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so why do certain guys behave this way..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Guys a question for you …why when a woman knows what she wants ie who with and what she likes … why do you feel its unfair on you why do you feel the need to say things like we are aiming to high or punching above our weight …. Why do you feel that we should give you a chance even thought your not what we are looking for ?? why do you feel your jumping thro hoops when no one is asking you too … why do you go off is a huff and spread nasty stuff via chat rooms because someone has said no thanks ?? why …why do you feel it should be on a plate for you and that no one should say no ??

A lot of whys I know but its getting more and more ibe had a few lovely people this last week point out someone is speading rumors via private messages thanks to those guys/women and couples but I just don’t see why it upsets you so much because im not interested or have said no thanks …. One even said there no such thing as a strong woman or as he put it a womans mind should be made up for her by a man ????

I / we only meet men thankfully 70 to 80% are lovely and totally understand but for those others I simply ask why … it cant help you in anyway as nearly all the women and couples we know on here are strong women who 100% know what they want the men I meet are always polite and confident as that’s what I seek so guys enlighten us as to why some act this way …

Before I finish nearly 28 years on the scene many many other internet sites before fab and join fab in the first month of it opening its definitely getting worse… so why…

help me understand..

and before some ones says it no the bad dont ruin it for the good they only ruin it for themselves.. stop hiding behind that ...

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By *izzibeth9Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough

'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

I guess blokes far outnumber women here, so there are going to be way more asshole guys than women. And a lot of guys think most women here are easy and ready to fuck anyone who asks. There's a sense of entitlement they have here for some reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been on and off the site for years. Frequently chat to newbies and give them the same advice:

Be pleasant, be polite, take rejection on the chin, no means no and appearing desperate is never going to achieve anything.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two "

facial hair is a phobia ive had since a child it really afects me but i am getting better had a meeting with a guy with a goatee who understood and we kinda got past it so you never know this phobia could be on its way out a bitat a time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only thing i would suggest lowering for women is distance, thats it. Im not one to believe in ditching amazing experiences to be had simply cos it requires some effort to arrange a meet and travel. I understand why distance is important for many, easier to get home if things didnt work out etc. But if you know that person is genuine, ticks all your boxes and makes you feel a certain way most barely manage to do, and theyre 110% reliable and wont ghost you, why throw all of that away?

As for the rest? Ego. Pure and simple. Men dont like being made to feel inferior, we all have this desire to be the alpha male whether its strong or buried away somewhere, its simply pure male biology. It hurts when guys get rejected, their pride takes a hit and a lot of them cant handle that especially when theyve been successful in other aspects of life outside of sexual adventures.

Just consider for a moment, as a woman, you have the hots for a guy you really like, youve made an effort to be sexy, you try to get his attention aaaand.. he just doesnt notice you, he hasnt rejected or invited you, he just doesnt notice you. How does that make you feel? Like youre not good enough, you werent sexy or alluring enough to catch his eye, you have nothing to offer that is enough for him to focus his attention on you.

Men have feelings too, some take it on the chin and stay positive, others let it get to them and bring them down, and others feel its an attack on their pride and sense of worth, thus theyll lash out cos they dont know how to manage that rejection.

Some on the other are just somewhat delusional, they feel that what they have is what every woman wants, they dont understand what league theyre in or who they are as an individual is only appealing to certain ppl and their own preferences.

Desperation, always being a winner in other aspects of life, not being in control of their emotions, not understanding who they are or what other ppl want, theres a whole multitude of reasons why men act the way they do. But being bitter or resentful about how men behave, is letting yourself take those attacks personally when youve rejected them. Youve said no, you stick with your preferences, and if they lash out from being rejected, so what? Its not your problem and you move on. Let them behave poorly, theyll eventually give up and leave or get banned as a result of their behaviour. Just as men have to put up with taking knocks from being rejected, woman have to take the knocks when rejecting men

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By *izzibeth9Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough


"'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two

facial hair is a phobia ive had since a child it really afects me but i am getting better had a meeting with a guy with a goatee who understood and we kinda got past it so you never know this phobia could be on its way out a bitat a time "

Ahh bless you, I'm only pulling your leg. I'm hairy as balls all over and that's absolutely not to everyone's taste, but that's just part of life really.

The mind boggles as to why guys - or anyone for that matter - resorts to abuse. Rejection sucks for sure, but in swinging its par for the course really! There's just no need.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Just consider for a moment, as a woman, you have the hots for a guy you really like, youve made an effort to be sexy, you try to get his attention aaaand.. he just doesnt notice you, he hasnt rejected or invited you, he just doesnt notice you. How does that make you feel? Like youre not good enough, you werent sexy or alluring enough to catch his eye, you have nothing to offer that is enough for him to focus his attention on you."

to be totally honest id feel fine you cant alway have what you want in life id feel no rejection from that senario what so ever ?? when you join this life style surely you understand that its all yes and no not maybe i really dont get caught up in that i want you so bad thing thats just not me at all and the same with hubs to many people bring too many feeling into this scene when and where its not needed ...maybe im a little but cold maybe other women we be as you say ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two

facial hair is a phobia ive had since a child it really afects me but i am getting better had a meeting with a guy with a goatee who understood and we kinda got past it so you never know this phobia could be on its way out a bitat a time

Ahh bless you, I'm only pulling your leg. I'm hairy as balls all over and that's absolutely not to everyone's taste, but that's just part of life really.

The mind boggles as to why guys - or anyone for that matter - resorts to abuse. Rejection sucks for sure, but in swinging its par for the course really! There's just no need. "

thing is its only facial hair i find a hairy bod on the right man quite horny at times

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By *izzibeth9Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough


"'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two

facial hair is a phobia ive had since a child it really afects me but i am getting better had a meeting with a guy with a goatee who understood and we kinda got past it so you never know this phobia could be on its way out a bitat a time

Ahh bless you, I'm only pulling your leg. I'm hairy as balls all over and that's absolutely not to everyone's taste, but that's just part of life really.

The mind boggles as to why guys - or anyone for that matter - resorts to abuse. Rejection sucks for sure, but in swinging its par for the course really! There's just no need.

thing is its only facial hair i find a hairy bod on the right man quite horny at times "

Well then, now might be a good time I mention that I only grow out the beard for Christmas, and the facial shrubbery is trimmed right back for the new year

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"to be totally honest id feel fine you cant alway have what you want in life id feel no rejection from that senario what so ever ?? when you join this life style surely you understand that its all yes and no not maybe i really dont get caught up in that i want you so bad thing thats just not me at all and the same with hubs to many people bring too many feeling into this scene when and where its not needed ...maybe im a little but cold maybe other women we be as you say ??"

Well yeah ofc you may not but obviously other woman could take it differently. I saw in a different thread that someone stopped blocking those who werent interested cos one woman said that she got upset for being blocked when she said no. So even then a woman being blocked even though abuse wasnt thrown at her, she took it poorly. So im sure that simply not being noticed or flirting with a guy but not being returned the same interest can be hard for some women. You gals just react and take it differently, mostly anyway.

As long as you can try see it from their point of view, you can understand why men behave the way they do, it might not entirely be their fault, despite their behaviour being unacceptable. It is what it is. Just cant expect all men to behave appropriately just as men cant expect women to lower their standards/preferences

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By *alypsoWoman
over a year ago

Hinckley


"'cos some people's egos are much bigger than their dicks, and they can't process the concept that not everyone wants to jump into the sack with them.

But equally what's up with facial hair huh!? I'm super offended right now

Seriously though, people can be such dicks. Especially online. But desperation isn't a good look regardless of where its on display, and shitty behaviour will be seen as such. Chin up, and happy Fabbing you two "

Ego is spot on, as per any site, can’t take rejection or that people have personal preferences which you might not fit in!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"to be totally honest id feel fine you cant alway have what you want in life id feel no rejection from that senario what so ever ?? when you join this life style surely you understand that its all yes and no not maybe i really dont get caught up in that i want you so bad thing thats just not me at all and the same with hubs to many people bring too many feeling into this scene when and where its not needed ...maybe im a little but cold maybe other women we be as you say ??

Well yeah ofc you may not but obviously other woman could take it differently. I saw in a different thread that someone stopped blocking those who werent interested cos one woman said that she got upset for being blocked when she said no. So even then a woman being blocked even though abuse wasnt thrown at her, she took it poorly. So im sure that simply not being noticed or flirting with a guy but not being returned the same interest can be hard for some women. You gals just react and take it differently, mostly anyway.

As long as you can try see it from their point of view, you can understand why men behave the way they do, it might not entirely be their fault, despite their behaviour being unacceptable. It is what it is. Just cant expect all men to behave appropriately just as men cant expect women to lower their standards/preferences"

just to add most men do behave i just want to understand why its ok for a guy to be so mad that he goes off to other sprouting shit ?? no matter what or who the guy is its not acceptable niether is any of the other stuff

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By *arry monk40Man
over a year ago

Telford

Most blokes are nobs simple look at parliament

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"just to add most men do behave i just want to understand why its ok for a guy to be so mad that he goes off to other sprouting shit ?? no matter what or who the guy is its not acceptable niether is any of the other stuff "

Oh no im not saying its okay for them to behave the way they do when they act out and hurl abuse, im just saying thats part of dealing with men in general. Not all of us are smooth charmers with a thick skin and a handle on our emotions.

Im no professional or official expert, but ive always been fascinated by social interactions and psychology and ive read up on a lot of stuff to do with dating overall, hooking up, one night stands, relationships etc. And what i explained in my first comment os the general jist of it. Women just have to accept that thats whats going to happen when they reject men, same as men have to expect being rejected when they approach women

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire

Yet another whining about guys thread.

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

One even said there no such thing as a strong woman or as he put it a womans mind should be made up for her by a man

Please tell me who said that so I can block them

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yet another whining about guys thread. "

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

A lot of people join but have unrealistic expectations, nor any interest in swinging, any community, anything at all, apart from them getting easy sex.

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Most blokes just want to stick it in have a bit of fun and be back home for the football, most men are not really interesting in getting a connection in a emotional degree, their don't want to know what your in and outs of life are, and you probably don't want to know theirs, as you are only basing your selection on looks alone and feel unattractive if declined.

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?"

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow "

bravo

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow

bravo "

See you there tomorrow then pet!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow

bravo

See you there tomorrow then pet! "

are you one of those men then ?? who dont like strong women who know what they want ? you going to answer tomorrow why wait you have the floor now ?

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I can't understand why some change.just because people are only looking for a certain kind of guy so they try and be that person I prefer to just be myself it would be difficult to try and keep up with everyone else

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By *ouplecu2015Couple
over a year ago

Reading


"I guess blokes far outnumber women here, so there are going to be way more asshole guys than women. And a lot of guys think most women here are easy and ready to fuck anyone who asks. There's a sense of entitlement they have here for some reason. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi, wish I could answer all that for you but I think the simple answer is that some men are assholes and just think that women are just there for their pleasure and should have no needs, desires or a mind of their own. Also I think that some also take rejection hard as is if it's a front to their masculinaty or something rather than simply a women having an opinion about what she likes and enjoys. Not much help I'm afraid, hope your ok and it hasn't caused you to much hassle x

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I'd say sometimes it's out of frustration.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The only thing i would suggest lowering for women is distance, thats it. Im not one to believe in ditching amazing experiences to be had simply cos it requires some effort to arrange a meet and travel. I understand why distance is important for many, easier to get home if things didnt work out etc. But if you know that person is genuine, ticks all your boxes and makes you feel a certain way most barely manage to do, and theyre 110% reliable and wont ghost you, why throw all of that away?

As for the rest? Ego. Pure and simple. Men dont like being made to feel inferior, we all have this desire to be the alpha male whether its strong or buried away somewhere, its simply pure male biology. It hurts when guys get rejected, their pride takes a hit and a lot of them cant handle that especially when theyve been successful in other aspects of life outside of sexual adventures.

Just consider for a moment, as a woman, you have the hots for a guy you really like, youve made an effort to be sexy, you try to get his attention aaaand.. he just doesnt notice you, he hasnt rejected or invited you, he just doesnt notice you. How does that make you feel? Like youre not good enough, you werent sexy or alluring enough to catch his eye, you have nothing to offer that is enough for him to focus his attention on you.

Men have feelings too, some take it on the chin and stay positive, others let it get to them and bring them down, and others feel its an attack on their pride and sense of worth, thus theyll lash out cos they dont know how to manage that rejection.

Some on the other are just somewhat delusional, they feel that what they have is what every woman wants, they dont understand what league theyre in or who they are as an individual is only appealing to certain ppl and their own preferences.

Desperation, always being a winner in other aspects of life, not being in control of their emotions, not understanding who they are or what other ppl want, theres a whole multitude of reasons why men act the way they do. But being bitter or resentful about how men behave, is letting yourself take those attacks personally when youve rejected them. Youve said no, you stick with your preferences, and if they lash out from being rejected, so what? Its not your problem and you move on. Let them behave poorly, theyll eventually give up and leave or get banned as a result of their behaviour. Just as men have to put up with taking knocks from being rejected, woman have to take the knocks when rejecting men"

Well stated. ()

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow

bravo

See you there tomorrow then pet!

are you one of those men then ?? who dont like strong women who know what they want ? you going to answer tomorrow why wait you have the floor now ?"

Strong women don’t whine or moan of course

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yet another whining about guys thread.

oh poor you you didnt have to look ?? or answer but yet you did ?

Someone needs to say it. You can always post another one tomorrow

bravo

See you there tomorrow then pet!

are you one of those men then ?? who dont like strong women who know what they want ? you going to answer tomorrow why wait you have the floor now ?

Strong women don’t whine or moan of course "

ah so talking about something thats on my mind is whining or moaning i see maybe i should do the same with all your pointless post and start cometing on how boring they are too ?? but no i wont because because im not that petty ..if this post was not for you why coment ? dont you ever moan ? or are you perfect ?

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By *inkn12Man
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Guys a question for you …why when a woman knows what she wants ie who with and what she likes … why do you feel its unfair on you why do you feel the need to say things like we are aiming to high or punching above our weight …. Why do you feel that we should give you a chance even thought your not what we are looking for ?? why do you feel your jumping thro hoops when no one is asking you too … why do you go off is a huff and spread nasty stuff via chat rooms because someone has said no thanks ?? why …why do you feel it should be on a plate for you and that no one should say no ??

A lot of whys I know but its getting more and more ibe had a few lovely people this last week point out someone is speading rumors via private messages thanks to those guys/women and couples but I just don’t see why it upsets you so much because im not interested or have said no thanks …. One even said there no such thing as a strong woman or as he put it a womans mind should be made up for her by a man ????

I / we only meet men thankfully 70 to 80% are lovely and totally understand but for those others I simply ask why … it cant help you in anyway as nearly all the women and couples we know on here are strong women who 100% know what they want the men I meet are always polite and confident as that’s what I seek so guys enlighten us as to why some act this way …

Before I finish nearly 28 years on the scene many many other internet sites before fab and join fab in the first month of it opening its definitely getting worse… so why…

help me understand..

and before some ones says it no the bad dont ruin it for the good they only ruin it for themselves.. stop hiding behind that ...

"

I’ve always said we need to be taught about healthy relationships at school… I got male friends that don’t understand the dynamics of a healthy relationship of any sort and it frustrates me so much

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By *ornyandachingCouple
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Insecurity in the individual

Probably related to mummy issues when they were a kid

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