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Those who think they are jumping thro hoops to meet

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

See a lot of these messages of late mainly from guys who do nothing but moan when they see a profile of what people are looking for ….. is that not the whole point of swinging to fulfil the things you want sexually ? or is it a fact that a lot of men don’t like a woman who knows what she wants ??

I would never jump thro hoops for a meet so why do some guys think they have too ?? surely it’s a simple not for me rather than moan that it don’t suit you … I prefere to meet guys who know what they want if our wants match and hes hot then bring it on ..

So come on guys what is it that makes you think you have to jump thro hoops ?? when you could just simply say to yourself not for me ??

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By *rooperRedMan
over a year ago

Littlehampton

I read the profile and if there's something that I don't match, I wouldn't waste my time replying (although replying is a waste prime generally anyway). Like profiles which say no tattoos. I have one but there's no point trying to get around it. Same with age, distance, whatever. Although I have found a few female profiles which say "No profiles with dick pics!" and then you look at their verifications and it's all dudes with dick pics...

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Anyone who thinks they are having to jump through hoops to get a meet needs to have a rethink about their understanding and expectations of the site.

If a woman wants a man with 10 inch co.k and you haven't got one it's nothing to do with jumping through hoops it's a preference.

Why would anyone thing a woman who is a swinger lowers her standards just because she loves sex.

Moaners need to man up and up there game or pay a prostitute.

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

Virtually no one is meeting in our local area at the moment. They're either all off to clubs which are 50 miles away or waiting till lockdown ends.

My point is, it's all subjective and situational right now.

Even we as a couple feel like theres a lot of hoop jumping at the moment. Thers a lot of time wasters, picture hunters and wanna be's messaging us (and its not single men) then going radio silent the moment the word meet its mentioned.

Just have get on with it but right now fab is feeling like hard work rather than fun. It's all subjective and we all are having a different experiance but hopefully.it gets better soon.

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By *ischer400777Man
over a year ago

stanley county durham


"I read the profile and if there's something that I don't match, I wouldn't waste my time replying (although replying is a waste prime generally anyway). Like profiles which say no tattoos. I have one but there's no point trying to get around it. Same with age, distance, whatever. Although I have found a few female profiles which say "No profiles with dick pics!" and then you look at their verifications and it's all dudes with dick pics..."
could not agree more about the veris hypocrites

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Although I have found a few female profiles which say "No profiles with dick pics!" and then you look at their verifications and it's all dudes with dick pics..."

To be fair the dick pics may have been uploaded after the verification

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By *harlotteBigBoobsWoman
over a year ago

Hull

I get messages all the time saying why do bother when i dont want this or that ?

I say just trying to save peoples time but most important im not desperate or change my likes for a fuck !!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Virtually no one is meeting in our local area at the moment. They're either all off to clubs which are 50 miles away or waiting till lockdown ends.

My point is, it's all subjective and situational right now.

Even we as a couple feel like theres a lot of hoop jumping at the moment. Thers a lot of time wasters, picture hunters and wanna be's messaging us (and its not single men) then going radio silent the moment the word meet its mentioned.

Just have get on with it but right now fab is feeling like hard work rather than fun. It's all subjective and we all are having a different experiance but hopefully.it gets better soon."

its a general question not time specific ..

no one should feel they are humping thru hoops the point being your chasing the wrong people ?? its a bit like begging is it not ?? major turn off

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

*jumping lol not humping

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"I read the profile and if there's something that I don't match, I wouldn't waste my time replying (although replying is a waste prime generally anyway). Like profiles which say no tattoos. I have one but there's no point trying to get around it. Same with age, distance, whatever. Although I have found a few female profiles which say "No profiles with dick pics!" and then you look at their verifications and it's all dudes with dick pics..."

I think they mean don't send a dick pic with a first message.

It doesn't bother me but I'm more likely to reject a message with a dick pic attached as it sends a message that he thinks I'm only looking for a dick.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I don't send first contact messages and haven't done for 15 months.

I get very few messages but quite often a couple will contact me who clearly haven't read my profile and from the first sentence they are asking to meet, for me to send a face pic or on a couple of occasions to forward my phone number.

These are well verified couples by the way.

Some have just sent me a list of of the blue having never chatted before with instructions of what I must do if I want to meet them.

So while I'm not one of those complaining about "having" to jump through hoops because I never respond to that level of arrogance it's the fact that they make no attempt to read my profile or even engage in a proper conversation that makes me roll my eyes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone who thinks they are having to jump through hoops to get a meet needs to have a rethink about their understanding and expectations of the site.

If a woman wants a man with 10 inch co.k and you haven't got one it's nothing to do with jumping through hoops it's a preference.

Why would anyone thing a woman who is a swinger lowers her standards just because she loves sex.

Moaners need to man up and up there game or pay a prostitute. Boom this

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone who thinks they are having to jump through hoops to get a meet needs to have a rethink about their understanding and expectations of the site.

If a woman wants a man with 10 inch co.k and you haven't got one it's nothing to do with jumping through hoops it's a preference.

Why would anyone thing a woman who is a swinger lowers her standards just because she loves sex.

Moaners need to man up and up there game or pay a prostitute.

"

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Years ago I was chatting to someone, I make it clear any first meet is a social only

He was v grudging about it and said well since I have to jump through your hoops to meet you

I said don't bother if that's your attitude.

I don't think it's unfair for anyone on here to have their own preferences and want to meet people that they are attracted to and if others can't respect that or see it as having to jump through hoops, that's their issue.

I wouldn't message someone if I wasn't what they were after, what's the point.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"Years ago I was chatting to someone, I make it clear any first meet is a social only

He was v grudging about it and said well since I have to jump through your hoops to meet you

I said don't bother if that's your attitude.

I don't think it's unfair for anyone on here to have their own preferences and want to meet people that they are attracted to and if others can't respect that or see it as having to jump through hoops, that's their issue.

I wouldn't message someone if I wasn't what they were after, what's the point. "

That was my point exactly further up. I don't send first contact messages but if someone is messaging me I'd prefer if they actually read my profile.

The hoop jumping isn't about their preferences when someone sends me a message simply asking for my phone number, a face pic or to meet them the next day because the missus likes my pics.

I refuse all such requests and get told that it's my loss and do I not know who they are?

I could understand to some extent if I had messaged them with similar demands and they referred me to their preferences or tell me I wasn't what they were looking but there's nothing to understand when they make the first approach and expect me to jump.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach

I always make the ladies jump through hoops to meet me

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"Years ago I was chatting to someone, I make it clear any first meet is a social only

He was v grudging about it and said well since I have to jump through your hoops to meet you

I said don't bother if that's your attitude.

I don't think it's unfair for anyone on here to have their own preferences and want to meet people that they are attracted to and if others can't respect that or see it as having to jump through hoops, that's their issue.

I wouldn't message someone if I wasn't what they were after, what's the point.

That was my point exactly further up. I don't send first contact messages but if someone is messaging me I'd prefer if they actually read my profile.

The hoop jumping isn't about their preferences when someone sends me a message simply asking for my phone number, a face pic or to meet them the next day because the missus likes my pics.

I refuse all such requests and get told that it's my loss and do I not know who they are?

I could understand to some extent if I had messaged them with similar demands and they referred me to their preferences or tell me I wasn't what they were looking but there's nothing to understand when they make the first approach and expect me to jump."

Totally agree, it winds me up when people message me and request this and that and get all funny when you decline.

People can have what they choose on their profiles, but should respect others if they are making the initial contact.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I think that the term is often a case of expectations vs reality.

If a guy thinks that he’s going to pop a profile up, send out a few messages and be balls deep by lunchtime, then anything that prevents that is going to feel like an unreasonable demand.

These hoops are often reasonably justified after being on the site for a while or to match their preferences, so aren’t actually hoops for those they want to meet.

In my experience, it’s always those that are ruled out that complain about the unfairness of a preference and it’s only ‘demanding’ if it doesn’t include them

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"I think that the term is often a case of expectations vs reality.

If a guy thinks that he’s going to pop a profile up, send out a few messages and be balls deep by lunchtime, then anything that prevents that is going to feel like an unreasonable demand.

These hoops are often reasonably justified after being on the site for a while or to match their preferences, so aren’t actually hoops for those they want to meet.

In my experience, it’s always those that are ruled out that complain about the unfairness of a preference and it’s only ‘demanding’ if it doesn’t include them"

I've never felt ruled out or out of anyone's league but there's a degree of arrogance that comes with messages from couples who introduce themselves by telling me everything that's wrong with my profile and attach a list of things I need to do if I ever want to meet them.

I fully respect their preferences but I don't respect their stupidity and sense of entitlement and the fact they haven't shown me an ounce of respect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Virtually no one is meeting in our local area at the moment. They're either all off to clubs which are 50 miles away or waiting till lockdown ends.

My point is, it's all subjective and situational right now.

Even we as a couple feel like theres a lot of hoop jumping at the moment. Thers a lot of time wasters, picture hunters and wanna be's messaging us (and its not single men) then going radio silent the moment the word meet its mentioned.

Just have get on with it but right now fab is feeling like hard work rather than fun. It's all subjective and we all are having a different experiance but hopefully.it gets better soon."

This, we have had meets last year but this year even with people we have spoken to for weeks they do not confirm, we never give full address until the day as we are not spending hours getting all dressed up just for a night in front of the Telly. May as well save the effort until we can meet socially and go from there, then if they don't turn up we have a good night out anyway. Tasmin

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By *renzMan
over a year ago

Between Chichester and Havant

I've never jumped through hoops to meet someone. Previously when I was on here, I would read a profile and if I thought I matched their requirements and they mine, I would message them with no expectations. More often than not I would be responded to. Occasionally going on to meet for a social and more.

Now there seems fewer people that interest me, this time around. Probably less that I meet their criteria. If someone demanded I jump through hoops to meet them, I would rather not meet them. I'm sure there are plenty that will!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had so many message me and hound me for a reply yet the second we get messaging they ghost me after i've sent pics.. i'm thinking of naming and shaming said profiles.

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

I suppose we all have different ideas of what hoop jumping might mean.

But even the most demanding are not exactly the tasks of Hercules, for the most part you either fit the requirements or not. The other aspects seem to be attaching a face pic, or adding a keyword to the subject line.

I can usually manage that. Anyone seen anything more?

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