FabSwingers.com forum: Kinky top guy

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People seem to use all sorts of meanings for things now - but I would interpret it to mean:

Kinky - bdsm type sex and can include strange fetishes.

Top - the dominant partner that gives the action (bottom would be receiver)

Guy - male

By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

A slight a refinement (taken from Wikipedia) to the comment above.

"In BDSM, top can mean either a dominant partner in BDSM play (such as flogging, binding, being master, humiliating, and sexual play), or a partner who applies stimulation to another, and who may or may not be dominant.'

One of my pet peeves is in a number of threads, people describe themselves as dominant,but they actually applying stimulation (usually sexual) at the bottom's (and usually her husband's) request. To my mind that is topping, as there is no real power exchange occurring. I say that as my FL description is currently rope top.

To give a real life example on Friday night I lightly flogged three women at an event. I enjoy doing it but I was not being dominant, I was doing it to give them a pleasurable experience of flogging. I was working well within their limits (which were well below my limits in D/S relationship), so I was topping. I compare topping to being a ronin and not a samurai.

For completeness I would mention service topping. This is usually where a submissive tops another submissive to help scratch the bottom submissive's subby itch. Sometimes they will swap, but some submissives have absolutely no inclination to dom or top but need 'dominant' style stimulation from time to time.