FabSwingers.com forum: meet no-shows, to rant or not to rant?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

most of the genuine couples and single fems on this site seem to have a rant on their profile (to a greater or lesser degree) about timewasters and people who no-show for meets.

is it acceptable for a single guy to have the same, or will it meerly serve to put off the few people who do seem to be interested in meeting single guys? does it make any differance, or it is jsut a statement of intent that you really are real (as if being verified as real isnt?)

the last 3 meets i've arranged have all been with people who are supposedly verified as genuine, and they have all cancelled on me (usually with fuck all notice when i'm doing the bloody travelling)

is this all jsut part of the game or is there anything else that can be done?

any thoughts oppintions, or your own rants all welcome...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't been around that long , but think you have to put it down to experience mate . Try to speak on the phone first , to all parties , but I guess things happen sometimes . Think of the good times to be had , keep smiling , there are plenty people on here who do meet .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens to everybody... couples included. We've been cancelled on the night before and even had a no show after talking for 9 months lol...

Don't take it to heart... when you meet the real thing and you get known then you'll think different..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep-it happens-we can honestly say that we,ve never cancelled a meet after setting a date,just think its an appalling thing to do.Though if something serious had happened, you'd have to hope the people you cancelled on, understood.Take time to find out about the people you intend to meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I agree with the taking time to know people

Theres no rush and its normally always worth the wait in the end

Im not saying you're pushing people into meeting too quickly but some may see it as that and feel they have been backed into a corner and unfortunatley not everyone has the knack of being able to be open and honest if they feel this way and end up messing others around xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess we must have led a charmed life as have, touch wood, not been let down in this manner yet.

Would suggest that anything too confrontational in your profile may backfire. It's currently very well written and the last thing you want with the amount of guys you are competing against is something in it that simply makes folk pass it by.

Best of luck.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rants in any profile put us off, as does SHOUTING.

We all know there are timewasters, pic collectors, dreamers and so on, none of us are interested in them, we don't need to be told that in a profile and we certainly don't need to be considered as such before being given a chance to prove ourselves, Shouting at us immediately puts us off meeting people, we have even seen profile with threats of violence therein, certainly not what we are looking for when deciding wether to meet or not.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately it's a fact that free sites like this attract a large proportion of people just testing the water or playing a game.

You just have to chalk it up to experience.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rants in any profile put us off, as does SHOUTING.

Our thoughts exactly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Personally I think putting comments about timewasters in your profile is just as likely to attract timewasters as to deter them… you’ll basically be highlighting that you have been taken in by people a few times already and you’re likely an easy target.

As has been said already, it can happen to any of us. Sometimes it can be genuine reasons, sometimes they are not.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i don't even know why people rant about no shows, to me its all part of swinging, we know theres time wasters out there, we're never going to get rid of them its just the chance you take, if you get a no show simple move on to the next meet, moaning about them not slove anything at all

I never get why people put on their profiles, no time wasters! like as if a time waters going to read that and move on lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *WfellaMan
over a year ago

liverpool

i wouldn't bother putting anything at all on your profile, the genuine people know all to well that the not so genuine people are out there and they always will be, its just something you have to put up with, it can be hard if you have experienced quite a few timewasters in quick succession, and its easy to start thinking everyone is a timewaster, but they arent, you just have to sieve thru the shit to find the goodins, i have had many many cples "go missing" on the day of an arranged meet, not online, no reply to emails, phone switched off etc etc, but i always insist on a quick phone call just before i leave the house, to make sure nothin unexpected has happened there end, and as such, so far i have only ever had one no-show,and when i realised it was a no show i actually thought it was funny and drove home with a smile on my face, after hearing all the stories about it happening to other poeple it had finally happened to me, i felt part of the "club"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *cottishTweetieCouple
over a year ago

Blackwood, South Lanarkshire

We have been let down a few times but dont let it bother us now.

We even went to collect a guy from the train station so he didnt need to get a taxi.

He didn't show, no text no call no nothing.

Recently thought on giving him another chance. Sent him a message on MSN to see if he fancied a meet at the weekend as he kept asking if he was in good books again. He didn't reply... Now we wont either.. There are loads of nice single guys out there, so we have no issues on moving on.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"We have been let down a few times but dont let it bother us now.

We even went to collect a guy from the train station so he didnt need to get a taxi.

He didn't show, no text no call no nothing.

Wow you're very forgiving are'nt you? lol

There would be no way on earth I would even consider contacting anyone if I had taken the trouble of going to the station to save them a taxi fare only to be stood up with no reason

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really don't see the point in ranting - full stop.

At the end of the day we can rant, rave, pull our hair out or do whatever in protest at things we dont like and will it make a ha'peth of difference ?

No !

So don't rant - bite the bullet and move on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unfortunately it's a fact that free sites like this attract a large proportion of people just testing the water or playing a game.

You just have to chalk it up to experience."

Not just free sites - ALL sites ...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Little tip if its a new meet we usually call them just before we leave.I know its not nice but dont take it personally just move on.xxxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Unfortunately it's a fact that free sites like this attract a large proportion of people just testing the water or playing a game.

You just have to chalk it up to experience.

Not just free sites - ALL sites ..."

Yes I agree its no different on any of the pay sites either...same moans...same whinges and you have to pay for it! pmsl

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

simple advice for a single guy. speak to both couples before you drive 5 miles out. Any suggestions things are not as they seem, go straight back home. Make sure the wife or female partner is absolutely ok with meeting- preferable if she is the one setting it up..If its a first meet always keep voice contact by phone (not text) a few days before. If the contacts are fewer before the meet, it ain't gonna happen- start making other plans quickly- they will stand you up at the last minute.. just my though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i reckon its a lot harder for couples to know who will be a no show- in my experience as a coulple. let the wife or gf make the first snf fem to fem talk s out the reluctant ladies who feel dragged into it.. condiser the other couple have double booked and may have to cancel buy play some night-we have 3 nights a week to indulge your fantassies so make them count each week end

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eavensg84uCouple
over a year ago

Harrow

We solved the occasional no-show problem - these days, we only ever meet other couples at a swingers club. That way, if they dont show (or do, but are not what was on the tin, so to speak) then we havent wasted a night. Drastic I know but better than sitting round the house dressed like a tart waiting for someone to show up who suddenly seems to have disappeared.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread