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Men asking to meet

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Longer than you are at the moment...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather than asking to meet, test the waters asking where the conversation is going maybe!? How long do you leave it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Rather than asking to meet, test the waters asking where the conversation is going maybe!? How long do you leave it? "

How long is a piece of string lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just bear in mind some are full of shit mate

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone !"

Happens to us ladies too. I even managed to scare off a Navy boy!

It might be an idea to wait til they suggest it. However, with some women you'll be waiting for years, and some women are only here for messages. I'm afraid its trial and error. Good luck!

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

[Removed by poster at 15/06/12 07:25:41]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why not try a different approach such as

I'm going to (a nice bar, club etc) would be nice to see you there.

This is different as its an open invitation your going anyway regardless of there answer which means less pressure for all parties...

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By *kmale421Man
over a year ago

wirral


"Rather than asking to meet, test the waters asking where the conversation is going maybe!? How long do you leave it?

How long is a piece of string lol"

The length of a piece of string is twice the distance from the centre to one end....

However, the answer to the OP's question is unknown to mankind.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only chat to women with recent veris so you know they they actually do meet then I would suggest 2 weeks minimum unless they suggest a meet first. It takes 5 mins to write a message.

Neither of you wants to waste your time driving to a meet and then just be turned down if you don't get on

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just bear in mind some are full of shit mate "

Haha best answer so far

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where an I going wrong on here only had one meet and that was a last min thing ?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card"

I know we are not a single female and it might take longer for them to decide as they are meeting alone....but we like straight talkers, so although we don't meet people just because they ask, we like to to decide pretty quick wether we think we will meet or not.

Everyone is different, so I suppose your question would be answered with, depends on who you ae chatting to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can only speak for myself but all because i reply to a message that does not mean i want to meet them

Its a difficult one really

If someone mails you and they come over as a nice person but your not really attracted to them should you just ignor them? i find thats rude, if they send a message that catches my eye i will reply and chat but does that give out the wrong signals? do guys think that if they get a reply that means the womens showing a interest in meeting or do they realise that some are womens just being polite and chatting, on here should you only talk to people you want to meet? and blank everyone else, i dont ignor people in real life because i dont fancy them so why should i on here? but then when they ask if i want to meet and i say no is that classed as time wasting?

See what i mean?

Is people being polite seen as leading people on or should women not talk to guys they dont fancy?

Personally i could never be that arrogant that i will ignor someone just because i dont want to fuck them, im always happy to chat to people, some will take that the wrong way but im not willing to change my personality just because some guys on here cant accept that all because i reply to a message that does not mean i will meet them but then if a guy asked to meet and i didnt want to i wouldnt be 'puff' gone i would tell them i liked talking to them but they're not for me sexually and hope they was mature enough to not block me because of that

Suppose it depends what your on here for, yeah im here for sex but thats not the be all and end all of being on this site for some it is so they see talking to someone they wont get sex from as a waste of time, i dont

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Why not try a different approach such as

I'm going to (a nice bar, club etc) would be nice to see you there.

This is different as its an open invitation your going anyway regardless of there answer which means less pressure for all parties..."

Yeah but I'm not here to date its a swingers site you can meet anyone at a bar infact its prob easier to pull than on here only problem is the general woman wants to date not swing its crazy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think it depends on the person your talking to. Personally if a guy i'm looking to meet starts talking about sex, what i'll do when we meet etc, its an instant turn off for me and i'll end the conversation there

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I can only speak for myself but all because i reply to a message that does not mean i want to meet them

Its a difficult one really

If someone mails you and they come over as a nice person but your not really attracted to them should you just ignor them? i find thats rude, if they send a message that catches my eye i will reply and chat but does that give out the wrong signals? do guys think that if they get a reply that means the womens showing a interest in meeting or do they realise that some are womens just being polite and chatting, on here should you only talk to people you want to meet? and blank everyone else, i dont ignor people in real life because i dont fancy them so why should i on here? but then when they ask if i want to meet and i say no is that classed as time wasting?

See what i mean?

Is people being polite seen as leading people on or should women not talk to guys they dont fancy?

Personally i could never be that arrogant that i will ignor someone just because i dont want to fuck them, im always happy to chat to people, some will take that the wrong way but im not willing to change my personality just because some guys on here cant accept that all because i reply to a message that does not mean i will meet them but then if a guy asked to meet and i didnt want to i wouldnt be 'puff' gone i would tell them i liked talking to them but they're not for me sexually and hope they was mature enough to not block me because of that

Suppose it depends what your on here for, yeah im here for sex but thats not the be all and end all of being on this site for some it is so they see talking to someone they wont get sex from as a waste of time, i dont "

Good answer but when someone says yes ill dress up for you and we can try all sorts that to me says ask for a meet I'm not talking about a bit of banter I mean when they say yes let's do this etc then you suggest a meet and they don't reply again haha I guess there just messers as for replying you know when your chatting someones not interested so your polite anyway and leave it at that I wouldn't dream of giving out abuse at a knock back at least they have had the decency to say no thanks there's nothing worse and more frustrating than being ignored after you have been chatting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i think it depends on the person your talking to. Personally if a guy i'm looking to meet starts talking about sex, what i'll do when we meet etc, its an instant turn off for me and i'll end the conversation there"

I am just the same

Would much sooner a meet just happen, gauge the chemistry and take it from there.

Talking about what you want to do to someone in bed just seems to take the spark of what MIGHT happen, if everything goes well.

If nothing happens, what have you lost ?

You've met someone, had a couple of drinks and a chat - if that leads to the bedroom, then brilliant, if it doesn't then you have still had a pleasant evening.

In my books that doesn't amount to a date in the slightest. It is more a meeting to suss out whether the person behind the message has the spark in real life to make you want to jump in bed with them.

Some do, some don't. Men and women alike.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Numbers

The right number of messages per day is vital, one too many and you are a stalker, answer the next day and you are not interested.

Timing is critical... ask one message too soon and you will be dropped like a hot stone, one too late and you are just a time waster.

Only problem is the number is different! not only for every woman, but for every woman it resets to another random number every random number of minutes...

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The type of messages exchanged are a good indicator.

If the conversation feels a little forced with the guys only saying the right things ti impress, rather than a genuine trying to get to know someone, then I won't bother communicating after a few messages.

It is offputting when a guy sends a message saying 'you're gorgeous, great pics', ill then answer saying thanks, you look nice too' and the next message will be 'when shall we meet'. If I dare say 'well tell me a little about yourself' and they reply 'what do you want to know' then I will cut all communication as I know that they bore me.

This sounds very arrogant too and I don't mean to, but I've been chatting to some lovely guys and just haven't had the time to get round to meeting, so I have a 1aiting list as it were. Sorry that sounds terrible, but if I've been chatting for a while with other guys and we've shared a lengthy time chatting, then a one message wonder is not really gonna be worth it.

Sometimes of course you are just available or in the vicinity as someone fairly new to messaging, so a quick meet works

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

god this is a hard one kinda dont like the whole.. babe stuff either.. give me genuine any day of the week sprinkled with lots of banter..

However i like the ping pong and yap for scotland does that make me look like a stalker then??

confused.com. lol.. guys some are just fickle lol..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can only speak for myself but all because i reply to a message that does not mean i want to meet them

Its a difficult one really

If someone mails you and they come over as a nice person but your not really attracted to them should you just ignor them? i find thats rude, if they send a message that catches my eye i will reply and chat but does that give out the wrong signals? do guys think that if they get a reply that means the womens showing a interest in meeting or do they realise that some are womens just being polite and chatting, on here should you only talk to people you want to meet? and blank everyone else, i dont ignor people in real life because i dont fancy them so why should i on here? but then when they ask if i want to meet and i say no is that classed as time wasting?

See what i mean?

Is people being polite seen as leading people on or should women not talk to guys they dont fancy?

Personally i could never be that arrogant that i will ignor someone just because i dont want to fuck them, im always happy to chat to people, some will take that the wrong way but im not willing to change my personality just because some guys on here cant accept that all because i reply to a message that does not mean i will meet them but then if a guy asked to meet and i didnt want to i wouldnt be 'puff' gone i would tell them i liked talking to them but they're not for me sexually and hope they was mature enough to not block me because of that

Suppose it depends what your on here for, yeah im here for sex but thats not the be all and end all of being on this site for some it is so they see talking to someone they wont get sex from as a waste of time, i dont

Good answer but when someone says yes ill dress up for you and we can try all sorts that to me says ask for a meet I'm not talking about a bit of banter I mean when they say yes let's do this etc then you suggest a meet and they don't reply again haha I guess there just messers as for replying you know when your chatting someones not interested so your polite anyway and leave it at that I wouldn't dream of giving out abuse at a knock back at least they have had the decency to say no thanks there's nothing worse and more frustrating than being ignored after you have been chatting"

well no i wouldnt talk about sex or dressing up for people i didnt intend to meet, to me that is leading someone one

Infact i dont usually talk like that after ive agreed to meet lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Rather than asking to meet, test the waters asking where the conversation is going maybe!? How long do you leave it? "

Good advise - but men generally dont take good advise on here do they lol - its all or nothing - as a Bisexual man trust me i get my fair share unsoliciated meeting requests from people who NEVER bother to read my profile - so its not just str8 guys n gals suffering lol

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

actually... for me I tend to not be the person to bring up the subject of meeting... I'll talk to someone until they feel they are comfortable enough to want to bring up the subject.....

I am like the others... bring it up in a way that I feel is forced or pushy... then you'll send me scarpering in the other direction.... most of the best conversations flow naturally... just because we happen to be on a site that has sex in it... doesn't mean we have to talk about sex 24/7....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"god this is a hard one kinda dont like the whole.. babe stuff either.. give me genuine any day of the week sprinkled with lots of banter..

However i like the ping pong and yap for scotland does that make me look like a stalker then??

confused.com. lol.. guys some are just fickle lol.."

No I wouldn't say that's stalkerish I love the banter and chit chat the more you chat the more I feel at ease I'd be nervous as hell meeting someone after 1 message it seems that most women won't engage in chit chat the first reply you get is face pic FACE PIC ?

haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I can only speak for myself but all because i reply to a message that does not mean i want to meet them

Its a difficult one really

If someone mails you and they come over as a nice person but your not really attracted to them should you just ignor them? i find thats rude, if they send a message that catches my eye i will reply and chat but does that give out the wrong signals? do guys think that if they get a reply that means the womens showing a interest in meeting or do they realise that some are womens just being polite and chatting, on here should you only talk to people you want to meet? and blank everyone else, i dont ignor people in real life because i dont fancy them so why should i on here? but then when they ask if i want to meet and i say no is that classed as time wasting?

See what i mean?

Is people being polite seen as leading people on or should women not talk to guys they dont fancy?

Personally i could never be that arrogant that i will ignor someone just because i dont want to fuck them, im always happy to chat to people, some will take that the wrong way but im not willing to change my personality just because some guys on here cant accept that all because i reply to a message that does not mean i will meet them but then if a guy asked to meet and i didnt want to i wouldnt be 'puff' gone i would tell them i liked talking to them but they're not for me sexually and hope they was mature enough to not block me because of that

Suppose it depends what your on here for, yeah im here for sex but thats not the be all and end all of being on this site for some it is so they see talking to someone they wont get sex from as a waste of time, i dont

Good answer but when someone says yes ill dress up for you and we can try all sorts that to me says ask for a meet I'm not talking about a bit of banter I mean when they say yes let's do this etc then you suggest a meet and they don't reply again haha I guess there just messers as for replying you know when your chatting someones not interested so your polite anyway and leave it at that I wouldn't dream of giving out abuse at a knock back at least they have had the decency to say no thanks there's nothing worse and more frustrating than being ignored after you have been chatting

well no i wouldnt talk about sex or dressing up for people i didnt intend to meet, to me that is leading someone one

Infact i dont usually talk like that after ive agreed to meet lol"

General time wasters then see its not only women who have messers contacting them and then this is prob why guys ask am I in with a chance before they get chatting to save time

Fancy a fuck (guy)

Yeah you look nice let's chat first see if we get on (woman)

Ok (guy)

Life would be so simpler

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i think it depends on the person your talking to. Personally if a guy i'm looking to meet starts talking about sex, what i'll do when we meet etc, its an instant turn off for me and i'll end the conversation there"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card"

It is going to depend on the women.. I would have asked about when a guy can meet on the first message I sent if I liked his photos.. As I dont like to waste time.. but then I dont really do the chatting either.

Its phonecall... when can you meet, are you okay with what we are looking for.. and meet set up there and then..

I think that it would be best to let the women do the asking though.. that way you wont risk offending.. as guys are damned if the do and damned if they dont on many issues on here.

Cali

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By *ncMan
over a year ago

Dudley


"

General time wasters then see its not only women who have messers contacting them and then this is prob why guys ask am I in with a chance before they get chatting to save time

Fancy a fuck (guy)

Yeah you look nice let's chat first see if we get on (woman)

Ok (guy)

Life would be so simpler

"

I think the problem here is that you see a swingers site as a sort of sexual take away, phone in your order and a hot woman arrives. Swinging is about fucking, but not JUST about fucking and some people take longer to decide whether they want to go there with a particular person or not. I think until you accept that you'll not only be disappointed, but add to the crappy reputation that single guys have on the scene.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

General time wasters then see its not only women who have messers contacting them and then this is prob why guys ask am I in with a chance before they get chatting to save time

Fancy a fuck (guy)

Yeah you look nice let's chat first see if we get on (woman)

Ok (guy)

Life would be so simpler

I think the problem here is that you see a swingers site as a sort of sexual take away, phone in your order and a hot woman arrives. Swinging is about fucking, but not JUST about fucking and some people take longer to decide whether they want to go there with a particular person or not. I think until you accept that you'll not only be disappointed, but add to the crappy reputation that single guys have on the scene."

haha sexual take away i like that

"hello can i have the cream of some young guy please"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best answer yet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best answer yet! "

To _nc!

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By *awkeye and HotlipsCouple
over a year ago

Takeley

spot on, it's not about getting your leg over.....well it is, but people getting on with people. I suspect that the folk struggling to get a meet on here, would struggle to get a date in real life. Make some effort, be interesting, flirtatious, funny, put something of yourself into it! We had a message from a single guy who said he had more success on a dating site, and I believe him. We have to like the people we meet!!! But then it takes all sorts....sexual takeaway, lol classic!

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By *ncMan
over a year ago

Dudley


"

haha sexual take away i like that

"hello can i have the cream of some young guy please" "

Lol, I see you haven't changed NN!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fancy a fuck (guy)

Yeah you look nice let's chat first see if we get on (woman)

Ok (guy)

Life would be so simpler

"

if women thought like that also as much as men the worlds population would be out of control haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

haha sexual take away i like that

"hello can i have the cream of some young guy please"

Lol, I see you haven't changed NN! "

lol would you want me to?

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By *ncMan
over a year ago

Dudley


"

haha sexual take away i like that

"hello can i have the cream of some young guy please"

Lol, I see you haven't changed NN!

lol would you want me to? "

NEVER! You are a constant star in a changing universe!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I chat on here for awhile, then progress to the phone call. It usually takes a minimum of two from first contact to arranging the meet. If they get as far as the phone it is usally a yes, unless they sound like joe pacale. Not had one yet.

I meet at home so i have my little check list and good oldfashione gut instinct

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think what a lot dont realise is all because we are on a swinging site thats not all our lifes are

Im a single mum and i work two jobs, sometimes it can be a couple or three weeks before i have time to fit a meet in, meeting people has to fit round my life not the other way round, yet time and time again men expect me to drop everything and meet them NOW and when i said im not free they want to know when i am, like im supposed to know off the top of my head, having kids all because im not doing anything does not mean i am free as i have to arrange sitters and thats something i cant know if i can arrange without asking

Tho most things on here go over my head it does piss me off sometimes how guys think i have nothing else to do besides arranging to meet them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

concentrate on making friends and the meets will take care of themselves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card"

a few possible answers here.

1. a lot of the 'women' on here are guys fantasising and just after cybersex.

2. as above but some are women fantasising.

3. some just get cold feet and cant go through with it.

i look for verified profiles or women that cam so you know they are real. if they disappear on me i assume they just happy to flirt but maybe dont fancy me for a meet.

hard to believe that every woman doesnt fancy me, i know. but man enough to accept it. lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

another thing tho. dont mean to be critical but a more expansive profile might help. yours doesnt tell any one anything about you.

Answers on a post card"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card"

no easy answer mate is there. it is a swingers site so most peopel are on here for sex, but not always. and also just because peopel are on here doesnt mean they want to meet. and of course some are just here for the tease and cant actually go through with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Kenny, I reckon many women on here are blokes getting off on the chat, also many ladies get off on the run up to a meet. I have no problem with either but they should be honest. On a number of occasions Ive turned up for a meet even with phone calls prior and then had some absolute rubbish excuses, best one my house and laptop have just been burgled but the same person was then online 4 hours later!

And if your thinking she was usng a different computer or her phone she didnt have either!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Now this question is for the ladies out there ,

I get chatting to women make them laugh talk a little dirty they respond then when you drop the question shall we meet zoom there gone ! Now I'm no pig so the question is how long should you put the question off for or should we just leave it to you guys to ask ?

Answers on a post card

no easy answer mate is there. it is a swingers site so most peopel are on here for sex, but not always. and also just because peopel are on here doesnt mean they want to meet. and of course some are just here for the tease and cant actually go through with it.

"

or they just dont want to meet the guy who brought up meeting, but might of been happy exchanging naughty messages for a bit of fun, but still intend to meet someone but are after more than somoene whos into some dirty chat, they want more of a connection maybe!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Basically there are a billion combinations of outcomes just have fun the rest will follow, if it's meant to be it will be...

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By *ornyhound54Man
over a year ago

sandhurst

[Removed by poster at 15/06/12 15:04:26]

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