FabSwingers.com forum: Face Pics

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I understand that there are A LOT of guys on here, and people don’t want to waste any time, but requesting face pics up front when some of us (myself included) need some level of anonymity before committing to any kind of play, isn’t it unfair??

Just food for thought more than anything

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By *ola81Woman
over a year ago

pond

At least you have some pictures on your profile so I would be cool without face at first however, after a bit of a chat definitely I would like to see and I would send mine in return. But that's just me

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By *lappyMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I have nothing to hide so mines on my profile

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By *oirinMarkusCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands and West London

I agree OP. I am not willing to share my face over the internet, or to put it up on Fab- too risky with the technology of today and I don't want to jeopardise my career.

They need to tell me I'm ugly in person, but as a woman that is yet to happen!

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

"I understand that there are A LOT of guys on here, and people don’t want to waste any time, but requesting face pics up front when some of us (myself included) need some level of anonymity before committing to any kind of play, isn’t it unfair??

Just food for thought more than anything

Yes I find it very unfair that so many women want one with a first message.

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By *onb21Woman
over a year ago

Cardiff

It's entirely up to you but it is a bit awkward when you've been talking to someone for a while and finally reveal your face and it doesn't appeal. I think that's why some people want to know from the start.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If face pics requested, would a compromise between security and actually seeing each other be to Skype or WhatsApp video call?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't meet anyone without a face pic and would rather see one upfront otherwise there's the awkwardness if you don't find them attractive later on.

If someone won't send one either on here or on another platform we won't take the it any further. It doesn't matter how good their body is

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I understand why people won't send a face pic first message,

But I'd want to see one early on, to save wasting time, but I do send mine too.

I think if someone is requesting one and you're not comfortable sending, then you're not compatible. If neither wants to send, you'd end up going round on circles.

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By *ryharderCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

We don’t put face pics on here and don’t ask for them, we prefer to exchange a few messages first then meet for a quick coffee and social.

We find you can have great photos on here but when you meet there is no connection.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We don’t put face pics on here and don’t ask for them, we prefer to exchange a few messages first then meet for a quick coffee and social.

We find you can have great photos on here but when you meet there is no connection."

I do the same.

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By *ola81Woman
over a year ago

pond

"we prefer to exchange a few messages first then meet for a quick coffee and social.

We find you can have great photos on here but when you meet there is no connection."

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand employment being an issue. What job (s) are so sensitive that you going to be fired from for having your pic on a dating / swinging site??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Caution is key to sharing face pics.

What's to say someone won't take those face pics to set up fake profiles?

What if someone recognised you and decided to bl ackmail or send the photos to work mates, friends & family, if rejected? (It has happened a lot of times on here)

What if they was to go showing off the messages and photos between you and the person to their mates in the pub for bragging rights?

Not everyone on here is on here for the right reasons, so being careful is paramount in my oppinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand employment being an issue. What job (s) are so sensitive that you going to be fired from for having your pic on a dating / swinging site?? "

It depends on the nature of the photos.

If someone had a job in media, television, or was in the public eye, it would cost them their career.

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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Just food for thought more than anything

Surely things can only be unfair when you're not in control of the outcome?

If you don't agree with their 'contact terms' just move on - it really is as simple as that, and certainly not unfair.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I don't ask for face pics but I chat for a while before I agree to meet anyone anyhow and usually one of us sends a pic at some stage.

People demanding face pics but not sending one themselves first well they just get told no. I go by the idea if you want a face pic you send yours first.

Of course people can ask for whatever they want on here it doesn't mean that people have to comply with it though.

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By *isspurplechesterWoman
over a year ago

Chester

I don’t really like sending my face pic on a first message, so tend to avoid those that ask for it! I don’t have a problem sending it after a few messages though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand employment being an issue. What job (s) are so sensitive that you going to be fired from for having your pic on a dating / swinging site?? "

Education is one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

Definitely unfair.

Work and privacy should always be considered so meeting first before sharing anything is most important

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the replies!

I’m not against sending pics, just sending them blindly to people who I haven’t had the chance to get to know yet. I’d be happy to send one after a few messages, just have to make sure they’re not a not-right

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"At least you have some pictures on your profile so I would be cool without face at first however, after a bit of a chat definitely I would like to see and I would send mine in return. But that's just me

Exactly! I don’t mind verifying myself, but I can’t show my face straight off the bat

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I agree OP. I am not willing to share my face over the internet, or to put it up on Fab- too risky with the technology of today and I don't want to jeopardise my career.

They need to tell me I'm ugly in person, but as a woman that is yet to happen!"

I’m sure they have no reason to say you’re ugly

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's entirely up to you but it is a bit awkward when you've been talking to someone for a while and finally reveal your face and it doesn't appeal. I think that's why some people want to know from the start."

I understand that it saves time, but to not accept any message at all... I’m a really conversationalist too!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I understand why people won't send a face pic first message,

But I'd want to see one early on, to save wasting time, but I do send mine too.

I think if someone is requesting one and you're not comfortable sending, then you're not compatible. If neither wants to send, you'd end up going round on circles. "

Definitely! I’m willing to share one, just not straight away!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Isn’t it strange that we all look at each other’s boobs, cocks and pussies (to put it crudely) before our faces. You can tell more from a face than a cock, Can you not? But can you tell from a face that the person likes to take naked pictures of themselves?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

Surely things can only be unfair when you're not in control of the outcome?

If you don't agree with their 'contact terms' just move on - it really is as simple as that, and certainly not unfair.

It sounds like you don’t get ignored

‘Unfair’ may sound dramatic, but I read A LOT of profiles that have ‘face pics’ and I don’t message them as I respect that, but I’m finding it hard to match with profiles that have this contact term.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Well what can you do? You either send face pics to them or don’t contact them, entirely your choice - they’re not insisting that they hear from you, after all.

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By *istalloverCouple
over a year ago

Pays de la Loire -Normandie -Brittany borderFrance

Initially any pic is OK

But before a meet we always ask for a face pic as there has to be some element of facial attraction ,

Imagine travelling over a 100 miles and most of our fun is ,being in France

Only to be greeted by a Jimmy Saville or Dianne Abbott lookalike.(only examples, no need to get angry if you look like them or fancy them )

A face pic saves alot of time and we always send a pic in return as we are not everybody's cup of tea either,

But had to adopt a no pic no meet attitude to out false profiles.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Caution is key to sharing face pics.

What's to say someone won't take those face pics to set up fake profiles?

What if someone recognised you and decided to bl ackmail or send the photos to work mates, friends & family, if rejected? (It has happened a lot of times on here)

What if they was to go showing off the messages and photos between you and the person to their mates in the pub for bragging rights?

Not everyone on here is on here for the right reasons, so being careful is paramount in my oppinion."

100% agree to all of this

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Initially any pic is OK

But before a meet we always ask for a face pic as there has to be some element of facial attraction ,

Imagine travelling over a 100 miles and most of our fun is ,being in France

Only to be greeted by a Jimmy Saville or Dianne Abbott lookalike.(only examples, no need to get angry if you look like them or fancy them )

A face pic saves alot of time and we always send a pic in return as we are not everybody's cup of tea either,

But had to adopt a no pic no meet attitude to out false profiles. "

Yeah definitely before a meet, but it’s interesting to hear about the fake profiles, I’ve not thought of that before.

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Just food for thought more than anything

Caution is fine but equally it that person's profile it is their rules. You don't have to send a face pics but equally they don't have to respond or engage with you if you don't.

Alls fair in love and fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well what can you do? You either send face pics to them or don’t contact them, entirely your choice - they’re not insisting that they hear from you, after all."

It’s the sheer volume of people that ask for them.

Imagine you come across a profile, it catches your eye, look at the pics, sexy as hell, you read the bio, you have things in common, it’s all looking good until you get to the end and it says ‘face pics on first message or you’re straight in the bin’ ... after a while it’s a little frustrating.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

Caution is fine but equally it that person's profile it is their rules. You don't have to send a face pics but equally they don't have to respond or engage with you if you don't.

Alls fair in love and fab

I get that people have their preferences, and they get a lot of messages. However, not everyone can show their face without at first exchanging a few messages.

I can live with being ignored, but on the grounds that I won’t send face pics straight away?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t send a face pic unless I’ve chatted a while and feel comfortable doing so

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

Caution is fine but equally it that person's profile it is their rules. You don't have to send a face pics but equally they don't have to respond or engage with you if you don't.

Alls fair in love and fab

I get that people have their preferences, and they get a lot of messages. However, not everyone can show their face without at first exchanging a few messages.

I can live with being ignored, but on the grounds that I won’t send face pics straight away?!

We ask for face pics because we wouldn’t want to waste time talking to people we’d never meet. Our free time is very limited so we think it’s a fair request. We rarely message people on here but when we do we would send a face pic with our first message as well.

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"I get that people have their preferences, and they get a lot of messages. However, not everyone can show their face without at first exchanging a few messages.

I can live with being ignored, but on the grounds that I won’t send face pics straight away?!

But as I said earlier it is their profile they can do what they want.

Would you rather that after talking for a few messages they ask for a face photo and then either block you or tell you straight that you are not what they are looking for. There are numerous threads at the moment where people are moaning about being blocked after talking for a while.

You can please some of the people some of the time.

If they want a photo and you don't want to provide one then move on to another profile. Neither of you should be forcing the other to change how they operate on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get that people have their preferences, and they get a lot of messages. However, not everyone can show their face without at first exchanging a few messages.

I can live with being ignored, but on the grounds that I won’t send face pics straight away?!

But as I said earlier it is their profile they can do what they want.

You can please some of the people some of the time.

If they want a photo and you don't want to provide one then move on to another profile. Neither of you should be forcing the other to change how they operate on here."

Exactly. Very well put

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By *harlotteBigBoobsWoman
over a year ago

Hull

I personally do ask for a face picture straight away , simply because i dont want to waste time chatting if not my type and vice versa,

I know i dont have a face picture set public thats simply because ive been messaged by people from work and people i know in th e osat and do try to be discreet but happily send once i see who im talking too

i wont carry on messaging if people not willing to show mw who they are x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't really understand the need for anonymity even say education as scribed above. Its not illegal to swing surely it shouldn't matter to employers what you do with your healthy sex life? Having said that, It probably would make some stuff difficult if say the pupils some how got a hold of your photos. Would have made my day if I had photos of my 5ft irish pe teacher Mrs telgin as a youngin. Absolutely magic.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I'm going to agree to meet someone if they aren't willing to share face photos early on.

Equally, it's highly unlikely that I will share face photos with someone I'm unlikely to meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't really understand the need for anonymity even say education as scribed above. Its not illegal to swing surely it shouldn't matter to employers what you do with your healthy sex life? Having said that, It probably would make some stuff difficult if say the pupils some how got a hold of your photos. Would have made my day if I had photos of my 5ft irish pe teacher Mrs telgin as a youngin. Absolutely magic."

We do ask for face pics but still understand the need for anonymity. We wouldn’t want family, friends or colleagues knowing that we’re on here.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Many of us work in jobs where "bringing the company into disrepute" or acting in a way deemed inappropriate could result in losing your job. Anything other than traditional monogamy is seen as inappropriate by many. It's not as simple as it be legal.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

"I personally do ask for a face picture straight away , simply because i dont want to waste time chatting if not my type and vice versa,

i wont carry on messaging if people not willing to show mw who they are x"

Why would you expect someone to send you their pic first though if you aren't willing to share yours first. It's a genuine question .Why expect them to send the first pic if you are asking for theirs surely you should be willing to send yours to them first.

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By *rs mischiefWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

I agree, totally. As when this has happened to me in the past, chatting without seeing a pic, I was accused of being a time waster, when I said I didn't fancy them.

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By *implynaughty1Couple
over a year ago

stockport

"I personally do ask for a face picture straight away , simply because i dont want to waste time chatting if not my type and vice versa,

i wont carry on messaging if people not willing to show mw who they are x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think you just answered that on your own mate.

I don’t work in education, but I do have a public job and I work with children. I’d say 85/90% of the people I deal wouldn’t understand this world, and that could effect my income.

Just because it’s not illegal, doesn’t mean some people would be comfortable with it.

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By *nimaginativeUsernameMan
over a year ago

Rochester, Kent

I don’t mind sending a face pic privately.

(Not one with me naked, just a ‘normal’ pic)

Ok someone could put my face pic next to a more (ahem) ‘private’ pic and try to embarrass me, but they could do that with a gorilla pic too, it would prove nothing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I get that people have their preferences, and they get a lot of messages. However, not everyone can show their face without at first exchanging a few messages.

I can live with being ignored, but on the grounds that I won’t send face pics straight away?!

But as I said earlier it is their profile they can do what they want.

You can please some of the people some of the time.

If they want a photo and you don't want to provide one then move on to another profile. Neither of you should be forcing the other to change how they operate on here."

I get it, it’s a good point. I think I was part venting and part wanting to alternative perspective on the people who can’t provide a face pic upfront that’s all

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By *edandLouCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

We've just been asked for face pics by somebody we were hoping to meet. We replied we never have or will swap face pics on here-that is just our choice.

We told the person we are happy to phone chat and hopefully then arrange a meeting but as yet that message has gone unanswered.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We've just been asked for face pics by somebody we were hoping to meet. We replied we never have or will swap face pics on here-that is just our choice.

We told the person we are happy to phone chat and hopefully then arrange a meeting but as yet that message has gone unanswered."

I don’t think a phone/ video call is unreasonable at all. Hope it pans out for you guys

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"We've just been asked for face pics by somebody we were hoping to meet. We replied we never have or will swap face pics on here-that is just our choice.

We told the person we are happy to phone chat and hopefully then arrange a meeting but as yet that message has gone unanswered."

If that would be a video chat, then that's as good as sharing photos.

I personally, think that it's unreasonable to expect to arrange to meet someone, without seeing what each other looks like. Many people have busy lives outside Fab and want to ensure there's some physical attraction in advance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We've just been asked for face pics by somebody we were hoping to meet. We replied we never have or will swap face pics on here-that is just our choice.

We told the person we are happy to phone chat and hopefully then arrange a meeting but as yet that message has gone unanswered.

If that would be a video chat, then that's as good as sharing photos.

Sharing pictures is different from a video call.

When you send someone a picture they can keep that for as long as they want and do anything with it.

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By *arol321Woman
over a year ago

Poole

As all my public pics are face pics I won’t talk to anyone who doesn’t send me a face pic with their first message or have one on their profile.

Very occasionally if I’m sent a really nice first message without a face pic I might ask for one but usually I just delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

We have a similar view and express in our profile how we like to do this.

Several times daily we are asked for face pics by randomers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/09/21 23:48:22]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you just answered that on your own mate.

I don’t work in education, but I do have a public job and I work with children. I’d say 85/90% of the people I deal wouldn’t understand this world, and that could effect my income.

Just because it’s not illegal, doesn’t mean some people would be comfortable with it. "

100% agree with everything you said. As a teaching assistant it could compromise my position and I’m unwilling to take the risk. Any reasonable lady / couple should understand and respect this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind chatting a bit first but before a meet of any kind I'd want to see a face pic it does make it easier to get one straight away though as I hate chatting with someone then I see there face and I'm not attracted to them I really hate letting people down.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just food for thought more than anything

We have a similar view and express in our profile how we like to do this.

Several times daily we are asked for face pics by randomers.

Read your bio and I think that’s a perfectly fine way to do it! I love how you’ve already provided how you want your dates to go too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't mind chatting a bit first but before a meet of any kind I'd want to see a face pic it does make it easier to get one straight away though as I hate chatting with someone then I see there face and I'm not attracted to them I really hate letting people down."

Yeah I’m the same, and it’s happened to me before too. It’s the ‘face pic or get ignored’ but I don’t like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly, I think I've only ever seen the "no face pic, no chat" on female profiles. And because the male/female ratios are ridiculously weighted in favour of ladies on here they can pretty much demand what they want! If one guy won't show his face another certainly will. I'm sure if the ratios were the other way round guys would do exactly the same.

I find it weird that people will meet without seeing someone's face first though. Why bother spending time getting dressed up etc for even a social to them turn up and think "oh, no thanks!"?

And from someone who has been the victim of catfishing before there's not a chance I'm doing a blind meet!

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