FabSwingers.com forum: How did you persuade your partner to play first time?

By *oobysinmancunia OP Couple
over a year ago

Partington

M or F partners that were reticent how did you get them to play.

Alcohol and a sexy body got my wife over the line.

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By *ocky82Man
over a year ago

Watford

Following

I wish I could get mine to play

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By *oobysinmancunia OP Couple
over a year ago

Partington

We had discussed it at length but could not get over the first meet. It was not pre planned that we would stitch up my wife. We put ourselves in a position where it might happen and lowered each other inhibitions but the decision was always hers.

It had to be her decision. Seriously getting people either sex paralytic to enjoy your fantasy is a HUGE NO NO.

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By *vening SongCouple
over a year ago

diss

Dinner round friends house one night she went up stairs came down naked and c took to her like a pro lol rest is history !!

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

No persuasion necessary on either side. If it had been we wouldn't be swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shouldn't need to persuade..maybe just talk about the idea of..

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By *landfordfabbersCouple
over a year ago

Blandford ish

"No persuasion necessary on either side. If it had been we wouldn't be swinging. "

Exactly,

If he or she isn’t into the idea you leave it and move on. You might find the idea grows in their head and it gets brought up again in the future but you shouldn’t bully someone into it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Attended a club and couldn’t wait to join x

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By *etro1940sCouple
over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

"No persuasion necessary on either side. If it had been we wouldn't be swinging.

Exactly,

If he or she isn’t into the idea you leave it and move on. You might find the idea grows in their head and it gets brought up again in the future but you shouldn’t bully someone into it"

Totally agree - each person in a couple needs to "buy in" to the idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m

Guessing that there either has to be the potential there in the first place with relaxed and high sex drives on all parts so that a situation can unfold naturally or you have to talk in advance. If neither is comfortable then it won’t happen and probably shouldn’t happen either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people are just a hard "no" from the outset, and you have to accept that.

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By *ooneyCouple
over a year ago

Chester

A weekend away with another couple in a caravan, they had become and still are friends and invited us away for the weekend. In all fairness the husband Couple warned us about his wife that she was a predatory, we discussed what could happen prior to accepting the offer to go. The first night a few drinks and yes it happened, he was a cuck that was a surprise and she was into both of us, we did not have full on that occasion and we had set our limits prior, regardless of the other wife’s agenda.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We had discussed it at length but could not get over the first meet. It was not pre planned that we would stitch up my wife. We put ourselves in a position where it might happen and lowered each other inhibitions but the decision was always hers.

It had to be her decision. Seriously getting people either sex paralytic to enjoy your fantasy is a HUGE NO NO.

Loads of pissed up women at clubs. The men don't care.

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By *oobysinmancunia OP Couple
over a year ago

Partington

Foe certain.

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By *oobysinmancunia OP Couple
over a year ago

Partington

[Removed by poster at 22/02/22 09:46:57]

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By *oobysinmancunia OP Couple
over a year ago

Partington

The men walk a tightrope then! Being pissed is not consent.

I added my second comment on the thread to make it clear we had discussed it and were both intrigued. We just found that first "action" difficult to start off. Perhaps how people get past their nerves on a first meet is a more pertinent phrasing of the question.

My wife had body issues when we met at 18, she was a size 8-10 and had a stunning body but no confidence in herself.

We have got past that now and have some really fun times but it came forward again as we tried to dip our toe in.

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By *eventysixCouple
over a year ago

glossop

Put my cards on the table when we first met. She is still here and loving it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No persuading needed thank goodness.

Simply a matter of turning joint fantasies into reality.

And a lot of honest and open communication.

Viv

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By *igboobstCouple
over a year ago

barrow

We both loved the idea of swinging from the onset of our relationship so we just went from there, no persuasion needed from either side

xxx

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

[Removed by poster at 22/02/22 15:00:23]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I threw a frisby and said fetch in a stern voice

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Luckily I Met my partner here over 6 years ago, so no persuasion needed on either side.

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By *lirtyAndFunCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

V had always wanted to watch me being fucked by other guys & i have always been flirty but i was still not into the whole idea of setting up meets with strangers.

We started with me just kissing other guys at nightclubs & messing around.

V then explained it as seeing as i cant get enough sex & he wants to watch me, if we used this site it would be like the nightclub scenario except i could chat to & arrange to meet guys i really liked.

Its worked out amazing for us so far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We just done alot of talking and role playing in the bedroom and watching porn together talking about the other guy taking control of her turns us both on alot . I'm ready to probably take the next step into reality but as we have youngish children we have to wait a bit unfortunately. She's anxious she said that's the only thing stopping her on her side but I guess overtime she will overcome that

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By *ornysquirtingcoupleCouple
over a year ago

somerset

We talk about it allot during sex then my wife suggested we try it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I first married, my then wife was a right horny bugger and it was her who introduced me the adult dating/swinging and through those early years, we both realised we where/are Bisexual (and kinky) so pretty well ended up only ever meeting either singles or couples who had to be Bi

The rest is history as they say lol

J xx

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By *reestylingWoman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire

We discussed it repeatedly whilst playing and somehow it led to reality. We were lucky as the first couple we played with were very patient and we started with a wonderful experience. We are very relaxed now and both of us are encouraged to have lovers or mmm/muffins fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Persuasion is not really conducive to a healthy start to swinging. It should be mutual desire. Of course there's probably a lot of people out there who were indeed persuaded and it turned out to be the best thing they ever did, but it doesn't make it right that they were goaded on board to start with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We discussed it repeatedly whilst playing and somehow it led to reality. We were lucky as the first couple we played with were very patient and we started with a wonderful experience. We are very relaxed now and both of us are encouraged to have lovers or mmm/muffins fun.

That's kind of where we are at . Keep discussing whilst playing everytime we do it

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By *herryEatersCouple
over a year ago

East Cheshire

"M or F partners that were reticent how did you get them to play.

Alcohol and a sexy body got my wife over the line. "

Lol I wouldn't say reluctant but Cherry dumped me a few months after meeting as she thought I was too 'proper' to be interested in the swinging lifestyle she was already a part of.... Boy was she wrong, I put her straight, we got back together immediately and dived straight in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Persuasion is not really conducive to a healthy start to swinging. It should be mutual desire. Of course there's probably a lot of people out there who were indeed persuaded and it turned out to be the best thing they ever did, but it doesn't make it right that they were goaded on board to start with."

Agreed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great to read the comments on here

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"No persuading needed thank goodness.

Simply a matter of turning joint fantasies into reality.

And a lot of honest and open communication.

Viv "

Exactly this

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By *atureandhornyCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

I set her up

oh what a night.

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By *iveshowcouple2Couple
over a year ago

Manchester

I didn’t have to persuade her. She was begging for the opportunity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My first wife it happened a bit accidentally. The internet was still in its infancy back in the bloatedgoat days. I signed up for an account on a swinging account not really knowing what it was about and naively put our actual email addresses in.

Not surprisingly she woke up the next day to a veritable litany of emails - instead of throwing her toys out the pram she informed me she was off to get shagged on Saturday night

She went - did as promised and so started over 2 years of not terrible experiences.

This time around when we first met there was a sense of a naughty side from both of us and it didn't take us long to start discussing deeper and deeper fantasies and previous experiences which line up startlingly well

Now we just need to go through the list in a timely and organised fashion

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By *isty286Couple
over a year ago

Dorset

It had nothing to do with persuasion, we just both enjoyed sex and would talk about things we would like to try, often I would whisper in her ear about things we could try while fingering her pussy,as we were snuggled up together at night, if my hand got a lot wetter I knew my little story interested her, we just took it from there, it's how I discovered just how much of an exhibitionist she really was.

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By *oaby big bawsMan
over a year ago

angus

She persuaded me haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I planted the seed in the wife's head years ago by telling her the thought of seeing her with another man would be a massive turn on, after the shock we had the conversation about was it so I could fuck other ladies, when she was assured it wasn't we slowly entered the swinging scene and we've had some amazing times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mutual agreement after a conversation about fantasies and finding out we had very similar taste.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Recieved a text message saying being pregnant has got her so horny and last few nights she had dirty dreams, which was her with other men.

Quick Google and replied with a answer of swingers club night. 3 days later we went to club and fulfilled both our fantasies x

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By *aveing funCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

Bedroom talk fantasy turned into reality never looked back

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By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

"I planted the seed in the wife's head years ago by telling her the thought of seeing her with another man would be a massive turn on, after the shock we had the conversation about was it so I could fuck other ladies, when she was assured it wasn't we slowly entered the swinging scene and we've had some amazing times."

We were in a similar predicament, once I explained about what I wanted and answered all the questions surrounding it she understood a bit more and we made some progress by coming on here and having a social. Unfortunately it just died off in the end, if one person isn't 100% in to it then its likely going to happen. I keep the profile active just to browse and hopefully we progress in the future but I will have to see what happens..

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
51 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

[Removed by poster at 04/01/24 12:46:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

"No persuasion necessary on either side. If it had been we wouldn't be swinging. "

This 100 percent

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By *restonCouple555Couple
51 weeks ago

preston

I always say that I am a woman of my word and swinging is no different apparently. We have been married over 10 years and I had never considered it until i spontaneously brought up the idea of going to a club and having sex in front of other people. Husband was nicely surprised and the conversations quickly turned into ‘well…. If we are there, would you like to play with other people’, which got us both horny. Due to various life commitments it then took us s few months to get to a club but on our first visit we did a soft swap and second visit a few weeks later a full swap. Now we are planning all sorts of meets and events!

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
51 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

If I had to persuade them then they wouldn't be my person.

If it's not a fuck yes, it's a fuck no

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By *ovelifecoupleCouple
51 weeks ago

North Yorks

"No persuasion necessary on either side. If it had been we wouldn't be swinging. "

Totally agree, talked about it a lot before going to La Chambre, and never looked back

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By *oxy jWoman
51 weeks ago

taunton somerset

we were honest about what we wanted sexually right from the start of our relationship 30++ years later we still are

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By *atureguy65Man
51 weeks ago

Dorchester

"M or F partners that were reticent how did you get them to play.

Alcohol and a sexy body got my wife over the line. "

Interesting profile issue is there's no set format for which is M and which is f. Often it's a guess by height, build.

there's an example in this thread of "c"

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By *eaSlutsCouple
51 weeks ago

Glasgow

We started out on our journey after doing the infamous online BDSM quiz then discussing our results.

We don't feel that persuasion should really be involved. That feels way too much like pressuring someone into something they're notn comfortable with for our liking...

C x

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By *ilthycoupleabzCouple
51 weeks ago

Aberdeen

"If I had to persuade them then they wouldn't be my person.

If it's not a fuck yes, it's a fuck no

This. It has to be enthusiastic consent and interest by all people involved or it isn't any good for anyone.

MrsAbz

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By *olfandtazCouple
51 weeks ago

Bristol

There was no persuading, I told her I used to swing and was into bdsm and she jumped at the chance to explore both lifestyles

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By *impcuckMan
51 weeks ago

edge of taunton

if you have to persuade then its going to be a rought ride or a break up .

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By *ilth N KinkCouple
51 weeks ago

Gloucester

We had a conversation on how we both used to swing with our previous partners and decided to enjoy it again together

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By *iveshowcouple2Couple
51 weeks ago

Manchester

"There was no persuading, I told her I used to swing and was into bdsm and she jumped at the chance to explore both lifestyles "

That’s pretty much the same with us.

Whilst she knew about my past swinging experiences with I was totally fooled by her good girl conservative image. It was a total shock when she started talking about her fantasies and literally begged me to (for lack of a more polite description) slut her out.

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By *4funXXXMan
51 weeks ago

cheshire

We where chatting about our pasts and after she told me about her boyfriend trying to take her virginity but she stopped him because he didn’t have any condoms but rubbed his cock over her pussy. I said to her I would have loved to have watched her get fucked. A few months later having chatted about it we started going to clubs. Took a few visits and some soft play with couples before I finally watched her fuck a guy. All her choices no pushing by me. She became a real hot wife.

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By *umbriaman1962Man
51 weeks ago

outside of penrith

With long since ex wife. Mid 90s so before Internet swinging adds

She aways enjoyed top shelf mags readers wives. adds for swinging.

Reading stories in mags.

We talked about fantasies etc joked about swapping partners

We put add in mag replies to box number. We swapped message pics with a couple a good hours drive away arranged to meet Forton service they did not turn up!! Later phone call say had puncture

Arranged second meet but said at pub near us met them came back out house still not sure if we would swap. Plenty wine and porn

Video rest is history

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By *avchaseCouple
51 weeks ago

Calne

Years ago I found a swinging site and got curious, but I had to create a profile to see the pictures. So created a couples profile without thinking it through. Then when a couple wanted to meet us, my bluff was called, as I had not said anything about this to the wife.

I owned up to the wife that a I had created a profile on a swingers site without her knowing and a couple wanted to meet us. The reply, "we had better go and meet them, then", still happily married and still here.

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By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

I told her my fantasy about watching her with another man and told her the next step was up to her, I didn't mention it again until she started to ask me questions..

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By *idcot58Man
51 weeks ago

Chepstow

I showed my mrs a contact mag a guy got back to us and we met up with him.at a sex party he had and second time at swingers club

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
51 weeks ago

Leeds

Didn't have to do any persuasion (I'd not be here if I did) we both decided who we wanted to meet and went from there.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

Thats true, we both were divided on this, I was wanting to do it to explore some of my fantasies and do things I know I like and 'A' wasn't sure about it all, we talked about it and joined here to try and progress things but it didn't really happen. I wouldn't push/persuade her in anyway to do something she wasn't comfortable with but on the flip side of that there is always going to be one of us who isn't 100% happy as we have a different interest when it comes to this type thing. Surprising seeing how many couples on here have agreed to it from an early stage and been on the same page as it is quite a 'niche' thing to do..

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By *fweonlymeettwiceMan
51 weeks ago

Madrid

Following with interest

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By *dswingersCouple
51 weeks ago

chelmsford

i (k) lady wanted to relight my bi side so spoke to hubby about it and here we are lol

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By *lowhands7Man
51 weeks ago

South Leicestershire

I convinced my ex to go to a club and that we would only play with each other and only in front of others when and if she was ready to.

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By *olfandtazCouple
51 weeks ago

Bristol

"There was no persuading, I told her I used to swing and was into bdsm and she jumped at the chance to explore both lifestyles

That’s pretty much the same with us.

Sounds very similar to what happened with us, Taz started talking about all the things she wanted to try and I just smiled and nodded alot

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By *onningtonplumberMan
51 weeks ago

Donnington

I was seeing an 18 year old when I was 38, she had a digital camera and we found that her parents had been using it and were swingers some interesting pics indeed. I suggested we should try swinging and loved it we were on here together for about 5byears had many good meets and a few trips to clubs

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By *fweonlymeettwiceMan
51 weeks ago

Madrid

Its been my long term fantasy to watch my wife getting fucked by another man, but I have got to accept thats its is unlikely to happen, even though we do roleplay about certain scenarios about other men fucking her sometimes its a stranger sometimes its about one of her exs fucking her. Having said my wife did say once if its going to happen their would have to be some attraction for her which I fully understand (but she is a fussy bitch lol) so it roleplay only I guess.

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By *obbiKentMan
51 weeks ago

maidstone

She invited a hot sexy guy, I could not resist joining them

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