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strangest excuse

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm sure we have all at some time been let down or had our timewasted on here and other sites its not nice when you travel or pay out for hotels etc then find the couple you have arranged to meet are not going to show ....but what is the strangest or funniest excuse you have been given or have you been in a situation where you have actually met the couple and they have given the "got to go toilet excuse" and nipped out the back door ??

the strangest excuse we haev been given is that the Hubby "stubbed his toe" the morning of the meet ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With an hour to go till meet, couple informed us their daughter was ill, we made appropriate noises, sorry etc later that afternoon they were advertising for a swing date, needless to say we were not happy, i sent message saying glad your daughters well etc and drop dead!

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

not us but sum m8s. they met single lad asked him to shower fust as he smelt a bit just cum from work he went in shower says wont be 5 mins left fone in car then fooks off new meaning to wash n go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i had 4 in a row let me down at the last and sent text messages so late that i had already taken the hotel room.

after a while you soon get fed up with it and sadly i developed a hard line towards people who say they want to meet and never get round to it.

soon as i think they are messing me about i give them a week to meet and if they dont they get binned.

so what if im a single guy doesnt mean i have to put up with crap from people.

i got to thank a couple i met who told me what to do with people who keep you hanging on a string.

bin them.they aint worth it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

btw essex you look a fine couple to me so its clearly other peoples problems.

you have nothing to worry about.carry on and sod them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

one cancelled on me cuz his mum died....so i was polite, even met him week after we stayed in touch for a while, i was his shoulder to cry on, .....then it went quiet...

he was on the news , being sentenced to prison, and guess what, his mum was there supporting him lol

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

The hubby explained his wife had been out in the car earlier that day and got caught short (pissed herself whilst driving) so they couldn't drive their car as the seat was still wet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"one cancelled on me cuz his mum died....so i was polite, even met him week after we stayed in touch for a while, i was his shoulder to cry on, .....then it went quiet...

he was on the news , being sentenced to prison, and guess what, his mum was there supporting him lol

"

now thats a good one.what an arsehole.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Keep em coming ..its never nice to be let down but to hear the excuses etc makes light on what can upset a few people at the time ...

has anyone had the cats had kittens excuse yet? thats another one we had

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Ooow, ooowww, ooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww....

.... "sorry I've been watching porn and wanking all afternoon so I don't feel like it now. Can we do it another time?"

The reply ended in "off"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooow, ooowww, ooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww....

.... "sorry I've been watching porn and wanking all afternoon so I don't feel like it now. Can we do it another time?"

The reply ended in "off" "

what the hell was he doing wanking instead of getting ready to meet you? some right crazy fucker that one. you dodged a bullet there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ok here is the one that made me go home like a madman on my motorbike and hit the punch bag for about 2 hours.

i got speaking to this woman for a while and built up a good online friendship.she had spoken to me on the phone and on cam so she knew what i looked like,my height,build etc.

so when she decided she wanted to meet i travelled over 2 hours to get to her place.

when i get there she invited me in.

and as we where chating i got this feeling that im wasting my time here.

then she just decided that i was to short and i had to leave.

this was after she kept me chatting for a hour plus.

yet she read my profile, chatted to me for a while ,viewed my cam and i made it clear about my details so she knew.

so i rode back like a mad nutter as i was so angry and belted the punch bag when i got home.

so we all get them.sod em.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx "

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare "

did you think i was talking about your height ?? and dont know about old mare but ive certainly been well ridden in my time lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A little while back I must admit, myself and another male friend had to do such a disappearing act.

We were supposed to be meeting a couple for some MMMF fun.

We got to the house, phoned and the hubby says that wifey is at home waiting for us that he was around the corner and that he would join us later. They were both supposed to be there.

We where then given instructions that upon entry we would be led to the bedroom and have a great time. We explained to hubby that as he wouldnt be there we would like to at least have a chat with the mrs and build up some kinda rapport. We proceeded to the house. To our amazement, the lady opened the door in her suspenders and bra, pissed as a fart and beckoned us to go upstairs. Well we both knew that wasnt going to happen. We proceeded to the living room nudged each other and said we had to go to the car as we had forgotten our condoms. We disappeared, phoned the gent and explained why we could not proceed with the job at hand.

Another instance, we both drove up to birmingham to meet a couple. They guided us to the hotel. On arrival, we met nobody, they had turned their phone off. We waited for about an hour and then drove all the way back.

The one similarity between these two instances, is at no time did we build up a rapport via video chat. it was all done via pictures and on the phone.

We LEARNT never to arrannge a meet with anyone who cannot have a face 2 face video chat with you first. At least that way, you can see build a rapport, see each others smile and you can tell if they are genueinely interested in you.

Anyway so far (touch wood) i have not had my time wasted as I DONT meet anyone who i cannot have a face 2 face chat with on cam prior to any meet.

It would be nice to know if the OP built up a rapport via video chat with the folks they were supposed to be meeting.

(wonders which is more time intensive, the forums or the chatrooms, lol)

oh yeah and there was another, which i must leave till another day, lol

HEY SOMETIMES YA JUST GOTTA COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, AS WHATEVER IS MEANT TO BE WILL ALWAYS BE.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare

did you think i was talking about your height ?? and dont know about old mare but ive certainly been well ridden in my time lol x "

ah! life in the old pony yet then.

good because im still revving like a v8 motor

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare

did you think i was talking about your height ?? and dont know about old mare but ive certainly been well ridden in my time lol x "

lol this jockey is last past the post ...I need a good ride soon ...lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare

did you think i was talking about your height ?? and dont know about old mare but ive certainly been well ridden in my time lol x

lol this jockey is last past the post ...I need a good ride soon ...lol"

You and me both hun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having looked at your pictures parider you certainly dont look that short xxx

think she was on about being 5ft 3ins.

i cannot help it.god gave me a choice.

motorbikes or be a jockey.

and i hate horses.

but i love riding an old mare

did you think i was talking about your height ?? and dont know about old mare but ive certainly been well ridden in my time lol x

lol this jockey is last past the post ...I need a good ride soon ...lol

You and me both hun "

well is 3 a crowd?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No way 3 is just getting started 6 is a crowd lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No way 3 is just getting started 6 is a crowd lol "

fuck me i better be a jockey then as this is starting to sound like the national with big fences lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

well we dont want any NON-RUNNERS in this meeting ...lol

off to exeter race course then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well we dont want any NON-RUNNERS in this meeting ...lol

off to exeter race course then "

do i look for a fine filly with a number painted on her arse.lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

looks like a fine filly looking for a good jockey to mount and ride her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"looks like a fine filly looking for a good jockey to mount and ride her "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well we dont want any NON-RUNNERS in this meeting ...lol

off to exeter race course then

do i look for a fine filly with a number painted on her arse.lol"

No hun just look for me with my head in your oats sack

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

well it wont take long to empty mine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyway back to the original post

Had a guy bail on me one night saying his brand new car had gone up in smoke shortly after leaving his home so couldnt make it "no problem say little me ill get hubby to come fetch you or fix the car being a mechanic so we dont have to put off the meet"

thats ok AA are just pulling up now and will tow me home!

so did you want hubby to come get you ?? - no answer

profile deleted never heard from him again lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well we dont want any NON-RUNNERS in this meeting ...lol

off to exeter race course then

do i look for a fine filly with a number painted on her arse.lol

No hun just look for me with my head in your oats sack "

now thats more like it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well the other day this bloke turned up, i put kettle on, made a brew, he kissed me ... i suddenly came over queasy .... excused myself went to the loo, and threw up ....came back, felt fine lol ... spent ages trying to convince him it wasn't his fault .... kinda killed the night though and he left ... at least he didn't disappear while i was puking

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By *uton_coupleCouple
over a year ago

luton

tell us what he was going to do with his toe please

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