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Seriously any real people on here! Don’t people find it rude with no reply

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here

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By *ave1976XXXMan
over a year ago

newmarket


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

I feel your pain

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Have you got you phone number on your profile? I'm sure lots of women will tell you that you need to stand out from the thousands of other men on here.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine "
Singlw women get quite a few messages everyday as well.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No but I’m only an inbox away

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By *illy_the_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

hoorn, Netherlands

Just because people arent climbing the walls to jump on your cock doesn't mean theres lots of fake people about. It just means they're not interested in you......

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By *ave1976XXXMan
over a year ago

newmarket


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine "

A not my type/no is better than nothing

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By *irtySekretsCouple
over a year ago

Filthy Desires Upon Trent

A no reply usually means not interested.

Just live with it and move on x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

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By *ave1976XXXMan
over a year ago

newmarket

A simple no thanks takes no effort to write.

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By *illy_the_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

hoorn, Netherlands


"A simple no thanks takes no effort to write."

You realise that some people get over a hundred messages a day, not to mention that even when you do that a lot of those men will then either reply trying to convince you, or throw abuse your way, not responding is a much easier method

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But why should they ?

Last time I looked we all have a choice and some people choose not to respond

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By *arol321Woman
over a year ago

Poole

If someone messages and they have a face and body pic either in their message or in their profile as requested in my profile then they always get a reply even it’s a polite no thanks. If they just message with no pictures then I delete.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Replying just a) opens up the channel of comms for the future and b) risks the torrent of abuse when you politely say no. We started off replying to everyone but rapidly changed tactics and stopped. The abuse simply isn't worth it.

One minute you're God's gift to them, next you're a fat, disabled old trollop that no-one wants to touch and your husband is a freak for shagging a disabled "bird". Not worth it, eh?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I quite often don’t reply, and I’m no fake.

Women get hundreds of messages on here.

I’m on here for my benefit and to have fun, not to spend all my time responding to messages, then responding to the reply/abuse.

Do you reply to every leaflet you get thru your letterbox?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't give up.. I had one night ofpeople just being total dicks! The next night I found some lovely people. There are some lovely people here. You have to get lucky sometimes I guess..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only reply to those who bothered to read my profile.

Those who don't is instantly deleted.. minority are abusive.

Plus when I text no.. Its like table tennis.. But "why." . Then gets abusive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you open spam email and reply?

People are busy and you are one of the many messages women get everyday. You cannot send a uninvited message and be upset with no reply.

Move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get used to it most of people dont reply it's how things are...I dont take personal women have thousands of messages daily so it's fair they don't reply

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By *rs-sensual-meWoman
over a year ago

gwynedd

Just because you don't hey a reply doesn't mean people are fake.

If its obvious in their message that they havnt read my bio then I won't reply either.

I used to reply but the abuse we get back to a polite no thankyou is vile and isn't worth the risk.

If you give the site faqs a read it does state that a no reply or deleted message is a no.

Yes it maybe frustrating and seem rude that people don't reply but doing that 80+ times a day to different people and getting getting 50 abuse messages back just really isn't worth the time effort or upset. So now the site faqs are the best option for most.

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By *ot - CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

This is from the facts page.

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess you'd have to receive the messages couples and single ladies get to fully understand their perspective.

We often try to be polite, and sometimes wish we hadn't bothered.

Some see this as fishing, if they receive a reply, they think they've got a bite, no matter the reply.

They'll begin trying to change our mind or trying to converse more, even after we mentioned we're not looking to get into conversation with more as we're struggling to keep up.

Think of it this way ........

Each time you walk by ac Street seller, be that charity or gas and electric, do you feel obliged to stop and talk with them because they approached you?

You're not obliged and neither are people here.

Put the effort into your profile, a selection of a few pictures, read their profile and message them appropriately/accordingly, relate to what they seek.

Good luck

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By *rs-sensual-meWoman
over a year ago

gwynedd


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine "

I just wanted to add that no we aren't all here for the same thing. Some just read forums. Some stay for the group socials. Some to stay in touch with friends.

Their bios will usually state this but just don't assume everyone is here for rhe same thing. Good luck

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By *UNISHR23Man
over a year ago

heathrow


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine "
lmao there not fake accounts atall. There’s ablut 100/1 ration men to women on here, women get pick of the bunch. Takes time get some verifications build it up

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By *aughtycp1Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"A simple no thanks takes no effort to write.

You realise that some people get over a hundred messages a day, not to mention that even when you do that a lot of those men will then either reply trying to convince you, or throw abuse your way, not responding is a much easier method"

EXACTLY this !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that there's a lot of fake people on here too m8.but there's a lot of nice people too. You should hang in there and im sure that you will get replies shortly. Good luck

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

This gets posted so often and so many times women try to politely say why they don’t or can’t reply to all but still men get funny.

I give up trying to explain now. Men might see this as being rude or that I’m fake but I am neither. I had some bloke call me rude and block me today because I had to bulk delete the messages I couldn’t get through, I even apologised on a status before I did it, but that’s not good enough

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

The fact that this topic keeps coming up with monotonous regularity should be evidence enough that many people haven't read the site advice or any previous advice given in similar threads.

It baffles me how popular women and couples can be expected to reply to anything more than a few messages each day unless they have someone (like a benevolent employer) else's time at their disposal!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

You forgot humble and oh so modest op and with an entitled complex attitude!!!

Best of luck op.

T

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

What exactly did you expect?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

Please keep the replies to the thread on here, OP. Many thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

Basically, No reply Is a reply, it's a No.

Not everyone is comfortable to tell people No, so they ignore.

We also have a life away from here and so don't want to waste precious time stating No thank you so many times, when we're here for the Yes pleases.

Be sure to put effort into your profile and messages, a few choice pictures too.

Basically, kinda match the profiles that grab your attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

Say I get on average 20/30 messages a day time I've answered all of them thanks but no thanks nearly all the men with reply so now I have got another 50/60 of messages. Now if I put on a new photo that number of messages can easily go up to 100/150 (last I over 500) how am I supposed to respond to all those messages.

Xx

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

I'm thinking of copying and pasting that, maybe with capital XXs to emphasise my sincerity, should I start down the road of replying to replies to rejected replies.

Oh the irony of 'I get that'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The op has been on here three months, so doesn't really know any better.

Just go with the flow op and you'll find what you're looking for.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yeah I get that, but for people who are new to this is like a knock back! I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but what’s wrong with people being polite, it really does go a long way x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx

Please keep the replies to the thread on here, OP. Many thanks "

Something you could easily have privately messaged him back instead of baiting him out.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

OP. In some responses to comments already said, you have tended to answer your own original query.

The bottom line is there are hundreds of guys all seeking the same goal. In pre-pandemic times, it was difficult enough, but it's even tougher nowadays.

If you look in the Forum Index, or check on Moderators responses or advice on this topic, it's generally regarded that No Reply equates to someone NOT being interested.

Some Ladies or even Couples have been known to receive 200 messages a day to their profiles, or new Pics appearing. That makes answering all messages a chore.

Or put it this way; if you happened to get 200+ messages in one day, would you reply to each and every one? Add in those who don't accept the word "NO" & repeat message again and again! It happens! See what I mean? Where would you draw the line?

Being on FAB, being a newcomer as you are, means having a thick skin and accepting no replies means No! This isn't an Instant Meet Site, but instead, you must have bags of Patience and Perseverance to get you through.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

Ok so say a woman starts to reply to 20 messages, just to say no thanks, in that time she starts to talk to 2 she likes and wants to keep replying. For every 5 minutes she’s online replying she’s getting another 5 messages from other people expecting a reply as well as the two she’s interested in. Not only that she’s then got the ones she’s said no thanks to trying to start up a conversation. Or giving her abuse. By the end of the day she may have over 80’she hasn’t been able to reply to, do you understand now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah I get that, but for people who are new to this is like a knock back! I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but what’s wrong with people being polite, it really does go a long way x "

If you use the reply + quote button it helps your thread move smoothly.

Alas not knowing the sites rules and how it basically works is on you and no one else.

No reply = no thank you so no it’s not rude and no one is entitled to anything on here just like IRL.

T

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah I get that, but for people who are new to this is like a knock back! I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but what’s wrong with people being polite, it really does go a long way x "

Have a read on the replies here and you may understand.

And there's your first lesson, many won't n reply because they are too busy trying to make their fantasies happen, rather than spend time politely saying no, to many people.

It's the way it is, it's not personal.

Trouble is, too often a polite No is seen as an invite to converse.

Put in the right effort and it may well happen.

Nobody is or should be obliged to do anything here, we're all adults and can decide for ourselves

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

It’s not negative advice it’s just the truth.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok but surely as human beings we could do the decent thing! And girls I can’t imagine how many messages you get per day! And people don’t help themselves but there is genuine man out there like men

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley


"

Ok so say a woman starts to reply to 20 messages, just to say no thanks, in that time she starts to talk to 2 she likes and wants to keep replying. For every 5 minutes she’s online replying she’s getting another 5 messages from other people expecting a reply as well as the two she’s interested in. Not only that she’s then got the ones she’s said no thanks to trying to start up a conversation. Or giving her abuse. By the end of the day she may have over 80’she hasn’t been able to reply to, do you understand now? "

The Fab equivalent of the 'R' number!

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By *irtySekretsCouple
over a year ago

Filthy Desires Upon Trent

Get over it. This isn’t Instashag.

No one owes you anything.

Join the queue.

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By *he RingmasterMan
over a year ago

Canford Cliffs


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

"Babe"?

And there is your answer.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

We've offered positive advice.

Put in the effort in your profile and pictures.

Read the profiles of those that interest you, message them with regards to their wishes.

Many will see the lack of effort in a profile and/or message as a Negative.

Nobody is obliged to reply for the sake of politeness.

Like you, they're here for fun, and so will look for the fun they seek, not spendb their day sending polite No's.

I think you may understand if you had their experiences

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok but surely as human beings we could do the decent thing! And girls I can’t imagine how many messages you get per day! And people don’t help themselves but there is genuine man out there like men "

The decent thing is to accept a No reply as a No.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

Eh? Do you apply that lack of reasoning to everything in life, quite apart from on here?

It's a case that the Old School Swingers as you so eloquently wish to define us, are actually giving you some clear and simple advice, by telling you exactly how it is!

It's not going to change because you want it to suit you. Have you looked at the site rules and advice pages on the Forums, suggesting suitable advice and tips?

Learn from them, and use our comments constructively. It does work, but a lot of success on here comes down simply to how much effort you put in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

They arent they are trying to educated you.

Fab inbox is a very different beast for couples and especially single women to your inbox.

Would you have time to go 1 by 1 to answer 100-500 messages every single day??

People have lives do you think women and couples can dedicate literally hours every single night replying to all the messages from guys that day that they have zero interest in?

God forbid the don't log in for a few days due to life and come back to a 1000 messages sat ready.

I saw a single female get 200 messages in just 1 hour when she put up a new picture.

The only way they could do what you want is to hire a part time secretary to work 10-20 hours a week answering messages which are essentially unsolicited junk mail that they never asked for.

When you take all the above into account surely just surely you now realise how insane your request is??

KJ

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

Old or new most of us are in the same boat more or less. I think people see so many of these type of posts they get jaded by it. what might help is a sticky FAQ at the top of the forums or some sort of auto reply rule option on messages, like you can set up in outlook. It's not a 100% perfect but at least it'll give some people the response the yearn for, even if it is an automated one.

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery


"

Ok so say a woman starts to reply to 20 messages, just to say no thanks, in that time she starts to talk to 2 she likes and wants to keep replying. For every 5 minutes she’s online replying she’s getting another 5 messages from other people expecting a reply as well as the two she’s interested in. Not only that she’s then got the ones she’s said no thanks to trying to start up a conversation. Or giving her abuse. By the end of the day she may have over 80’she hasn’t been able to reply to, do you understand now?

The Fab equivalent of the 'R' number!"

Haha well put yes and I was being quite conservative with those numbers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated "

I’ve posted twice on your thread and you have not posted a reply to my posts so do you think that makes you fake or in-genuine

I going to say that no you don’t.

T.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated "

We haven't forgotten you are new on here, as newcomers appear every day. Where we can, we offer tips and advice to assist anyone finding it difficult to navigate their way around, but help yourself too, by checking the Forum pages Index for similar advice, and read the site rules which can be informative too.

But for those of us who have been here for a few years and know the score, don't throw us under the bus. We know how things are. Good luck.

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By *rs-sensual-meWoman
over a year ago

gwynedd


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "

people are being supportive by telling you how things work round here.

All of this is on the site faqs that you could read for yourself. Or even do a forum search to see how many people say this and its always the same replies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near

Because most single guys don't take thanks but no thanks easily, so 8ts less hassle just to ignore message

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By *igT-Time-4-FunMan
over a year ago

BEDFORDSHIRE areas SOCIAL or fun let's chat


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

-------

O.P

I am gonna be honest as I think that's best way.

----

No male even the largest COCK and BRAD PITT look alike gets lots of replies.

-----

I'm not good looking/big cocked but get a few replies and have had fun.

---------

The 2 most importants things are imho.

1.The message you send.

2.Your bottom profile message they can read.

--------

Phone No on account is not liked by most ladies.

Looks like your begging for sex.

--------

And your bottom message is confusing, i think it reads like you don't wish to meet anyone.

-------

Be imaginative-Funny-Inventive on both the above and hopefully things MAY??? improve.

------

Good luck boss

T.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no chance in hell im replying to all the messages i get ... the rules are simple no reply means no thanks not only that but a reply either gets another reply of why not or oh go on or fuck off you ugly bitch ...

plus op if your new to this you'll soon find out you need thick skin in this scene as a male ... and rejection is a massive part of swinging ..the on top of that the ratio of women/couples to men is at a guess 50 to 1 in fact it could be alot higher than that...

lastly but most important nobody owes you anything ..

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

My best friend gets about a 1,000 messages a day, it would be a full time job replying to each and every message!!! You aren’t the only single guy on here messaging them lol

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By *tu30ssMan
over a year ago

blackpool

Ok, there is a simple solution to the problem.

There should be a button where if you are not interested with the person called "not interested".

Which then the website sends an automated message telling the person not interested maybe with a reason and maybe show results that who on the website might be interested.

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By *odgerMan
over a year ago

Coventry(ish)London


"

Do you reply to every leaflet you get thru your letterbox?

"

A very good analogy if I may say so

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By *lenforfunMan
over a year ago

Wakefield/gilberdyke/brough/howden/Beverly e.yorks

I tend to agree

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By *lenforfunMan
over a year ago

Wakefield/gilberdyke/brough/howden/Beverly e.yorks


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine

A not my type/no is better than nothing "

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"no chance in hell im replying to all the messages i get ... the rules are simple no reply means no thanks not only that but a reply either gets another reply of why not or oh go on or fuck off you ugly bitch ...

plus op if your new to this you'll soon find out you need thick skin in this scene as a male ... and rejection is a massive part of swinging ..the on top of that the ratio of women/couples to men is at a guess 50 to 1 in fact it could be alot higher than that...

lastly but most important nobody owes you anything .."

Well said, I had to hide my single profile for this very reason.

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By *odgerMan
over a year ago

Coventry(ish)London


"Ok, there is a simple solution to the problem.

There should be a button where if you are not interested with the person called "not interested".

Which then the website sends an automated message telling the person not interested maybe with a reason and maybe show results that who on the website might be interested.

"

An even simpler solution is to have to do nothing. I don't reply with a polite 'no thanks' when I get 'wuu2 sexy bum' messages from guys. I ignore and then if they try again I block. All v simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why should anyone reply to someone who feels entitled to a reply?

What is respectful about doubting the authenticity of others?

Never get a reply?

Really? Rude not to reply??

Perhaps it's not them,it's you that needs to address some issues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also, often the reply is already in their profile.

So often we have guys messaging that are a good ten years or more out of our age range, just as one example.

If they took the time to read, that wouldn't be waiting on a polite No kind of reply.

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By *olden RatioWoman
over a year ago

Buckinghamshire

It's been said before but no reply = not interested... it really is as simple as that.

I would point out that you haven't responded to every comment on this thread, though.

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

We get a lot of messages from single guys when it says we’re not interested in meeting single guys. We don’t reply to them as they haven’t bothered to read our profile.

Just because you message someone doesn’t mean they have to respond. Trying to put a response under “common decency” is a bit weak as well.

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By *reeneggsandsamMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

Get over it pal!

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth


"Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated "

I think peoples comments have been constructive and helpful, it must be clear now why you are not getting replies, numbers, abuse etc. It takes time and effort to stand out, a humorous observant comment say based on someone's post on a thread etc. Dont get frustrated or upset..that will get you nowhere. Most of all , if you want to chat to people go to one of the organised socials held around the country, ( there is info in the forums,...when things allow ) by far the easiest way to get your first verification and engage with people .

Cheers

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By *hiterosesCouple
over a year ago

Stafford

Must be the true definition of irony......new sgl m profile, 3 months old with no verifications....calling people like us with 179 different ones over last 12 years fake......

What are the chances that anyone who did reply would get similar accusations?

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

Out of interest op, assuming - like us - you get regular spam phone calls do you always answer them with a polite, "no thank you".

Most people don't, and it's just the same on here - live with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine

A not my type/no is better than nothing

I agree"

Try reading all the replies on this thread, and see if you have a different opinion then.

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By *ap d agde coupleCouple
over a year ago

Broadstairs

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 08:56:33]

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

If some women had to reply to every message they receive it would take hours, fuck that if rather leave than do that.

I think it's common decency for people to read a profile and maybe consider not messaging in the first place if it is clear that you are not what the profile is looking for.

Yet still women get hundreds of messages from people that clearly have not read their profile or just don't care what it says. Isn't that rude?

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By *all me FlikWoman
over a year ago

Galaxy Far Far Away


"A simple no thanks takes no effort to write."

True but I wouldn't say no thanks without reading their profile first. So let's say a couple of minutes to read a profile and respond accordingly multiplied by the 432 messages that I received yesterday alone that's 7 hours 12 minutes work....I have other things to do with my life.

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By *eventysixCouple
over a year ago

glossop

We always respond with no thanks if we are not interested. mainly when the male messenger messages completely ignoring the fact we are a couple. Desperation comes in all forms

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By *nked_kittenWoman
over a year ago

Ankh Morpork

I rarely even read my messages let alone reply. I just don’t have the time or inclination to reply to people I’m not interested in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly, with the abuse I've received in the past for politely declining someone's advances, it feels safer to ignore.

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By *attM73Man
over a year ago

Oldham

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 09:24:30]

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated "

To be honest. It has been explained may tines through this thread why people don't reply, but you keep insisting that they should. If this is your attitude on here, then you will probably NEVER get anywhere on here. You come across as selfish and entitled.

Many ladies literally get hundreds of messages a day on here, and responding to each of them would take hours.

You MUST be aware that none if these ladies has asked you to message them, so your message is just unsolicited spam to most.

The majority of women will look at your profile before even opening your message, if they're not enticed by your profile then no message will sway them.

If you want success on here, your profile is the most important thing. If there is nothing there to make you stand out from the crowd, you WILL be overlooked.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I answer all my messages but clearly state on my profile that I might not respond ... luckily though never really get rude messages nor rude replies! But if you've clearly not read my profile, why would you expect me to reply? Respect is very much a two-way street surely?

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine agreed unless you’re in a couple or you’re bi-curious!, no ladies on here want to know single genuine guys at all??. And like you op, a reply is manners!. "

.... but we're not all here for the same thing. Some are here looking casual sex with a midget in a santa outfit, others are looking to be gangbanged by the French rugby squad. Others are looking to be used as a toilet, where as someone else just wants to swap pictures of their favourite sheep....

There us mist certainly not a "same thing" that we are all here for.

Cal

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By *ain and sortedMan
over a year ago

Old Harlow Essex

We all can't be for everyone and if the ladies and couples are inundated or indeed looking for something specific, you have to understand its impossible for them to reply, if I send a message and no reply I accept that as a no thanks same with a no thank reply I leave it at that. I've had a couples profile on here it's bewildering how many messages you get and end up bulk deleting and starting again when looking. Sometimes it's best to accept its not rudeness it's just timing

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I really regret the no thanks messages I sent in my early days as now those people can always get around any filters I set and I end up having to block them sometimes.

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By *all me FlikWoman
over a year ago

Galaxy Far Far Away

Ok...thought I would test the theory. One incoming message chosen at random this morning...polite no thanks...this has become 22 messages with currently 21 responses from me....do I continue responding when I have absolutely no interest?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just because people arent climbing the walls to jump on your cock doesn't mean theres lots of fake people about. It just means they're not interested in you......"

Cruel. But fair. I think if someone enters into an exchange with you, then maybe politeness says it should get a 'close-off' if they then decide that they're not interested. Up to then, no-one should 'expect' anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I first joined Fab, I replied to every message I was sent, as I am a nice person & feel that if someone had taken the time to write to me, I would write them back, even if it was to politely decline their requests.

Over time, I realised that

1) I quite frankly didn't have the time or the inclination to reply to the hundreds of messages I got on a weekly bases.

2) When I did respond with a no thank you, very often I would keep getting messages from the same guys trying to either pursuade me to meet them.

For example... "you don't know what you are missing" pleas.

Or even those very same guys who originally messaged me saying how gorgeous my figure was etc. Then getting very nasty & verbally abusing me saying things like...

" Well I wouldn't meet you anyway as you are (.........) insert abuse here!

So unfortunately I choose to not respond most times these days if I am not interested in someone, as it's just easier.

Doesn't mean I am rude or a bad person, it just means I have checked out your profile & don't want to meet you for any one of a hundred reasons!

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice

Eh? Do you apply that lack of reasoning to everything in life, quite apart from on here?

It's a case that the Old School Swingers as you so eloquently wish to define us, are actually giving you some clear and simple advice, by telling you exactly how it is!

It's not going to change because you want it to suit you. Have you looked at the site rules and advice pages on the Forums, suggesting suitable advice and tips?

Learn from them, and use our comments constructively. It does work, but a lot of success on here comes down simply to how much effort you put in.

"

You seem very sensible, and it obviously works well for you, maybe you should write a book

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women do get a lot of stick for not replying to messages , it's not right. Their inbox gets flooded , keep in mind that there are more men on the site.

Participate In the forums and chat, I find it easier building friendships that way rather than going straight to the inbox.

No reply or a deleted message shouldn't be looked as being rude. No one is entitled to a reply.

It's the same as if someone says no to giving you their number, no matter how nice you've been.

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la


"Ok ladies I’m not here for a roasting, think you guys have forgot that I am new to all this, and feedback is very much appreciated

To be honest. It has been explained may tines through this thread why people don't reply, but you keep insisting that they should. If this is your attitude on here, then you will probably NEVER get anywhere on here. You come across as selfish and entitled.

Many ladies literally get hundreds of messages a day on here, and responding to each of them would take hours.

You MUST be aware that none if these ladies has asked you to message them, so your message is just unsolicited spam to most.

The majority of women will look at your profile before even opening your message, if they're not enticed by your profile then no message will sway them.

If you want success on here, your profile is the most important thing. If there is nothing there to make you stand out from the crowd, you WILL be overlooked.

Cal"

Good advice here. Sadly very few men seem to grasp the importance of their profile bio, but they also rarely read profiles before messaging & then complain when they don't get a reply.

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By *tu30ssMan
over a year ago

blackpool


"It's been said before but no reply = not interested... it really is as simple as that.

I would point out that you haven't responded to every comment on this thread, though."

Sorry I don't sit on the website all day.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I refuse to put more effort into a “no thanks” message, then they did with their “hey” opener.

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By *tu30ssMan
over a year ago

blackpool


"Ok, there is a simple solution to the problem.

There should be a button where if you are not interested with the person called "not interested".

Which then the website sends an automated message telling the person not interested maybe with a reason and maybe show results that who on the website might be interested.

An even simpler solution is to have to do nothing. I don't reply with a polite 'no thanks' when I get 'wuu2 sexy bum' messages from guys. I ignore and then if they try again I block. All v simple."

Another simple solution from fake website or profiles.email the web admins, tell them so they can investigate it then block the profile.

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

We don't mean to be rude. But we don't respond to people who have not read what we are looking for in our profile. Sadly it happens a lot! There is no point in wasting time.

We equally don't respond to blank profiles with no pictures and little info.

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By *nked_kittenWoman
over a year ago

Ankh Morpork


"Ok, there is a simple solution to the problem.

There should be a button where if you are not interested with the person called "not interested".

Which then the website sends an automated message telling the person not interested maybe with a reason and maybe show results that who on the website might be interested.

An even simpler solution is to have to do nothing. I don't reply with a polite 'no thanks' when I get 'wuu2 sexy bum' messages from guys. I ignore and then if they try again I block. All v simple.

Another simple solution from fake website or profiles.email the web admins, tell them so they can investigate it then block the profile."

That takes time. Easier to just ignore. And it doesn’t mean they are fake just because they send a one word message

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Replying just a) opens up the channel of comms for the future and b) risks the torrent of abuse when you politely say no. We started off replying to everyone but rapidly changed tactics and stopped. The abuse simply isn't worth it.

One minute you're God's gift to them, next you're a fat, disabled old trollop that no-one wants to touch and your husband is a freak for shagging a disabled "bird". Not worth it, eh?"

Yup.

The site FAQ says delete without reply means no thank you.

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By * AND R 777Couple
over a year ago

Teesside


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x"

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there "

The explanations on here are clear, too. "Common decency" doesn't work on here, unfortunately. Most of us have tried it.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

Do you reply to every unsolicited letter you get through the mail, or every email advertisement you receive? Thought not, but it doesn't make you fake, just that you're not interested in what's on offer. You aren't entitled to an answer to your advertisement either (as Fab guidelines tell you).

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here

----

Do you reply to every unsolicited letter you get through the mail, or every email advertisement you receive? Thought not, but it doesn't make you fake, just that you're not interested in what's on offer. You aren't entitled to an answer to your advertisement either (as Fab guidelines tell you)."

I am considering writing a nicely crafted letter to the sender of each item that comes through my letterbox from now on, it seems rude to just leave them hanging.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

You may just be unlucky that the person/s you message may get lots of messages so very time consuming having to say no thanks to all and sundry.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 10:37:43]

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By *wingsnroundabouts82Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville


"I guess you'd have to receive the messages couples and single ladies get to fully understand their perspective.

We often try to be polite, and sometimes wish we hadn't bothered.

Some see this as fishing, if they receive a reply, they think they've got a bite, no matter the reply.

They'll begin trying to change our mind or trying to converse more, even after we mentioned we're not looking to get into conversation with more as we're struggling to keep up.

Think of it this way ........

Each time you walk by ac Street seller, be that charity or gas and electric, do you feel obliged to stop and talk with them because they approached you?

You're not obliged and neither are people here.

Put the effort into your profile, a selection of a few pictures, read their profile and message them appropriately/accordingly, relate to what they seek.

Good luck"

Exactly this! Couldn't have put it better!!!

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester


"A no reply usually means not interested.

Just live with it and move on x"

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

Fab forums really are the gift that keeps giving.

Do you genuinely believe that all the women you message are fake because you don't get a reply ?

Just remember that you've not joined easyslutsrus.com so I suggest that you lower your expectations and up your game massively.

And even then you still need patience, so get along to clubs and socials when they kick back in.

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By *lorious hole bs16Man
over a year ago

Bristol

I am not especially bothered by no reply to a message, quite useful really, clearly not interested so block and move on.

What I do find rude is when people

arrange to meet and then just stop messaging and fail to show up.

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By *irtylittletramp100TV/TS
over a year ago

Notts


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

your not that easy going as i cant even message you, so perhaps you arent as open as you think you are and others spot that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think guys moaning on here looks very good...

I just keep trying...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"
if you read their profiles you should know they are not your type we get many messages a day replying often involves a torrent of abuse yes we do reply to some but only if we can see they have at least made some attempt at reading profile

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By * AND R 777Couple
over a year ago

Teesside


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there

The explanations on here are clear, too. "Common decency" doesn't work on here, unfortunately. Most of us have tried it."

Yes that's why the rules say, no anser means no interest

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice "
This is being supportive, just because it is not the advice you want to hear.

Do you open your messages with 'Babe', I would change that for a start.

When clubs open up and socials start again, go to them.

Accept that women do not have to message you back, they owe us nothing.

opening a forum post to complain about it will not get you any pity or encourage women to reply back.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there

The explanations on here are clear, too. "Common decency" doesn't work on here, unfortunately. Most of us have tried it.

Yes that's why the rules say, no anser means no interest "

Indeed.

Like many women with common decency, I found out the hard way why, and adapted. Ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think fab should have a zoom meeting once a month with the newbies(I know 7 months) and explain all the dos and donts and what means what....lol

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By * AND R 777Couple
over a year ago

Teesside


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there

The explanations on here are clear, too. "Common decency" doesn't work on here, unfortunately. Most of us have tried it.

Yes that's why the rules say, no anser means no interest

Indeed.

Like many women with common decency, I found out the hard way why, and adapted. Ha"

Yes lost count of the amount of abuse or even begging we have had for just saying "sorry but it's a no thanks"

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By *ffanotdykeCouple
over a year ago

Telford

Having read most of the replies to the OP and his subsequent comments. We just get the impression he feels entitled.

No one is entitled to anything other than respect. Understand that and he would feel a lot more at ease.

G&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one is obligated to answer any message from anyone. In our experience a lot of guys ask 'Why' even after a polite no thanks. So it's just easier to not reply most of the time.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

I would add that anybody interested in you might also want to see if you are consistant in your posts and to check for any red flags so they will follow the green arror.

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By * AND R 777Couple
over a year ago

Teesside


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

So yesterday we had 60 messages, if we ancer them all half will message back asking why\your lose or give abuse, do you then expect us too reply to that 30 messages, and so on, we would then have no time to chat with the people we do want to talk to

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By *ustyshowoffCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

We get messages from lots of single guys that clearly haven’t read our profile, why should we reply?

Mark

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By *andSCouple
over a year ago

Old London Town


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

To be honest we never expect a reply. When people do it’s nice. It says that someone is interested in us. That is a win for us.

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By *wazuluMan
over a year ago

edinburgh


"I quite often don’t reply, and I’m no fake.

Women get hundreds of messages on here.

I’m on here for my benefit and to have fun, not to spend all my time responding to messages, then responding to the reply/abuse.

Do you reply to every leaflet you get thru your letterbox?

"

Life is like that...it ain't fair... Just because I see an add on TV doesn't mean I'm going to buy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A no reply usually means not interested.

Just live with it and move on x"

Well said

That’s the way it is on fab

Just accept it folks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why should anyone reply to someone who feels entitled to a reply?

What is respectful about doubting the authenticity of others?

Never get a reply?

Really? Rude not to reply??

Perhaps it's not them,it's you that needs to address some issues

"

Yes

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x

Have you read the fab rules, it's all quite clear on there

The explanations on here are clear, too. "Common decency" doesn't work on here, unfortunately. Most of us have tried it.

Yes that's why the rules say, no anser means no interest

Indeed.

Like many women with common decency, I found out the hard way why, and adapted. Ha

Yes lost count of the amount of abuse or even begging we have had for just saying "sorry but it's a no thanks" "

I landed in hospital shortly after joining (injury). That was hell on wheels, trying to be polite

I was very fake, rude, and unimaginative for not meeting them and using the possibilities that my incapacitation allowed me

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By *ueenieHWoman
over a year ago

leeds

You obviously never seen how many messages women get , so we ain't going to spend all day saying we ain't interested to every single man we aren't interested in, we have other stuff to do

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By *arte_Blanche_NECouple
over a year ago

Northern


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? Even if not interested a reply is great and know it’s genuine "

No we actually aren’t all on here for the same thing, every single person and couple have their own desires which don’t necessarily match yours. Nobody actually owes you a reply, if we don’t get a reply from a message we simply take that as a no and move on. Because someone isn’t interested doesn’t make them fake.

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By *odgerNbadgerCouple
over a year ago

Chepstow

This is why we nearly always open communications with a wink. If someone's interested they wink back. If they don't then no harm, no foul and we move on. Bodger is good at shutting people (mostly single guys) down but even so we often get "but why not?"

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 12:11:09]

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

What everybody on here should do is message OP directly and ask him why he hasn’t replied to our forums posts.

After all, it doesn’t take much effort and is respectful.......unless it’s a fake account of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont click his green arrow

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton


"Dont click his green arrow "

You know I’m now going to click it don’t you?

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By *tuYorksMan
over a year ago

Barnsley

Not receiving a reply is neither a judgement of you or the recipient of your message. Most couples & females are inundated with messages. You shouldn't take it personally.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"What everybody on here should do is message OP directly and ask him why he hasn’t replied to our forums posts.

After all, it doesn’t take much effort and is respectful.......unless it’s a fake account of course "

It's alright, we got a message last night which stated we (not sure which one of us) are not his type. Unsolicited, of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Ok so say a woman starts to reply to 20 messages, just to say no thanks, in that time she starts to talk to 2 she likes and wants to keep replying. For every 5 minutes she’s online replying she’s getting another 5 messages from other people expecting a reply as well as the two she’s interested in. Not only that she’s then got the ones she’s said no thanks to trying to start up a conversation. Or giving her abuse. By the end of the day she may have over 80’she hasn’t been able to reply to, do you understand now?

The Fab equivalent of the 'R' number!

Haha well put yes and I was being quite conservative with those numbers "

This is so true... sometimes you just don’t have the time to answer everyone xxx

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton


"What everybody on here should do is message OP directly and ask him why he hasn’t replied to our forums posts.

After all, it doesn’t take much effort and is respectful.......unless it’s a fake account of course

It's alright, we got a message last night which stated we (not sure which one of us) are not his type. Unsolicited, of course "

I didn’t get a reply! Maybe I should report him for being disrespectful? Even though I’m straight, it’s the principle

WE DEMAND ANSWERS

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By *ustAPeakWoman
over a year ago

bd11


"I get that I know the ratio of men to women is a lot but common decency would be nice x"

The amount big emails I receive without any public pictures is astounding. To reply to everyone would practically be a full time job. If someone makes an effort with a message I will at some point respond however the number of one liners is terrible.

There is also an entitlement that women should respond, for me this is a massive turnoff. Sorry I am not greatfull for a guys urequested attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

has he stopped replying yet?

he's not doing himself any favours,

no matter how many times he is told he still insists.

the exact reason why people do not reply to a lot of messages.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with.

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By *ueenieHWoman
over a year ago

leeds


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Everyone has the right to choose who they sleep with , just because people like you don't think women should be allowed to have that choice when infact without us women you would be using your hands. Women are allowed to say no thats our right , just like you men have the right to pick who you want to sleep with. Your comment is disgusting and if you don't have sexual chemistry then the sex would be shit

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

That's an odd way of measuring success or if someone is genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

op seems a bit arrogant in believing that we should answer all messages if we did we wouldnt have time to chat with the real people

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with."

Funtimes comment only reinforce the "myth" that most men will shag anything with a pulse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 12:47:33]

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Wrong....

We are not all here simply to find someone to shag. Sorry but I need a genuine connection with someone whom I am going to spend time with and get to know.

Why would you meet someone who you weren't attracted to and have sex with them? This say more about you then any 1000 word profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Not my type yada yada is just someone expressing a preference,might be too short, too old or young etc.

Just get over it and move on,it's nothing personal.

And no reply means not interested, it's not rude to not respond.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

my God, does this person actually believe in what he has just wrote

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 12:44:17]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with.

Funtimes comment only reinforce the "myth" that most men will shag anything with a pulse

And every time that "myth" comes up it chips away a little more at the shaky self confidence of those of us who already think it."

Find those who like you as you are - and don't regard the rest

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By *abriellajackCouple
over a year ago

Newport


"I get that babe, but trying to be a genuine man on here seems harder than I ever expected , I get you ladies are inundated with messages, but surely as respectful humans a reply explaining that your not there type is almost as good as a reply that’s genuine xx"

We get anywhere between 20 and 100 messages a day depending on whether we have uploaded pics etc. About 98% of them clearly haven't bothered to read our profile so why should we have the 'decency', as you put it, to dedicate over an hour of our day replying to people who haven't spent the same amount of time reading the profile?

Anyone who clearly has gets a response regardless of whether we are interested.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Yeah I get that, but for people who are new to this is like a knock back! I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but what’s wrong with people being polite, it really does go a long way x "

You know what's rude?

Joining a group and not reading the etiquette/rules etc.

You don't seem to be understanding that no reply means no interest, that comes from the site itself.

Many women, off the back of threads just like this one, or because when they joined they felt obliged to respond with a polite no thanks discovered all they were doing was opening themselves up for a fuckton of abuse.

I'd also like to open your eyes and mind that actually no, we most certainly are not all here for the same thing.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Well, having looked at your profile (because I always read them), I am going to contradict your theory. I can tell by your profile that in fact we are not after the same thing. I have never met anyone purely based on looks, personality matter to me far more. Your theory that men seem to manage to organise meets better than women is also contradicted by the many posts from men complaining that they can't get meets.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Jesus wept.

You know a vagina has a human attached to it?

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

[Removed by poster at 02/04/21 12:56:58]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with.

Funtimes comment only reinforce the "myth" that most men will shag anything with a pulse "

Yep. Urgh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I replied to everyone who messaged me on here FAB would be a full time (or at least part time) admin job!

I'm not turning this site into an unreasonable amount of work for myself just so people who choose to message me can be satisfied that I'm 'not rude'

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By *ustBustyWoman
over a year ago

SE Kent


"Just because you don't hey a reply doesn't mean people are fake.

If its obvious in their message that they havnt read my bio then I won't reply either.

I used to reply but the abuse we get back to a polite no thankyou is vile and isn't worth the risk.

If you give the site faqs a read it does state that a no reply or deleted message is a no.

Yes it maybe frustrating and seem rude that people don't reply but doing that 80+ times a day to different people and getting getting 50 abuse messages back just really isn't worth the time effort or upset. So now the site faqs are the best option for most.

"

Exactly this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

Jesus wept.

You know a vagina has a human attached to it? "

Please click his green arrow...your thank me for it

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with.

Funtimes comment only reinforce the "myth" that most men will shag anything with a pulse

Yep. Urgh "

It really shows to me that there's a canyon between the mentality.

There are those who want an experience, a meet that leaves you with a glow and a new mate, something to reminisce upon and raises a smile, something you look back on hopefully with fondness.

And those who think "dick, fanny, balls empty, job done"

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"I’m here as a new comer! So all of the so called old school swingers that are throwing out advice should be more supportive of the new comers instead of giving out negative advice

Eh? Do you apply that lack of reasoning to everything in life, quite apart from on here?

It's a case that the Old School Swingers as you so eloquently wish to define us, are actually giving you some clear and simple advice, by telling you exactly how it is!

It's not going to change because you want it to suit you. Have you looked at the site rules and advice pages on the Forums, suggesting suitable advice and tips?

Learn from them, and use our comments constructively. It does work, but a lot of success on here comes down simply to how much effort you put in.

You seem very sensible, and it obviously works well for you, maybe you should write a book "

Thank you for your response. I do try and it can work for me, just as it does for the genuine single guys who do take their time to read profiles fully, do react accordingly but can accept that rejection on here is part and parcel of FAB life!

I've made my share of errors over the years, but learnt from them.

But I don't go around thinking that the ladies on here should be automatically reacting to my approach, such as the OP appears to consider should happen.

Amazingly, as someone else has commented, the OP has been very quiet & hasn't been replying.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Yeah I get that, but for people who are new to this is like a knock back! I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but what’s wrong with people being polite, it really does go a long way x

You know what's rude?

Joining a group and not reading the etiquette/rules etc.

You don't seem to be understanding that no reply means no interest, that comes from the site itself.

Many women, off the back of threads just like this one, or because when they joined they felt obliged to respond with a polite no thanks discovered all they were doing was opening themselves up for a fuckton of abuse.

I'd also like to open your eyes and mind that actually no, we most certainly are not all here for the same thing."

Yup. Read the room, etc.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow


"We’re all on here for the same thing right?? "

I think that assumption might be your first mistake!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take it as a polite ‘thanks but no thanks’, especially if the message gets deleted too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Ok so say a woman starts to reply to 20 messages, just to say no thanks, in that time she starts to talk to 2 she likes and wants to keep replying. For every 5 minutes she’s online replying she’s getting another 5 messages from other people expecting a reply as well as the two she’s interested in. Not only that she’s then got the ones she’s said no thanks to trying to start up a conversation. Or giving her abuse. By the end of the day she may have over 80’she hasn’t been able to reply to, do you understand now?

The Fab equivalent of the 'R' number!"

Up to about 1,000 now

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"A simple no thanks takes no effort to write."

I have 339 messages in my inbox (I clear it weekly) if you say no thanks it usually leads to ‘why not’ which then results in another message or ignore.

To spend say 30 seconds on say 100 messages a day means 50 mins a day just to say no thanks once. I don’t have that kind of time nor do I want to spend my fab time replying to people who think I owe them ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m a well mannered man clean respectful and very easy going and a very good personality but never get a reply way to many fake people on here "

Don't mix not getting a reply with fake profiles. Very separate things.

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP "

Holy fuck ... any hole’s a goal right there. Totally turn off.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has the op disappeared?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP is very correct. Lots of timewasters on here but men seem to manage to organise meets better than women. We are all after the same thing so all this crap about not my type yada yada is pure rubbish. If soneone is genuine then that matters more for me than looks and women seem to base it all on looks and a 1000 word profile that they never read anyway. I have met girls in the past on a old profile who were not the best looking but they were genuine and didnt waste time so would take that over some up her arse beauty queen anyday. Well said OP

So are you saying that as long as they'll meet it doesn't matter what they're like? Because a lot of women don't work like that, they like to be attracted to the person they're having sex with.

Funtimes comment only reinforce the "myth" that most men will shag anything with a pulse

Yep. Urgh

It really shows to me that there's a canyon between the mentality.

There are those who want an experience, a meet that leaves you with a glow and a new mate, something to reminisce upon and raises a smile, something you look back on hopefully with fondness.

And those who think "dick, fanny, balls empty, job done" "

Again, yep and urgh!

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