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Disgusting turn of phrase that makes you laugh

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh

I used to work with a fella that, when things started to go well, he would say “That’s it’s lad, now your legs are open!” It would always make me giggle like a child

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

I was recently introduced to an old thread on this forum asking how many women loved "cock snot up the fart pipe" and I swear I snort laughed.

May I never be so mature that I don't find that funny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Knee deep in clunge

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh


"I was recently introduced to an old thread on this forum asking how many women loved "cock snot up the fart pipe" and I swear I snort laughed.

May I never be so mature that I don't find that funny. "

I’ve heard of both of those phrases but never together. Cock snot is always going to be funny

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh


"Knee deep in clunge

"

Hahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He/she looks like a bulldog licking piss off a thistle lol

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh


"He/she looks like a bulldog licking piss off a thistle lol"

An absolute classic

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral


"Knee deep in clunge

"

I love clunge, and I love norks too. One of my mates bought me a name necklace with norks on it, and it makes me smile every time I wear it!

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh

I always say “that’ll suck the skin off it now” when I’ve put a new bag in the Hoover

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tongue punch me in the fart box

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral


"I always say “that’ll suck the skin off it now” when I’ve put a new bag in the Hoover "

When I plug my phone in to charge and it does that little vibrate thing I always, always say "dirty bitch, you love it". Did it in work one day with my manager stood behind me. Thankfully he just laughed at me rather than reporting me to HR!

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh


"I always say “that’ll suck the skin off it now” when I’ve put a new bag in the Hoover

When I plug my phone in to charge and it does that little vibrate thing I always, always say "dirty bitch, you love it". Did it in work one day with my manager stood behind me. Thankfully he just laughed at me rather than reporting me to HR!"

That is fucking brilliant!!!

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By *ip_brumMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"Knee deep in clunge

I love clunge, and I love norks too. One of my mates bought me a name necklace with norks on it, and it makes me smile every time I wear it!"

There’s a Mock the Week sketch with Hugh Dennis doing a voice over for Prince Phillip where he says “Cor look at the norks on that” always creases me up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Knee deep in clunge

I love clunge, and I love norks too. One of my mates bought me a name necklace with norks on it, and it makes me smile every time I wear it!

There’s a Mock the Week sketch with Hugh Dennis doing a voice over for Prince Phillip where he says “Cor look at the norks on that” always creases me up. "

I’ve seen that, it’s hilarious

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral


"Knee deep in clunge

I love clunge, and I love norks too. One of my mates bought me a name necklace with norks on it, and it makes me smile every time I wear it!

There’s a Mock the Week sketch with Hugh Dennis doing a voice over for Prince Phillip where he says “Cor look at the norks on that” always creases me up. "

I just had a watch and it really made me laugh, thank you!

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By *ip_brumMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"Knee deep in clunge

I love clunge, and I love norks too. One of my mates bought me a name necklace with norks on it, and it makes me smile every time I wear it!

There’s a Mock the Week sketch with Hugh Dennis doing a voice over for Prince Phillip where he says “Cor look at the norks on that” always creases me up.

I just had a watch and it really made me laugh, thank you!"

You’re welcome

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

I remember a fellow Brit (when I was in France), who would always sing Ace of Base's song as "All that she wants, is another dicking , up the dirtbox!"

Class, pure class.

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By *aughty but nice...Man
over a year ago

Staffs

Split arse ...I can't stand to here it when some of the knobs at work use it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can only piss with the cock that you have got.... That's my old favourite and never a truer word spoken in my view

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when going home on leave from germany a friend of mine used to say "this time tomorrow i will be up to my nuts in guts"

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough


"when going home on leave from germany a friend of mine used to say "this time tomorrow i will be up to my nuts in guts""

Sounds more like a kinky butcher.

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh


"when going home on leave from germany a friend of mine used to say "this time tomorrow i will be up to my nuts in guts""

This is absolutely golden stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Porridge cannon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone wrote on here a couple of days ago asking if anyone wanted their ham queef stretched.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/11/21 23:22:44]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone wrote on here a couple of days ago asking if anyone wanted their ham queef stretched.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A Fabber once messaged to say that he’d eat my pussy ‘like a tramp eating chips’. Gross, but it really made me laugh

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By *urtyGent OP   Man
over a year ago

eastleigh

I knew someone that called thongs a twat hammock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She likes a drop of cock

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By *iscreet gent2018Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

While waving your cock at her say “come on, it’ll not suck itself!”

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By *umblefunMan
over a year ago

London/ South East

Can’t remember where this comes from but it made me smile ….

Does she take it up the council?

Meaning; council gritter = shitter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can’t remember where this comes from but it made me smile ….

Does she take it up the council?

Meaning; council gritter = shitter

"

Don't know if Viz can take credit for inventing it but definitely seen it there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't shoot the messenger...working in Agfhan my mate was talking about a rather large lady he knew...he said "you wouldn't let her fart on your last pound of flour" nearly died

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By *ormorantMan
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Does she answer the back door.

Piss flaps like B52 bomber doors

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