FabSwingers.com forum: 1st meet as a couple, finding a right male and overcoming jelousy

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So me and my partner have talked about returning to fab, previously we just cammed and never took it further.

Weve talked about going into 2022 and wanting to spice things up by trying new things, like inviting another male to join, either or both me watching or joining, or playing with another couple.

Ive read quite a few comments before about single men meeting a female/couple and after getting what they want becoming a bit of an asshole, how do you filter through these and find the respectful guys? We also dont want someone whos trying to secretly message her for meets or hassling for meets and fund but someone who respects her and mutually we all have fun and respect boundaries ect.

Also, having never playes with another male,female or couple between us the unknown od how we would feel and the reality of what weve done could be massively different to the feeling and thoughts we have (thinking its sexy, fun naughty ect) how do you control the situation of being jelous, qould you start with social meets and drinks first, then maybe start with oral meet and then go from there or would you dive straight in on the first meet?

Sorry its a long post, genuinely we do see both sides to fab and did previously experience rude men and time wasters hence why we never went further but do want to try it again as weve always talked about it and being in a long term relationship we do want to spice things up.

Feel free to dm if you would prefer to give private advice. Tia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Leave it up to her to find the other guy

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By *ubandsubCouple
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Ok, although we are a couple now, i have played as a single guy, as well as inviting guys to meet us. Personally we have never had issues if guys trying to contact her as everything comes through me. She can choose guys but she likes me to make the arrangements.

Re jealousy, we never had a issue, but everyone is different, start with what you are comfortable, be open with each other about what you both want out of it, set boundaries that you both agree to.

Most of all remember this is ment to be fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What works for us is to “ borrow” a partner ( male or female)who has consent to do so , you will find plenty who do but it takes a bit of sorting/ finding those with valid verifications . This is our opinion and what works for us . We wish you well and am sure you will be successful in your search

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Im ok with her searching for another guy, as shes the one who has to play with him not me. But thats not our issue our issue is, she wants to play with someone of a similar age range and not really too much older, but most single guys around our age or younger seem to just want their fuck and dont care (not everyone!)

Thanks for your advices, regarding jelousy its easy to think you wont get jelous becauwe its your fantasy and you want to try it, right? But the reality od your gf/wife having an intimate session with another guy when she hasnt done before how woukd we both feel is the unknown.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What is it you actually expect from the guy?

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By *eachesandtatCouple
over a year ago

Lancs

Just take it slow, babysteps at first, Femonfem play,then soft swap with opposite partners,then full swap, then if your ready maybe try meeting a single for a more intimate meet where the focus is more on her or you. Men overthink the Jelousy bit and I get it i'm a man myself, but once you both have gained some experience it really is just SEX and thats it. The sex you have with your partner is totally different to the sex with others, yer,group sex is horny as hell but it's horny as hell because it's so wrong its right if that makes sense, communication is KEY, lay out everything on the table what you both want from the experiences and get them, have a back up plan where if something goes a bit wrong treat it more as a learning curve then having a breakdown in your head lol. There is no right or wrong way to do this,EVERYBODY is different. Just make sure when you do it , you are both in a happy headspace together. Be warned tho it is super addicting. LOL

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just take it slow, babysteps at first, Femonfem play,then soft swap with opposite partners,then full swap, then if your ready maybe try meeting a single for a more intimate meet where the focus is more on her or you. Men overthink the Jelousy bit and I get it i'm a man myself, but once you both have gained some experience it really is just SEX and thats it. The sex you have with your partner is totally different to the sex with others, yer,group sex is horny as hell but it's horny as hell because it's so wrong its right if that makes sense, communication is KEY, lay out everything on the table what you both want from the experiences and get them, have a back up plan where if something goes a bit wrong treat it more as a learning curve then having a breakdown in your head lol. There is no right or wrong way to do this,EVERYBODY is different. Just make sure when you do it , you are both in a happy headspace together. Be warned tho it is super addicting. LOL"

Thanks alot really appreciated. Maybe meeting a couple 1st may be better then, so all 4 of us are playing or involved and nobody is "left out" as such.

I really enjoy her getting attention, and i often prefer her going out dressed sexy, heels ect as i know men will naturally look and/or compliment which makes her feel good and also makes me feel good knowing. I would absolutely love to watch her enjoy herself. I feel im more of a watcher, and join than have play with another female being watched. Maybe its a confidence thing, id probably cum and finish in a few minutes being so horny lol

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

Hi Dan,

Perhaps you should move from your single male profile to a couples profile?

That way you’ll get a lot more contact from guys who might fit your requirements.

What about posting a few pics of her or you two together? If you get jealous or not about the messages you receive, that would be one way of gauging your feelings.

Good luck!

Gbat

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

"Hi Dan,

Perhaps you should move from your single male profile to a couples profile?

That way you’ll get a lot more contact from guys who might fit your requirements.

What about posting a few pics of her or you two together? If you get jealous or not about the messages you receive, that would be one way of gauging your feelings.

Good luck!

Gbat "

This, you deffo need a joint profile with more pics of you both.

Many would be suspicious if you tried to organise a meet with your gf from a single males profile.

Maybe try a club and see how you go there.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get a cheap phone and put a PAYG sim in it. Use that for any contact- if men get arsey you can just block their number or get a new sim. Don't ever give them your actual phone numbers.

Maybe try a club first. You can see how you feel about her getting attention then decide what next, if anything.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Most guys on here are not assholes and any who are well ye can block them. I've never had any guy become pushy after I have met them maybe I'm lucky but it hasn't happened and if it did then they would be blocked and I never bring anyone I don't know well and have met regularly to my home or tell them where I live.

If you are meeting a guy for a threesome remember it's about his enjoyment as well ,singles are not a plaything for couples to use for their enjoyment only.This can quite often be forgotten when some couples look for someone to join them.

As for jealousy well only you and your partner can answer that . Maybe like said above when you messages or how they get on together you may feel jealous if you do then it might be better to stop before it goes to the bedroom and ends up being a big issue. That has happened to many a single person on here both male and female and it is a crap position for them to find themselves in and can be quite dangerous as well.

If you are not completely sure it is something you both want then think long and hard before you do it as it can cause a rift between you both that sometimes doesn't heal.But it can also be the best experience ever and enhance your relationship and strengthen it.

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