FabSwingers.com forum: Polite no or ignore

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As a single male I Total understand you can't be everyone's cuppa tea aha but don't get why people both singles and couples just blank you after exchanging messages? I'd much rather a polite or non polite no aha at least then I can wish you happy fabbing?

Does any respone with a no? Or would you rather ignore and delete?

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

They've decided they are not interested.

That's simply it. Accept it and just move on. No one has to explain anything and I'm sure everyone on here starts a conversation with others that just dries up and never goes anywhere.

Not worth getting upset about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/08/22 00:30:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From a women's point of view, it is quite hard to message everyone back, generally get between 50-100 messages per day so to try and respond to all is impossible, I have put in my bio if I haven't responded please take that as a polite no (that's if anyone reads it)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah I completely get that when you're an attractive couple or single female the inbox must be in undated with messages... I'm on about if you have or are talking to someone would you say it a no that you not my type ect or just ignore?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh and for the record I don't get upset believe me hahaha .... I'm not one to cry over no reply

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By *an de LyonMan
over a year ago

welling

"As a single male I Total understand you can't be everyone's cuppa tea aha but don't get why people both singles and couples just blank you after exchanging messages? I'd much rather a polite or non polite no aha at least then I can wish you happy fabbing?

Does any respone with a no? Or would you rather ignore and delete? "

Polite no is always appreciated & I’d remove them off any hotlist or block them so I don’t go back a few months later & harass them or come across as a creep, but generally if you don’t get a reply in a week you kinda get the message (or should do)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A no often comes with abuse or cajoling though!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah I'm the same... but just thought I'd see what other people's thoughts were on the matter

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

"From a women's point of view, it is quite hard to message everyone back, generally get between 50-100 messages per day so to try and respond to all is impossible, I have put in my bio if I haven't responded please take that as a polite no (that's if anyone reads it)"

That's a fair response and understandable given the message volume.

That said, we have had a few cases lately where a lady has asked us to move the conversation off fab because "she's interested" onto another chat platform just to be promptly blanked after saying hello to each other on said platform.

That is most certainly time-wasting and and rude...but keeping it on fab and just not responding, not at all.

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By *an de LyonMan
over a year ago

welling

"A no often comes with abuse or cajoling though! "

That is the problem…for some men a ‘no’ is just a maybe or a try harder (it really shouldn’t be)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a fair response and understandable given the message volume.

That is most certainly time-wasting and and rude...but keeping it on fab and just not responding, not at all. "

What a time waster! what was the point in asking you guys to move to another platform, must be so frustrating for you ... I honestly don't get it

I prefer to stay on fab for awhile before moving to a different platform to try and avoid that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We usually reply politely if the message we receive is polite and worth replying to.

If it's one of the many one line messages then we ignore them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And completely understandable... never really understand why people think one liners would work aha

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By *reen as JadeCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire

We try and answer every message. X

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By *aith boyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

I agree with the OP. If ANYONE initiates a message then changes their mind, it should be a common courtesy to let the person know. Had exactly the same this evening.

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By *onksoozeCouple
over a year ago

Hertfordshire

I try to respond to most, politely, although, only if deserved. Crap messages get blunt replies. And those that think I'm joking or are bad losers, become sport lol.

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By *ncemoreroundthesunCouple
over a year ago

on the move

We've responded politely in the past but now usually ignore and block when it's clear they've made no effort to read our profile or just ignored the several pop ups that come when sending a message.

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By *rojan23Man
over a year ago

neverland

As a young guy on here I normally get ignored which is totally understandable, however clubs/parties are the way forward better socially In person then via messages I've found for myself

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

That's a fair response and understandable given the message volume.

That is most certainly time-wasting and and rude...but keeping it on fab and just not responding, not at all.

What a time waster! what was the point in asking you guys to move to another platform, must be so frustrating for you ... I honestly don't get it

I prefer to stay on fab for awhile before moving to a different platform to try and avoid that. "

It's a head scratcher to us but some people eh lol

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

"Yeah I completely get that when you're an attractive couple or single female the inbox must be in undated with messages... I'm on about if you have or are talking to someone would you say it a no that you not my type ect or just ignore?

Even in that scenario, people aren’t obliged to continue responding. It’s just how it is.

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By *aith boyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

"I agree with the OP. If ANYONE initiates a message then changes their mind, it should be a common courtesy to let the person know. Had exactly the same this evening. "

The couple iwas referring to, have just mailed and said had started playing, and I would be welcome next time.

Oops....??

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By *aughtyPuppyMan
over a year ago

SouthEast

Here I'm on my single profile, while my wife has a single profile and we both have a couples profile. I would say it's very different for each account. My wife's single account gets to many message to answer all, and if she's chatting to someone and they become pushy, intense, disrectful or give her any cause for concern she will just go radio silent rather than get into arguments. For my single account I will always reply to someone if a decent msg is sent but as a single bloke account I get far less traffic.. and I will always say not my type or close a convo if I'm not feeling it. On our couples account I think its situational. If we are chatting to a couple and find they are just addressing one of us or give us cause for concern we will usually end up fizzing out the convo naturally over a few days or say not for us and apologise.

On all accounts we will ignore messages like 'Hi, how are you' or 'meet now'

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Differently to many places, Fab nakes it very clear that no reply equals no thanks. Expect no reply as soon as a no thanks, to mean the same thing. We all have to accept this, to be using Fab. It's up to each of us to deal with it. Don't labour it, accept it as just that.

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By *tarkersandcrutchCouple
over a year ago

TELFORD

We respond to everyone. We do say a polite thanks but no thanks if the profile is not for us. Manners cost nothing

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By *onnyadtMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

I honestly don't mind, op.

I've sent messages without a reply and not replied to some. Convos go suddenly dead, maybe they're not feeling me after a few words, I was all up for a meet until the lady of a couple was a bit aggressive and I didn't reply again, these things happen.

Here's a good tip, delete every message you send, forget about them and any replies are a bonus

thick skin, ducks back approach around here, bud.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We respond to everyone. We do say a polite thanks but no thanks if the profile is not for us. Manners cost nothing "

Try doing that with 300+ messages a day though!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We respond to everyone. We do say a polite thanks but no thanks if the profile is not for us. Manners cost nothing "

"Manners maketh man". Lol

I'm with the OP.

When the couple have exchanged a few positive messages then they simply blank you, for no apparent reason, it is extremely rude.

I always assume they are tosses then and wouldn't want to meet anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I try to respond to most, politely, although, only if deserved. Crap messages get blunt replies. And those that think I'm joking or are bad losers, become sport lol. "

I’m the same, I try to be polite, but when someone doesn’t quite get it, a firm NO, followed by a block. I can appreciate for more popular member it can be hard to keep up with messages.

Maybe fab could introduce a ‘thank you but not for me button’ which sends a “thank you but we’re not a match” message and automatically blocks further messaging.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I have found that people have their reasons for not continuing to chat. Just because you may not see it does not mean they don't. I've stopped chatting when people can't hold a conversation without constantly bringing sex into everything or when they get pushy. I use to say or to them before and usually they would apologise but then in a while go back to the behaviour that put me off them.

Now I don't even bother chatting anymore if they do it again or if they have been too much in the first place I stop the chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What you have to remember is whether they tell you or ignore you it’s the same answer, so just accept & respect that and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I respond with a no thanks, I can be polite enough to now need to not respond. I’ve had no come back from that and I hope that will continue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it’s nicer when people take time to say no thank you , instead of just ignoring , gives off very superiority complex vibes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes I vanish unintentionally- I’ll be talking to someone and suddenly I get a massive influx of messages and I lose track of who I’m talking to.

I have 138 unread messages at the moment because I can’t keep up

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We often respond with a no thanks message. Sometimes we don't either because we intend to then forget or the person sending the message has completely ignored what our profit says.

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

If it’s a polite message then we reply with a polite no.

If it’s rude, sexual we just delete and block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think getting no reply to a first message is perfectly acceptable.

Its when you have exchanged a few messages and the replies just stop. I then dont know if they have just missed my message amongst all the other messages and think I haven't replied or have they just gone off me.

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