FabSwingers.com forum: Harder for men

By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

There are some dudes who prefer a pulse alongside a vageeeen. Not always compulsory tho. If they ain't alive they can't say no innit.

Tongue in cheek? Debatable.

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By *ryingitout19Man
over a year ago

Wales

It’s all about supply and demand. Women get bombarded with messages on here so naturally they want to filter who they get messages from.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get harder for men too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes the ratio of men to women or couples is too much. Sadly its judt how it is and because of that many women state they want the fittest hung men available and dont look for your average guy next door for fun.

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By *phrodite_AdonisCouple
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals.

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals."

My point is that say for example a bi couple they only want the best of the best men but then they'd take absolutely any woman, what's that about? Why don't they uphold their standards for the women as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's difficult for everyone on here, just the challenges are different

A percentage of ladies on here might be looking for those but also lots aren't ... just best to ignore those that you arent for and concentrate on those that you are!

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By *ublinGirl92Woman
over a year ago

Hell

Ah look. If it's harder for men here it isn't because of women having standards.

Look to the men who bombard women with copy paste messages or get abusive when told no.

The amount of times I've blocked all men from writing to me here because I just can't cope with the amount of bullshit I've been sent.

I know a lot of women who will overlook not being hung, tall, or made of muscles if the guy is halfway decent and able to hold an interesting conversation.

But it's very easy to say women are the problem so woe is me, right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are master of your own destiny.

Fab is as easy or as hard as you want to make it for yourself. Blaming others for your apparent lack of success is a cop out. So you don't meet someone's ideal?

Surely it is better to appeal to someone who likes you for you than appealing to just anyone?

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

It's definitely harder for guys to get converstions going on here that's more to do with the ratio on here tho than anything else

But the excuses that women look for the fittest most well hung best looking guys is just that an excuse for when someone is having no luck on here. And it is usually just an excuse also as I know most women I know do bit look for that on here. Obviously some will but not the majority.

You get out of fab what you put in quite often and I know before I answer anyone I look at their profile if their profile doesn't appeal or lacks any effort at all then I won't bother answering anymore luckily I don't get that many messages as I keep my filters tight .

Also your age may also go against you on here a lot of guys your age find it harder to get meets on here as you can be below quite a few people's preferences.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals.

Maybe they don't like their women well hung?

How do you know the women they decide to spend time with don't meet their standards, or they lack standards? Just because YOU don't find those women attractive doesn't mean the couple you're referring to feel the same.

Attraction is subjective and very personal, surely you realise that?

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Ah look. If it's harder for men here it isn't because of women having standards.

Look to the men who bombard women with copy paste messages or get abusive when told no.

The amount of times I've blocked all men from writing to me here because I just can't cope with the amount of bullshit I've been sent.

I know a lot of women who will overlook not being hung, tall, or made of muscles if the guy is halfway decent and able to hold an interesting conversation.

But it's very easy to say women are the problem so woe is me, right? "

Well you say that but putting things like must be hung and fit in your profile is probably going to turn away a lot of good guys because they aren't like that

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By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

I dont agree, by and large that's not what women are looking for. It's pretty easy for a man to stand out both profile wise and message wise.

Not saying you do OP, but some men if they put as much effort into their profiles as they do writing complaining messages on the forums, would be amazed at the results.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Ah look. If it's harder for men here it isn't because of women having standards.

Look to the men who bombard women with copy paste messages or get abusive when told no.

The amount of times I've blocked all men from writing to me here because I just can't cope with the amount of bullshit I've been sent.

I know a lot of women who will overlook not being hung, tall, or made of muscles if the guy is halfway decent and able to hold an interesting conversation.

But it's very easy to say women are the problem so woe is me, right?

Well you say that but putting things like must be hung and fit in your profile is probably going to turn away a lot of good guys because they aren't like that"

Well if it's in someone's profile that that's the kind of person they're looking for then so be it. You do realise you can have people that are hung, fit AND good guys at the same time.

If someone wants a 3ft tall yeti then so be it and if they aren't prepared to settle for less than that coz that's their desire who is anyone to judge?

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals.

Maybe they don't like their women well hung?

Attraction is subjective and very personal, surely you realise that? "

I never said I don't find those women attractive but my point is some of these people expect guys to look like Greek gods but then any woman will do to me that doesn't make sense

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Each guy is judged on his own merits, good profile with decent pictures and write up. Do they actually go to clubs and socials ? How often do they contribute to the forums, cam or chat rooms ?

If you’re doing non of the above, you’re merging into the background with those other thousands of guys who can’t be bothered either.

Women, couples and surprisingly TV/TS community do get to choose from a few messages a day. So either get involved in the community or sit on the sidelines and accept the fact, guys who do put in an effort deserve to get meets on this site.

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By *urious_Female89Woman
over a year ago

great yarmouth

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals.

I have to admit that this is a concern I have whilst using fab. I often question to myself are they actually interested in me(especially if its clear they haven't read my profile

) or is it a supply/demand thing and they'll just trying their luck..

I guess we all have our struggles here but in different ways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trouble is to many men on single profile are messiers and fake then thay spoil it for gen ones as we all get tared with same brush thanks all u time wasters and idiots

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Charming

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By *awandBareWoman
over a year ago

Oxford

"Ah look. If it's harder for men here it isn't because of women having standards.

Look to the men who bombard women with copy paste messages or get abusive when told no.

The amount of times I've blocked all men from writing to me here because I just can't cope with the amount of bullshit I've been sent.

I know a lot of women who will overlook not being hung, tall, or made of muscles if the guy is halfway decent and able to hold an interesting conversation.

But it's very easy to say women are the problem so woe is me, right? "

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Each guy is judged on his own merits, good profile with decent pictures and write up. Do they actually go to clubs and socials ? How often do they contribute to the forums, cam or chat rooms ?

If you’re doing non of the above, you’re merging into the background with those other thousands of guys who can’t be bothered either.

I do put effort into my messages j always read the profiles. I used to have a big bio and all the works but it got me the exact same results as I do now so

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires.

So... do you not think it's tough for both, just in varying ways?

Or maybe tough for anyone who's looking for anything more than a collision of genitals.

Maybe they don't like their women well hung?

Attraction is subjective and very personal, surely you realise that?

I never said I don't find those women attractive but my point is some of these people expect guys to look like Greek gods but then any woman will do to me that doesn't make sense "

You're right, it doesn't make sense to you

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I'm not arguing this anymore because you are making this out like I'm having a go at women and then just turning it into a personal attack on me

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Each guy is judged on his own merits, good profile with decent pictures and write up. Do they actually go to clubs and socials ? How often do they contribute to the forums, cam or chat rooms ?

If you’re doing non of the above, you’re merging into the background with those other thousands of guys who can’t be bothered either.

I do put effort into my messages j always read the profiles. I used to have a big bio and all the works but it got me the exact same results as I do now so "

So what's the common denominator there. You. Something you are doing is putting people off. Maybe it's your messaging style, maybe it's your type of pics you choose to share.

Fact is men outnumber women.

Fact is a lot of women aren't attracted to gym fit guys. You only need to read through the gym nod v dad bod threads to see that.

Fact is you're being incredibly rude to women by saying they only get laid because any hole is a goal for men.

Fact is you are being incredibly rude to men by saying they clearly have no standards.

Fact is you are doing yourself no favours with this thread.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I'm not arguing this anymore because you are making this out like I'm having a go at women and then just turning it into a personal attack on me"

Because you are lol you're saying they are wrong for having preferences. Then you're saying that all guys think any goal is a hole and that's why some women get laid easy on here because men have no standards.

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By *heltenhamBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I'm Bi, so get the best of both worlds....yes, it is a lot tougher to meet the ladies here, mainly due to the high ratio of guys to girls. Plus there are a lot of knobheads who treat women as though they are just here for their pleasure!

Time and effort is required, good manners and create a connection.

I have met ladies and couples from here, politeness counts for a lot, not just a "Wanna Fuck?" message.

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

Being on here...MRS4 Always points out to people is really no different for her going in to pub/bar and she isn't going to want to have sex with every male that might look her way or smile at her ?? the ones that stand out from the rest in how they dress etc etc ....how they approach her and she does object very strongly to the attitude that ..because she's dressed sexy she's asking/gagging for it ..same as on here ...but having so called standards or her bar set rather high brings with it...

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I wouldn’t reply to your profile.

Pics all hidden, no profile pic.... not much about you other than a fake online test thingy.

I only meet single men on here, and have met my fair share.

Be confident, a complete profile, a bit of effort goes a long way.

Put your violin away, don’t take every “no thanks” as personal and move onto the next.

If all else fails, get to the clubs!

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By *uriousblondwifeCouple
over a year ago

wickford

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all

Haha

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

"Each guy is judged on his own merits, good profile with decent pictures and write up. Do they actually go to clubs and socials ? How often do they contribute to the forums, cam or chat rooms ?

If you’re doing non of the above, you’re merging into the background with those other thousands of guys who can’t be bothered either.

I do put effort into my messages j always read the profiles. I used to have a big bio and all the works but it got me the exact same results as I do now so "

Apart from this thread, you have contributed to two other forum posts. Your pictures are for friends only, so anyone (like me) who’s looked at your profile now doesn’t know what you look like. You’ve joined during a pandemic when most people prefer to chat than meet, as we can’t meet currently. And how many socials or clubs have you been to ?

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I'm not arguing this anymore because you are making this out like I'm having a go at women and then just turning it into a personal attack on me

If you actually read everything you'll see the example I used was a bit couple so I don't see where you're getting that I'm saying men don't have standards. Also I'm not talking about me I was talking about the amount of profiles saying things like that in their bio

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Dont worry matey, all them pornstars will be back in the pubs from next week and so it will give the rest of us a chance

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

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By *renzMan
over a year ago

Between Chichester and Havant

Expectations!

Have none and you can't go wrong.

Yes, there are many more men and many of those will fuck anyone. Do you have a type? Do you prefer blondes or brunette? Would you fuck a 20 year old or would you prefer someone in their 50's? Choice and preference. Supply and demand.

When you message a well thought out message that's relevant to their profile, you may still be to large. Or to thin. Not tall enough. Too tall. Have a beard, not have one. Hairy chest, not have one. It could be that it's not you as such, but someone matches their requirements 100%. You might be 95% but you're not a 100%. If there's a few 100% out there, they would much prefer them. Just the way of the world.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that "

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I'm not arguing this anymore because you are making this out like I'm having a go at women and then just turning it into a personal attack on me

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all

From here lol in your original post!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well you say that but putting things like must be hung and fit in your profile is probably going to turn away a lot of good guys because they aren't like that"

The point of putting what you are looking for in your profile is to save people that don't match your type from wasting their own time and being disappointed when their message is deleted without reply.

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Also..... From here, which is the bit you told me to read

"My point is that say for example a bi couple they only want the best of the best men but then they'd take absolutely any woman, what's that about? Why don't they uphold their standards for the women as well"

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards "

How is it double standards if the woman they choose matches what they're looking for?

Just because someone likes gym fit men for example doesn't mean they automatically like gym fit women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is wise to choose carefully who to express an interest in having sex with.

You want nourishing not punishing

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

Okay.

We get quite a few messages (not loads, we're not models) from single guys. Well built, chubby, the three foot tall yeti someone mentioned earlier, the lot.

Makes no difference to us what you look like, unless of course there's Nazi tattoos or something daft.

What puts us off is (yawn, I know) not reading the profile, asking very personal questions off the bat, being pushy when politely declined and all the usual. Blank profiles, people who are not what we're looking for (straight guys - mostly) and one line messages will be ignored by us (and I'm sure most).

There are more guys on here than any other gender.

Your odds are going to be lower.

Many people have had hassle from single guys so are on their guard right from the get go.

That's not your fault. It IS frustrating.

The only advice I could give you is to tart up the profile, keep plugging away (nicely), get involved in the forums and chat and (when allowed) get out to some clubs.

Good luck.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards "

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

"On the flip side;

You say women are more "picky" shall we say?

Well, there's a ton of dross to trawl through to find individuals even remotely close to their desires..."

Like finding a sardine in a net of herring?

Or another metaphor...which isn't fishy.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman "

But any decent woman isn’t gonna go near a profile saying that so I don’t see how it’s relevant?

If a persons preference is a gym fit man that doesn’t mean they only have to like gym fit women? That’s not double standards.

Anyone who’s happy to “fuck anyone” on here most probably isn’t actually getting laid by anyone so I wouldn’t worry about them.

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman "

Ahh then I genuinely apologise. I misunderstood.

You're saying you're not happy that a fair proportion of women (and guys, couples et al) want beefcakes or black fellas or whatever. Being a skinny geeky white bloke I know just what you mean.

Isn't it momentarily frustrating?

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I was just saying how I don't understand why some profiles want a man chiseled from marble but then they're OK with any woman but now a few of yous have turnt it around into me being an incel that's angry because he can't get laid which isn't the case

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman "

5 years and I've never seen a profile like that. I need to open my eyes more.

What does it say? "Swamp donkeys with bad breath and green fanny flaps to the front of the queue"

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

"I was just saying how I don't understand why some profiles want a man chiseled from marble but then they're OK with any woman but now a few of yous have turnt it around into me being an incel that's angry because he can't get laid which isn't the case"

Not at all. I have seen the guys who basically want anything, just like a living fleshlight?

I'm no expert (not by a long way!!!) But I'm not sure that many people would feel valued enough by that to go ahead (hey - any of you that do, more power to ya who am I to judge) with meeting that person.

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman

5 years and I've never seen a profile like that. I need to open my eyes more.

What does it say? "Swamp donkeys with bad breath and green fanny flaps to the front of the queue"

Just a minute, rewriting the bio...

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman

5 years and I've never seen a profile like that. I need to open my eyes more.

What does it say? "Swamp donkeys with bad breath and green fanny flaps to the front of the queue"

Have you been reading my profile again?

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

Apologies, that’s not how it was intended to come across.

My points were aimed at your “it’s harder for

Men”.

I don’t know any couple or single guy on here that’s “happy for any women” or that has come across in such a way.... so shouldn’t have commented... enjoy!

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman

5 years and I've never seen a profile like that. I need to open my eyes more.

What does it say? "Swamp donkeys with bad breath and green fanny flaps to the front of the queue"

Have you been reading my profile again?

So that’s why you message me!!!!’

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By *aneyyMan
over a year ago

london

True it is a lot harder for men, but it’s our own doing. Here’s why... men send multiple messages to women and couples, some of which they wouldn’t even look twice at in the street. Giving them no choice but to filter people. Which is why you find 56 year old females demanding 6ft 6 greek gods with 9inch members.

It’s also why this site can have a lot of women with massively over inflated egos ect but it’s still a man thing.. if us lot didn’t just message anyone with a pulse and actually selected people we were genuinely interested in it would restore at least a little power back to us

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

"True it is a lot harder for men, but it’s our own doing. Here’s why... men send multiple messages to women and couples, some of which they wouldn’t even look twice at in the street. Giving them no choice but to filter people. Which is why you find 56 year old females demanding 6ft 6 greek gods with 9inch members.

Good Lord.

Well said.

(If you know of any Greek Gods by the way...)

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By *endydick.CumbersnatchMan
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

On any dating site, there's roughly 25 men for any woman listed. Around 1 in 25 women will have a reply or have interest in someone outside their already established group or interests. Odds on any dating, swinging or sex site are vastly weighted towards the woman having control and the pick of the men.

If you're playing the odds, a top-tier woman is going to have their pick of pretty much anyone on the site. If you're a mediocre woman, you're still going to have a lot of horny men to take the pick off becuase they are still out-numbered massively. Flip the genders, and top tier men (physically or personality wise) will have slightly better odds than the general man on here. If you're a mediocre man, then the odds are slipping to way down towards zero. I'm sure site admins will have a breakdown of male/female registrations.

If you're a gay man, then you're chances are pretty high with finding another gay or bi man.

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By *oneymitchMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

No lies were told here!

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By *ulgehunterMan
over a year ago

yorkshire

This site literally bursting at the seems with gay ,bi ,straight bi ,straight gay,I love it .Hard horny men every where

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

I remember setting up my first Tinder Profile, it was terrible no personality really showing and due to that I wasn’t getting many matches. I then did the thing I always advise and did some research, what pictures did women like on a dating app ? How do I come across better with the text I was using to sell myself better to those women ?

I took several photos wearing what was advised and changed the text to come across a bit more interesting. One suggestion was ask a question on your profile and it encourages a woman to send you the first message if you match.

If you’re outnumbered (and you are) you need to stand out above the rest. Look at what others do to improve their profile or visibility on the site. Then hopefully they’ll see you and not a blank generic profile.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

"I am not complaining about not being messaged back or any of that so I don't see how you all have turnt it around on me like that

Your moaning how much harder it is for men.... whilst there is more men I agree, there’s lots of things men can do to make it easier for themselves.

I turned it round on you because your the one moaning it’s too hard.

I was only trying to point out the double standards

There is no double standards. None of the men I’ve met on here are struggling to get laid?

It’s all about how you come across and that’s totally in the mans control.

Once again I'm not talking about my personal experiences of not getting a reply I'm just talking about the amount of profiles I see saying they only want fit hung men then say they want any woman

5 years and I've never seen a profile like that. I need to open my eyes more.

What does it say? "Swamp donkeys with bad breath and green fanny flaps to the front of the queue"

Have you been reading my profile again?

So that’s why you message me!!!!’ "

Just let me know if your green fanny flaps are no more and I’ll remove you from my hotlist

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

"This site literally bursting at the seems with gay ,bi ,straight bi ,straight gay,I love it .Hard horny men every where"

You also missed straight straight like me haha

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Oh if we had a penny for everytime?

I definitely wouldn't say I'm the sort of guy your referring to who apparently all women want. Yet I did nicely for some time on my single profile. So maybe its not all about huge cocks and solid chests. It's common knowledge its harder for guys than women if only by the numbers alone. But it seems to me your projecting some of your person blame onto the women of this women. Of course blaming the women maybe an easier to swallow narrative for you but it won't help you to get better results.

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By *aulaxd2020TV/TS
over a year ago

Dudley

"Each guy is judged on his own merits, good profile with decent pictures and write up. Do they actually go to clubs and socials ? How often do they contribute to the forums, cam or chat rooms ?

If you’re doing non of the above, you’re merging into the background with those other thousands of guys who can’t be bothered either.

"
totally agree I get loads of messages requesting meets but most of seem to want to meet “here and now” at the drop of an hat, most can’t grasp the fact that people like us take several hours to prepare and get ready and don’t live our lives in girl mode 24/7 so if we say no then the toys get thrown out of the pram and others think we are desperate and assume that not many people are messaging us. I know it’s a swingers site but some blokes on here need to take a long hard look at the way that they approach prospective meets remember..... First impressions counts and you can ruin your chances before you’ve even started x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

There's just lot's of competition mate.

It's not always about being gods gift either, intelligence and humour go a long way too.

Just be patient and spend more time thinking how you can best present yourself rather than trying to understand why it's so difficult for males to get a meet.

These couples and women you're referring to are meeting someone aren't they.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I don't ask for men to be hung, sexiest alive etc, but I do need to be attracted to anyone I'm gonna potentially meet yes.

Attraction is subjective, so I might not fancy someone who is considered hot.

With regards to men, it's hard for men yes due to the sheer numbers on here. However the ones that do the best here make an effort with their profiles and messages. My partner has a single profile here and has done well, because he speaks to women like people and is willing to chat and have a social first.

Op get known and use the forums in a positive way and when lockdown eases, try a club or organised social.

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By *lixir of lifeMan
over a year ago

knob Creek

Totally disagree..

I’ve been on and off here for 10 years and never found chatting and meeting difficult..

Maybe it’s your approach and the approach of the majority of guys ..

It’s as difficult as you make it ..

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By *lacksausageMan
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

No lies were told here!"

These days, I just stick to the forums.

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By *oner HornCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

As a man who uses this site on behalf of a genuine couple I'd observe that

A) there are some balance issues (more men than women or couples)

B) some people have particular stated preferences for physical characteristics...but many dont

C) some (but not all) men that contact us show signs of being one or all of:

sexually aggressive,

monosyllabic,

angry when ignored or politely asked to engage in a conversation

D)unable to understand that this is just one (relatively minor) part of our life..and no we're not playing right now unless we say we are.

So that does colour one's view a bit.. even though its not everyone that behaves that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To get noticed, you have to be unique. Personally I don’t think this site’s good for a guy’s mental health. Coming off soon anyway just to get back into gaming for a while. I think some of the forums are a bit of a joke with the same people interacting and any one not in the clique comments aren’t even responded to. If you aren’t into the club scene, it’s more difficult to meet people on here, near impossible. But looks are a major factor, I do agree with that.

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By *lacksausageMan
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

All jokes aside, a (straight) single guy is at the bottom of the pecking order: straight single fem, bi single fem, gay single fem, mf couplé, gay single Guy, tv/ts/CD, a few others I may have missed, and then straight Single guys.

Aside all the confusion and jokes, etc, it's a numbers game. Supply vrs demand. For every female profile on here, it seems there are 50 single guys. For the bi or gay guys, they have each other the keep afloat but the strictly straight guys, they have each other to compete with alongside the others(bi fem, Cpls, ts/TV, etc).

To meet a Cpl, a single guy has to beat all the competition, and be accepted by the man and the woman in the Cpl and sometimes, it's not that easy.

So, nothing person OP, methinks it's an open pool and we all have to swim for it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well of course looks are a major factor ?? i want sex with guys i at least and at the very least fancy from a visual point of view .. im not here to give guys i dont fancy a free ride ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"well of course looks are a major factor ?? i want sex with guys i at least and at the very least fancy from a visual point of view .. im not here to give guys i dont fancy a free ride ?? "

This

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire

Well my view is you get out of life what you put in. You definitely have to stand out from the crowd as a single guy, make some effort with your profile so it’s interesting, engage with people as people not just as a potential fuck and network. Then when you have done all that don’t expect immediate results. It takes time and effort on here. It took me two years before I got anywhere on fab. But now I’m flying so be patient guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh and its not a competition i dont sit here and play guys off against one another if someone catches my eye visually first then ill take it further but most dont make it after that as i can fancy some one but they turn out in the next couple messages to be dull as fuck

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By *lacksausageMan
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

"well of course looks are a major factor ?? i want sex with guys i at least and at the very least fancy from a visual point of view .. im not here to give guys i dont fancy a free ride ?? "

Guys, you've been told. Quit tripping!

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By *avessMan
over a year ago

London

The ratio of men to women/ couples is incredible which highlights this however.

People SHOULD be picky, because if you're sleeping with someone for "notches on a bedpost" or "any holes a goal" then you really need to consider your approach. Everyone here is human, with feelings and emotions and deserve to be treated with respect.

A lot of women are picky because they only want to have relations with people they find interesting and attractive, so make yourself interesting and attractive to them. Don't just throw a dick pic in and say "wanna fuck?". Am I picky because I don't want to sleep with guys which reduces my chances of a shag?

Also, the amount of abuse women get is disgusting, if being picky means you don't talk to someone who calls you a "fat slag" (or worse) for not responding then damn.

For me this site is about finding someone with mutual attraction and interest, if they don't find me attractive then how can we have a good time if we met up? I'd rather be ignored hundreds of times (which all us guys have had) and find 1 gem than have 50 people who you don't really find attractive or get on with. But hey, that's just me. Not every hole is a goal.

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By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham

"To get noticed, you have to be unique. Personally I don’t think this site’s good for a guy’s mental health. Coming off soon anyway just to get back into gaming for a while. I think some of the forums are a bit of a joke with the same people interacting and any one not in the clique comments aren’t even responded to. If you aren’t into the club scene, it’s more difficult to meet people on here, near impossible. But looks are a major factor, I do agree with that. "

Interesting comment... Makes me wonder, not specifically yourself, but if you're not "into the club scene" as you put it, why not? What puts you off?

In other words what don't you get from the club scene that you think is easier "in real life" as it were? Genuine question.

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By *ick and PamelarrCouple
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

A lot of men (but not all) either can't read or don't read what's written in a profile. We get contacted by single males who are straight a lot, you only have to read what's written!! As for good looking, well hung etc etc that's not the case at all with ourselves. The ability to read, write a half decent description (rather than 'wanna fuck' or 'can I get your wife pregnant' for example) and not come across as a desperate individual go a long way in our book.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Woe me woe me fab-life is so hard....yawn

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By *ick and PamelarrCouple
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

"As a man who uses this site on behalf of a genuine couple I'd observe that

A) there are some balance issues (more men than women or couples)

B) some people have particular stated preferences for physical characteristics...but many dont

C) some (but not all) men that contact us show signs of being one or all of:

sexually aggressive,

monosyllabic,

angry when ignored or politely asked to engage in a conversation

D)unable to understand that this is just one (relatively minor) part of our life..and no we're not playing right now unless we say we are.

So that does colour one's view a bit.. even though its not everyone that behaves that way."

Spot on!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

90 % at least of swinging couples dont go near clubs if they did every town would have one and be full the club scene is a small thing in the bigger picture and 20 years ago here in the sw if we wanted a club night we would travel to the midlands..

some clubs are not guy friendly and some guys are not for clubs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Has anyone noticed how many new, silhouette, sparsely populated profiles complain about how hard it is on Fab?

Each to their own and all entitled to set their own standards for who they meet.

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By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham

"90 % at least of swinging couples dont go near clubs if they did every town would have one and be full the club scene is a small thing in the bigger picture and 20 years ago here in the sw if we wanted a club night we would travel to the midlands..

some clubs are not guy friendly and some guys are not for clubs"

I'm the UK, and we've been to most of them, we reckon the clubs are as guy friendly as they reasonably be. In a couple of cases too friendly.

It's the "some guys are not for clubs" idea that's more interesting, why would they have more success outside of clubs if they struggle inside them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

also who i fancy is what i call sexy my thoughts of sexy guy are not what others think they are personal to me ...i stay well clear of plastic men and mirror huggers ...

so whats a hot guy ?? ask 300 women and get 300 different answers

whats seen as hung ?? again ask 300 women and get 300 answers

they only want the popular guys ?? really ?? i avoid those who put themselves out there that think there shit dont stink..

the im not hot guys ?? well how do you know if your not hot or not some of the guys ive seen moan on here i think well they are hot ?? so they must be doing something else wrong..

biggest dissapointment from guys who message me is down to one thing is laziness alot think if they cant remove your knickers in 3 words then thats it ... i remove my knickers for guys i fancy and have that personal mindset that i like then my knickers fall hands free

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont think its true that women are held to a lower looks standard than men. Lots of couples profiles state the specific type of women they're looking for some men also state they types of women they like. Even on forums men will start threads about women they hold in high regard.

Saying people will pick any woman is unfair. Women do get rejected on fab, women do get overlooked on fab. Maybe its not noticed because its not talked about or more men moan about how hard it is for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

some clubs are not guy friendly and some guys are not for clubs

I'm the UK, and we've been to most of them, we reckon the clubs are as guy friendly as they reasonably be. In a couple of cases too friendly.

It's the "some guys are not for clubs" idea that's more interesting, why would they have more success outside of clubs if they struggle inside them? "

because there are women who have fun with anyone just as there are men ..and theres nothing wrong with that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont think its true that women are held to a lower looks standard than men. Lots of couples profiles state the specific type of women they're looking for some men also state they types of women they like. Even on forums men will start threads about women they hold in high regard.

this is also very true rejection is healthy it shows that people have a say

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I love how the amount of people talking about different things and putting words in my mouth the whole point in the post has completely changed. It was never poor me im not getting picked it was that people would want amazing looking guys with massive cocks but then the SAME PEOPLE would say that they're attracted to any women

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

"I love how the amount of people talking about different things and putting words in my mouth the whole point in the post has completely changed. It was never poor me im not getting picked it was that people would want amazing looking guys with massive cocks but then the SAME PEOPLE would say that they're attracted to any women"

And that my friend is their prerogative

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I’ve never seen a couple profile that says that they want “any women”.

You’ve started a new thread asking how to improve your profile, so If you’ve took it personally that’s cos you’ve chosen too.

Anyone is allowed whatever standards they want.

I’ve literally never seen what your describing in my time here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

erm the first part of your question was about how much harder it is for men ?? then the next bit was men must be from women but men anything ??

maybe it if the question came across better then ??

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By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham

Are you just along about bi men then? Not following tbh

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

That's their perogative and I've never seen that on any profile anyhow. People can look for what they want on here if you don't agree well that's your issue not theirs.Just concentrate on those people who are what you are interested in and don't worry about what anyone else is looking for.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not "

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes the ratio of men to women or couples is too much. Sadly its judt how it is and because of that many women state they want the fittest hung men available and dont look for your average guy next door for fun. "

I'm your average guy next door . Good job I can talk my round it.. Lol

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

This is EXACTLY the vibe I’m picking up from it lol.

Basically if you’ll fuck any woman you should fuck any men because it’s harder for them....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

This is EXACTLY the vibe I’m picking up from it lol.

Basically if you’ll fuck any woman you should fuck any men because it’s harder for them....

Is that the same a sympathy fuck

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By *ackt815 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

This is EXACTLY the vibe I’m picking up from it lol.

Basically if you’ll fuck any woman you should fuck any men because it’s harder for them....

No my point Is why do people have such high standards for men but not for women

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

This is EXACTLY the vibe I’m picking up from it lol.

Basically if you’ll fuck any woman you should fuck any men because it’s harder for them....

No my point Is why do people have such high standards for men but not for women "

What you are judging as NOT a high standard, may be exactly their high standard, their perfect woman. Don't ya get it?

There's only you determining that these people are dropping their standards or lack any when it comes to women

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"I'm not arguing this anymore because you are making this out like I'm having a go at women and then just turning it into a personal attack on me"

Your age goes against you on Fab. Not everyone want a young guy. People want a profile to give them some information about what you like and what you’re looking for. Public pics also help make a profile attractive.

Not everyone wants tall, fit guys that are well endowed. Normally I’d suggest going to a club to meet people but until that’s an option chatting to people on here and joining in the forums is usually a good place to start. If you create a post you’ll need a thick skin to deal with the responses and expect people to disagree with you.

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By *reeneggsandsamMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

The truth of the matter is that most males are genetically programmed to spread their seed around a large group of women, and most women are genetically programmed to select the best male for their offspring.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it's probably more of a case of they put what kind of man they are looking for hoping it will reduce the amount of messages they get from men so they don't have to check 100's of messages and profiles constantly

But not so many state what kind of woman they are looking for because they aren't get tons of messages a day from women so much easier to read messages check out profiles and decided if they are interested from there

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

And that my friend is their prerogative

I never said its not

Then what exactly are you saying ? if they’re willing to lower their standards for a woman then they should for a man ?

This is EXACTLY the vibe I’m picking up from it lol.

Basically if you’ll fuck any woman you should fuck any men because it’s harder for them....

No my point Is why do people have such high standards for men but not for women

What you are judging as NOT a high standard, may be exactly their high standard, their perfect woman. Don't ya get it?

There's only you determining that these people are dropping their standards or lack any when it comes to women "

This is actually it lol.

Basically you only want hot men but will fuck ugly women and because of that we should all fuck ugly men too.

I don’t think he understands that standards and what’s attractive vary between people lol. And just cos he thinks the woman isn’t attractive their standards have dropped!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it harder for men? It’s surely easier for the good ones to stand out. You get out what you put in. This isn’t instashag. I never seemed to struggle as a single. It kind of depends how you treat and use the site. It’s just as hard if not harder as a couple. There are two people that need to find compatible friends. We certainly aren’t bothered by that though. It means the friends in the lifestyle we have are amazing and I imagine will be our friends for life.

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By *imandHer9396Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

Umm, we don't look for people in the "peek" of fitness. I prefer to chat with people of all sizes and shapes. I'm not attracted to men who are on the plus size, that's just me. Women who are on the plus size, I'm attracted to them. Again, my preferences. I've not been attracted to stick thin or athletic people either. It's the person I'm interested in

Equally, being "well hung" is not something we actively look for either. More interested in the person and the chemistry than someone's physical appearance.

Supply and demand is everything, and men outnumber the women/couples that way, yes. If you start a conversation that is obviously copied and pasted, not read our profile, or are just a knob head, we'll pass. Selling yourself as a person makes the difference for us, regardless of gender or physical appearance

Her x

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

It's even harder when you show no photos of yourself at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

I've neither fit, hung or sexiest man alive on mine

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

The way a guy treats a woman is a better indicator of how successful he is on Fab than what he looks like. Yes, some men are going to have looks that make it easier, but it's perfectly possible to be successful on here by treating women right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

+ those men that put on there profile that they have no preference or imply that they will fuck anyone by putting this on your profile indicates to other women that you have no preference at all so you think and hope that it makes you look like your just fun but in fact it comes across as very desperate and most women will run a mile .. its killing your profile before you even start .. same with i'll do anything its so zzzzz and means you have no imagination so again most will walk by

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apparently not being a knob head helps ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The way a guy treats a woman is a better indicator of how successful he is on Fab than what he looks like. Yes, some men are going to have looks that make it easier, but it's perfectly possible to be successful on here by treating women right. "

this is true but ive had guys treat me good online and when face to face they have no real social skills at all or can be total assholes so online is not really a good indicator ... socials can them out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i must say too this is not all men i have met many really nice and fun guys over the years ..i only use fab for guys so i love guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you see what you have just said i said a while back and was attacked for.

but it is true. men in general place a lot of women on a pedestals because they simp to them and will do anything thinking it lands them in bed.

women should be happy with the amount of attention they get etc but no. look how many are depressed and moaning like hell about men this and that.

Men are the worst enemy to themselves because when a women gets flaky or starts to make excuses, change dates to meet etc they give them another chance, still text them etc thinking they will change.

men its simple, cut them off! do not simp. you are the prize. you do not have to be the tallest bodybuilder sexist mofo ever to have walked the planet, but you need to put yourself first, love yourself before these women who would not be on here if they were a success in the real world and would not need fabs. they could walk into any club or bar and pull but they are a nightmare to live with and guys run.

The women i talk too, the ones who message me, i call these genuine because they know how to talk to a man respectfully not look down at them like they are lucky to have 5 minutes of their time.

The ladies who message me know how valuable my time is and so is theirs, they dont mess about they want to meet and thats why they are here. they understand its a two way street, they are women who want fun and enjoyment not to put up a few pics asking for fabs because they are feeling down.

This is the fault of men absolutely by not being brave enough to say No to a women and cut her off at the first sign of flaky behaviour.

Women hate my guts for standing up for myself and not accepting bad behaviour this doesnt mean im a bad person.

sure it may put many off me but that allows time to meet the right ones.

what it should tell you is that im for real and you only get one chance.

women only give guys one chance and you should play to their rules as well.

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By *lirty-CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Bexley

"Has anyone noticed how much harder it is for men on this site. I feel every profile is like for

men- must be fit, hung and the sexiest person alive thenFor women-absolutely anything we don't care how you look at all"

When there are 100 men to every female what do you expect? Seriously!

Go into a pub with 100 men and 1 woman and see how you get on taking her home.