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Sub girls for Black Guys

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it.

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By *aveyDipperMan
over a year ago

Teesside


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it."

Probably reading too much into it. Are you implying non white girls like to dominate more than white? From my experience it’s not the colour but the personality that gets peoples attention. Perhaps you pick a common personality type?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it.

Probably reading too much into it. Are you implying non white girls like to dominate more than white? From my experience it’s not the colour but the personality that gets peoples attention. Perhaps you pick a common personality type? "

I'm actually not even talking about non-white girls tbh, just it always seems when I meet a white girl who's into me she's always down for bdsm and is very submissive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably more a combination of what you are looking for (maybe you like sub girls and subconsciously filter out more dominant personalities) and your physical build. People tend to assume big guys are naturally dominant.

Ever thought though it may not be “submissive” but rather women attracted to a more traditional blue pink dynamic in sex or dating? Just hypothesising

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it."

Bit difficult to answer as you could really only answer your question if you're a white sub woman.

I suppose if a subby woman wants a dom bloke that's what they'll look for, if they want a black dom, again that's what they'll look for. As the poster above say's, if you're meeting sub women then that's what you'll find.

If women are just looking for a decent play (non d/s) they'll find someone to suit again. There's plenty who aren't sub.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it.

Probably reading too much into it. Are you implying non white girls like to dominate more than white? From my experience it’s not the colour but the personality that gets peoples attention. Perhaps you pick a common personality type?

I'm actually not even talking about non-white girls tbh, just it always seems when I meet a white girl who's into me she's always down for bdsm and is very submissive. "

let them take the lead a bit and see where a meet leads..

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By *ukkake coupleCouple
over a year ago

herts

Think porn has a lot to do with some dynamics. Each to their own but some times it’s very fake.

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By *ylvieMWoman
over a year ago

Aylesbury

I am fairly submissive. If I were to seek you out it would be because I would assume because of your build, I would able be thrown around the bedroom, which is a massive plus for me usually.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Probably more a combination of what you are looking for (maybe you like sub girls and subconsciously filter out more dominant personalities) and your physical build. People tend to assume big guys are naturally dominant.

Ever thought though it may not be “submissive” but rather women attracted to a more traditional blue pink dynamic in sex or dating? Just hypothesising "

Interesting to think about, so yea it could be that indeed tbh, thanks for the insight

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I am fairly submissive. If I were to seek you out it would be because I would assume because of your build, I would able be thrown around the bedroom, which is a massive plus for me usually. "

Yea I get that alot tbh, so yea maybe it's because of my built.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hard to make out any trends unfortunately without taking a full fledged survey. I am a submissive myself and have been to kink parties. I have seen the exact opposite to be true too. Many black/Asian women submitting to white men.

As someone said above, it could be due to the fact that you have a really muscular build, something which works well for dominant men.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I’m more submissive in bed for all men. Just prefer someone who takes and demands control and love rough sex.

But would never be a “sub”.

I know what you mean though, my inbox is usually full of men claiming to be Dom/ alpha/ bull because they think it’s what we want to hear.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m more submissive in bed for all men. Just prefer someone who takes and demands control and love rough sex.

But would never be a “sub”.

I know what you mean though, my inbox is usually full of men claiming to be Dom/ alpha/ bull because they think it’s what we want to hear. "

Yea, I see that. Sometimes the women won't know they're sub or even much of the bdsm lifestyle but they'll say things like they want me to dominate then in bed, be very rough or they'll say they're very submissive even if they aren't all about that kink life

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"I’m more submissive in bed for all men. Just prefer someone who takes and demands control and love rough sex.

But would never be a “sub”.

I know what you mean though, my inbox is usually full of men claiming to be Dom/ alpha/ bull because they think it’s what we want to hear.

Yea, I see that. Sometimes the women won't know they're sub or even much of the bdsm lifestyle but they'll say things like they want me to dominate then in bed, be very rough or they'll say they're very submissive even if they aren't all about that kink life"

Different words mean different things to different people dont they!

I’m quite into pain and kink so I’m quite clear I’ll never be a sub, but am submissive. Not everyone understands the difference though x

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Theyre fetishising you

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

Mrs N is sub to a point, go past that point and you'll be sure to see her worklife alpha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm white and sub. I don't think I've ever thought about race and Doms very much but I don't automatically think a black guy will be dominant anymore than I'd think that about a white guy. I don't know you, but most men who are real Doms have a certain vibe. If you're giving that off, submissive women will be attracted to that.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

What aspects of the BDSM lifestyle are they looking for?

What do you give them?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What aspects of the BDSM lifestyle are they looking for?

What do you give them?"

Normal stuff, they want rough sex, open to being tied up, love being spanked, hair pulled, can't type the others as I won't be able to post this lol but yea a lot of the basics I guess

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Mrs N is sub to a point, go past that point and you'll be sure to see her worklife alpha. "

Lol, point noted

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

Recognising that there is a fetishism around black 'dominants' and white 'submissives' and that covers gay and trans people, and also dominant black women, but which can be parked for this conversation.

I think the real question is more over the definition of dominant. There are some that use it in the dictionary definition as someone who automatically takes control. However, in my experience it tends to be those with a sex doll and or house service view of submissives, hold this view. The view cuts across race with white dominants holding that view.

This also ties in with what I call the James Bond view of dominance of the male that is instantly powerful.

The modern view of a dominant is someone in a power exchange relationship of caring and support. The dominance occurs when there is consent for the dominance to occur, it is not taken. (Although following the James Bond view some people want to be taken).

I am someone who rolls his eyes when I see the statement 'bdsm is not just about pain' and wish people would say ' bdsm is not just about sex'.

Everybody does their kink/bdsm differently, and for some sex is part of how they express themselves. But from a personal point of view the concentration on vanilla sex under the guise of bdsm is mundane.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it."

I would say that white women who are "into" black men exclusively are a certain type of woman, hold a certain type of mentality and fixed beliefs and are therefore interested in a certain type of thing. It's either animalistic or you're off their radar. There is rarely any nuance or inbetween

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By *xford_geekCouple
over a year ago

Cotswolds

I wouldnt say I'm totally sub, I have strict rule that I want a guy to adhere to, but at same time I want the guy to take control and fuck me hard.

I guess as I have a partner you want a man who will take control of the sex and give you something different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m naturally submissive in the bedroom both with my husband & any partners that we introduce into our sex life.

I prefer a man to take control of proceedings & me, however I don’t like any form of pain so not into extremes

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By *elly2000Couple
over a year ago

City

I'm a sub, and I would never change it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Recognising that there is a fetishism around black 'dominants' and white 'submissives' and that covers gay and trans people, and also dominant black women, but which can be parked for this conversation.

I think the real question is more over the definition of dominant. There are some that use it in the dictionary definition as someone who automatically takes control. However, in my experience it tends to be those with a sex doll and or house service view of submissives, hold this view. The view cuts across race with white dominants holding that view.

This also ties in with what I call the James Bond view of dominance of the male that is instantly powerful.

The modern view of a dominant is someone in a power exchange relationship of caring and support. The dominance occurs when there is consent for the dominance to occur, it is not taken. (Although following the James Bond view some people want to be taken).

I am someone who rolls his eyes when I see the statement 'bdsm is not just about pain' and wish people would say ' bdsm is not just about sex'.

Everybody does their kink/bdsm differently, and for some sex is part of how they express themselves. But from a personal point of view the concentration on vanilla sex under the guise of bdsm is mundane.

"

Very interesting and insightful, thanks for the contribution to the discussion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Due to my job I’m quite strict at work but so sub in normal life x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it."

Great question as I’ve had these thoughts but put it down to me reading too much into it. However I think it has a combination of what we unconsciously attract as I prefer “submissive” women in the bedroom but very confident and dominant outside of it, which can be hard to find but that’s the type of woman I attract and go for.

I don’t think the colour aspect has anything to do with it as I’ve met with very submissive black women too. I also think that prom has a lot to answer for as a lot of those dynamics tried to get played out in the real world and as we know it doesn’t always work like that. Lol

Great thread though, interesting answers. Happy Fabbing

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Due to my job I’m quite strict at work but so sub in normal life x"

Are you in a supervisory role by chance?

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By *onnyadtMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter


"Ever since coming to the UK almost 3 years ago, one thing I've noticed. Most of the white women who are into me (in person, not just online dating) are very submissive by nature. I always wanted why? Like do white girls who are subs seek out black guys because they think they're predominantly alpha/Dom. Or it doesn't matter and I'm reading touch into it.

I would say that white women who are "into" black men exclusively are a certain type of woman, hold a certain type of mentality and fixed beliefs and are therefore interested in a certain type of thing. It's either animalistic or you're off their radar. There is rarely any nuance or inbetween "

Nah! That's just the stereotype. Believe me the difference in types of women are as varied and from all aspects of life. Farmers daughters to posh Mayfair city types and all inbetween.

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