FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

So sick of blokes

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exki11enWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I feel your pain. I'd love to do spontaneous meets but that's never gonna happen. I need at least 4 hours to get properly ready for a meet - longer ideally.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some of 'em can't even manage the dangling under the tap bit.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Men have no idea the effort we go to! Or the time it takes, quick meets even if I did them? There is no chance

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

It takes me hours to get ready too, even when I'm just off to work. Obviously going against the grain by the sound of things!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I feel your pain. I'd love to do spontaneous meets but that's never gonna happen. I need at least 4 hours to get properly ready for a meet - longer ideally. "

Really well that could work well as if I was to go for a spontaneous ride down the motorway one day would ust be arriving in your neck of the woods if ever you fancied just spontaneously getting dressed up some time hey

To be fair tho girls I dont no why most of you feel the need to spend so much time getting ready as after abit of fore play its all going to end up on the floor anyhow aint it and that gorgeous hair you spent so long to curl or straighten etc etc dee daa dee daaa is just gonna get scragged as you get ragged aint it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

"

WOW im impressed fancy a shag then ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

"

Sounds eerily familiar, apart from that I shave my hair so don't really bother with the styling. Always have my travel toiletries and shaving gear handy.

It must be just us tight yorkshiremen that make the effort by the sound of things lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excuse me!, it takes me hours to clean my cock.

I've three weeks of stale spunk under my foreskin.

never mind the highly skilled tweezering of all my crabs

and to top it off my tagnuts are causing discomfort!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow


"I feel your pain. I'd love to do spontaneous meets but that's never gonna happen. I need at least 4 hours to get properly ready for a meet - longer ideally. "

Hun....i would disagree...i think you look nice all the time...(is not creeping)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Excuse me!, it takes me hours to clean my cock.

I've three weeks of stale spunk under my foreskin.

never mind the highly skilled tweezering of all my crabs

and to top it off my tagnuts are causing discomfort!"

Im hearing ya Paddy lad im hearing ya

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

"

You're one of very few men that will actually have a wash. Yours sounds a bit like my routine... Trim my nails, shave my legs, wash my hair, shave my tache, trim my ear hair, pull the hairs out of my chin, pick the fluff out from between my toes, shave my crack, trim my minge, shave my pits, trim my toe hair, paint my toenails, put a few layers of slap on, style my hair, restyle my hair, do my hair again, breathe in as far as I can to fasten my skirt, squeeze my boobs into a push-up bra, quick squirt of air freshener and off I go!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Oh no, NOT the cold tap.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

You're one of very few men that will actually have a wash. Yours sounds a bit like my routine... Trim my nails, shave my legs, wash my hair, shave my tache, trim my ear hair, pull the hairs out of my chin, pick the fluff out from between my toes, shave my crack, trim my minge, shave my pits, trim my toe hair, paint my toenails, put a few layers of slap on, style my hair, restyle my hair, do my hair again, breathe in as far as I can to fasten my skirt, squeeze my boobs into a push-up bra, quick squirt of air freshener and off I go! "

fuck that..then ur meet doesnt turn up lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

So no copy and paste messages and unwashed cocks... Jesus demanding or what....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready. "

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving "

thanks for that bearded kiss caz...at least u shaved ur gorgeous fanny tho! xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving

thanks for that bearded kiss caz...at least u shaved ur gorgeous fanny tho! xxx"

You're welcome Paddy, I'm pretty sure the stubble rash'll calm down soon, try a bit of calamine lotion if it persists

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving

thanks for that bearded kiss caz...at least u shaved ur gorgeous fanny tho! xxx

You're welcome Paddy, I'm pretty sure the stubble rash'll calm down soon, try a bit of calamine lotion if it persists "

ur just tryin to make me white...u racist xxxxxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving

thanks for that bearded kiss caz...at least u shaved ur gorgeous fanny tho! xxx

You're welcome Paddy, I'm pretty sure the stubble rash'll calm down soon, try a bit of calamine lotion if it persists

ur just tryin to make me white...u racist xxxxxx"

Nope, turning you into a redskin - change your name to Tonto

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're going to trim your upper body hair, why not make a habit of it? I find that the skin get sused to it and you will have less chance of a cut.

How sexy is it to see a 2-3-4 line cut on your chest or abs?

I always keep my crotch trimmed and I make sure I'm shaved on a daily basis unless I am having a lazy day.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Devils advocate here?

Is the getting ready for you? or for him???

Just a thought, have you ever tried just washing your bits under a tap and then off for a meet in what ever you had on originally???

I'm just a bit confused?

Would you prefer men to have to take more time? would you prefer to take less time?

If it's men are not turning up as you would expect, then send em packing. I don't think I got this one...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey, only takes me 30 mins to get ready.

I'm with you Wyrd, I can shower, put the slap on and dress in 30 mins - 45 max if me bits need shaving "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orkscrew CurlsWoman
over a year ago

Loughborough Leics

An hour tops for me to get ready, I have long hair to wash, mousse and diffuse dry! That's if I'm already home, have the relevant products in stock, have eaten and walked the dog!....(And if he's a known entity have tidied up the bedroom etc)

Altho to be fair guys I would meet again are the ones who make an effort! Well presented, clean and smelling great, so no complaints here! Except the gorgeous one who arrives fresh from the gym...but that's a different story!...

Met one guy straight from his work (a butchery I found out), in tracksuit and cap, would have had to be worlds sexiest man to pull that off! Hence a no! And no veri from me!!

Curls x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Some of the cocks ive seen recently wouldnt be able to reach the taps xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only ever had one guy arrive not smelling and tasting amazing, shaved and delicious. I am guessing that we all probably take about the same amount of time!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I couldnt do same day meets, it takes me two days to think about it and one day to get ready lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

I call it the pre-fuck shave and pluck.

When it comes down to it, clean is what I offer and what I expect. The few meets I've had, have seen me in jeans and tee-shirt or the sort of clothes I wear all the time. Really girls, unless you're doing the naughty scanties and bedroom shoes, I think most men really don't mind.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can get ready for a meet in 20mins. Including showering lol..

Cali

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can get ready for a meet in 20mins. Including showering lol..

Cali "

i was just wondering what they all did that took so long to get ready

I always have my nails, eye brows etc done anyway so i dont class that as part of getting ready for a meet

I can shower, shave, do my hair and make up and get dressed in a hour, what the hell are you doing that takes you days to get ready?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Cock under the tap?

Baaaaad idea!!! One of two things will happen.

Cold tap - will go into hiding somewhere behind your nuts and not come out til you've given it signed confirmation that you understand the geneva convention and will be performing no further acts of torture!!

Hot tap - best hope you've got no plans for a week or two as you'll soon be of to the burns unit - followed by a week sat on the sofa watching daytime TV with a bag of frozen veg wedged between your thighs!

"the peas.......go to the peas!"

It's the shower only when cleaning your gentleman's essentials (and of course the rest of you - unless you're swampy the eco protester!) otherwise you're just asking for trouble!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A full war paint job on my face would take an hour or so to do.

A good nail job would need to be done the night before in order to dry thoroughly.

However, I seldom go to this extent in order to meet someone for a few hours of fun or to attend clubs.

The last time I wore any significant amount of make up was the first time I was at Chams. The humidity and water in the jacuzzi made me look like a panda, even though the mascara was supposed to be waterproof!

Nowadays, I would wear just a slick of black waterproof eyeliner and mascara, and bright red kiss-proof lippy, which takes no time to put on.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I couldnt do same day meets, it takes me two days to think about it and one day to get ready lol"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Devils advocate here?

Is the getting ready for you? or for him???

Just a thought, have you ever tried just washing your bits under a tap and then off for a meet in what ever you had on originally???

I'm just a bit confused?

Would you prefer men to have to take more time? would you prefer to take less time?

If it's men are not turning up as you would expect, then send em packing. I don't think I got this one... "

It was my attempt at being humourous. Clearly it only takes me 72 hours to get ready for a meet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find its 10 minutes for every decade. When your in your 20s it takes 20 minutes to get ready, 30's half an hour ect. its only a rule of thumb but I find it works for people who lie about there age on their profiles

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Days

Usually takes me around 2 hours but a good chunk of that time is straightening my hair. If I wear it up then I can be ready much quicker..lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

i tell you what.

i'll dangle my cock under a tap.you your pussy under the same and we will go from there x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

i tell you what.

i'll dangle my cock under a tap.you your pussy under the same and we will go from there x"

If I was supple enough to bend my pussy under a tap I wouldn't be on here!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some of 'em can't even manage the dangling under the tap bit. "

???????? A tap??????

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

Sounds eerily familiar, apart from that I shave my hair so don't really bother with the styling. Always have my travel toiletries and shaving gear handy.

It must be just us tight yorkshiremen that make the effort by the sound of things lol"

See I'm originally a Teessider, but I guess northern blokes have more time to get ready as it takes twice as long to drive anywhere in the south (not counting southwest as its a doddle to get about down there!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

Sounds eerily familiar, apart from that I shave my hair so don't really bother with the styling. Always have my travel toiletries and shaving gear handy.

It must be just us tight yorkshiremen that make the effort by the sound of things lol

See I'm originally a Teessider, but I guess northern blokes have more time to get ready as it takes twice as long to drive anywhere in the south (not counting southwest as its a doddle to get about down there! "

Drive? I'm in Barnsley, a Hansom cab by gaslight is the cutting edge of travel here!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

Sounds eerily familiar, apart from that I shave my hair so don't really bother with the styling. Always have my travel toiletries and shaving gear handy.

It must be just us tight yorkshiremen that make the effort by the sound of things lol

See I'm originally a Teessider, but I guess northern blokes have more time to get ready as it takes twice as long to drive anywhere in the south (not counting southwest as its a doddle to get about down there!

Drive? I'm in Barnsley, a Hansom cab by gaslight is the cutting edge of travel here! "

Ah, a true Dingle - a one leeter cab!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Excuse me!, it takes me hours to clean my cock.

I've three weeks of stale spunk under my foreskin.

never mind the highly skilled tweezering of all my crabs

and to top it off my tagnuts are causing

discomfort!"

My kind of fella lol xxx you're all having a moan about getting ready but think of me! I have to polish the false leg up, soak the teeth in Steradent, take the hairnets off, wedge a fag in the gap in me teeth and get rid of the toe bogeys! Hey presto! That's me done!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Excuse me!, it takes me hours to clean my cock.

I've three weeks of stale spunk under my foreskin.

never mind the highly skilled tweezering of all my crabs

and to top it off my tagnuts are causing

discomfort!

My kind of fella lol xxx you're all having a moan about getting ready but think of me! I have to polish the false leg up, soak the teeth in Steradent, take the hairnets off, wedge a fag in the gap in me teeth and get rid of the toe bogeys! Hey presto! That's me done! "

Are we twins?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Try to pick the right ones next time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive got all the time in the world to get ready, nobody wants to meet me anymore

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Soooo sick of blokes!!

All they have to do is dangle their cock under the tap and they're ready.

Takes me DAYS to get ready for a meet!!

"

Oh no don't group us all together lady S

Cleanliness is next to godliness for myself

Shave , face, back sack and crack !

Nail trim hair cut and good scrubbing I might even top up my tan then if a lady like strap on fun its a good old enema job lol

You have to go the full hog inside and out

Who have you been meeting ? Wurzel gummidge or steptoe ?

Haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

You're one of very few men that will actually have a wash. Yours sounds a bit like my routine... Trim my nails, shave my legs, wash my hair, shave my tache, trim my ear hair, pull the hairs out of my chin, pick the fluff out from between my toes, shave my crack, trim my minge, shave my pits, trim my toe hair, paint my toenails, put a few layers of slap on, style my hair, restyle my hair, do my hair again, breathe in as far as I can to fasten my skirt, squeeze my boobs into a push-up bra, quick squirt of air freshener and off I go! "

and then after 3 hours of rampant sex you still look like you been dragged through a hedge...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

You're one of very few men that will actually have a wash. Yours sounds a bit like my routine... Trim my nails, shave my legs, wash my hair, shave my tache, trim my ear hair, pull the hairs out of my chin, pick the fluff out from between my toes, shave my crack, trim my minge, shave my pits, trim my toe hair, paint my toenails, put a few layers of slap on, style my hair, restyle my hair, do my hair again, breathe in as far as I can to fasten my skirt, squeeze my boobs into a push-up bra, quick squirt of air freshener and off I go!

and then after 3 hours of rampant sex you still look like you been dragged through a hedge... "

3 hours??!! Nooooo I don't like quickies!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Snap! My getting ready involves a long soak obviously, washing my hair, trimming nails, shaving face, shaving chest and stomach, shaving balls, penis, trimming hair at front base of root, exfoliating, brushing teeth and mouthwash, moisturising body, deodorant and aftershave, moisturising face, choosing clothing and dressing, styling hair, making sure I have all items on me that I need for meet, then I'm off!

Even for spur of the moment meets while I'm round the country I carry a scaled down version of the above kit and need to find somewhere to carry out the above lol!

I'm afraid the idea of every man getting ready in a minute flat is now as outdated as the idea no women like sex with more than one partner...

You're one of very few men that will actually have a wash. Yours sounds a bit like my routine... Trim my nails, shave my legs, wash my hair, shave my tache, trim my ear hair, pull the hairs out of my chin, pick the fluff out from between my toes, shave my crack, trim my minge, shave my pits, trim my toe hair, paint my toenails, put a few layers of slap on, style my hair, restyle my hair, do my hair again, breathe in as far as I can to fasten my skirt, squeeze my boobs into a push-up bra, quick squirt of air freshener and off I go!

and then after 3 hours of rampant sex you still look like you been dragged through a hedge...

3 hours??!! Nooooo I don't like quickies!"

3 hours I'm just finishing foreplay !!! Someone help iv got lockjaw and cramp in my tongue

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find its 10 minutes for every decade. When your in your 20s it takes 20 minutes to get ready, 30's half an hour ect. its only a rule of thumb but I find it works for people who lie about there age on their profiles "

Oh heck, in which case I'm still under the age of consent.....

So long as my hair's already washed (which it normally is!) then it's a quick shower, shave armpits, dry, dress and go. Fifteen mins. Already waxed and I don't do makeup.

Never had any complaints and have a good repeat rate!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top