FabSwingers.com forum: Advice to you men… genuine

By *ewCoup7e OP Couple
over a year ago

Fulham

We have seen various posts from single men, some simply highlighting some complaining they don’t get replies back. We have replied to a few such requests today, we politely declined the offer, stating that although we will be looking for single men to join us, that we won’t be doing that just yet. Some of you have politely accepted that, and we thank you. However others seem to take that as an invitation to: send multiple messages (10+) friend requests, winks, follow on questions. Please respect our decision, this only prevents us from politely responding to other men’s advances and making us look rude. We are not… but take the flipping hint!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Use the block button

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By *ewCoup7e OP Couple
over a year ago

Fulham

Done! Thank you

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By *ustLooking123499Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

Sadly the response(s) of more than a minority of single men spoil the experience for the rest of us, and create unnecessary noise which is difficult to cut through. Only yesterday a female friend of mine received a very abusive message from a single male after she had very politely said thanks but no thanks. Thankfully he was reported by a number of us and his profile is no more, but it is that kind of behaviour which gives the rest of us a bad name.

To those of you who have received messages like those, I apologise on behalf of the male species. It is behaviour which should be called out at every opportunity, on here and in life more generally.

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

Yep use the block button ..works a treat !! and why do some males think us couples/single females have to justify or give a reason why ??????

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I have to say that we rarely get rude responses even from people who don't use the forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One guy messaged me a very explicit message about all the things he wanted to do. After I declined I got a message back saying "well you're a fat ugly cunt anyway". I wouldn't have minded but he hadn't even seen my pics yet!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I appreciate you for taking time to send replies to all the people. Most people do not reply unless they like to meet that person, which is also fine by the way. But as pointed above, if someone can't take no for an answer, feel free to block them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does anyone think there should be a way of apologising if you get blocked, I have been blocked and I have obviously misread the situation but it would be nice if you could send an apology and then its up to then if you got another chance

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By *Ci LutherMan
over a year ago

Cumalot

I feel your pain, I’d like a polite reply, however I do accept that it’s hard to keep on top, and as above there’s plenty of men who like to spoil it for us polite guys and don’t deserve a reply

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Does anyone think there should be a way of apologising if you get blocked, I have been blocked and I have obviously misread the situation but it would be nice if you could send an apology and then its up to then if you got another chance"

No I don't. Someone has clearly indicated they want no further contact, that should be respected

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By *harlotteBigBoobsWoman
over a year ago

Hull

In the past ive always replied to messages, even to say a polite thankyou ive replied to all, but not anymore. Not after the vile abusive messages ive recieved back from some of them. Now i just delete, even then still get abusive when i just delete so not wasting my time been polite anymore, Only reply to those im interested in

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By *harlotteBigBoobsWoman
over a year ago

Hull

"One guy messaged me a very explicit message about all the things he wanted to do. After I declined I got a message back saying "well you're a fat ugly cunt anyway". I wouldn't have minded but he hadn't even seen my pics yet!! "

I get this all the time, same as you guy hadnt seen my face pic yet he messaged saying oh my god you are gorgeous , what i fantastic body gorgeous boobs id love to meet you. I replied with im sorry your 200 miles im not interested. I got back well f''k yiu then you ugly cow and by the way youve only got big boobs cos your fat lol

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By *agerMorganMan
over a year ago

Canvey Island

A lot of blokes i've noticed don't know how to deal with a polite "No thank you".

Has it bruised their ego? Probably. But you shouldn't ever have to justify why you're saying no.

I've messaged a few & got no replies, am I upset about it? Nope, such is life & they don't owe it to me.

Just wish it were easier to implement a feature along the lines of 3 months or X forum posts before you can DM. Would eliminate a lot of the wallies looking for a quick fix.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People block for so many reasons. It's just that they may not be looking for the same thing as you. Or they found someone else and didn't want to continue chatting with you(though saying it openly would be polite). I have an extremely specific saved search and I block profiles coming up there which are 100% mismatch for me, like women who mention that they won't meet Asians, women who say they want a cock or minimum X inches or women who want someone muscular. I block them even though I haven't chatted with them, simply because I don't want these profiles showing up in my search.

No matter what the reason is, I don't think allowing an apology or any sort of communication after blocking will help anyone in anyway.

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By *ad_Bod_ToddMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Any user should feel free to block and report any and all abuse received.

Abusive messages from people who have such a high sense of entitlement are not desired or wanted in this lifestyle and community, IMHO.

Maybe it would be a nice feature if profiles that receive multiple blocks (in a short space of time) automatically had their account suspended for a period of maybe 24hrs or a couple of days perhaps? Would allow those users the space and time to calm down and think about what they've done. A bit like being put on the naughty step!

I've noticed on the forums that some people seem reticent to block a user as they feel that it is rude or unwarranted. Maybe 'lighten' or 'normalise' the blocking experience by having a (non-mandatory) feature that allows the blocker to tick a box with a prefilled reason why they are blocking which is automatically sent to the person being blocked?

Reasons could be:

1. Not looking to meet anyone at the moment.

2. Too far away or can't accommodate.

3. Not what I/we are looking for.

4. Multiple unwanted messages received.

5. Abusive message(s) received.

OP (and others) I was saddened to hear that you received such abuse. Please don't take it to heart, not everyone on here is like that.

Best wishes.

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By *harlotteBigBoobsWoman
over a year ago

Hull

"Any user should feel free to block and report any and all abuse received.

Abusive messages from people who have such a high sense of entitlement are not desired or wanted in this lifestyle and community, IMHO.

Reasons could be:

1. Not looking to meet anyone at the moment.

2. Too far away or can't accommodate.

3. Not what I/we are looking for.

4. Multiple unwanted messages received.

5. Abusive message(s) received.

OP (and others) I was saddened to hear that you received such abuse. Please don't take it to heart, not everyone on here is like that.

Best wishes. "
this is a very good idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have seen various posts from single men, some simply highlighting some complaining they don’t get replies back. We have replied to a few such requests today, we politely declined the offer, stating that although we will be looking for single men to join us, that we won’t be doing that just yet. Some of you have politely accepted that, and we thank you. However others seem to take that as an invitation to: send multiple messages (10+) friend requests, winks, follow on questions. Please respect our decision, this only prevents us from politely responding to other men’s advances and making us look rude. We are not… but take the flipping hint!

In fairness you can’t blame a guy trying when there’s a dish like yours on offer x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally don’t approach couples as they are usually quite prescriptive and over subscribed

It is nice to get a polite no thanks rather than being ignored which although I understand there’s no obligation I find a little rude

Blocking immediately is just rude, unless you have that on your profile as a Warning that you will do that.

I have had a few couples make an approach then ignore your response, rude lol

It’s like any commodity, the couple are in charge of who they supply, accept it, don’t be rude even if they are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we no longer reply unless theres an interest from us we learnt a long long time ago that replying was not the answer due to abuse or other thinking that because we replied there something to grab hold of ....

we are also very heavy blockers as again we've leant going forward that these people dont and wont take no for a answer just give iot a few weeks an bang they are back again ....

as for those saying it those guys that ruin it for good guys sorry its not they only ruin it for themselves so stop using it as an excuse .... they only excuse a guy can use on this site thats stopping them from meets or answers is the sheer volume on guys on here nothing else....

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