FabSwingers.com forum: Taking one for the team

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Has anyone been in a club where you've got chatting to another cpl and one of you really fancies either m/f but the other is not that into them ?

Would you play with them to please your partner ?

Ps We've been there and there was no pressure to play but afterwards C had one of the best snags she'd had !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never. Neither of us would take a hit for the team. Nor would we ever expect or want the other to.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I'd never do it. Why would you, all parties should be happy

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By *peak and SpellCouple
over a year ago

Greenwich, SE LONDON

Have done... Regretted it later. Agreed that neither of us will do it again (though finding another couple where attraction is mutual is always challenging!)

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Nope, I'm half a couple and there's been lots of times Jack's liked the lady, but the male hasn't been for me.

That's why we meet alone now too.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Nooo, how insulting to the person you're reluctantly having sex with.

. I really hope I've never been the person someone is fucking just so their partner can have some fun

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By * AND R 777Couple
over a year ago

Teesside

No it was one of the first things we decided to never do and never have

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

If I had a partner, I would expect them to do something they didn't realy want to and if they expected me to do something I was not into, perhaps it wouldn't be such a good partnership.

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

Yes this has happen. We do not play unless all are attracted. We will not sell ourselves short, nor would we expect our playmates.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah he clearly didn't want to shag me so he spent the time watching his missus getting pounded and shouting encouragement at them.

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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

"Never. Neither of us would take a hit for the team. Nor would we ever expect or want the other to.

Yes I agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No never all parties must be in agreement

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By *rMrs84Couple
over a year ago

Doncaster

"I'd never do it. Why would you, all parties should be happy

"
here here. I’d be devastated if I ever found one of us had.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex liked to try pressure me into this.

I did once or twice, I was very new to swinging and usually in a club and "went with the flow"

Not anymore.

I never would again.

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By *kblokenorthMan
over a year ago

Any

In a Cap d’Agde club with my then buddy and I was approached by a gorgeous lady whom I super fancied. Buddy didn’t fancy her guy so we graciously declined (sob).

Was the right thing to do....

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By *lenn FairlightMan
over a year ago

East Kent

Had this situation crop up when playing previously as a couple. Finding the perfect balance is difficult, but it's so much better if everyone is enjoying it absolutely equally.

If one of you is not enjoying it to the point that they are taking one for the team, then it's a recipe for disaster.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

Not as a couple but yes, I’ve done it lol

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By *xfordshireCoupleMFCouple
over a year ago

Nr. Oxford

It’s one of our rules that neither will ‘take one for the team’.

If the connection isn’t there for all parties in a meet, then you run the risk of just going through the motions. Whilst that can be fun in itself, no great memories are made that way.

- John

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

To be fair, I’m the one the other person has to take one for the team with haha

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By *rumcouple2013Couple
over a year ago

Tamworth

No. Never have and never will. If we both don’t have a attraction to the other couple we don’t play.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope when I've gone as a couple.. its agreed we both or not at all..

No pressure on either of us. Its about being respectful

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By *histle do nicelyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow South

"Have done... Regretted it later. Agreed that neither of us will do it again (though finding another couple where attraction is mutual is always challenging!) "
same here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d chat to someone to avoid any awkwardness and leave anyone sitting alone but I’d never take one for the team

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

This is why it all went to crap with an ex, he was arranging meets with people I hadn't really seen, he found the woman attractive and didn't care if I did or the male, I went with the flow a couple of times and then said no more and left him to play alone while I went to bed.

It's an all or nothing with me I won't give or won't be a pity fuck so to speak

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope were either both in or both out!

Her x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t ever let you organs to the thinking if there’s no connection there’s no connection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah he clearly didn't want to shag me so he spent the time watching his missus getting pounded and shouting encouragement at them.

The guy was a selfish twat. You were better off not having sex with him. He obviously was more a cuck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is why it all went to crap with an ex, he was arranging meets with people I hadn't really seen, he found the woman attractive and didn't care if I did or the male, I went with the flow a couple of times and then said no more and left him to play alone while I went to bed.

It's an all or nothing with me I won't give or won't be a pity fuck so to speak"

Thats the way it should be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah he clearly didn't want to shag me so he spent the time watching his missus getting pounded and shouting encouragement at them.

The guy was a selfish twat. You were better off not having sex with him. He obviously was more a cuck. "

He could have been fucking a hole in the mattress and not noticed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah he clearly didn't want to shag me so he spent the time watching his missus getting pounded and shouting encouragement at them.

The guy was a selfish twat. You were better off not having sex with him. He obviously was more a cuck.

He could have been fucking a hole in the mattress and not noticed.

He sounds one selfish guy. His loss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We agreed when we joined that there was no taking one for the team. Its not about body perfection as we are not body perfect. its about a connection between us all to ebsure we will all be turned on enough to play and have fun whilst doing so.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I felt pressure because he was able to find something "fuckable" about almost everyone and I'm the total opposite. I found myself in a few situations I wanted to run away from.

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

It's something we've talked about buy the Jury's Out until we get onto that situation.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm straight, we both are, we make that clear to everyone we meet

Twice we've met couples and when it actually comes down to it all the guy wants is to watch his partner "in action" usually with another woman. Trust me there is very little that's more humiliating or depressing in a swinging situation than realising you're just there on sufferance and the guy will do anything to avoid even touching you.

I wouldn't do that to another person.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Has anyone been in a club where you've got chatting to another cpl and one of you really fancies either m/f but the other is not that into them ?

Would you play with them to please your partner ?

Ps We've been there and there was no pressure to play but afterwards C had one of the best snags she'd had !"

I'd take one for my team and let a stunning woman use me for sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always want the best for eachother but wouldn't "take one for the team" think its kinda disrespectful to the other people involved too. Dont really understand why people would compromise, if you aren't attracted to the person on some level.

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By *andSCouple
over a year ago

Old London Town

We’re so lucky as we both have similar tastes so it hasn’t come up yet.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"We always want the best for eachother but wouldn't "take one for the team" think its kinda disrespectful to the other people involved too. Dont really understand why people would compromise, if you aren't attracted to the person on some level."

I agree it's massively disrespectful.

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

100% never ever ....and just having sex so ...can't think of anything worse to be honest being treated like a piece of meat ?? or being viewed as a piece of meat ?? and about the only thing we refuse to talk about but due to the fact there is nothing to talk about and says just as much as about the person having sex with the person that taking one for the team and knowing they are only doing so to ...?? comes pretty close to ..

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I honestly don't get why it's even a discussion. Of course I'm aware of certain situations but in general normal swinging situation why would anybody even think "well I don't find him/her attractive but my partner fancies theirs so I'll bite the bullet" . Why would you consider doing that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Control can be a funny thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I felt pressure because he was able to find something "fuckable" about almost everyone and I'm the total opposite. I found myself in a few situations I wanted to run away from.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Control can be a funny thing. "

How do you mean Ivy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Control can be a funny thing.

How do you mean Ivy?"

When you said you dont understand why some would compromise.

Well, alot can be in abusive....or even coercive...relationships.

I have been, and also seen it before. One particular night in a club I was chatting to a couple and when the guy went to the toilet she told me she only swings because he would just leave her otherwise and they had been married a long time and she loved him and was desperate not to lose him.

I obviously then declined to give in to the guys advances after that.

It happens more than people think unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Control can be a funny thing.

How do you mean Ivy?

When you said you dont understand why some would compromise.

Well, alot can be in abusive....or even coercive...relationships.

I obviously then declined to give in to the guys advances after that.

It happens more than people think unfortunately."

Ah I see, yes unfortunately we have ended up in a situation where the one party wasnt nearly as interested as the other and it made for a thoroughly awkward encounter. Sorry to hear about your past experience and definitely something to be mindful of

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"I honestly don't get why it's even a discussion. Of course I'm aware of certain situations but in general normal swinging situation why would anybody even think "well I don't find him/her attractive but my partner fancies theirs so I'll bite the bullet" . Why would you consider doing that?

When you're being told you're too picky even in a jokey way, when you're trying to "prove" you're not, to prove you're open minded and not looking for excuses not to "have fun". When other people have accused you of trying to control your partner by obstructing meets and you know you're not, but are unsure how to prove it. When your partner talks of previous encounters and partners and how great they were, how open they were, when the situation and experience was what turned them on instead of the person they were fucking. When you're questioning in your own mind if swinging is for you, but you feel your relationship may hinge on being cool with it. Some people are great at applying the thumb screws without actually applying them.

It's only when you're out of a situation and you look back with a clear head that you can see the manipulation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep, quite a few times, unfortunately. Not easy to maintain an erection let alone be "hard". Thankfully a cock is not the be all and end all

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

Well are rule or rules...If mrs4 doesn't want to ..she won't ...Her body ...so her rules anyone who even tries any kind of mind games etc etc soon get told to..and can't have much respect for your partner if you put her/him in that situation and one of our big problem with this site now is the overwhelming numbers who regard it as a "Sex Site" and swinging is about far more than sex.....and not a day goes past where we are informed of the fact it's a "Sex site" ...sad days really as puts mrs4 off basically meeting people now as the assumption is she'll be having sex after chatting ..

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By *Xtriple7Couple
over a year ago

N Peterborough.

Been there and our advice is don't take one for the team.

We did it once, Mrs was all up for meeting, I wasn't feeling it at all. It turned out to be a very awkward meet, where I got the impression they wanted my Mrs all to themselves for an mff, felt like a spare part lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's only when you're out of a situation and you look back with a clear head that you can see the manipulation."

It's often very tiny inconspicuous things. That anyone else would think nothing of it, and even suggest you are being too sensitive and making something out of nothing. But it adds up to something else.

Very difficult to see when you are 'in it'. Obvious in retrospect.

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By *lixir of lifeMan
over a year ago

knob Creek

The problem with couples can be one ages better than the other, one is punching above their weight.. or especially on here I’ve noticed lots of couples with big age differences..

So to find another couple and everyone fancy eachother totally is going to be rare ..

Someone will be lowering their standards somewhere..

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

I only did it once in my early swinging days when I was still quite naive and unsure of myself. We were in a club and another couple approached us and I got swept up in the moment and felt like I had to. Now I'm more confident I don't do anything because I feel I should

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Control can be a funny thing.

How do you mean Ivy?

When you said you dont understand why some would compromise.

Well, alot can be in abusive....or even coercive...relationships.

I obviously then declined to give in to the guys advances after that.

It happens more than people think unfortunately."

I love jen to much to do that. Sje has the final say but we agreed that its only a social first then we talk about it alone. Then if we both like them and they like us we will then arrange a day for us all to meet up and play. If you respect your partner you should never force them to go with someone they dont fancy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Well are rule or rules...If mrs4 doesn't want to ..she won't ...Her body ...so her rules anyone who even tries any kind of mind games etc etc soon get told to..and can't have much respect for your partner if you put her/him in that situation and one of our big problem with this site now is the overwhelming numbers who regard it as a "Sex Site" and swinging is about far more than sex.....and not a day goes past where we are informed of the fact it's a "Sex site" ...sad days really as puts mrs4 off basically meeting people now as the assumption is she'll be having sex after chatting ..

Same here. Hate they refer to this site as a sex site. They are just after a fuck and nothing else. Swi nging is also social and making friends along the journey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The problem with couples can be one ages better than the other, one is punching above their weight.. or especially on here I’ve noticed lots of couples with big age differences..

So to find another couple and everyone fancy eachother totally is going to be rare ..

Someone will be lowering their standards somewhere.."

Wow so judgemental comment. Someone might think at some point you are punching above your weight.

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By *osweet69Couple
over a year ago

portsmouth

We have in our early days of playing

but not now. Hence why most of our social meets now to not lead on to play meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The problem with couples can be one ages better than the other, one is punching above their weight.. or especially on here I’ve noticed lots of couples with big age differences..

So to find another couple and everyone fancy eachother totally is going to be rare ..

Someone will be lowering their standards somewhere.."

Please leave common sense and your honest opinion out of this thread.....

You will be called judgemental for stating things you have seen with your own eyes.....

God speed

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