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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. " This  | |||
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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. " This | |||
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"I do, as do many on here but won't admit to it on the forums. Tested monthly (when meeting) always clear xx" | |||
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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. "
Not worth it | |||
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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. " Definitely this! | |||
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"Who does it? I usually go safe but have got lost in the moment 3 times " Russian roulette... Scuba is safer.  | |||
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"With the rise in antibiotic resistant STI's we are always amazed that people still go BB. I took my first urethral swab from a married man in the 1980s who was surprised he had gonorrhoea and had probably infected his wife" There have been less than 5 confirmed cases of N. gonorrhoea in the UK - and those infections were contracted in Europe. More importantly, and this is where CONTEXT is vital, all but ONE of those cases were pharyngeal infections affecting the throat. So, when you all talk about safe sex, I hope you're wearing condoms/dental dams for oral as well (though I very much doubt it). | |||
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"It amazes me amount of people that say they get tested. Getting tested doesn’t stop you catching something it just tells you you have something or not. If you have BB sex with someone and pick up a STI then have sex with say 10 people before your next test , you have just passed that on to 10 people before you realise you have something….. some people have no idea " | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of absolute rubbish. " | |||
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"How else am I supposed to feed it to my husband? On a serious note though, as stated earlier, don’t just jump into bed with anyone and test regularly etc etc. It’s a big king for us, he almost nuts in his cage witnessing a superior man pump his cum into his wifes pussy. Good times! Each to their own though, eh?" Kink* not king | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. "russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote) | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)"Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.  | |||
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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. Definitely this! "Yes why risk it? Health is paramount. | |||
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"Who does it? I usually go safe but have got lost in the moment 3 times " You have no control. Its no excuse saying, "got lost in the moment". That's just stupid and very dangerous. | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please. "It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual. Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments. Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm. Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it?? Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems. Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch. But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers. | |||
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"Always intend to but sometimes things happen and it goes out the window. Checked regularly regardless. " Is your garden full of unused condoms that have been thrown out the window? | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.
It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual.
Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments.
Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm.
Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it??
Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems.
Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch.
But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers.
"Here we go again! I am sick and tired of this. Yet another high handed, I am so bloody righteous, person lectures another forum member about 1 sentence in their post. "Learn about what you are talking about" - the standard "Soshal Meeja" cliché used to try and discredit without evidence to support it. Then the leap to the false accusation "... you bare back with strangers" to try and curry favour with your readers without any evidence to support that claim. If you were intellectually capable of understanding what I had written you would have seen my point was about RISK not the exceptional situation of catching two kinds HIV/AIDs and its affect on the body. So from a risk point of view let us address that issue. The Terrance Higgins trust estimates that there are 105,000 people in the UK living with aids. 101,000 are known about so let us assume they are being treated by the NHS and conservatively 50% have a viral load too low to infect others. That leaves 59,000 potential people to infect a barebacker. There are around 66 million in the uk. 11.7 million are under 16. So the potential sex group is 54.3 million. Of that group those living with HIV (59,000) represent 0.11% or 1:920. The estimated HIV risk per exposure (i.e. Sex with a known sufferer) for HIV is, for vaginal sex 1:2380 for the male and 1:1234 for the woman. Anal is riskier of course. So statistically the chances of a woman catching 1 kind of aids in the UK is 1:1,135,280. If we consider two kinds of HIV/AIDS you are so worried about it is an eye-watering 1:1,288,860,678,400. The risk of dying in a lifetime from being struck by lightening is 1:180,746 and dying in a car accident is 1:106. There; a Risk assessment for your scenario. | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.
It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual.
Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments.
Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm.
Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it??
Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems.
Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch.
But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers.
Here we go again! I am sick and tired of this. Yet another high handed, I am so bloody righteous, person lectures another forum member about 1 sentence in their post. "Learn about what you are talking about" - the standard "Soshal Meeja" cliché used to try and discredit without evidence to support it. Then the leap to the false accusation "... you bare back with strangers" to try and curry favour with your readers without any evidence to support that claim.
If you were intellectually capable of understanding what I had written you would have seen my point was about RISK not the exceptional situation of catching two kinds HIV/AIDs and its affect on the body. So from a risk point of view let us address that issue.
The Terrance Higgins trust estimates that there are 105,000 people in the UK living with aids. 101,000 are known about so let us assume they are being treated by the NHS and conservatively 50% have a viral load too low to infect others. That leaves 59,000 potential people to infect a barebacker.
There are around 66 million in the uk. 11.7 million are under 16. So the potential sex group is 54.3 million. Of that group those living with HIV (59,000) represent 0.11% or 1:920.
The estimated HIV risk per exposure (i.e. Sex with a known sufferer) for HIV is, for vaginal sex 1:2380 for the male and 1:1234 for the woman. Anal is riskier of course.
So statistically the chances of a woman catching 1 kind of aids in the UK is 1:1,135,280. If we consider two kinds of HIV/AIDS you are so worried about it is an eye-watering 1:1,288,860,678,400.
The risk of dying in a lifetime from being struck by lightening is 1:180,746 and dying in a car accident is 1:106. There; a Risk assessment for your scenario.
"Why is it about death? It's a life changing illness, PrEP even has it's complications of long term usage. Besides having the HIV diagnosis the drugs to keep you alive have long term complications of causing multi organ damage and other issues. Estimated at least 6000 in the UK undiagnosed and can remain a healthy adult for up to 10 years not knowing their HIV status unless they get regular testing. Then add in variables of people coming to the UK, people going out of the UK. How many stories online of people getting intoxicated and having sex on holiday. Heck the antibacterial resistant gonorrhea arrived here in exactly such a way named the super gonorrhea. 1 man's sexual habits, just 1 having sex abroad and bringing it home to his regular sexual UK partner. Then cases have multiplied. It only takes 1 to create an epidemic if it isn't treated. Imagine an infected undiagnosed person with HIV with an active sex life with multiple partners, then those partners have multiple partners. Imagine how many people can be infected in a swinging community if they all thought the same. Again il say informed consent. It is an offence in the UK to intentionally or recklessly cause sexual transmission of an infection. So lying about regular testing and/or it's result and infecting someone is a crime if by their behaviour alone. Then let's add in ste@lthing which is a criminal offence in the UK as of 2020. Reckless transmission - where the possible chance of infection via having unprotected sex then proceed to take that risk with another knowing there is possible chance due to having unprotected sex that a risk of being infected thus infecting another is foreseen and only reasonableness is dependent on if circumstances were unknown to the other person. So informed consent!! If you don't tell someone you take such risks and you do infect them, I regret to inform barebackers who do not inform their sexual partner/s, it's a criminal offence It's not just an infection if you have to do time for it also. Is the risk really worth it? | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please. "It's commonly assumed that there is a 1in 6 chance with Russian Roulette but it's actually less than that. The weight of the bullet in a well maintained revolver throws the odds as it is, with gravity, more likely to stop with that bullet nearer the bottom than the top of the weapon so actually becomes more like 1 in 15 | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.
It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual.
Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments.
Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm.
Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it??
Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems.
Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch.
But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers.
Here we go again! I am sick and tired of this. Yet another high handed, I am so bloody righteous, person lectures another forum member about 1 sentence in their post. "Learn about what you are talking about" - the standard "Soshal Meeja" cliché used to try and discredit without evidence to support it. Then the leap to the false accusation "... you bare back with strangers" to try and curry favour with your readers without any evidence to support that claim.
If you were intellectually capable of understanding what I had written you would have seen my point was about RISK not the exceptional situation of catching two kinds HIV/AIDs and its affect on the body. So from a risk point of view let us address that issue.
The Terrance Higgins trust estimates that there are 105,000 people in the UK living with aids. 101,000 are known about so let us assume they are being treated by the NHS and conservatively 50% have a viral load too low to infect others. That leaves 59,000 potential people to infect a barebacker.
There are around 66 million in the uk. 11.7 million are under 16. So the potential sex group is 54.3 million. Of that group those living with HIV (59,000) represent 0.11% or 1:920.
The estimated HIV risk per exposure (i.e. Sex with a known sufferer) for HIV is, for vaginal sex 1:2380 for the male and 1:1234 for the woman. Anal is riskier of course.
So statistically the chances of a woman catching 1 kind of aids in the UK is 1:1,135,280. If we consider two kinds of HIV/AIDS you are so worried about it is an eye-watering 1:1,288,860,678,400.
The risk of dying in a lifetime from being struck by lightening is 1:180,746 and dying in a car accident is 1:106. There; a Risk assessment for your scenario.
Why is it about death? It's a life changing illness, PrEP even has it's complications of long term usage.
Besides having the HIV diagnosis the drugs to keep you alive have long term complications of causing multi organ damage and other issues.
Estimated at least 6000 in the UK undiagnosed and can remain a healthy adult for up to 10 years not knowing their HIV status unless they get regular testing.
Then add in variables of people coming to the UK, people going out of the UK.
How many stories online of people getting intoxicated and having sex on holiday.
Heck the antibacterial resistant gonorrhea arrived here in exactly such a way named the super gonorrhea.
1 man's sexual habits, just 1 having sex abroad and bringing it home to his regular sexual UK partner. Then cases have multiplied.
It only takes 1 to create an epidemic if it isn't treated.
Imagine an infected undiagnosed person with HIV with an active sex life with multiple partners, then those partners have multiple partners.
Imagine how many people can be infected in a swinging community if they all thought the same.
Again il say informed consent.
It is an offence in the UK to intentionally or recklessly cause sexual transmission of an infection.
So lying about regular testing and/or it's result and infecting someone is a crime if by their behaviour alone.
Then let's add in ste@lthing which is a criminal offence in the UK as of 2020.
Reckless transmission - where the possible chance of infection via having unprotected sex then proceed to take that risk with another knowing there is possible chance due to having unprotected sex that a risk of being infected thus infecting another is foreseen and only reasonableness is dependent on if circumstances were unknown to the other person.
So informed consent!! If you don't tell someone you take such risks and you do infect them, I regret to inform barebackers who do not inform their sexual partner/s, it's a criminal offence
It's not just an infection if you have to do time for it also.
Is the risk really worth it?"Good response. No personal insults - thank you. The statistics for infected people already cover the one person infects several aspect. So although you are right in what you say about how that transmission can happened, that affect is already included in the transmission statistic. Death is what most people are bothered about as it sounds so dramatic, so I addressed that; other affects are available. The treatment for HIV/AIDS is not nice and I personally don't want it either, but the statistical liklihood of getting it is very small. Admittedly if you do the effect is 100% but the chances are very very low you will find someone and catch it as I pointed out. So from a risk point of view it is far less risky than the vast majority of everyday risks. To knowingly seek to infect someone with a serious illness is a crime. So is tripping them up on the street or even threatening them without touching them. STI testing and treatment in the uk is free so everyone should be tested regularly if they have multiple partners. If they have HIV/AIDS they must tell sexual partners. However the danger still lies where those who use condoms all the time believe they are 100% protected and do not get tested. They can still be infected and not know it. Should you tell someone you have sex with others unprotected? Well if for example a man has unprotected sex with 50 people he could be infected and potentially he should tell his partners. However, if he then gets tested and it is negative those previous 50 are struck from the equasion and he is back to first time from an infection point of view. Which is why regular testing is right to reduce risks and transmission. If the partner is concerened they can request a condom be used and he MUST wear one or it is r*pe (i.e. consent was based on the wearing of a condom). If condoms work then if he was infected by number 51 the next partner (number 52) will be protected, wont they? People have have the right to live their life as they chose. We assess risks every day throughout our lives. There are many who drive every day but are afraid of flying yet the chances of dying in a plane crash is around 1:24,000. This debate will go on for as long as Fab has a forum. My interest is in getting the STI risk viewed in proportion and in context. | |||
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"This whole bareback discussion just runs and runs and a new thread is started on at least once a week. There is no point anyone taking a position on it because it is about personal preference and appetite for risk. And we are all different in that regard. Very good post, wish more were honest, the fact is we love it, and have met many people who are the same, but won't say it on here because of people having ago at them. xx Sexually if someone has an almost zero acceptance of risk, then they will be celibate. Next up comes those in monogamous relationships. Then those who are single and playing the field. By the nature of being a swinger we are all already in a higher risk group due to having multiple partners (sometime simultaneously) whether “safe” sex or bareback. The level of risk we are each comfortable with means we take steps to try and reduce that risk (not eliminate as that is impossible unless you are celibate). So, for example, many people insist on condoms for penetration but not for oral. That isn’t safe but it IS of lower risk than bareback. But as said, it still carries risk. Bareback once in a while is statistically less risk than all the time. Bareback gay gangbangs with no advance STD testing would probably rate as amongst the highest risk activity. But some chaps enjoy the excitement and danger of this anyway. All any of us can hope for is that our chosen partners are honest. I/we totally respect someone declaring they enjoy bareback on their profile. Good luck to them, thanks for being honest, for us you represent too much risk, so we will pass you by, but have fun! " | |||
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"Only with my other half I wouldn't risk it on here. " | |||
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"I do, as do many on here but won't admit to it on the forums. Tested monthly (when meeting) always clear xx" If you ever need a load or two, happy to help xx  | |||
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"Love it. Nowt filthier than spraying inside with spunk. Be picky who you meet though. Thankfully I've always stayed std free yay." Sti are not picky | |||
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"The age old bareback topic where 90% of the comments are about bullshit. Don't do bareback my arse. Never caught a thing in 21 years of been sexually active I wont put my number but I've used a condom in 2% of experiences. I dont shag tramps, the majority of women and couples on here are respectful clean people and I trust that they don't go gung ho." You don’t have to believe it, just like people don’t have to believe you’ve never caught a thing in 21 years of being sexually active. I don’t do bareback with people I’m not in a relationship with personally, I don’t really care if others believe me or not. Some people are happy to take more risks than others and that’s totally fine, it’s also fine to not want to. Besides not everyone who has had an STI is a “tramp”. If it were that easy we’d all be able to avoid being infected surely… I mean one of the most common STI’s chlamydia very regularly has no symptoms for those infected… | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. " Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching? | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching? "Amen ?? x | |||
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"Who does it? I usually go safe but have got lost in the moment 3 times If you have gone bare three times, then you lose the right to say that you play safe.. I don’t care how excited you got, grow up and take some responsibility for yourself " | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching? "So I take it you never wear a seatbelt, you never look both ways crossing the road, you never make sure food is cooked properly, because why would people do such a thing if not for the risks it poses. Trust me I've met people who boast about never having been to an sexual health clinic and never had tests and they are well past their 40s and 50s because they said they've never had symptoms so why bother. There's people who bareback only but their "regular testing" is once every 6 months. It's a joke to those people because they don't care. It's the "oh I'd know if I had something" or the ones who say "my work makes me get annual health screening" those don't include sexual health tests and once a year isn't regular. My biggest gripe with all of this are the liars. I don't want to have sex with people who bareback strangers and that's my right to choose. It's all about informed consent but those people who think wearing a condom and telling someone they only do safer sex is wrong. Informed consent again and again. Condoms aren't 100% protection So when someone doesn't want to have sex with someone because they choose to have bareback sex with strangers then be honest. Those lying just to get a fuck... they are the ones who need to sort themselves out. I will preach this day and night!! Informed consent! Do what you want with your body but I get to choose what to do with mine as does everyone else who doesn't want to take the higher risks. The legality of it all, lying just to have a bit of fun. I understand risk is a thrill for many but it isn't just you there's the other person/s to consider. There's no consent in lies. | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.
It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual.
Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments.
Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm.
Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it??
Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems.
Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch.
But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers.
Here we go again! I am sick and tired of this. Yet another high handed, I am so bloody righteous, person lectures another forum member about 1 sentence in their post. "Learn about what you are talking about" - the standard "Soshal Meeja" cliché used to try and discredit without evidence to support it. Then the leap to the false accusation "... you bare back with strangers" to try and curry favour with your readers without any evidence to support that claim.
If you were intellectually capable of understanding what I had written you would have seen my point was about RISK not the exceptional situation of catching two kinds HIV/AIDs and its affect on the body. So from a risk point of view let us address that issue.
The Terrance Higgins trust estimates that there are 105,000 people in the UK living with aids. 101,000 are known about so let us assume they are being treated by the NHS and conservatively 50% have a viral load too low to infect others. That leaves 59,000 potential people to infect a barebacker.
There are around 66 million in the uk. 11.7 million are under 16. So the potential sex group is 54.3 million. Of that group those living with HIV (59,000) represent 0.11% or 1:920.
The estimated HIV risk per exposure (i.e. Sex with a known sufferer) for HIV is, for vaginal sex 1:2380 for the male and 1:1234 for the woman. Anal is riskier of course.
So statistically the chances of a woman catching 1 kind of aids in the UK is 1:1,135,280. If we consider two kinds of HIV/AIDS you are so worried about it is an eye-watering 1:1,288,860,678,400.
The risk of dying in a lifetime from being struck by lightening is 1:180,746 and dying in a car accident is 1:106. There; a Risk assessment for your scenario.
Why is it about death? It's a life changing illness, PrEP even has it's complications of long term usage.
Besides having the HIV diagnosis the drugs to keep you alive have long term complications of causing multi organ damage and other issues.
Estimated at least 6000 in the UK undiagnosed and can remain a healthy adult for up to 10 years not knowing their HIV status unless they get regular testing.
Then add in variables of people coming to the UK, people going out of the UK.
How many stories online of people getting intoxicated and having sex on holiday.
Heck the antibacterial resistant gonorrhea arrived here in exactly such a way named the super gonorrhea.
1 man's sexual habits, just 1 having sex abroad and bringing it home to his regular sexual UK partner. Then cases have multiplied.
It only takes 1 to create an epidemic if it isn't treated.
Imagine an infected undiagnosed person with HIV with an active sex life with multiple partners, then those partners have multiple partners.
Imagine how many people can be infected in a swinging community if they all thought the same.
Again il say informed consent.
It is an offence in the UK to intentionally or recklessly cause sexual transmission of an infection.
So lying about regular testing and/or it's result and infecting someone is a crime if by their behaviour alone.
Then let's add in ste@lthing which is a criminal offence in the UK as of 2020.
Reckless transmission - where the possible chance of infection via having unprotected sex then proceed to take that risk with another knowing there is possible chance due to having unprotected sex that a risk of being infected thus infecting another is foreseen and only reasonableness is dependent on if circumstances were unknown to the other person.
So informed consent!! If you don't tell someone you take such risks and you do infect them, I regret to inform barebackers who do not inform their sexual partner/s, it's a criminal offence
It's not just an infection if you have to do time for it also.
Is the risk really worth it?
Good response. No personal insults - thank you.
The statistics for infected people already cover the one person infects several aspect. So although you are right in what you say about how that transmission can happened, that affect is already included in the transmission statistic.
Death is what most people are bothered about as it sounds so dramatic, so I addressed that; other affects are available.
The treatment for HIV/AIDS is not nice and I personally don't want it either, but the statistical liklihood of getting it is very small. Admittedly if you do the effect is 100% but the chances are very very low you will find someone and catch it as I pointed out. So from a risk point of view it is far less risky than the vast majority of everyday risks.
To knowingly seek to infect someone with a serious illness is a crime. So is tripping them up on the street or even threatening them without touching them.
STI testing and treatment in the uk is free so everyone should be tested regularly if they have multiple partners. If they have HIV/AIDS they must tell sexual partners. However the danger still lies where those who use condoms all the time believe they are 100% protected and do not get tested. They can still be infected and not know it.
Should you tell someone you have sex with others unprotected? Well if for example a man has unprotected sex with 50 people he could be infected and potentially he should tell his partners. However, if he then gets tested and it is negative those previous 50 are struck from the equasion and he is back to first time from an infection point of view. Which is why regular testing is right to reduce risks and transmission.
If the partner is concerened they can request a condom be used and he MUST wear one or it is r*pe (i.e. consent was based on the wearing of a condom). If condoms work then if he was infected by number 51 the next partner (number 52) will be protected, wont they?
People have have the right to live their life as they chose. We assess risks every day throughout our lives. There are many who drive every day but are afraid of flying yet the chances of dying in a plane crash is around 1:24,000.
This debate will go on for as long as Fab has a forum. My interest is in getting the STI risk viewed in proportion and in context. "Thank you for posting this level headed response. We all take risks in our daily lives and we all assess those risks and determine the precautions we will or will not take - often balancing the pleasure or convenience gained against the increased risk inherent in enjoying the pleasure. Education on the transmission of STIs, their short and long term effects, and frequent and easily available shame and stigma free testing is key here. In my experience, folks who choose to fuck without condoms (rather than those who slip-up and pretend it didn’t happen) test more regularly, myself included. All STIs are treatable, and often no more serious than other ailments that we can regularly catch from each other. Unfortunately, contracting an STI is still considered more shameful and ‘dirty’ than say, catching a bad stomach bug because, well unfortunately many of us still think sex is shameful and dirty. Crucially, anyone who judges folks for fucking without condoms should logically be sucking dick or eating pussy with protection too, and if they aren’t then their stance is a hypocritical one and based on emotion and not science. When we educate ourselves and each other on STIs, we can make informed decisions on the risks we are as individuals willing to take - which means we can then confidently and proudly go out into the big bad world and FUCK FUCK FUCK! (and get tested regularly whether we have symptoms or not.) Here’s to enjoying you and your partners’ bodies Oh, and also look both ways when crossing the road.  | |||
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""It's Russian roulette " What a load of a absolute rubbish. russian roulette is 1 in 6 chance chance of a single guy getting a meet is 1 in 10000 so thats 1 in 60000 chance of getting 6 different my maths gives up (quote)
Oh dear, maths failure there. Russian roulette has a 1:6 chance of actually killing you. No treated STI can now kill you, even HIV/AIDS. But smoking can kill you, alcohol can, obesity can, vehicle accidents can, drugs can, mountain climbing, flying in a plane, base jumping, being hit when crossing the street! Life Risks in proportion and no hyperbole about STIs please.
It may not kill you now maybe in the distant future, you're in a western country with access to drugs to treat the trending strain of HIV here. The drugs don't work on other strains, the companies don't invest as much finding treatments for them as they tend not to spread in richer countries. Then if you catch 2 strains of hiv well then ya more or less up shit creek without a paddle. It comes incredibly difficult to treat multiple strains in one individual.
Then you have the life time of taking medications and the substantial increase of other ailments.
Why do people not think beyond oh there's a drug for HIV now. Bunch of idiots who haven't a clue sat there risking their quality of life for an orgasm.
Also would you have sex with someone with HIV or would you stigmatise them for it??
Never know one day it may just well be you in that position because you didn't think beyond a few minutes of fun for a life time of problems.
Learn about what youre talking about before you speak. You only look stupid after and probably scratching your crotch.
But yeah you're right it's your body do what you like with it. Just make sure you give the chance so everyone you want to have sex with has informed consent informing them that you bareback with strangers.
Here we go again! I am sick and tired of this. Yet another high handed, I am so bloody righteous, person lectures another forum member about 1 sentence in their post. "Learn about what you are talking about" - the standard "Soshal Meeja" cliché used to try and discredit without evidence to support it. Then the leap to the false accusation "... you bare back with strangers" to try and curry favour with your readers without any evidence to support that claim.
If you were intellectually capable of understanding what I had written you would have seen my point was about RISK not the exceptional situation of catching two kinds HIV/AIDs and its affect on the body. So from a risk point of view let us address that issue.
The Terrance Higgins trust estimates that there are 105,000 people in the UK living with aids. 101,000 are known about so let us assume they are being treated by the NHS and conservatively 50% have a viral load too low to infect others. That leaves 59,000 potential people to infect a barebacker.
There are around 66 million in the uk. 11.7 million are under 16. So the potential sex group is 54.3 million. Of that group those living with HIV (59,000) represent 0.11% or 1:920.
The estimated HIV risk per exposure (i.e. Sex with a known sufferer) for HIV is, for vaginal sex 1:2380 for the male and 1:1234 for the woman. Anal is riskier of course.
So statistically the chances of a woman catching 1 kind of aids in the UK is 1:1,135,280. If we consider two kinds of HIV/AIDS you are so worried about it is an eye-watering 1:1,288,860,678,400.
The risk of dying in a lifetime from being struck by lightening is 1:180,746 and dying in a car accident is 1:106. There; a Risk assessment for your scenario.
Why is it about death? It's a life changing illness, PrEP even has it's complications of long term usage.
Besides having the HIV diagnosis the drugs to keep you alive have long term complications of causing multi organ damage and other issues.
Estimated at least 6000 in the UK undiagnosed and can remain a healthy adult for up to 10 years not knowing their HIV status unless they get regular testing.
Then add in variables of people coming to the UK, people going out of the UK.
How many stories online of people getting intoxicated and having sex on holiday.
Heck the antibacterial resistant gonorrhea arrived here in exactly such a way named the super gonorrhea.
1 man's sexual habits, just 1 having sex abroad and bringing it home to his regular sexual UK partner. Then cases have multiplied.
It only takes 1 to create an epidemic if it isn't treated.
Imagine an infected undiagnosed person with HIV with an active sex life with multiple partners, then those partners have multiple partners.
Imagine how many people can be infected in a swinging community if they all thought the same.
Again il say informed consent.
It is an offence in the UK to intentionally or recklessly cause sexual transmission of an infection.
So lying about regular testing and/or it's result and infecting someone is a crime if by their behaviour alone.
Then let's add in ste@lthing which is a criminal offence in the UK as of 2020.
Reckless transmission - where the possible chance of infection via having unprotected sex then proceed to take that risk with another knowing there is possible chance due to having unprotected sex that a risk of being infected thus infecting another is foreseen and only reasonableness is dependent on if circumstances were unknown to the other person.
So informed consent!! If you don't tell someone you take such risks and you do infect them, I regret to inform barebackers who do not inform their sexual partner/s, it's a criminal offence
It's not just an infection if you have to do time for it also.
Is the risk really worth it?
Good response. No personal insults - thank you.
The statistics for infected people already cover the one person infects several aspect. So although you are right in what you say about how that transmission can happened, that affect is already included in the transmission statistic.
Death is what most people are bothered about as it sounds so dramatic, so I addressed that; other affects are available.
The treatment for HIV/AIDS is not nice and I personally don't want it either, but the statistical liklihood of getting it is very small. Admittedly if you do the effect is 100% but the chances are very very low you will find someone and catch it as I pointed out. So from a risk point of view it is far less risky than the vast majority of everyday risks.
To knowingly seek to infect someone with a serious illness is a crime. So is tripping them up on the street or even threatening them without touching them.
STI testing and treatment in the uk is free so everyone should be tested regularly if they have multiple partners. If they have HIV/AIDS they must tell sexual partners. However the danger still lies where those who use condoms all the time believe they are 100% protected and do not get tested. They can still be infected and not know it.
Should you tell someone you have sex with others unprotected? Well if for example a man has unprotected sex with 50 people he could be infected and potentially he should tell his partners. However, if he then gets tested and it is negative those previous 50 are struck from the equasion and he is back to first time from an infection point of view. Which is why regular testing is right to reduce risks and transmission.
If the partner is concerened they can request a condom be used and he MUST wear one or it is r*pe (i.e. consent was based on the wearing of a condom). If condoms work then if he was infected by number 51 the next partner (number 52) will be protected, wont they?
People have have the right to live their life as they chose. We assess risks every day throughout our lives. There are many who drive every day but are afraid of flying yet the chances of dying in a plane crash is around 1:24,000.
This debate will go on for as long as Fab has a forum. My interest is in getting the STI risk viewed in proportion and in context.
Thank you for posting this level headed response. We all take risks in our daily lives and we all assess those risks and determine the precautions we will or will not take - often balancing the pleasure or convenience gained against the increased risk inherent in enjoying the pleasure. Education on the transmission of STIs, their short and long term effects, and frequent and easily available shame and stigma free testing is key here. In my experience, folks who choose to fuck without condoms (rather than those who slip-up and pretend it didn’t happen) test more regularly, myself included. All STIs are treatable, and often no more serious than other ailments that we can regularly catch from each other. Unfortunately, contracting an STI is still considered more shameful and ‘dirty’ than say, catching a bad stomach bug because, well unfortunately many of us still think sex is shameful and dirty. Crucially, anyone who judges folks for fucking without condoms should logically be sucking dick or eating pussy with protection too, and if they aren’t then their stance is a hypocritical one and based on emotion and not science. When we educate ourselves and each other on STIs, we can make informed decisions on the risks we are as individuals willing to take - which means we can then confidently and proudly go out into the big bad world and FUCK FUCK FUCK! (and get tested regularly whether we have symptoms or not.)
Here’s to enjoying you and your partners’ bodies
Oh, and also look both ways when crossing the road. "This is the first time I’ve ever posted - go easy ! | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching?
So I take it you never wear a seatbelt, you never look both ways crossing the road, you never make sure food is cooked properly, because why would people do such a thing if not for the risks it poses.
Trust me I've met people who boast about never having been to an sexual health clinic and never had tests and they are well past their 40s and 50s because they said they've never had symptoms so why bother.
There's people who bareback only but their "regular testing" is once every 6 months. It's a joke to those people because they don't care.
It's the "oh I'd know if I had something" or the ones who say "my work makes me get annual health screening" those don't include sexual health tests and once a year isn't regular.
My biggest gripe with all of this are the liars. I don't want to have sex with people who bareback strangers and that's my right to choose. It's all about informed consent but those people who think wearing a condom and telling someone they only do safer sex is wrong. Informed consent again and again. Condoms aren't 100% protection
So when someone doesn't want to have sex with someone because they choose to have bareback sex with strangers then be honest. Those lying just to get a fuck... they are the ones who need to sort themselves out.
I will preach this day and night!! Informed consent!
Do what you want with your body but I get to choose what to do with mine as does everyone else who doesn't want to take the higher risks.
The legality of it all, lying just to have a bit of fun. I understand risk is a thrill for many but it isn't just you there's the other person/s to consider.
There's no consent in lies."My word you need to get laid. | |||
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"It never fails to amaze us when you look at the profile of some of the most vitriolic people on this subject, ranting about others not playing safe and you see they are smokers! I'm sure many OPs use these posts just to wind others up. If you don't want to play without a condom then fine, thats your choice. Others have many different reasons for playing without and are fully aware of the risks but please don't try to force your views on people. Its called bullying." Absolutely well said | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching?
So I take it you never wear a seatbelt, you never look both ways crossing the road, you never make sure food is cooked properly, because why would people do such a thing if not for the risks it poses.
Trust me I've met people who boast about never having been to an sexual health clinic and never had tests and they are well past their 40s and 50s because they said they've never had symptoms so why bother.
There's people who bareback only but their "regular testing" is once every 6 months. It's a joke to those people because they don't care.
It's the "oh I'd know if I had something" or the ones who say "my work makes me get annual health screening" those don't include sexual health tests and once a year isn't regular.
My biggest gripe with all of this are the liars. I don't want to have sex with people who bareback strangers and that's my right to choose. It's all about informed consent but those people who think wearing a condom and telling someone they only do safer sex is wrong. Informed consent again and again. Condoms aren't 100% protection
So when someone doesn't want to have sex with someone because they choose to have bareback sex with strangers then be honest. Those lying just to get a fuck... they are the ones who need to sort themselves out.
I will preach this day and night!! Informed consent!
Do what you want with your body but I get to choose what to do with mine as does everyone else who doesn't want to take the higher risks.
The legality of it all, lying just to have a bit of fun. I understand risk is a thrill for many but it isn't just you there's the other person/s to consider.
There's no consent in lies.
My word you need to get laid."Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback. Needle in a haystack. But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way. I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter. Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare? Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no! So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion. If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break. Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex? Are they really that desperate to lie about it? I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts. People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does. That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference. So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know. | |||
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"I do, as do many on here but won't admit to it on the forums. Tested monthly (when meeting) always clear xx" Not just gorgeous... always honest too x | |||
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"The quoted part of the above is getting enormous, so I’ve left it out, but my reply is re the above… I think there’s 2 different views amongst Fabbers; there’s those who think that safe sex means using condoms with everyone they interact with on Fab. Then there’s those who play bare when they can but use condoms with you if you’re not into bare sex. I don’t think there’s any right or wrong really. All you can hope for is that people will be honest if you ask them a direct question. As my time on Fab has gone on and with Covid etc my appetite for risk has become tiny. I don’t want to play with a stranger, definitely not a stranger who’s been playing with another stranger who’ll have been playing with another etc etc and when you bring bareback into that it makes me run a mile. But everyone assesses their own risk. People can do what they like. " Well summed up . | |||
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"There is alot of talk saying that lots go BB on here. I find that hard to believe as its so hard just to find someone up for playing. It's getting more like a social site or the thrill of meeting." Plenty of regular players are playing bare a lot of the time. | |||
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"What are the odds? 1st time having sex and I get pregnant and chlamydia. Went the whole pregnancy not knowing until 3 months after giving birth in which I was 4 weeks over due. Only when I went to start depo and I was offered a std screen did I find out. How long would it have been if they hadn't offered it to me? 13/14 months no symptoms, it could have been much longer till I had known. I'm glad I never had sex with anyone else till after it was sorted. I then find not only that I had it, sent me for scans and it did it's damage scarring my tubes. All this before standard std screening is done in pregnancy He told me he was also a virgin. Look where that got me. So people quote all these odds as if they are safe from being that statistic. So yeah what was the odds of me not only getting pregnant and catching the only std I have ever had the 1st time I ever had sex. Yes treatable std but it did it's damage. Im not the only statistic of that happening. I was a young teen of a Catholic strict family. I've learnt my lesson education and experience. Odds of risk doesn't mean you won't catch anything. We all do things to minimise risk in life why is sex any different? We're human not super human. Prevention is better than treatment. Most swingers who bareback aren't going 13 months without being tested because that would be an exceptionally reckless thing to do. Most swingers who don't do bareback aren't even going 13 months without getting tested. So on that basis, your one-off personal experience that you had when you were sexually inexperienced and naive isn't reflective of the swinging community. Also "We all do things to minimise risk in life" is not wholly true, is it? If it were, none of us would be on here, none of us would drink, none of us would smoke etc. Risk, in its various forms, is part of the human experience, part of what makes us feel alive. Without it, life would be miserable. So why not just let consenting adults crack on and give it a rest with the preaching?
So I take it you never wear a seatbelt, you never look both ways crossing the road, you never make sure food is cooked properly, because why would people do such a thing if not for the risks it poses.
Trust me I've met people who boast about never having been to an sexual health clinic and never had tests and they are well past their 40s and 50s because they said they've never had symptoms so why bother.
There's people who bareback only but their "regular testing" is once every 6 months. It's a joke to those people because they don't care.
It's the "oh I'd know if I had something" or the ones who say "my work makes me get annual health screening" those don't include sexual health tests and once a year isn't regular.
My biggest gripe with all of this are the liars. I don't want to have sex with people who bareback strangers and that's my right to choose. It's all about informed consent but those people who think wearing a condom and telling someone they only do safer sex is wrong. Informed consent again and again. Condoms aren't 100% protection
So when someone doesn't want to have sex with someone because they choose to have bareback sex with strangers then be honest. Those lying just to get a fuck... they are the ones who need to sort themselves out.
I will preach this day and night!! Informed consent!
Do what you want with your body but I get to choose what to do with mine as does everyone else who doesn't want to take the higher risks.
The legality of it all, lying just to have a bit of fun. I understand risk is a thrill for many but it isn't just you there's the other person/s to consider.
There's no consent in lies.
My word you need to get laid.
Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback.
Needle in a haystack.
But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way.
I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter.
Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare?
Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no!
So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion.
If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break.
Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex?
Are they really that desperate to lie about it?
I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts.
People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does.
That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference.
So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know."What are you even on about? You're just ranting for the sake of it at this point. There's a truckload of assumptions (most of them made through insinuation) about us in there too, the problem with assumptions is they're often wrong. Now have yourself a wank and calm down. | |||
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"Who does it? I usually go safe but have got lost in the moment 3 times " I personally only like going bareback unless the woman I’m sleeping with would prefer that I wrap it up | |||
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" My word you need to get laid. Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback. Needle in a haystack. But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way. I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter. Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare? Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no! So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion. If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break. Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex? Are they really that desperate to lie about it? I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts. People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does. That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference. So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know. What are you even on about? You're just ranting for the sake of it at this point. There's a truckload of assumptions (most of them made through insinuation) about us in there too, the problem with assumptions is they're often wrong. Now have yourself a wank and calm down. "Sorry assumptions when it's what I've experienced?? Are you trying to invalidate the experiences I've had from men on here? I stopped meeting on here for that very reason. I don't have sex with people I don't know in any clubs for that very reason. EXPERIENCE!! The amount of guys who swear they only do safer sex and never bareback but they leave verifications about how much they loved cumming in pussy or ass and watching it leak out, or the ones who enjoy cumming in sloppy seconds. Yet they swear they never bareback. I've had many meets off here and far too many have resulted in terrible outcomes. Where I have to abstain and get tested just because they decided they wanted to fuck bare. They took my choice from me just because it feels better for them. So you want to know what I think of those people, I hope karma catches up. But yeah my 'assumptions' means they are without fact sorry to tell you that it's fact it's happened far too many times, even once is one too many. Don't invalidate a person's experience just because you feel attacked. If you feel offended then there's something to feel offended for not my fault if you feel it applies to you. My directed response to you was your comment of telling me to get laid. Again it won't be with anyone you know. Now you're telling me to go wank awww I have a fuck machine at least that's reliable it doesn't lie to me or treat me like a cum dumpster and it keeps going till I've had my orgasm. So again tell me I'm wrong, did I dream it all? | |||
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"Oh but it says safe sex on their profile".... good grief!!
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"People should assume that everyone they meet has had bareback sex. It's incredibly naive to think otherwise.
"Oh but it says safe sex on their profile".... good grief!!
"Agree with your sentiment but can absolutely 100% guarantee that in over 15yrs swinging together and 3yrs solo for MrB and 1yr solo for MrsB (before we met) we have never had bareback sex in a swinging context and have only had bareback sex in our lives with long term partners. Anyone asking for bareback gets a flat NO! And we stopped mid action once when a guy tried to slip in without having a condom on. He was sent packing. As per our first comment above, this is not a commentary on folks who do bareback. That is their choice. We clearly take more risks than a vanilla couple do but we have our limits and don’t cross them. Just our preference. | |||
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" My word you need to get laid. Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback. Needle in a haystack. But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way. I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter. Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare? Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no! So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion. If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break. Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex? Are they really that desperate to lie about it? I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts. People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does. That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference. So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know. What are you even on about? You're just ranting for the sake of it at this point. There's a truckload of assumptions (most of them made through insinuation) about us in there too, the problem with assumptions is they're often wrong. Now have yourself a wank and calm down.
Sorry assumptions when it's what I've experienced?? Are you trying to invalidate the experiences I've had from men on here?
I stopped meeting on here for that very reason. I don't have sex with people I don't know in any clubs for that very reason. EXPERIENCE!!
The amount of guys who swear they only do safer sex and never bareback but they leave verifications about how much they loved cumming in pussy or ass and watching it leak out, or the ones who enjoy cumming in sloppy seconds. Yet they swear they never bareback.
I've had many meets off here and far too many have resulted in terrible outcomes. Where I have to abstain and get tested just because they decided they wanted to fuck bare.
They took my choice from me just because it feels better for them.
So you want to know what I think of those people, I hope karma catches up.
But yeah my 'assumptions' means they are without fact sorry to tell you that it's fact it's happened far too many times, even once is one too many. Don't invalidate a person's experience just because you feel attacked.
If you feel offended then there's something to feel offended for not my fault if you feel it applies to you.
My directed response to you was your comment of telling me to get laid.
Again it won't be with anyone you know.
Now you're telling me to go wank awww I have a fuck machine at least that's reliable it doesn't lie to me or treat me like a cum dumpster and it keeps going till I've had my orgasm.
So again tell me I'm wrong, did I dream it all?
""Assumptions about us". Might help to read what has been said properly before you hit reply and go off on another rant. | |||
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" My word you need to get laid. Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback. Needle in a haystack. But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way. I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter. Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare? Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no! So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion. If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break. Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex? Are they really that desperate to lie about it? I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts. People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does. That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference. So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know. What are you even on about? You're just ranting for the sake of it at this point. There's a truckload of assumptions (most of them made through insinuation) about us in there too, the problem with assumptions is they're often wrong. Now have yourself a wank and calm down.
Sorry assumptions when it's what I've experienced?? Are you trying to invalidate the experiences I've had from men on here?
I stopped meeting on here for that very reason. I don't have sex with people I don't know in any clubs for that very reason. EXPERIENCE!!
The amount of guys who swear they only do safer sex and never bareback but they leave verifications about how much they loved cumming in pussy or ass and watching it leak out, or the ones who enjoy cumming in sloppy seconds. Yet they swear they never bareback.
I've had many meets off here and far too many have resulted in terrible outcomes. Where I have to abstain and get tested just because they decided they wanted to fuck bare.
They took my choice from me just because it feels better for them.
So you want to know what I think of those people, I hope karma catches up.
But yeah my 'assumptions' means they are without fact sorry to tell you that it's fact it's happened far too many times, even once is one too many. Don't invalidate a person's experience just because you feel attacked.
If you feel offended then there's something to feel offended for not my fault if you feel it applies to you.
My directed response to you was your comment of telling me to get laid.
Again it won't be with anyone you know.
Now you're telling me to go wank awww I have a fuck machine at least that's reliable it doesn't lie to me or treat me like a cum dumpster and it keeps going till I've had my orgasm.
So again tell me I'm wrong, did I dream it all?
"Assumptions about us". Might help to read what has been said properly before you hit reply and go off on another rant."Then you clearly can't comprehend what I've said. You made the assumptions on your own. If the shoe fits. It's just that simple, if you've taken offence to anything I've said as a personal attack then you must be one of those people who do the things I've mentioned. What part of explaining risks and trust me there are idiots who think having sex if they don't cum they can't get an std so they fuck bare out there. Idiots who think twice a year testing is regular. Idiots who think 1 test will prove a negative even though it can take months to test positive but can actually infect someone. Then there's those selfish bastards who think their desires only matter disregarding what a person has consented to. Then there's those who lie to get sex so the person doesn't have the facts in order to make an informed choice. Again where have I made assumptions about you? | |||
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" My word you need to get laid. Well I would if I could find someone who doesn't lie, doesn't treat me as an object and doesn't bareback. Needle in a haystack. But yeah you're right wouldn't it make a world of difference if people treated me as a human being who also has needs and not just some spunk dump because they want it that way. I'd rather go without than keep having guys think that only their desires and pleasures matter. Am I meant to be grateful they want to empty their load that they either deliberately break condoms or pull them off just because they prefer bare? Am I meant to disregard my desires and my concerns? No very simply no! So if making a point that if people want to bareback so be it go do it with people who want to. But they shouldn't say they do safe sex because they are willing to wear a condom on occasion. If people bareback strangers then why put safe sex on their profile because there's nothing safe about it. Condoms aren't 100% and they could slip off or accidentally break. Why can't people respect another's choice to have safer sex? Are they really that desperate to lie about it? I'm happy to be choosy who I want to have sex with and that's my choice. My decision to want informed consent, to make choices about my body with the facts. People have every right to bareback with who ever they want it's their body. But I have the right not to want to have sex with anyone who does. That's precisely where the problem is, not respecting that choice. Majority of barebackers think just because they will use a condom it makes no difference. So if I get laid it won't be anyone you know. What are you even on about? You're just ranting for the sake of it at this point. There's a truckload of assumptions (most of them made through insinuation) about us in there too, the problem with assumptions is they're often wrong. Now have yourself a wank and calm down.
Sorry assumptions when it's what I've experienced?? Are you trying to invalidate the experiences I've had from men on here?
I stopped meeting on here for that very reason. I don't have sex with people I don't know in any clubs for that very reason. EXPERIENCE!!
The amount of guys who swear they only do safer sex and never bareback but they leave verifications about how much they loved cumming in pussy or ass and watching it leak out, or the ones who enjoy cumming in sloppy seconds. Yet they swear they never bareback.
I've had many meets off here and far too many have resulted in terrible outcomes. Where I have to abstain and get tested just because they decided they wanted to fuck bare.
They took my choice from me just because it feels better for them.
So you want to know what I think of those people, I hope karma catches up.
But yeah my 'assumptions' means they are without fact sorry to tell you that it's fact it's happened far too many times, even once is one too many. Don't invalidate a person's experience just because you feel attacked.
If you feel offended then there's something to feel offended for not my fault if you feel it applies to you.
My directed response to you was your comment of telling me to get laid.
Again it won't be with anyone you know.
Now you're telling me to go wank awww I have a fuck machine at least that's reliable it doesn't lie to me or treat me like a cum dumpster and it keeps going till I've had my orgasm.
So again tell me I'm wrong, did I dream it all?
"Assumptions about us". Might help to read what has been said properly before you hit reply and go off on another rant.
Then you clearly can't comprehend what I've said. You made the assumptions on your own. If the shoe fits.
It's just that simple, if you've taken offence to anything I've said as a personal attack then you must be one of those people who do the things I've mentioned.
What part of explaining risks and trust me there are idiots who think having sex if they don't cum they can't get an std so they fuck bare out there.
Idiots who think twice a year testing is regular.
Idiots who think 1 test will prove a negative even though it can take months to test positive but can actually infect someone.
Then there's those selfish bastards who think their desires only matter disregarding what a person has consented to. Then there's those who lie to get sex so the person doesn't have the facts in order to make an informed choice.
Again where have I made assumptions about you? "Ok | |||
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