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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" Agree | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Agree" what that I am overthink it lol!! | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" Wifeswappers have always said this, the swingers have a much more welcoming attitude. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" If you have to use the term swinger to cover Your lack of monogamy fine dont bring single males into it . | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! If you have to use the term swinger to cover Your lack of monogamy fine dont bring single males into it . " | |||
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"I'm just a shagger " mmm sounds nice. | |||
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"Think I prefer either reguler pleasure giver or walking sex toy for hire... player sounds so cynical " *regular I agree surely a swinger is based on the lifestyle not relatiinship status... | |||
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"Some single men definitely ate swingers understand the scene perfectly understand boundaries some are just chancers looking for a legover " | |||
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"I thought that swinging involved sharing your partner sexually with other couples. It's the swapping that is essentially swinging. So from that perspective single people arnt technically swingers. " So couples who only meet singles are not swingers either? | |||
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"Why does it matter so much? " I'm not sure that many people care too much, but there are some that seem to care a bit more about who is a "real swinger" and doing "real swinging"... Lots just want to enjoy the journey. | |||
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"Oh come now. You'd think the way some people write that swingers are blessed with some kind of additional gene, some higher understanding. Is it not all about connections and relationships and human interactions. I'm interested in understanding if people think its genuinely a lifestyle choice or if its simply a pleasure and leisure activity like a round of golf or seeing a movie... What shall we do tonight..? Fancy a beer and meeting up with a lovely couple and see what unfolds.? No? Let's go to the gym instead. its Friday night... Its compulsory we meet strangers and fuck them. " The Swinger Elite The types whose world caved in when they can't fuck strangers anymore | |||
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"The “swinging” 60’s was all about free love whether single or in a relationship so it wasn’t about ‘status’, just about free love. Swinging can be for many not the few!" The swinging 60s was about freedom from all forms of precieved oppression and social norms, free love was just one expression. Lots of people embraced the swinging 60s that didn't engage in free love. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Agree" Disagree. Among many other definitions (including Glen Miller fans ) the Oxford dictionary defines a swinger as "a person who engages in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners" So while a single guy may not be able to swap partners he can certainly engage in group sex. | |||
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"Why does it matter so much? I'm not sure that many people care too much, but there are some that seem to care a bit more about who is a "real swinger" and doing "real swinging"... Lots just want to enjoy the journey. " Yep | |||
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"I thought that swinging involved sharing your partner sexually with other couples. It's the swapping that is essentially swinging. So from that perspective single people arnt technically swingers. So couples who only meet singles are not swingers either? " Yes, that would be right. Lots of people outside if fab have lots of sex in different situations. I have had 3somes in my younger single days, wouldn't have seen it as swinging. Just look up any dictionary definition of swinging and most include swapping spouses, which in my mind is swinging at it's core. | |||
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"I'm just a shagger " Shaggeress ? Great comment and stance !! | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Wifeswappers have always said this, the swingers have a much more welcoming attitude." That's a very interesting point Bobbitupper (Hope you're keeping well btw ) Swinging is a lifestyle for singles and couples. Wife swapping is a totally different thing. All those couples that don't think it's for single males or females.We have known people split up from a couple and still swing as a single. Both the males and the females. We both were singles on fab before we got together so don't see it as any different in our humble opinion. | |||
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"I'm just a shagger Shaggeress ? Great comment and stance !!" That's me then. Shaggeress | |||
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"I'm just a shagger Shaggeress ? Great comment and stance !! That's me then. Shaggeress " and a very fine looking one you are !! X | |||
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"I'm just a shagger Shaggeress ? Great comment and stance !! That's me then. Shaggeress and a very fine looking one you are !! X" Bless you | |||
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"The same would apply to single women, too, wouldn’t it? " You’d think so, wouldn’t you? But it’s almost always single men who are told they aren’t swingers, and single women are unicorns everyone wants so no-one complains about us. Yes, there are a lot of single men who don’t have a clue and aren’t swingers, and the only reason they want to meet couples is because they think it’s an easier way to get to a woman. And I wouldn’t have called myself a swinger when I first joined - I just wanted to get laid lol. But now I think I can reasonably call myself a swinger, and I don’t see why single men can’t be as well. | |||
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"I'm not sure it applies to singles as surely that's just frequent casual sex? I think there needs to be a relationship component too, so swapping couples, hotwives, hotgirlfriends, stag and vixen, cuckold, etc. Or those in poly relationships. But not cheaters. Xx" I think if someone is into threesomes (or more) that goes beyond casual sex as it’s not something that’s the norm in the vanilla world, and where else should you look for those things if not the swinging scene? But yes, if you only want to have 1-on-1 sex then I’d say you’re not a swinger. | |||
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"I was a swinger with my ex-wife and enjoyed many years of clubs and parties. Now I am single but my mentality hasn't changed, so in my eyes I'm still a swinger. Its a mentality and lifestyle and part of that is accepting others will have different views and beliefs, so to some I'm not a swinger. " 'Accepting others will have different views and beliefs'- that doesn't sound like Swingers at all!! | |||
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"Also, maybe it’s because I’m just a godforsaken solo (apparently non-)swinger, but the traditional “two couples swapping” sounds incredibly boring and limiting to me. Even on my couple profile I don’t want to be limited to that, I want the FFMs, MMFs, foursomes, groups etc. So much more fun." Good post. | |||
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"I think swinging is more a lifestyle thing so, with all the singles, some are just fuckers and don't really get involved and some are swingers" I agree with this. My lifestyle has stayed the same both in and out of relationships. | |||
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"Are single females " Gender not relevant (or shouldn't be) to your attitude. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Agreewhat that I am overthink it lol!!" If hes paying with both male and female then yes | |||
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"For us it's more about the attitude of the Single person, some attend clubs, party's and organised socials and fit in with everyone. And others just see it as a free way to get sex " A free way to get sex? Presumably that refers to men and women.. And for that matter TV / TS? You mean like consenting adults having a good physically intimate time together. How terrible is that. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Wifeswappers have always said this, the swingers have a much more welcoming attitude. That's a very interesting point Bobbitupper (Hope you're keeping well btw ) Swinging is a lifestyle for singles and couples. Wife swapping is a totally different thing. All those couples that don't think it's for single males or females.We have known people split up from a couple and still swing as a single. Both the males and the females. We both were singles on fab before we got together so don't see it as any different in our humble opinion. " Hi Mr and Miss Nice, I am very well thank you for asking. I'm swingling along nicely. Looking forward to seeing you at the next Leeds social once all the panic is over. | |||
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"What about single women ?" Exactly why just mention guys surely that would mean single women like me must be the same so | |||
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"What about single women ? Exactly why just mention guys surely that would mean single women like me must be the same so " Yes but you are a unicorn | |||
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"What about single women ? Exactly why just mention guys surely that would mean single women like me must be the same so Yes but you are a unicorn " Only if the mood takes me. Surely tho it makes single guys be unihorns tho | |||
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"What about single women ? Exactly why just mention guys surely that would mean single women like me must be the same so Yes but you are a unicorn Only if the mood takes me. Surely tho it makes single guys be unihorns tho " Cock is plenty on here I’ve heard | |||
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"What about single women ? Exactly why just mention guys surely that would mean single women like me must be the same so Yes but you are a unicorn Only if the mood takes me. Surely tho it makes single guys be unihorns tho Cock is plenty on here I’ve heard " There are a few here alright | |||
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"Why does it matter so much? I'm not sure that many people care too much, but there are some that seem to care a bit more about who is a "real swinger" and doing "real swinging"... Lots just want to enjoy the journey. " Thank you I don't feel I need to define myself in order to fit into anyone's description but I know I'm not a wifeswapper cause I don't have a wife | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" I'm not sure if they are swingers but on here loads of them seem to be very short. | |||
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"I'm not sure it applies to singles as surely that's just frequent casual sex? I think there needs to be a relationship component too, so swapping couples, hotwives, hotgirlfriends, stag and vixen, cuckold, etc. Or those in poly relationships. But not cheaters. Xx" So if a couple play with a single guy or girl, are couple swinging and the single just cheating? | |||
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"I'd say the main difference between a single male swinger and a wannafuck is attitude. " Exactly this. I'm single & straight but I enjoy sex where multiple people are involved. No idea if I need to label it but I consider myself as a swinger. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" We have asked this question to ourselves alot, we don't see them as swingers, in our opinion, swingers are people who have sex, party's etc with other swingers, which is usually couples?? | |||
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"I think I came to Fab because I was exhausted by trying to interpret what was required from more mainstream sites such as POF and knowing that whoever I hooked up with on Fab would be completely open minded about sex and what they did or did not like, enjoy or want to experiment with. I have met some lovely adults and some quite strange ones too over the various times I have been a fabber and I use it less in the sense of being a traditional swinger and more to find similar minded partners. I guess that means I am not actually a swinger but I feel it does give me an understanding and empathy towards what it means to be a swinger?" I completely agree with this. I was sick of males either not entertaining u if u didnt sleep with them or blocking u after they slept with you. That's why I came to Fab to know where I stand. I love sex and on here the people are like minded. I think I am probably a fabber not a swinger then seeing as I am a single x | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! We have asked this question to ourselves alot, we don't see them as swingers, in our opinion, swingers are people who have sex, party's etc with other swingers, which is usually couples?? " And yet, your profile says you’re looking for single men and women, so what do you call those singles that you meet? | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" Labels are for tins | |||
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"Same would apply to a single girl " Yes, but everyone likes those | |||
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"Same would apply to a single girl Yes, but everyone likes those" That’s the thing, isn’t it? Everything they say about single men should apply to us as well, it’s such a double standard. | |||
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" One friend of mine even sends her husband over to play with me. I get off it massively as I know they're both genuinely into sharing. " Sounds like how we play. I definitely think you qualify as a swinger! | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! We have asked this question to ourselves alot, we don't see them as swingers, in our opinion, swingers are people who have sex, party's etc with other swingers, which is usually couples?? And yet, your profile says you’re looking for single men and women, so what do you call those singles that you meet?" I'm assuming that question was to me, if you read it again u will find we are looking for bi males and no females who we can both have fun with and not just one of us...we will not entertain a single straight man for the reasons which we believe as to why they need a couple for sex...why not just get a single fem or single man to have one on one sex with... | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! We have asked this question to ourselves alot, we don't see them as swingers, in our opinion, swingers are people who have sex, party's etc with other swingers, which is usually couples?? And yet, your profile says you’re looking for single men and women, so what do you call those singles that you meet? I'm assuming that question was to me, if you read it again u will find we are looking for bi males and no females who we can both have fun with and not just one of us...we will not entertain a single straight man for the reasons which we believe as to why they need a couple for sex...why not just get a single fem or single man to have one on one sex with..." I did read it. Doesn’t change the fact that those people, bi or straight, are singles. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" You say call it what you want but you refuse to accept the name many people call it swinging! A swinger is someone into sex with different partners, that may be someone else's husband or wife, it may be two or more women at the same time or men at the same time it may be as part of a gangbang or even as part of an orgy. Swinging is liberated sex, it may include a social side but it does not have to. | |||
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"Same would apply to a single girl Yes, but everyone likes those That’s the thing, isn’t it? Everything they say about single men should apply to us as well, it’s such a double standard." I think it does apply to single women as well. If they haven't got the right attitude they aren't swingers lol | |||
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"Same would apply to a single girl Yes, but everyone likes those That’s the thing, isn’t it? Everything they say about single men should apply to us as well, it’s such a double standard. I think it does apply to single women as well. If they haven't got the right attitude they aren't swingers lol" That makes you unusual amongst couples. Most fall over themselves for a single, bi woman regardless of her attitude. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" Of course single people be it male or female can be swingers. If they are attending parties and meeting & playing with others then yes they are swingers . Does it mean couples only meeting other couples are just wifeswappers or are they classed as swingers ? | |||
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"The same would apply to single women, too, wouldn’t it? You’d think so, wouldn’t you? But it’s almost always single men who are told they aren’t swingers, and single women are unicorns everyone wants so no-one complains about us. Yes, there are a lot of single men who don’t have a clue and aren’t swingers, and the only reason they want to meet couples is because they think it’s an easier way to get to a woman. And I wouldn’t have called myself a swinger when I first joined - I just wanted to get laid lol. But now I think I can reasonably call myself a swinger, and I don’t see why single men can’t be as well." Because it seems all single men must be tarred with the same brush and put down at every opportubity From the way some forum threads I've read have gone; it's almost a wonder single men are even allowed here | |||
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"End if day swinging has changed over the years and now encompasses more than just couples. Singles of any gender are as entitled to be classed a swinger" Definitely m8 | |||
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"Depends on the mindset. I have been on here as part of a swinging couple. As a general rule if we got the vibe that the guys we met would be open to swinging as a couple if not single it worked in their favour. If we got the vibe that they'd NEVER do this if they had a partner we gave them a wide berth." Got to agree with this too many guys on here wouldn't dream of sharing thier partner but happy if its spmeone else's. | |||
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"Why does it matter so much? " It's just another angle for him to stick a knife into single guys. It boosts his ego. | |||
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"Why does it matter so much? It's just another angle for him to stick a knife into single guys. It boosts his ego." | |||
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"I think a swinger is someone who prefers multiple partners. So single people can be swingers in my opinion." I agree I love spending time with couples and not just sex but good to get a good friendly relationship with them xx Yes and fun with couples is great good to help them achieve what they like without arseholes on this site fuckin them around time wasting | |||
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"That is a really clever question. No how can a single person swing " Join a couple, done! They're never used to be singles prevalent in the scene but there is now. Times have changed. The 'you have to have a partner to swap' mentality tends to be the old school type from what we see. | |||
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"That is a really clever question. No how can a single person swing Join a couple, done! They're never used to be singles prevalent in the scene but there is now. Times have changed. The 'you have to have a partner to swap' mentality tends to be the old school type from what we see." Times have changed in good ways that couples can open up and ask single females and guys without it being not natural happy days | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers." Uurrgghh so many typos, damn tiny iphone keyboard | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers." Fully agree with what you say. | |||
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"Think I prefer either reguler pleasure giver or walking sex toy for hire... player sounds so cynical " But if you break it down you are exactly that! And we would be for the other person or couple. Just a prop in people’s fantasies as cold as it sounds. | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it." I can definitely see what you’re talking about with old days and I can’t really comment on that because we have only been in the world a few years but now I believe “swinging” is more women driven. Look at all the hotwife single and couples profiles and all the single women profiles women’s role in swinging has never been stronger surly? | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it. I can definitely see what you’re talking about with old days and I can’t really comment on that because we have only been in the world a few years but now I believe “swinging” is more women driven. Look at all the hotwife single and couples profiles and all the single women profiles women’s role in swinging has never been stronger surly? " And long my it continue | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it." Very well said young lady I couldn't agree more! | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it." I really think that the couples who insist Swinging is only for couples, have bad guilt about what they are doing. They need to call it something 'elite' to take that guilt away. If they admitted to themselves that they're just shagging around and breaking the vows they made in church they would probably spontaneously combust. | |||
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"The same would apply to single women, too, wouldn’t it? You’d think so, wouldn’t you? But it’s almost always single men who are told they aren’t swingers, and single women are unicorns everyone wants so no-one complains about us. Yes, there are a lot of single men who don’t have a clue and aren’t swingers, and the only reason they want to meet couples is because they think it’s an easier way to get to a woman. And I wouldn’t have called myself a swinger when I first joined - I just wanted to get laid lol. But now I think I can reasonably call myself a swinger, and I don’t see why single men can’t be as well. Because it seems all single men must be tarred with the same brush and put down at every opportubity From the way some forum threads I've read have gone; it's almost a wonder single men are even allowed here" It’s not fair, I agree but then if you had been on the receiving end of how a lot of single men behave then you might understand why it happens. | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it. I really think that the couples who insist Swinging is only for couples, have bad guilt about what they are doing. They need to call it something 'elite' to take that guilt away. If they admitted to themselves that they're just shagging around and breaking the vows they made in church they would probably spontaneously combust. " For some maybe but I can’t really agree with this. There are plenty if couples (we are one) who enjoy group sex (ie three or more people involved). We don’t feel the remotest bit guilty about it. Now because of how judgemental society is we don’t tell our vanilla friends and family about it but that doesn’t mean we are ashamed, just pragmatic. As we said above, singles (men, women, TV/TS) can all be swingers but in our view labelling someone as such is dependent on what they are predominantly trying to find is non vanilla sex. If what you are looking for sexually cannot be listed on a normal dating app/site then it means you are probably a bit “kinky”. Swingers are by definition (and viewed by society) as kinky and not the “norm”. | |||
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"Another thing that this question always brings up for me is “wife swapping”. So many couples (and some singles) immediately jump to “no singles aren’t swingers, you have to have a partner to swap”. For me, “wife swapping” sounds horrible, as if the husband makes the decisions and the wife has no agency. Even worse is the “car keys in a bowl” scenario/stereotype. Equating the women with property and questionable in terms of consent? It’s somewhere between tacky and gross. And before you all jump on me with your “swinging isn’t like that anymore”s and your “times have changed”s, stop and think because that is EXACTLY the point we’re making! It’s changed from that narrow and boring definition, and is now an exciting mix of people and combinations and possibilities. If couple to couple partner swapping is all you want, more power to you. But please stop telling everyone else we’re wrong for how we do it. I really think that the couples who insist Swinging is only for couples, have bad guilt about what they are doing. They need to call it something 'elite' to take that guilt away. If they admitted to themselves that they're just shagging around and breaking the vows they made in church they would probably spontaneously combust. For some maybe but I can’t really agree with this. There are plenty if couples (we are one) who enjoy group sex (ie three or more people involved). We don’t feel the remotest bit guilty about it. Now because of how judgemental society is we don’t tell our vanilla friends and family about it but that doesn’t mean we are ashamed, just pragmatic. As we said above, singles (men, women, TV/TS) can all be swingers but in our view labelling someone as such is dependent on what they are predominantly trying to find is non vanilla sex. If what you are looking for sexually cannot be listed on a normal dating app/site then it means you are probably a bit “kinky”. Swingers are by definition (and viewed by society) as kinky and not the “norm”. " I don't mean all couples. | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! We have asked this question to ourselves alot, we don't see them as swingers, in our opinion, swingers are people who have sex, party's etc with other swingers, which is usually couples?? And yet, your profile says you’re looking for single men and women, so what do you call those singles that you meet?" There is a whiff of hypocrisy in their statement to be honest I totally agree if you hold single men in such contempt why put younwant to meet them? | |||
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"I think that's unfair to call every guy a player or shagger. I have been into the lifestyle as a single guy for years. I can honestly tell you I can get more sex outside the community and a lot easier. But I love the lifestyle love the encounters I have had I would live to have a partner who I could share his with.But be honest how many women out there would do this. And if your going to label all single men why cant single women be viewed as negatively?I would say 60% of women are after money. However I have faith some are genuinely swingers." No disrespect intended and apologies if it came across that way | |||
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"I think that's unfair to call every guy a player or shagger. I have been into the lifestyle as a single guy for years. I can honestly tell you I can get more sex outside the community and a lot easier. But I love the lifestyle love the encounters I have had I would live to have a partner who I could share his with.But be honest how many women out there would do this. And if your going to label all single men why cant single women be viewed as negatively?I would say 60% of women are after money. However I have faith some are genuinely swingers. No disrespect intended and apologies if it came across that way" But I’m your opening sentence you singled out men and not all singles? Not sure why the sex of a single person is relevant.. | |||
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"Lot's of comments, and the general feels seems to be that it's an attitude and approach that makes someone a swinger. Which I would agree with. I would also add that the scene would be smaller and probably less interesting/fun if it were strictly couples only. As has been said many times on FAB, actually you make your own rules and play how you wish. As long as no-one tries to force their way of thinking into being the only way, then all is good." | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol! Wifeswappers have always said this, the swingers have a much more welcoming attitude. That's a very interesting point Bobbitupper (Hope you're keeping well btw ) Swinging is a lifestyle for singles and couples. Wife swapping is a totally different thing. All those couples that don't think it's for single males or females.We have known people split up from a couple and still swing as a single. Both the males and the females. We both were singles on fab before we got together so don't see it as any different in our humble opinion. Hi Mr and Miss Nice, I am very well thank you for asking. I'm swingling along nicely. Looking forward to seeing you at the next Leeds social once all the panic is over. " We love the Leeds social. Always a pleasure to chat with you | |||
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"Question? How can a single guy be a “swinger” surely he is just a player / shagger call it what you want? I understand they have a place in the lifestyle some couples in relationships have certain fantasies of course I just don’t see them as swingers. I am probably overthinking it. Lol!" I do think it's very unfortunate that the majority of people who swing are single men. Must be something in that? I suppose it shows females simply have different preferences. However I guess there's always the need for a single person of either sex, when a swinging couple want to try something new. | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers." I disagree. There's plenty of single men on here who are just using the site as a way to get laid but there's also single guys on here I've met or would meet one on one that I would definitely count as swingers and participate in the scene. The openess about having multiple sexual partners is a big part of it for me. None of the unspoken secretiveness you get with dating sites. | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers. I disagree. There's plenty of single men on here who are just using the site as a way to get laid but there's also single guys on here I've met or would meet one on one that I would definitely count as swingers and participate in the scene. The openess about having multiple sexual partners is a big part of it for me. None of the unspoken secretiveness you get with dating sites. " This so much! I may have a wife and 2 girlfriends but I still come on here to get some action on the side. | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers. I disagree. There's plenty of single men on here who are just using the site as a way to get laid but there's also single guys on here I've met or would meet one on one that I would definitely count as swingers and participate in the scene. The openess about having multiple sexual partners is a big part of it for me. None of the unspoken secretiveness you get with dating sites. " Not clear on what you disagree with? We seem to be saying same thing? To be clear in our opinion “swinging” is defined by sexual activity that is not available (or easily requested) through vanilla dating channels. That will include kinky fetishes (that could be 1-2-1) and any form of group sex. | |||
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"Lots of responses and not read them all but here is our two pence worth... Single guys absolutely can describe themselves as swingers in the condition that they are open to Different partner combos. If they like threesomes, moresomes, orgies, gangbangs then yep that is all part of swinging. However, if they only really want to meet one person at a time (female or male) then they are just shaggers/players because that can also be achieved in vanilla life. So if what they seek to experience sexually is not vanilla then they are swingers. Without doubt some single guys on this site only meet couples to gain access to the female. It is not actually the idea of a threesome (straight or bi) that excites them, it is fucking another woman and they would actually prefer the hubby/bf was not there. They are not swingers. I disagree. There's plenty of single men on here who are just using the site as a way to get laid but there's also single guys on here I've met or would meet one on one that I would definitely count as swingers and participate in the scene. The openess about having multiple sexual partners is a big part of it for me. None of the unspoken secretiveness you get with dating sites. Not clear on what you disagree with? We seem to be saying same thing? To be clear in our opinion “swinging” is defined by sexual activity that is not available (or easily requested) through vanilla dating channels. That will include kinky fetishes (that could be 1-2-1) and any form of group sex. " The part I disagree with is that you're not a swinger if you only meet one on one. | |||
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