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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Why this is not a dating site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why this is not a dating site "

It’s a site where you build a relationship though, no matter how temporary.

Surely it’s up to the individual what they require from a potential liaison? If it’s not for you, pass them by

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP,

Some want a little more security now I'm afraid.

I go to clubs, cos feeling safe and fun is under one roof.

Eliminates the time delay

So understand where you are coming from....

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Have a chat 10 mins before sex or after but endless messaging making banal small talk no body language with messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people prefer to have sex with anyone who is physically attractive and sexually compatible. Others prefer to have sex only with someone with whom they can personally connect well. To each, their own.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Some people prefer to have sex with anyone who is physically attractive and sexually compatible. Others prefer to have sex only with someone with whom they can personally connect well. To each, their own."
how can you emotionally connect with someone through messages no body language I like a little chat but not days and weeks of it if you fancy each other then fuck each other

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish "

Well OP, a few full-stops wouldn’t go amiss, but don’t you think if someone has said the wrong thing in a message and it’s put the other person off, it’s severed it’s purpose? The attraction and compatibility clearly wasn’t there. Better to find out in messages than in person.

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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria

I personally like to know I’m not getting down and dirty with a dick...so to speak (Mrs Yeah Baby speaking) we are both big on personality not just attraction by appearance.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn

Some use it to fuck here and now. Others like a connection and a longer friendship. And yes some use it to date.

What works for you OP, won't work everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish "

Totally get this!

Haha so true!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally like to know the person first. We might all be here for the same thing but it doesn't mean I'm going to jump into bed with anyone

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

You are wrong if you message in the first place then I like to assume you fancy each other in the first place I don’t need to know your life story or your interests and vice versa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good you then lol

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire

I need to “like” the person I’m about to have sex with … For anything else … I have a wand

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"I personally like to know the person first. We might all be here for the same thing but it doesn't mean I'm going to jump into bed with anyone "
why is that so important it is not a dating site I like a bit of a chat a flirt Just before sex or afterwards but not endless messaging

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"Why this is not a dating site "

If you're not confident in your own personality to be able to find out a little about each other first, that's a you problem.

If you want an anonymous shag with absolutely no connection or even bothering to find our If you have any common ground, you might consider paying for it.

Women in general need to assess any prospective meet to try & ensure they're meeting someone compatible & not a weirdo or a danger.

If you don't understand that, you really don't understand women at all.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"I need to “like” the person I’m about to have sex with … For anything else … I have a wand

"
the magic wand is great

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

I am not a weirdo or a danger to anyone nor a time waste check my veris I am actually a well mannered nice guy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can imagine most women want to do a bit of digging before committing to a meet? For security and reassurance etc. Men are able to take a bit more of a risk, so less messages are required for them.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

I can understand that concern if a man has been on 6 months or more with no veris

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I personally like to know I’m not getting down and dirty with a dick...so to speak (Mrs Yeah Baby speaking) we are both big on personality not just attraction by appearance."

Yes definitely agree... nice to know the person isn’t a prick.. pun intended

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I personally like to know the person first. We might all be here for the same thing but it doesn't mean I'm going to jump into bed with anyone why is that so important it is not a dating site I like a bit of a chat a flirt Just before sex or afterwards but not endless messaging "

It may not be important for you. It may be important for others. How hard is it to understand that not everyone is fine with just sex and random banter?

When it comes to conversations, I connect with some people while I don't connect with others. The pre/after sex part have been downright awkward with someone I don't connect well. If you are capable of pulling of conversations with everyone, I am happy for you. But you need to understand that not everyone is same. If someone wants more small talk, it's their wish. If you don't want that, you have the right to just not talk with them.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Hard to tell someone’s true personality with endless messaging they not all could tell you anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because I like to know the person. I also meet for a social beforehand as well

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By *avidagainMan
over a year ago

st.leonards on sea

a relationship is key for me as has been said before connect with someone a relationship is started it is exciting and sexually charged as you get to know each other usually it comes to nothing but if it works out it is a lovely thing thank you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/10/21 13:30:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m the same. I like to know the person fairly well through messages first. For me it is important you like and appeal to the persons you enjoy sexually with.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m extremely fussy about who has access to my vagina, and I reserve the right to do so.

I will always chat and make connections first, and that’s ok.

Not everyone is the same, and that’s ok too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site "

People are allowed to experience Fab as they wish, not as others expect them to

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

How long do you message for before you meet weeks months

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am looking for a fuck buddy not a relationship but I'm also a person who kinda likes to fuck someone who has a personality or can hold a conversation. Like I said I like to know the person so for me talking and getting to know that person is key. Do what works for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site "

All you can do is ask them as soon as they message....

If they're being honest, upfront and wanting different to you. Then that's your time not wasted and you can ask other people.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

I don’t expect anyone to do anything I am just a point forward and having a mature adult conversation about it don’t put words in my mouth

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By *heonix_flamesWoman
over a year ago

Midlands


"I personally like to know the person first. We might all be here for the same thing but it doesn't mean I'm going to jump into bed with anyone why is that so important it is not a dating site I like a bit of a chat a flirt Just before sex or afterwards but not endless messaging "

I don’t understand why so many men (that’s mainly who I interact with on here) are so hung up on this thing about dating. You don’t have to be in a relationship with someone to treat them with respect and make them feel comfortable- just treat people decently and like they’re human beings rather than things to use.

You seem to be very unhappy with most aspects of fab, maybe it’s not for you if you’re not able to just pass over the bits/people you’re not interested in.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"I am looking for a fuck buddy not a relationship but I'm also a person who kinda likes to fuck someone who has a personality or can hold a conversation. Like I said I like to know the person so for me talking and getting to know that person is key. Do what works for you "
I agree with you but to get know them on a meet instead of endless small talk messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't message people for months on end lol but I do like to get to know know over a period of time before jumping in to meet. We are all different, and that's ok. Makes the world an interesting place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can understand that concern if a man has been on 6 months or more with no veris "

The problem with veris is that those veris are from different people with different standards and requirements to the person that is talking at the time.

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By *he_Last_TitanMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Why wouldn't I want to know more about the person/s I'm about to share the most intimate aspects of my being with?

Also, it helps for a connection - personally, I need a mental connection with the person, otherwise, I quickly lose interest.

M

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t expect anyone to do anything I am just a point forward and having a mature adult conversation about it don’t put words in my mouth "

My point is put forward too - why are you biting back?

Interesting concept when my trail of thought is more open minded to yours.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer to meet within 2 weeks of first message. No point chatting for ages.

It's rare they get to 2 weeks though.

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By *otsonewMan
over a year ago

All over North and Scotland

Interesting view OP. I guess if you see this place as a place to get a quick shag with a stranger then I see where you are coming from. However, this is a swingers site rather than a fuck now site. From my point of view swinging is also about the social side of it, making connections, exploring with people you have got to know and trust, etc. There's certainly a time and place for quickies but that's how I would see the main purpose of a swingers site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP ....reply + quote, on the message you want to reply too...

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why this is not a dating site "

Some people are looking for dates. It's ok, they can do that. Swinging is for friendships too, not just fuck n go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I personally like to know the person first. We might all be here for the same thing but it doesn't mean I'm going to jump into bed with anyone why is that so important it is not a dating site I like a bit of a chat a flirt Just before sex or afterwards but not endless messaging

I don’t understand why so many men (that’s mainly who I interact with on here) are so hung up on this thing about dating. You don’t have to be in a relationship with someone to treat them with respect and make them feel comfortable- just treat people decently and like they’re human beings rather than things to use.

You seem to be very unhappy with most aspects of fab, maybe it’s not for you if you’re not able to just pass over the bits/people you’re not interested in."

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can’t really understand what the original point is, surely it’s all down to the individual. My partner needs to create some kind of emotional/intellectual connection with a guy before being able to contemplate being able to fuck them, don’t really thinks it’s anyone’s place to say that’s not acceptable here. She needs that chat to decide if she wants to go further, clearly the original poster doesn’t need that, predominantly needs a physical attraction and then wants to get on with it. Which is equally valid and I’m sure there are enough women here who are happy to proceed on a similar basis. Different people are aroused/attracted by different things. Each to their own surely rather than complaining not everyone goes about it the same way as you. Just steer clear of those who need that chat in future surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why this is not a dating site "

I’m happy for you that you see this site as a ‘any hole is a goal’ site OP

Not everyone shares the same view. Horse for courses as they say

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"I don’t expect anyone to do anything I am just a point forward and having a mature adult conversation about it don’t put words in my mouth "

But you are … you’re being a little dictator, insisting that people who wish to establish a rapport and engage prior to considering having sex do not belong on Fab and should join a dating site.

How about you keep doing what works for you and not worry about how other people prefer to select their potential playmates ?

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Sorry ferocious fem you are right x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Interesting view OP. I guess if you see this place as a place to get a quick shag with a stranger then I see where you are coming from. However, this is a swingers site rather than a fuck now site. From my point of view swinging is also about the social side of it, making connections, exploring with people you have got to know and trust, etc. There's certainly a time and place for quickies but that's how I would see the main purpose of a swingers site"

Well said

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Oh my god comparing me to a dictator have you read any history books I am not insisting on anything I am putting a view forward for open discussion some most people have been mature and adult about it then there are some who have to get personal by calling them a dictator

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

In what message I have said this is a goal a hole site your words not mine bearded

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Can’t really understand what the original point is, surely it’s all down to the individual. My partner needs to create some kind of emotional/intellectual connection with a guy before being able to contemplate being able to fuck them, don’t really thinks it’s anyone’s place to say that’s not acceptable here. She needs that chat to decide if she wants to go further, clearly the original poster doesn’t need that, predominantly needs a physical attraction and then wants to get on with it. Which is equally valid and I’m sure there are enough women here who are happy to proceed on a similar basis. Different people are aroused/attracted by different things. Each to their own surely rather than complaining not everyone goes about it the same way as you. Just steer clear of those who need that chat in future surely? "
well said

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By *uriousFun6069Couple
over a year ago

Caister-on-sea,great Yarmouth

Mrs speaking here..We are all different, but can the communication beforehand not be classed foreplay? Can it not build suspense and excitement? Messages can be useful. The mind is a powerful thing and most of us don't use it enough! Dirty talk can really add to create mind-blowing sex!! Imaginations can run wild and be very exciting for some. Not everyone just wants short lived instant gratification.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can’t really understand what the original point is, surely it’s all down to the individual. My partner needs to create some kind of emotional/intellectual connection with a guy before being able to contemplate being able to fuck them, don’t really thinks it’s anyone’s place to say that’s not acceptable here. She needs that chat to decide if she wants to go further, clearly the original poster doesn’t need that, predominantly needs a physical attraction and then wants to get on with it. Which is equally valid and I’m sure there are enough women here who are happy to proceed on a similar basis. Different people are aroused/attracted by different things. Each to their own surely rather than complaining not everyone goes about it the same way as you. Just steer clear of those who need that chat in future surely? well said "

So you agree there was no real point to your original post and everyone’s views/approaches to fab are valid?

Excellent, glad we put that to bed then, happing fabbing

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Mrs speaking here..We are all different, but can the communication beforehand not be classed foreplay? Can it not build suspense and excitement? Messages can be useful. The mind is a powerful thing and most of us don't use it enough! Dirty talk can really add to create mind-blowing sex!! Imaginations can run wild and be very exciting for some. Not everyone just wants short lived instant gratification. "
I enjoy messaging and dirty talk for a few hours but not for days and days fuck each other before then have a great time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In what message I have said this is a goal a hole site your words not mine bearded "

Just the impression that you o are only prepared to message for 10 mins before hand and the comment that anyone wanting a relationship of any type shouldn’t be on here and should be in a dating site instead.

It’s invites you don’t care about being a connection or relationship so I can’t see why you would care who you were meeting.

I maybe wrong of course

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

I would like to thank everyone who has contributed to this post and given valuable insight but it has reached the end of its journey to many messages happy fabbing one and all

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

OP it’s fine that you think that way and I respect the fact that you have a stance and stick with it.

It’s important to understand that not everyone looks at things exactly the same way and that’s ok. Some require a bond, some women want to test for red flags. All of it is ok as long as people are clear and where incompatibility is identified that is respected

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"Oh my god comparing me to a dictator have you read any history books I am not insisting on anything I am putting a view forward for open discussion some most people have been mature and adult about it then there are some who have to get personal by calling them a dictator "

Dictator : a person that tells others what to do

The point that you’re putting forward is that people who wish to find out about each other prior to agreeing to meet are wrong and that a 10 minutes chat before or after sex is sufficient.

How did you come to the conclusion that you could “dictate” how other people chose to share their bodies ?

By your verifications you seem to have no issues meeting like minded people, why concern yourself with others that do not share your ways ?

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Some people prefer to have sex with anyone who is physically attractive and sexually compatible. Others prefer to have sex only with someone with whom they can personally connect well. To each, their own."

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

The simple answer is we all use the site how we see fit. If that is not to your liking then you are welcome to go elsewhere. Some people like fuck and go meets, others like socials first and some people want to exchange a number of messages in order to get to know somebody before they jump into be with them. It like so many things on here is a personal preference.

We have probably missed out on a lot of good sex by insisting on a social first but who knows and quite frankly we don't care it is our choice and our preference as to how we run our profile.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"OP it’s fine that you think that way and I respect the fact that you have a stance and stick with it.

It’s important to understand that not everyone looks at things exactly the same way and that’s ok. Some require a bond, some women want to test for red flags. All of it is ok as long as people are clear and where incompatibility is identified that is respected "
well said a very mature response from you Thankyou

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"The simple answer is we all use the site how we see fit. If that is not to your liking then you are welcome to go elsewhere. Some people like fuck and go meets, others like socials first and some people want to exchange a number of messages in order to get to know somebody before they jump into be with them. It like so many things on here is a personal preference.

We have probably missed out on a lot of good sex by insisting on a social first but who knows and quite frankly we don't care it is our choice and our preference as to how we run our profile."

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"The simple answer is we all use the site how we see fit. If that is not to your liking then you are welcome to go elsewhere. Some people like fuck and go meets, others like socials first and some people want to exchange a number of messages in order to get to know somebody before they jump into be with them. It like so many things on here is a personal preference.

We have probably missed out on a lot of good sex by insisting on a social first but who knows and quite frankly we don't care it is our choice and our preference as to how we run our profile."
it is to my liking I love the site at what point in any message did I differ from that

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Miss adventure your definition of a dictator imlpys that every ceo of a big company is a dictator every buisness owner is a dictator your boss or anybody else’s is a dictator these people all have to tell people what to do of course they are not do you see the flaw in your point x

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By *xxLandNxxxCouple
over a year ago

Nuneaton

To be fair we actually tried this . We had planned a night out in Birmingham where at the end of the night we wanted a single male to join us for a quick drink and then go straight to the room .

We didn’t want endless messaging as we felt it wasn’t important to have a personal connection it was the physical act we wanted.

Anyway we gave up in the end as it wasn’t going to work as most the guys wanted to become best friends and know all about us.

So no we prefer a club if we plan meeting with a single guy .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If that works for you OP then great, but just because you prefer to do things one way, does not make others choosing another way wrong.

Personally, I need to like someone before I shag them. I can find someone very physically attractive, but instantly be turned off by their personality.

I like a connection and chemistry l, playful and intense, passionate sex. That doesn’t happen if I don’t feel comfortable with them, and to feel comfortable I need to get to know them a little better.

When I’ve had ONS in the past with people I don’t really know, it’s been ‘ok’ sex. I’m not on here for ‘ok’ sex. I’m here for something spectacular

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t expect anyone to do anything I am just a point forward and having a mature adult conversation about it don’t put words in my mouth

But you are … you’re being a little dictator, insisting that people who wish to establish a rapport and engage prior to considering having sex do not belong on Fab and should join a dating site.

How about you keep doing what works for you and not worry about how other people prefer to select their potential playmates ?

"

Well said

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"Miss adventure your definition of a dictator imlpys that every ceo of a big company is a dictator every buisness owner is a dictator your boss or anybody else’s is a dictator these people all have to tell people what to do of course they are not do you see the flaw in your point x"

No I’m afraid I don’t … you’re not my boss.

And even my boss occasionally struggle to make me comply

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

It must be baffling and soul destroying to see people using the site the way they want to rather than how others think they should?

Maybe all the humble and less handsome people do it one way and all the good-looking people do it differently?

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

My personality is one of my best features, and I like knowing people I'm attracted to personalities as much as physical attributes.

It doesn't matter if I'm physically attracted to someone, if their personality stinks, I don't want to go near them.

Not everyone wants just fuck and go, but that also doesn't mean they are looking for a relationship. There is a massive space between those two extremes.

That's the great thing about this site, you have choice to use it as you like.

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"My personality is one of my best features, and I like knowing people I'm attracted to personalities as much as physical attributes.

It doesn't matter if I'm physically attracted to someone, if their personality stinks, I don't want to go near them.

Not everyone wants just fuck and go, but that also doesn't mean they are looking for a relationship. There is a massive space between those two extremes.

That's the great thing about this site, you have choice to use it as you like. "

100% agree

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Fair point I don’t care if I don’t like someone when I meet them if I fancy them I wil fuck them and we will still have great sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have a chat 10 mins before sex or after but endless messaging making banal small talk no body language with messages "

I like to chat and get to knkw someone, the sex is always so much better than a quick fumble with a random...

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"It must be baffling and soul destroying to see people using the site the way they want to rather than how others think they should?

Maybe all the humble and less handsome people do it one way and all the good-looking people do it differently? "
you are a very Handsome man women are sexually attracted to you because of your looks

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Have a chat 10 mins before sex or after but endless messaging making banal small talk no body language with messages

I like to chat and get to knkw someone, the sex is always so much better than a quick fumble with a random... "
but not for days and days surely x

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick


"Fair point I don’t care if I don’t like someone when I meet them if I fancy them I wil fuck them and we will still have great sex "

Good, I'm glad that approach works for you.

To me, in general, I'd want to be able to be friends with the people I have sex with even if the sex stops.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"To be fair we actually tried this . We had planned a night out in Birmingham where at the end of the night we wanted a single male to join us for a quick drink and then go straight to the room .

We didn’t want endless messaging as we felt it wasn’t important to have a personal connection it was the physical act we wanted.

Anyway we gave up in the end as it wasn’t going to work as most the guys wanted to become best friends and know all about us.

So no we prefer a club if we plan meeting with a single guy . "

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"To be fair we actually tried this . We had planned a night out in Birmingham where at the end of the night we wanted a single male to join us for a quick drink and then go straight to the room .

We didn’t want endless messaging as we felt it wasn’t important to have a personal connection it was the physical act we wanted.

Anyway we gave up in the end as it wasn’t going to work as most the guys wanted to become best friends and know all about us.

So no we prefer a club if we plan meeting with a single guy . "
exactly you don’t need each other’s life stories before fucking

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"It must be baffling and soul destroying to see people using the site the way they want to rather than how others think they should?

Maybe all the humble and less handsome people do it one way and all the good-looking people do it differently? you are a very Handsome man women are sexually attracted to you because of your looks "

No they're not. They are attracted to the fact that I don't focus on my looks or on what others are doing and the fact I treat them as equals and don't put them on a pedestal.

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By *lirty-CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Bexley


"My personality is one of my best features, and I like knowing people I'm attracted to personalities as much as physical attributes.

It doesn't matter if I'm physically attracted to someone, if their personality stinks, I don't want to go near them.

Not everyone wants just fuck and go, but that also doesn't mean they are looking for a relationship. There is a massive space between those two extremes.

That's the great thing about this site, you have choice to use it as you like. "

Exactly this. Personality is key for us too and we have no need or desire to have sex with anyone we wouldn't feel comfortable with socially. We take time to get to know people before meeting and it's always worked for us. We chatted and cammed with one of the first guys we ever had fun with for several months before meeting. We then had a couple of social only meetings before our first of many fun experiences with him over a 2-3 year period.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"My personality is one of my best features, and I like knowing people I'm attracted to personalities as much as physical attributes.

It doesn't matter if I'm physically attracted to someone, if their personality stinks, I don't want to go near them.

Not everyone wants just fuck and go, but that also doesn't mean they are looking for a relationship. There is a massive space between those two extremes.

That's the great thing about this site, you have choice to use it as you like.

Exactly this. Personality is key for us too and we have no need or desire to have sex with anyone we wouldn't feel comfortable with socially. We take time to get to know people before meeting and it's always worked for us. We chatted and cammed with one of the first guys we ever had fun with for several months before meeting. We then had a couple of social only meetings before our first of many fun experiences with him over a 2-3 year period. "
for me that kind of commitment to the cause would be very difficult as I don’t drive and cost a fortune in drinks and taxis

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"It must be baffling and soul destroying to see people using the site the way they want to rather than how others think they should?

Maybe all the humble and less handsome people do it one way and all the good-looking people do it differently? you are a very Handsome man women are sexually attracted to you because of your looks

No they're not. They are attracted to the fact that I don't focus on my looks or on what others are doing and the fact I treat them as equals and don't put them on a pedestal. "
did you not mention less good looking or handsome in your first message

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By *ornyhappyCouple
over a year ago

perth

The green arrow is very useful to add context sometimes.

OP, use the site in the way that best suits you and let others do the same. Just because they choose a different approach doesn't make them wrong.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Also you not need to mention your good looks it speaks for itself and do you honestly believe that most want to be with you on this site I add because of your personality at first stop the false modest and admit you are handsome

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"The green arrow is very useful to add context sometimes.

OP, use the site in the way that best suits you and let others do the same. Just because they choose a different approach doesn't make them wrong. "
never once have I said it did completely

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

My

Last message the English was awful so sorry .

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"My

Last message the English was awful so sorry ."

Ok

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

But you do get to know a person

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

And the message before that my exscuse is that I am messaging and doing a long walk

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"And the message before that my exscuse is that I am messaging and doing a long walk "

Who you talking to

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"But you do get to know a person "
of course have a 15 miniute chat before or after sex if you both wish but not weeks of boring small talk x

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"It must be baffling and soul destroying to see people using the site the way they want to rather than how others think they should?

Maybe all the humble and less handsome people do it one way and all the good-looking people do it differently? you are a very Handsome man women are sexually attracted to you because of your looks

No they're not. They are attracted to the fact that I don't focus on my looks or on what others are doing and the fact I treat them as equals and don't put them on a pedestal. did you not mention less good looking or handsome in your first message "

I was referring to your other threads and your comments on there.

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Maybe message each other for a hour at most agree to meet then arrange details

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"Also you not need to mention your good looks it speaks for itself and do you honestly believe that most want to be with you on this site I add because of your personality at first stop the false modest and admit you are handsome "

If that's aimed at me there is no false modesty at all. You can make whatever assumptions you wish but you are the only one talking about how humble you are

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

Get over it and let others do what they want to do op.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Miss adventure your definition of a dictator imlpys that every ceo of a big company is a dictator every buisness owner is a dictator your boss or anybody else’s is a dictator these people all have to tell people what to do of course they are not do you see the flaw in your point x

No I’m afraid I don’t … you’re not my boss.

And even my boss occasionally struggle to make me comply "

Hahaha brilliant

Can relate

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Get over it and let others do what they want to do op.

"
I do I have no power over anyone free will

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham

Ferocious fem even if you don’t like me I like you a lot xxx

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By *yronMan
over a year ago

grangemouth


"Mrs speaking here..We are all different, but can the communication beforehand not be classed foreplay? Can it not build suspense and excitement? Messages can be useful. The mind is a powerful thing and most of us don't use it enough! Dirty talk can really add to create mind-blowing sex!! Imaginations can run wild and be very exciting for some. Not everyone just wants short lived instant gratification. I enjoy messaging and dirty talk for a few hours but not for days and days fuck each other before then have a great time "

And has this approach worked out well for you?

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish "

Personally I don't think I could have a "great sex meet" with someone I had absolutely no connection with. You can't build a connection in a 10 minute chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish

Personally I don't think I could have a "great sex meet" with someone I had absolutely no connection with. You can't build a connection in a 10 minute chat.

"

Exactly right. The connection is what makes the sex great.

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By *yronMan
over a year ago

grangemouth


"Mrs speaking here..We are all different, but can the communication beforehand not be classed foreplay? Can it not build suspense and excitement? Messages can be useful. The mind is a powerful thing and most of us don't use it enough! Dirty talk can really add to create mind-blowing sex!! Imaginations can run wild and be very exciting for some. Not everyone just wants short lived instant gratification. I enjoy messaging and dirty talk for a few hours but not for days and days fuck each other before then have a great time

And has this approach worked out well for you?"

Apologies, that was meant for the OP.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

It's a swinging site, so for some the connections to others are important.

I couldn't chat for a few messages and meet someone, I like to get to know them and have a social. I'm not looking to date, as I'm in a relationship already.

Let people use fab how they choose and only chat/meet those with the same mindset as you.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"How many possible great sex meets have been ruined because of to many messages someone inadvertently saying the wrong thing being over sensitive one person getting bored fuck each other other then have a good chat afterwards if you wish "

This hits nail on head,

I chat for a while and often people will say things that put me off and that will stop me meeting them.

I disagree that you can't get to know someone chatting, people often reveal their true selves and sometimes that means theyre people I wouldn't want to meet in real life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am with you op I don't get why people need to know my life story before having sex. I haven't got the time or patience for hundreds of message.

It's just sex

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By *iobhan123Woman
over a year ago

Deal


"It's a swinging site, so for some the connections to others are important.

I couldn't chat for a few messages and meet someone, I like to get to know them and have a social. I'm not looking to date, as I'm in a relationship already.

Let people use fab how they choose and only chat/meet those with the same mindset as you. "

Same for me, need to know chemistry and connection are there, wouldn't meet without either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site "

Why does it upset you so much? You don't have to conform... It's always the "nice" guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have a chat 10 mins before sex or after but endless messaging making banal small talk no body language with messages

I like to chat and get to knkw someone, the sex is always so much better than a quick fumble with a random... but not for days and days surely x"

Yeah sometimes

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I don't want hundreds of messages but do want to know if we're likely to get along and a social. For example, I know based solely on the posts on here, that you OP, are someone I wouldn’t arrange to meet... if I met men. Your way of using Fab is not mine, and that's perfectly fine.

The only time I have sex with people I haven't chatted to, is when I go to clubs with my husband.

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By *lassy_but_sassyWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site "

See I think way too many single guys think fab is literally a fuck random women and go site, and it's not! I've even seen some guys say 'not interested in swapping pics with you I just want someone who will meet now' so they're basically saying that they don't care what the woman looks like and will shag anyone. That is really really unattractive to most women.

Yes people do use fab for just getting a shag. But many others are couples looking for someone to join them, or perhaps are single women like me and are looking for a fwb situation with someone they see regularly, in my case I want someone I can build trust and a connection with and therefore I like to get to know people first.

Many other people have also dated and even met their husband/wife through here! I've actually seen many men say they'd be open to dating too. So just because YOU use it as a sex only site does mean others do.

Everyone uses fab how they want to, and everyone is enter to use it how they'd like.

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By *lassy_but_sassyWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site

Why does it upset you so much? You don't have to conform... It's always the "nice" guys "

Totally agree with you!

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By *rs mischiefWoman
over a year ago

Manchester


"Fair point I don’t care if I don’t like someone when I meet them if I fancy them I wil fuck them and we will still have great sex

Good, I'm glad that approach works for you.

To me, in general, I'd want to be able to be friends with the people I have sex with even if the sex stops. "

Oh Cockasaurous, your on my hotlist for that comment!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am not a weirdo or a danger to anyone nor a time waste check my veris I am actually a well mannered nice guy "

But perhaps not a great conversationalist

We all have our flaws

Chin up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ferocious fem even if you don’t like me I like you a lot xxx"

Pmsl

Well I've got one fan.....

If you're bold, you don't make em easy on here lol

Just to say one thing to balance what I've already said.....

I spoke to a guy on here years ago for 6 weeks before I met him. The first initial sex meet wasn't the best...infact probably up there as one of the worst. Three years on and we had the best times with each other, experimental etc...

What I'm trying to say OP. Sometimes you could miss out on those experiences, if you lack communication from the start.....

What have you got to lose?

Wishing you well .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You don’t want a relationship you want a fuck buddy be honest if I am wrong then go on a dating site

See I think way too many single guys think fab is literally a fuck random women and go site, and it's not! I've even seen some guys say 'not interested in swapping pics with you I just want someone who will meet now' so they're basically saying that they don't care what the woman looks like and will shag anyone. That is really really unattractive to most women.

Yes people do use fab for just getting a shag. But many others are couples looking for someone to join them, or perhaps are single women like me and are looking for a fwb situation with someone they see regularly, in my case I want someone I can build trust and a connection with and therefore I like to get to know people first.

Many other people have also dated and even met their husband/wife through here! I've actually seen many men say they'd be open to dating too. So just because YOU use it as a sex only site does mean others do.

Everyone uses fab how they want to, and everyone is enter to use it how they'd like. "

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Ferocious fem even if you don’t like me I like you a lot xxx

Pmsl

Well I've got one fan.....

If you're bold, you don't make em easy on here lol

Just to say one thing to balance what I've already said.....

I spoke to a guy on here years ago for 6 weeks before I met him. The first initial sex meet wasn't the best...infact probably up there as one of the worst. Three years on and we had the best times with each other, experimental etc...Thankyou for the advice I wish you well xxx

What I'm trying to say OP. Sometimes you could miss out on those experiences, if you lack communication from the start.....

What have you got to lose?

Wishing you well ..... "

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By *ischer400777 OP   Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"Ferocious fem even if you don’t like me I like you a lot xxx

Pmsl

Well I've got one fan.....

If you're bold, you don't make em easy on here lol

Just to say one thing to balance what I've already said.....

I spoke to a guy on here years ago for 6 weeks before I met him. The first initial sex meet wasn't the best...infact probably up there as one of the worst. Three years on and we had the best times with each other, experimental etc...Thankyou for the advice I wish you well xxx

What I'm trying to say OP. Sometimes you could miss out on those experiences, if you lack communication from the start.....

What have you got to lose?

Wishing you well ..... "

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