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"At some point during the meet I guess the point of penetrative will happen, if said person wishes to lie and say "oh we don't normally do this but go ahead anyway......" without a lie detector test, what you supposed to do? There is the other side of things where they might ask "are you into breeding?" To which a horrified reply will happen or consent will happen, if you don't wish to risk your sexual health simply state Safe Sex Only. I've not been in many situations where a guy will insist on going bareback, in the moment, against my wishes. " You took our post the wrong way. We meant before the meet. We state on our profile that we only do safe sex and we don't meet couples/singles that play bareback even if they are OK to use condom with us. We just know the risk is bigger so we avoid that. But what about if they lie and say that they always play safe but they don't. We would like to know if that's really common or not... Sorry we replied in private by mistake. | |||
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"Can be classed as sexual assault if don't without consent I only play bareback when we are all in agreement " Yeah, we know that. But our English wasn't the best to explain what we meant. We mean before a meeting. When you ask the usual questions "Do you get tested?" "Do you play bareback?" so you can know the risks that the other person takes and you take you decision based on that. But if they lie to you, that mean you may be taking a risk that you don't feel comfortable with. | |||
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"Swinging is about having sex and if you meet people you are at an elevated risk. Bareback or not. I always have safe sex for that reason. I have to do what I think is right for me and I will always assume the other person _might_ have had bareback with others. That’s not a judgement on them - just a risk thing. I don’t think consent is the right way at looking at the problem." Obviously we know that this life style is risky when it comes to stds. We also know that some people will lie about their sexual health. But we thought that was a minority and most people take in consideration other people boundaries and health. But maybe we were naive... | |||
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"I like to be clear from the start. My name says exactly the kind of sex I am looking for. " Thats perfect. | |||
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"Swinging is about having sex and if you meet people you are at an elevated risk. Bareback or not. I always have safe sex for that reason. I have to do what I think is right for me and I will always assume the other person _might_ have had bareback with others. That’s not a judgement on them - just a risk thing. I don’t think consent is the right way at looking at the problem. Obviously we know that this life style is risky when it comes to stds. We also know that some people will lie about their sexual health. But we thought that was a minority and most people take in consideration other people boundaries and health. But maybe we were naive..." I don’t think you are naive but I think it is more common than people want to let on. I think it has definitely become more “acceptable” over the years. | |||
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"I like to be clear from the start. My name says exactly the kind of sex I am looking for. " Likewise, not here to mislead or deceive | |||
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"I always say I expect the sex to be bare when arranging meets. So it's all agreed and known up front xx" | |||
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"I like to be clear from the start. My name says exactly the kind of sex I am looking for. Likewise, not here to mislead or deceive " It’s pointless and can spoil the fun. Need to be always clear, then everyone knows where they stand. | |||
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