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First time in club

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By *pslad99 OP   Man
over a year ago

colchester

Ok thinking about going to swingers could on my own but I’m shitting a brick.

Just thinking what do I do just walk in get a drink sit in the corner lol.

Any advice would be ever so nice.

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people "

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in the same position- as a single guy !!

For us it is a new experience- for the club it is very very deja vu!

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

See if the club has a newbie or a party night. Then it’ll just feel like any other type of club you’ve been too.

Let the owners know it’s your first time and they should show you around and explain the rules.

Most clubs have a separate place for socialising and play, so explore and see what happens.

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting. "

Why is it impossible

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands


"Ok thinking about going to swingers could on my own but I’m shitting a brick.

Just thinking what do I do just walk in get a drink sit in the corner lol.

Any advice would be ever so nice."

If you sit in a corner you'll probably be on your own all night. Have a walk around the club (don't follow people), say hello to people, pay the odd compliment. It may sound cheesy, but "Have you been here before?" is another line that may start a conversation. Some will be happy to chat, some not so much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pick a quiet day in your local club for your first time. Expect no playtime but instead get a feel of the layout of the place and become familiar with your surroundings. Chat to the bar staff and explain what you're looking for etc and build a rapour up. They might be able to introduce you to ppl who are looking for single guys. Be respectful at all times and I'm sure when you go back for a 2nd visit you will be more confident and this will show. Pm if you want to chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know what you mean by that. It's just natural to be shitting yourself. Once you are in and start chatting to people and maybe have a few drinks you will be surprised how many people will be glad to chat to you and whatever else lol. Go for it m8

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible"

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed.

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By *uchislife66Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "

I agree it can be difficult

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By *uchislife66Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "

What a great profile by the way

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "

The club you've been to doesn't sound very friendly. Most swingers are friendly and will have a chat even if they don't want to play. You can often tell by eye contact who may be up for a chat and maybe more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "

We’ve only been to Cupids once but found it easy to talk to people.

It’s usually easier to strike up a conversation when getting a drink at the bar rather than just approaching someone who has sat down or is walking around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed.

The club you've been to doesn't sound very friendly. Most swingers are friendly and will have a chat even if they don't want to play. You can often tell by eye contact who may be up for a chat and maybe more."

The club we have been to is extremely friendly. Well the staff are anyway. Really nice ladies who work there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "
maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe

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By *uchislife66Man
over a year ago

Leeds

All positive

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough

Hello lovely!

Go for it!

I love going to clubs!!!

My default club is townhouse and is run to such a high standard!

However just depends where you are thinking to go?

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. "

I’ve never had that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe "

Think we will but seriously how do you go up to someone and start chatting to them. Personally we have found it hard to read people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe

Think we will but seriously how do you go up to someone and start chatting to them. Personally we have found it hard to read people. "
sounds like the situation most single men face,: the fear of rejection. Ask if it's ok to join them the chances are they'll be grateful for the company aswell. Small talk will lead to fab talk it always does

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe

Think we will but seriously how do you go up to someone and start chatting to them. Personally we have found it hard to read people. "

You don’t need to read people, I would say go with the idea of it being a social night and if you happen to click with a person or persons that you want to play with the chemistry is there!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe

Think we will but seriously how do you go up to someone and start chatting to them. Personally we have found it hard to read people.

You don’t need to read people, I would say go with the idea of it being a social night and if you happen to click with a person or persons that you want to play with the chemistry is there!!

"

That's what this post is talking about. It's not simple as you seem to make out to go and chat to people.

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough

Would you chat to someone if you was in a queue, or chat to people in a vanilla bar! In a restaurant???

It really is no different!

I recommended trying a club that is run very well and you have buddies and staff to chat too as well…

I have been on the scene for four years and very social however not everyone I chat to I want to play with but swinging is a social scene

Playing is a bonus

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough


"Tell them it’s your first time. Get chatting to people

You say get chatting to people. It's not that easy. We're relatively new and been in Cupid's a few times and it's almost impossible to go up to a single or couple and start chatting.

Why is it impossible

Because everybody isn't in there for the same reason. If you go and sit next to someone and start talking to them they will take great pleasure in telling you to get stuffed. maybe try another club. There's one just round the corner to the one mentioned. It's couples and single ladies on Tues eve so try and see how you get on. See you in there maybe

Think we will but seriously how do you go up to someone and start chatting to them. Personally we have found it hard to read people.

You don’t need to read people, I would say go with the idea of it being a social night and if you happen to click with a person or persons that you want to play with the chemistry is there!!

That's what this post is talking about. It's not simple as you seem to make out to go and chat to people. "

Just read your profile!

If you are looking a single female!

Then couples and single females nights are the event for you!

Townhouse runs some amazing events! And they take care of new people xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only been to a couple of clubs, but I found it really easy to strike up a conversation with multiple random people. While you do find the odd weirdo who has no social skills, the vast majority are very friendly!

If it's something you're interested in, I'd recommend taking the plunge and going for it. It could be the next best thing since sliced cheese!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've only been to a couple of clubs, but I found it really easy to strike up a conversation with multiple random people. While you do find the odd weirdo who has no social skills, the vast majority are very friendly!

If it's something you're interested in, I'd recommend taking the plunge and going for it. It could be the next best thing since sliced cheese! "

That's the thing. We was in a club and absolutely nobody made eye contact with us. Maybe if they had might of gone and chatted with them.

If anything we felt like we was getting looked down on. We have only been to a club a few times so regulars in there knew we was new.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've only been to a couple of clubs, but I found it really easy to strike up a conversation with multiple random people. While you do find the odd weirdo who has no social skills, the vast majority are very friendly!

If it's something you're interested in, I'd recommend taking the plunge and going for it. It could be the next best thing since sliced cheese!

That's the thing. We was in a club and absolutely nobody made eye contact with us. Maybe if they had might of gone and chatted with them.

If anything we felt like we was getting looked down on. We have only been to a club a few times so regulars in there knew we was new. "
try adam and eves on Tues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/22 21:22:55]

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By *andystick72Man
over a year ago

kinky Street

Go in have a walk around check out where everything is ,grab a drink and don't sit on the dead seats lol everyclub has them lol and honestly just be yourself, expect nothing antisipate everything, oh and don't forget your lov socks ,enjoy and you can thank me later ,, chams is a good club

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots


"Ok thinking about going to swingers could on my own but I’m shitting a brick.

Just thinking what do I do just walk in get a drink sit in the corner lol.

Any advice would be ever so nice."

Some good advice in this thread...definitely don't sit in a corner...chat to people the same as you would in a pub or anywhere else for that matter and just take it from there. Don't make the first time you approach someone when they are having sex...probably won't be appreciated.

From reading a few comments it sounds like people have had bad experiences so do your research and pick a club that would suit you. In over 20 years of going to clubs I have never experienced unfriendly behaviour...doesn't mean everyone will want to have sex with you though.

Good luck

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By *ig Boy FunMan
over a year ago

Camden

Go for it, but what I would suggest is just try start chatting to people than sitting in a corner, let people know it your first time is a good conversation starter. At sometime someone will say "do want to play?" and just go with the flow.

Hope you have a good first time!

I would also add do your research on club/event that you attend, try not pick one that is not organised too well and has imbalanced guest list, becuase then you might get lost to dominate types.

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By *mMrbrightsideMan
over a year ago

wakefield

I was the same, wanted to go to a club but shitting myself. One night plucked up enough courage but couldn’t quite make it out of the car to walk in the club, by the time I’d talked myself round I must have been sitting in there for hours as when I walked in she said they were closing in half an hour (true story) but I went back got shown around and had a drink, game of pool and spoke to people. First time is a bit daunting but we’ve all been there and there’s nothing to be worried about. I still go by myself to quest every now and again, this time though it doesn’t take me as long to get out of the car lol

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