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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " If someone not interested in swinging chances are they won’t change their mind. Is he the jealous type. | |||
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"My advice would be to start all over together as a couple. Begin by fantasising in bed together. Then build from there. Discover his sexual side together. He is bound to have deep sexual fantasies that he has probably suppressed for years. Now he has met an open minded woman they can be slowly brought out together as a couple. Don't worry about the destination of swinging or getting a physical meet. Just enjoy the journey and see where it leads x" Best advice!!!  | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! " This! But that’s fab for ya! | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! This! But that’s fab for ya! " people always complaining that women get better grace on fab.. but hey I'm not complaining  | |||
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"Tbh he might even turn his head when you show him your profile ask him his opinion on it. And tell him this is where your kinky side comes out see what he says. He might just like it. " The kinky side isn't the issue... it's sharing with other men that is  | |||
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"You can't say or do anything to change his mind. If he doesn't want to, he doesn't want to. How does he feel about you being a swinger? " not really into it... but I'm not going to penalise him for not wanting to be a swinger. He had threesomes with random people, just not in a loving relationship. Too jealous and possessive | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! This! But that’s fab for ya! people always complaining that women get better grace on fab.. but hey I'm not complaining "There is truth in it though. I was just reading about a lady maybe exposing herself to a delivery guy and everyone is “go for it”. On the flip side, I read about a guy wanting to do this to his post lady and he was absolutely pulled apart for it! It’s all about equality until it’s not | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! This! But that’s fab for ya! people always complaining that women get better grace on fab.. but hey I'm not complaining
There is truth in it though. I was just reading about a lady maybe exposing herself to a delivery guy and everyone is “go for it”. On the flip side, I read about a guy wanting to do this to his post lady and he was absolutely pulled apart for it!
It’s all about equality until it’s not "Not everyone displays the same double standards. Often men will support someone trying to persuade a reluctant partner. I agree about the flashing thing, it's often seen as ok for a woman but a lot of people do call all genders out on it. | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " hi all i can add when i first met j I was more vanilla than ice cream lol.on the first night she told me that she goes to clubs and so on.im like okkk but i like her so she suggested going to one club to see what it's all about .if i didn't like it she would stop .i went along and i loved it im not a full swinger .so we are happy for j to play with women or have same room fun with the 2 women playing and us men play with our own partners. But thats not to say it wont change in the future  | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Can we discuss this tonight when I get home | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Get another girl to join you both he’ll soon warm to the idea | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " If he doesn't want to swing and your thinking he's the one then I'd say delete your profile and enjoy each other. | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Dont say anything you both have pasts that has no business with the other one. I disagree on you wanting to change his mind though. | |||
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"You can't say or do anything to change his mind. If he doesn't want to, he doesn't want to. How does he feel about you being a swinger? not really into it... but I'm not going to penalise him for not wanting to be a swinger. He had threesomes with random people, just not in a loving relationship. Too jealous and possessive " Who've just answered your own question....too jealous and possessive.... | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Would you be happy with a monogamous relationship? If not then you will never be compatible. | |||
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"And if he says he's not interested then you can't and shouldn't want to change his mind. Respect his boundaries and make your choice based on that. " Perfect reply and second that. Swinging is for some people and not for others. | |||
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"You can't say or do anything to change his mind. If he doesn't want to, he doesn't want to. How does he feel about you being a swinger? not really into it... but I'm not going to penalise him for not wanting to be a swinger. He had threesomes with random people, just not in a loving relationship. Too jealous and possessive " Have you discussed that you are a swinger? Saying he is too jealous and possessive makes me wonder how he would react if he does know? If he knows your background and you have to work late, would he then question your whereabouts, being jealous and possessive? But in answer to your original question. You should leave. I can't see you changing his mind, certainly not in the short term. | |||
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"this is a conversation you need to have between yourselves not here in the forum. Be open and honest with him about what you would like but be prepared for answers to questions you may not like. Depends what you mean by leave, would he be happy for you to stay on the site if it was just to chat in the forum ect but no longer meet others? Could you do that and give up meeting other people. Would you be happy if the shoe was on the other foot? " oh course i understand that... just wanted to hear from swingers experiences... not such a crime to ask for that? | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Tie him up like a good little slut(him) and let him watch you get walloped, see what the response is, | |||
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"this is a conversation you need to have between yourselves not here in the forum. Be open and honest with him about what you would like but be prepared for answers to questions you may not like. Depends what you mean by leave, would he be happy for you to stay on the site if it was just to chat in the forum ect but no longer meet others? Could you do that and give up meeting other people. Would you be happy if the shoe was on the other foot? oh course i understand that... just wanted to hear from swingers experiences... not such a crime to ask for that? "Never said it was a crime merely stated you need to have the conversation with him as it's his thoughts that should concern you more than ours if that makes sense ? As to swingers experiences if they are here as a couple the conversation obviously went well lol if they are still here as a single Pringle then not so well I guess and or cheeting | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! " So true | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " You shouldn’t want to change his mind. Ask the question, explain your side. Make a decision. Simple. If he doesn’t want too, you shouldn’t want to change his mind. Why get into a relationship with someone you already want to change It’s not always about being open minded. I wouldn’t do this as a couple but here i am single. | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Yes. No. Maybe. It’s yours and his choice.  | |||
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"You can't say or do anything to change his mind. If he doesn't want to, he doesn't want to. How does he feel about you being a swinger? not really into it... but I'm not going to penalise him for not wanting to be a swinger. He had threesomes with random people, just not in a loving relationship. Too jealous and possessive " Too jealous and possessive 
That would set my alarm bells ringing immediately regardless of whether I wanted to stay swinging or not. Can't deal with people like that... | |||
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"Long as your happy that’s all that matters*, there is a world outside of fab. Enjoy it x " | |||
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"A quick look at your profile OP, reveals you are erotic by nature, that’s part of who you are, that’s why you came here in the first place, so it follows that a “soul mate” needs to have a similar mind set. You may have fallen for this chap, but over time, if your sex life with him isn’t satisfying your inner needs, the initial feelings would turn to frustration. It’s important to be open with him from the get go, I don’t mean you have to go into the finer details about your past adventures, but I’d sit down with him and explain you enjoy exploring your sexuality and that could involve including other people. I assume you would have no problem watching him with another woman? Tell him that, but also try to explain the difference between sex with a person you have feelings for and sex with a person you don’t , are poles apart, that’s the bit most non swingers just can’t get their head around. He may surprise you with his reaction, it may be something he’s thought about and is willing to try, if that’s the case, ease him in gently. If his reaction is discust or anger, I’m sorry to say (my opinion only) he’s not the one for you." why does it have to be threesome with a woman? I want MMF | |||
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thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day | |||
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"tbf I think most vanilla people don't like sharing their partners and I think fabbers see it as being jealous or possessive but in vanilla world, it's perfectly acceptable to think that way. I don't see it as a deal breaker or red flag and rather choose someone I'm really compactible over having more than one cock thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day"Think it you yourself that said he was possessive and jealous in an earlier post and that you wanted to change him. Question is is he really that comparable if you already want to change him? Not saying you shouldn't be with this gentleman but wonder if he really is the Mr right for you. I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world and hope it works out for you. | |||
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"tbf I think most vanilla people don't like sharing their partners and I think fabbers see it as being jealous or possessive but in vanilla world, it's perfectly acceptable to think that way. I don't see it as a deal breaker or red flag and rather choose someone I'm really compactible over having more than one cock thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day"It's perfectly fine for people to not want to share a partner. It's not for everyone. But you're the one that described him as jelous and possessive. Maybe a poor choice of words, but guys like that are the type to be generally controlling. Especially as he knows you've been on here how would that jelousy and possessiveness manifest in your relationship? Will he see you chatting to a male friend and assume you're shagging him? Will he look at the way you dress and want you to dress down so other guys don't look at you? If you argue is he going you bring up your past as a swinger to try and make you feel bad? Slippery slope. But you know him better than we do so it's you're choice. If you're really into him there must be a reason... | |||
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"A quick look at your profile OP, reveals you are erotic by nature, that’s part of who you are, that’s why you came here in the first place, so it follows that a “soul mate” needs to have a similar mind set. You may have fallen for this chap, but over time, if your sex life with him isn’t satisfying your inner needs, the initial feelings would turn to frustration. It’s important to be open with him from the get go, I don’t mean you have to go into the finer details about your past adventures, but I’d sit down with him and explain you enjoy exploring your sexuality and that could involve including other people. I assume you would have no problem watching him with another woman? Tell him that, but also try to explain the difference between sex with a person you have feelings for and sex with a person you don’t , are poles apart, that’s the bit most non swingers just can’t get their head around. He may surprise you with his reaction, it may be something he’s thought about and is willing to try, if that’s the case, ease him in gently. If his reaction is discust or anger, I’m sorry to say (my opinion only) he’s not the one for you." | |||
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"tbf I think most vanilla people don't like sharing their partners and I think fabbers see it as being jealous or possessive but in vanilla world, it's perfectly acceptable to think that way. I don't see it as a deal breaker or red flag and rather choose someone I'm really compactible over having more than one cock thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day
It's perfectly fine for people to not want to share a partner. It's not for everyone.
But you're the one that described him as jelous and possessive.
Maybe a poor choice of words, but guys like that are the type to be generally controlling. Especially as he knows you've been on here how would that jelousy and possessiveness manifest in your relationship?
Will he see you chatting to a male friend and assume you're shagging him?
Will he look at the way you dress and want you to dress down so other guys don't look at you?
If you argue is he going you bring up your past as a swinger to try and make you feel bad?
Slippery slope.
But you know him better than we do so it's you're choice. If you're really into him there must be a reason..."nooo he's not like that.. yes probably poor choice of words but no idea how else to use. I was curious to see if couples started off monogamous then moved on to being a swinger? | |||
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"tbf I think most vanilla people don't like sharing their partners and I think fabbers see it as being jealous or possessive but in vanilla world, it's perfectly acceptable to think that way. I don't see it as a deal breaker or red flag and rather choose someone I'm really compactible over having more than one cock thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day
Think it you yourself that said he was possessive and jealous in an earlier post and that you wanted to change him. Question is is he really that comparable if you already want to change him?
Not saying you shouldn't be with this gentleman but wonder if he really is the Mr right for you. I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world and hope it works out for you."ok poor choice of words. He just not into swinging and I wondered if any couples here experienced the same thing, how did their partner change their mind of swinging? He not jealous or possessive, he's open minded and kinky. Just not into swinging in a loving relationship. I should of said it like that to begin with | |||
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"My advice would be to start all over together as a couple. Begin by fantasising in bed together. Then build from there. Discover his sexual side together. He is bound to have deep sexual fantasies that he has probably suppressed for years. Now he has met an open minded woman they can be slowly brought out together as a couple. Don't worry about the destination of swinging or getting a physical meet. Just enjoy the journey and see where it leads x" Definitely this. | |||
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"tbf I think most vanilla people don't like sharing their partners and I think fabbers see it as being jealous or possessive but in vanilla world, it's perfectly acceptable to think that way. I don't see it as a deal breaker or red flag and rather choose someone I'm really compactible over having more than one cock thanks for all the input and helping me figure it out.. I choose love over sex any day
Think it you yourself that said he was possessive and jealous in an earlier post and that you wanted to change him. Question is is he really that comparable if you already want to change him?
Not saying you shouldn't be with this gentleman but wonder if he really is the Mr right for you. I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world and hope it works out for you.
ok poor choice of words. He just not into swinging and I wondered if any couples here experienced the same thing, how did their partner change their mind of swinging? He not jealous or possessive, he's open minded and kinky. Just not into swinging in a loving relationship. I should of said it like that to begin with "If you need/want to change his mind then in my opinion he is not the right one for you. But as you said earlier...you'd choose love over sex so it really isn't an issue. | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? " Cya, enjoy what yr heart and head are telling u.. hope it works and if it don’t, then see u in yr return | |||
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"Not a dig at the op at all.... But this is classic fab double standards. If a guy posts about wanting to change their partners mind about swinging he gets torn a new one in 5 seconds flat! " It's a very good point lol | |||
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"I fallen for someone but he's not a swinger. Not sure if he ever be so might have to leave fab... what can I say or do to change his mind? Tie him up like a good little slut(him) and let him watch you get walloped, see what the response is," Lol | |||
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"My advice would be to start all over together as a couple. Begin by fantasising in bed together. Then build from there. Discover his sexual side together. He is bound to have deep sexual fantasies that he has probably suppressed for years. Now he has met an open minded woman they can be slowly brought out together as a couple. Don't worry about the destination of swinging or getting a physical meet. Just enjoy the journey and see where it leads x" Totally agree. Enjoy the journey and see where it takes you. In most cases women are always the driving force of most successful relationships I know of. So steer it in the direction that suits it best. Good luck. | |||
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