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I got ukranian refugee

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

35 year old male guy. Not told him I swing yet, is the best way to tell him at a party deep end? I think I should what you guys think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe dont tell him for a while, he might not understand your lifestyle choice, wait to see any cues from him as to how he would understand it all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think you might be right. I just never thought it through when I decided to do it. I still want to be naughty but now my hands are tied.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hopefully you didnt invite him over solely to seduce him.. life is confusing and traumatic enough in a warzone

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No not to seduce him at all. I did it for the right reasons. I'm ex military I had a spare room it was the right thing to fo. I just didn't stop to think I couldn't host parties anymore. That's a big loss, I love them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ahh my mistake! Sorry! Maybe just tell him now then that you have a girl coming round later tomorrow or whatever and does he mind.. gives him the choice to stay in or go out then!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good on you for hosting mate, was in Ukraine with hospitalers battalion, ex linseed lancer, poss going back soon, so many need help

T

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes that's the best bet. I'm sure he will understand

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes they do. I had spare room, being ex military myself it was either go fight or take someone in. I couldn't stand by and do nothing whilst complaining about it at the same time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What reg where you mate 22yrs ramc WO1

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I was Tatical comes RAF 7 years. When I was a young pup

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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago

Welling

Nationality doesn’t really matter. Just common sense says you’d better tell him about your lifestyle and ask him directly if he is ok with you hosting a couple or single swingers. If no underage lives with him I don’t see a reason to ask on opinion.

P.S. I am originally from Ukraine have been living here for 7+ years. You can message me if any questions or help needed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/05/22 07:24:06]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"35 year old male guy. Not told him I swing yet, is the best way to tell him at a party deep end? I think I should what you guys think?"

What? You’re really considering throwing a swingers party when there’s someone their escaping war? And even worse, you’re planning on not telling them and just surprising them with it?

Also - isn’t there a ban on men leaving Ukraine? Something doesn’t add up…

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By *ussybagderMan
over a year ago

Salford

Just why ?

And why in the world u taking him part n stuff

Give him a break for the first 6 months see what he likes to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would imagine the poor guy is just looking for a safe place to stay, maybe relax & try get his head together. Right now your sex life isn't at the top of his list. It's no different to a single guy bringing a 1 night stand back. Maybe accommodate his needs for a while first. Tbh it wouldn't even cross my mind to have a conversation with a refugee about my sex life, I'd be focused on getting him settled in and make sure he has everything he needs, mentally and emotionally as well as the spare room

Mrs

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West


"I would imagine the poor guy is just looking for a safe place to stay, maybe relax & try get his head together. Right now your sex life isn't at the top of his list. It's no different to a single guy bringing a 1 night stand back. Maybe accommodate his needs for a while first. Tbh it wouldn't even cross my mind to have a conversation with a refugee about my sex life, I'd be focused on getting him settled in and make sure he has everything he needs, mentally and emotionally as well as the spare room

Mrs"

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

Your status reads as though he is spoiling your fun. Maybe have a think about what he’s been through rather than your sex life. Jeez

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By *oxyLady200Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Indeed, totally rediculous. OP give yourself a tap on the back for the Jackanory award 2022

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why even tell him, seems wierd you need to do this

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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago

Welling


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?"

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your status reads as though he is spoiling your fun. Maybe have a think about what he’s been through rather than your sex life. Jeez "
totally agree ……I think this is a wind up though ….. nobody could be this fu@@ing stupid jeeez lol

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

What are you thinking! Give your head a wobble

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

How long had you been hosting parties ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law. "

What kind of exceptions?

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

Priorities.

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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago

Welling


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law.

What kind of exceptions? "

For example you are not fit for military service for whatever reason and have this certified by authorities.

Or you have 3 kids under age of 18 doesn’t necessarily need to leave with them.

And few more

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law.

What kind of exceptions? "

Essentially you have to stay unless you have three or more children under 18 that you are financially supporting, you are a single father or the if you have children/ are a guardian of a child with disabilities.

Basically if you can fight or help then you stay.

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

Well done on taking in a refugee. You can continue with the Swinging lifestyle by attending clubs or going to hotels or other people's parties. Don't even consider having anyone back to your place whilst you have the refugee with you. You made a serious commitment when you took him in and must put him first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law.

What kind of exceptions?

For example you are not fit for military service for whatever reason and have this certified by authorities.

Or you have 3 kids under age of 18 doesn’t necessarily need to leave with them.

And few more "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought Ukrainian martial law banned men between 18 and 60 from leaving the country. How can a 35 year old male be a refugee?

In general yea, but there are exceptions allowed by the same law.

What kind of exceptions?

Essentially you have to stay unless you have three or more children under 18 that you are financially supporting, you are a single father or the if you have children/ are a guardian of a child with disabilities.

Basically if you can fight or help then you stay."

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Personally I say keep you private life private. He's come to escape not to join in your sex festival (a bit Partridge). It's very inappropriate, especially when someone is on the back foot in a new country anyway. And is he even single or has he got a partner or kids to worry about somewhere? Most people are not swingers or want that trust on them.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

At least it's not a Ukrainian woman you've taken in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ukrainians are generally religious and/ or a little conservative, so I doubt swinging is all the rage there. Maybe keep it to yourself and arrange meets elsewhere? Just my thoughts

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By *n_thy_kneesMan
over a year ago

Ipswich


"I would imagine the poor guy is just looking for a safe place to stay, maybe relax & try get his head together. Right now your sex life isn't at the top of his list. It's no different to a single guy bringing a 1 night stand back. Maybe accommodate his needs for a while first. Tbh it wouldn't even cross my mind to have a conversation with a refugee about my sex life, I'd be focused on getting him settled in and make sure he has everything he needs, mentally and emotionally as well as the spare room

Mrs"

THIS

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By *n_thy_kneesMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

I mean your status "Got Ukranian refugee in spare room. Kind of spoils the vibe, can I still host, not tried it yet?"

Kinda spoils the vibe???? SERIOUSLY!?

Good on you for taking him in, but just try an imagine what he's going through right now. You can always not accom, go to a club etc. And I'm sure your sex life isn't his main concern right now.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

All those parties, and you're at one verification?

What is the word I'm thinking of...

Ah yes. I remember.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"At least it's not a Ukrainian woman you've taken in"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you hosted many parties?

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"All those parties, and you're at one verification?

What is the word I'm thinking of...

Ah yes. I remember.

"

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By *anAdeleCouple
over a year ago

northeast


"35 year old male guy. Not told him I swing yet, is the best way to tell him at a party deep end? I think I should what you guys think?"
100% tell him when everyone arrives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean your status alone is concerning, the tone of it, saying having the refugee is the spare room is spoiling the vibe. I take it you did this purely for the money? Sounds like you have not thought this through enough with your own lifestyle and privacy.

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By *izandpaulCouple
over a year ago

merseyside


"35 year old male guy. Not told him I swing yet, is the best way to tell him at a party deep end? I think I should what you guys think?"

Think it best you keep it to yourself.

He could view your offer to accommodate him as a start of sexual grooming.

I'd keep your sex life and preferences private, if you mention this to him and he trots off down to speak to the police you could find yourself at best in an embarrassing interview at worse...well have a guess.

Well done for offering him a home.

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West


"I mean your status alone is concerning, the tone of it, saying having the refugee is the spare room is spoiling the vibe. I take it you did this purely for the money? Sounds like you have not thought this through enough with your own lifestyle and privacy."

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"At least it's not a Ukrainian woman you've taken in"

Thank God

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