was with someone else on each occasion.

I just resigned to a hot tub in the end and let the evening go by. :D

Not sure how I would improve anything, but I don't think I'd want to rock up as a single guy.

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

For me living in North London I have two members only clubs that I can get to within a hour by car. I am a member of one of those which is good.Unfortunately for me they open 10.00 pm to 3.00 am

or 4.00 am depending what night you go.I don’t blame the club as I appreciate there are various licensing laws that a club has to obey to stay open.I just wish that we had a few more non member clubs in London with more relaxed licensing laws.

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near


"I've only been to a couple, but I don't drink alcohol and I'm not a social butterfly anyway, so wasn't really sure how to get into it properly -- even though I was with someone else on each occasion.

I just resigned to a hot tub in the end and let the evening go by. :D

Not sure how I would improve anything, but I don't think I'd want to rock up as a single guy."

What a barrel of laughs

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Having an actual club in the country that isn't by invitation only and open more than once a month would be a good start.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a barrel of laughs "
I stopped drinking years ago because I've got an addictive personality and tend to get carried away with everything I indulge in.

So, trying to get on a level with d*unk people has always been a bit tricky -- and I'd much rather remember my misadventures. :D

However, I think my thing, if I'm honest, is getting my pleasure from whatever my partner is getting up to -- watching a woman's sexuality come to life is hot af.

Going solely for my own pleasure, well it's just never gonna be my thing really.

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By *aughtynottsCouple
over a year ago

Outside Nottingham


"

That always helps as its cheaper."

If your serious about the lifestyle then cost shouldn’t come into it, you pay a premium for an experience that isn’t walking into a normal bar. What are you on about funding everyone else? That’s the most bizarre comment I’ve ever read.

Anyway, to answer the OPs question. Our first time was terrifying haha but we did it, I think sometimes it’s best to take the “you only live once” approach and just dive in head first, I mean the worst that could happen is it’s not for you and you never have to do it again. What I will say is some clubs are more welcoming and enjoyable than others and I’d certainly try a couple of them based on others recommendations everyones club opinions are different and again everyone likes different clubs for different reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they had one in york!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think for me it's all about being nervous being a single man... I'm going to my first one in October and I now have my FWB comming too as it will help me relax more (her first too)

I think a video introduction on the club website (empty premises not with people having fun)

Just an inside look and a tour around just so you get a feel for the place

A tour on the night is great but you will be distracted alot and won't take things in

Maybe some interviews from other first timers and longtime club users (faces hidden if they want to stay private obvs)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/08/22 14:00:40]

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By *onathan14Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

Sometimes entry for guys is eye opening.

Nothing for me, when I decided I just done it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for all newbies and couples who have always wanted to try a club but haven't yet dipped their toe in the water. What would help you decide to take the plunge and go to a club?

Mrs N x"

Newbies here, not been to a club but had a couple of experiences.

Like everyone else, it seems to be understanding the rules etc, I’m not really a dancer for example but the wife is, do men start getting close when dancing, I mean I know why we are there but it’s not just for that, it’s the social as well.

If we are playing do people just come over and get involved, it’s so hard having not been before

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By *evonNewbiesCouple
over a year ago

torquay

Local club has a dress sown policy really as gets hot in there and small social area. Little body conscious when meeting new people at first x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm put off if there's a membership fee as well as entry

Would love to try abfabs but having to pay both puts me off going

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm put off if there's a membership fee as well as entry

Would love to try abfabs but having to pay both puts me off going "

Jaydees is £20 for life membership fee so not so bad, I'd be put off by the clubs that you have to pay an annual fee as I just don't think I'd get to attend often enough to make it worth it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm put off if there's a membership fee as well as entry

Would love to try abfabs but having to pay both puts me off going

Jaydees is £20 for life membership fee so not so bad, I'd be put off by the clubs that you have to pay an annual fee as I just don't think I'd get to attend often enough to make it worth it"

Yeah same, I don't go enough to want to pay extra

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Like many have said already it’s the rip off fees, they charge single guys that put me off

By time you add transport getting to and from, drinks, hotel stay after the club it’s alot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An understanding of etiquette, rules and how to engage with someone. Who makes the first move, how does that happen…

It’s like being 17 and dating al over again, lol.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

A couple of things.

Membership - When I go to a club, I'm Tina Titz and I don't want to break this emersion by the staff seeing a different name on the membership forms.

Parking - I'd like to go to Purple Mamba, but parking isn't easy and whilst I don't mind walking about in public in glam mode, it's not always ideal.

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By *amescoupleCouple
over a year ago

north walsham

Proximity and not keeping photo ID.

Neither of us drive so location is always a challenge as well as no drivers licenses. I have never been abroad and M's passport expired so long ago it probably predates the Queen lol.

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport


"Went to a club with wife years ago in manchester .. put me off clubs for quite a while ..was full of single guys ..they were perched everywhere watching , following wherever we went ..reminded me of alfred hitchcock film " The Birds " "

The technical term for them is "The Wanking Dead"...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the cost is a problem and just general nerves about my body insecurities, loads of naked stunning women walking around in front of my partner making me feel not so great!

A free drink on the door would defo help anxieties! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If hubby wasn’t so self conscious about the way his body looks we’d have gone a long time ago

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By *ack and MiriCouple
over a year ago

Portsmouth

A babysitter lol

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields

As an single man previously, I was put off by the risk of not getting in due to ratio etc.

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By *ab365XMan
over a year ago

Paisley

I’ll need to make some Fab friends just to go along some time.

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By *illyandjamesCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

Another couple to go with to ease us into it

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Definitely a newbie only night would have convinced us to try sooner.

We’d heard stories about clubs being very clique and that put us off.

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