FabSwingers.com forum: Transexuals not disclosing they are trans

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the context. If it’s just sex then no. If it is for a potential relationship then yes

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Personally I would like to know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

Hello,

I can only speak for me, however it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. I don’t really see it as my business.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's anyone else's business.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing,and I'm not really clued up on this,but my guess is,if someone went to the trouble of changing sex from male to female,the anguish and the pain that went with that decision,then they now truly see themselves as female and so should the world

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

What they identify as now is the important thing.

I’d hope that during a chat they would say if they’ve changed but it can be a difficult thing to go through so I wouldn’t judge anyone who found it uncomfortable.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Great replies! Thanks so far, its so nice to see people are so accepting to this

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By *9alMan
over a year ago

Bridgend

I have had sex with a few trans people only one had full surgery & she told me before, apart from being a bit tall I would not have known

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By *rSpriteandMsClitBangCouple
over a year ago

hadleigh

"I'm guessing,and I'm not really clued up on this,but my guess is,if someone went to the trouble of changing sex from male to female,the anguish and the pain that went with that decision,then they now truly see themselves as female and so should the world "

This is excellently put.

C (her)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

No, don't think they should onece post op. They're women just like any others.

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By *r_Jake70Man
over a year ago

London

I think it’s up to the individual and the nature of the friendship that is developing. In truth, it’s no one’s business but their own, but I imagine that at some point while getting to know someone (if that someone was me for instance), that it would naturally crop up on conversation in the same way as any number of personal details might.

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

As I said, I’m no expert on this but once someone identifies as a different gender, that’s how they should be treated.

There’s no league table where if they have had lower surgery it scores higher than breast surgery or anything like that.

As a straight heterosexual bloke, it’s almost unbelievable how easy I have it and my heart goes out to those who are finding it difficult.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

In a relationship I think we should open up about our past with a new partner, that’s from a personal point of view.

I’m currently chatting with one lady over the internet dating scene, does she need to know about my crossdressing in the early stages of our communication with each other, not yet. But eventually she will, it’s only fair because this is a part of what makes me, me (if that makes sense).

For one off meetings, that would be down to the lady in question and the person she is meeting. So each meet may require more openness than others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm post op after surgery and I do class myself as female but on all my profiles I have trans women or ts on it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is very true. I have so much respect for trans people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe it's totally up to them whether or not they want to disclose they are trans. However, if they choose to have a full intercourse, it might be good as "designer vaginas" are usually much tighter than a vagina of someone who was born a woman. That might affect the pace and depth of penetration, etc.

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By *ouis CyphreMan
over a year ago

The Midlands

If you fancy someone you fancy them. Nothing else matters......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

They're not Transsexuals they are Transgender

A Transsexual still have a dick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope I believe its transgender has the dick transsexual has the vagina I'm not sure tho

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By *yantico86Man
over a year ago

drumchapel

I personally wouldn't be bothered

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not a man but as a bisexual woman, I’d like to be told, so that I can make an informed decision as far as whether I’d like to sleep with the person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like to know if I was planning to meet unless they have fully transitioned then they have the right to be the gender they are now. I class myself as pansexual so I wouldn't mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the omission of that information could have a psychological impact on the other person too

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By *eldomVanillaMan
over a year ago

London

If they are transgender its there choice to tell someone if they now identify as a women. So they shouldn't have to disclose it as they are legally classified as a women.

I get it that if your meeting them you may want to be informed. But if you meet them you are a consenting adult and have a choice to take anything further. If you haven't noticed anything to suggest otherwise then there's even less of an issue!

I can see why someone would feel betrayed if they wasn't told but there must have been an attraction there anyway?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In a relationship I think we should open up about our past with a new partner, that’s from a personal point of view.

I’m currently chatting with one lady over the internet dating scene, does she need to know about my crossdressing in the early stages of our communication with each other, not yet. *** But eventually she will, it’s only fair because this is a part of what makes me, me (if that makes sense). ***

For one off meetings, that would be down to the lady in question and the person she is meeting. So each meet may require more openness than others.

Especially ***

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

The way I see it (and I don't mean to offend with any of my word choices) is once the operations are done then the lady should not need to state to meets that she is trans, because she is now a woman in the whole sense, end of. For relationships this would be different, and she should be open, because her partner may want children. If her partner couldn't handle the fact she was born in the wrong body then he wasn't for her then.

It's a difficult situation indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they are transgender its there choice to tell someone if they now identify as a women. So they shouldn't have to disclose it as they are legally classified as a women.

I can see why someone would feel betrayed if they wasn't told but there must have been an attraction there anyway? "

Being pansexual I'm attracted to humans of all combinations, so for me it's not a dealbreaker should a lady tell me she's pre or post op trans. Or a trans man either. If I'm attracted to you, I'm attracted, regardless of what's under the clothes.

But for a meet with a post op lady I don't see why you would need to know? You fancy her from looking at her, she has all the associated bits being a woman. There's no need to know surely?

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By *eldomVanillaMan
over a year ago

London

"If they are transgender its there choice to tell someone if they now identify as a women. So they shouldn't have to disclose it as they are legally classified as a women.

I can see why someone would feel betrayed if they wasn't told but there must have been an attraction there anyway?

But for a meet with a post op lady I don't see why you would need to know? You fancy her from looking at her, she has all the associated bits being a woman. There's no need to know surely? "

100% agree. If you fancy someone and get on with them nothing else should matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think its up to the individual, its there body, if you have been dating the individual and are only interested in whats in there pants, Just my opinion

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks, interesting answers x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks, interesting answers x"

Can I ask, if you were post op, would you publicly identify as Trans or as the Gender you are now? Is their a moment in time where you cease to identify as trans because you feel fully able to call yourself male or female.

For me it feels as if it’s not really my business so feel free to not answer, but am curious (in many ways

) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm post op started my job 3 months after I had surgery am classed as a female and I work out in the public only been recognised as female but if someone asks then yes I will tell them I'm a trans women I never just say women as its misleading to the other person if I was to be involved with some one then yes I would tell them on first messege

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By *erdyWoman
over a year ago

wiltshire

"I'm post op started my job 3 months after I had surgery am classed as a female and I work out in the public only been recognised as female but if someone asks then yes I will tell them I'm a trans women I never just say women as its misleading to the other person if I was to be involved with some one then yes I would tell them on first messege"
Totally agree with this x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess someone hit the nail on the head, I think if it’s a casual hook up then it’s not that important to voice that, but I suppose if you want to build solid foundations with an individual, I guess you kind of have to otherwise you will remain either a mystery box about your past life, or fabricating a reality of a past life.

And there could also be the point of kids , in case the man wants them , are people in relationships gonna say they can’t have them?

I think it’s just easier to open up about it , and if they love you, they won’t have a problem with the past

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By *empsey and hotpieceMan
over a year ago

North west

"Hi, I just wanted to see what peoples opinions are on this, my no means is this meant as judgement to trans women. Im just interested to see what the overall view is on this.

There are quite a few transexual women who have had lower surgery and do not disclose to guys (even when meeting) that they are transexuals. What is your opinions on this? Do you think they should?

Thanks for your replies

This subject confuses the hell out of me.

Where is the line that a man who transitions from male to female, is considered fully female?

Personally I’d consider a trans person who looks like a female but still has a penis to be female, but a person who hasn’t got to that point to me male.

The confusion to me personally is that I (dan) would happily play with a person who still had male parts intact but looked like a woman, I’d find it a huge turn on, but I’m in no way attracted to a penis that’s attached to a man. Maybe that makes me slightly bi?

In answer to op’s question, I think it depends on if the meeting was purely sexual or potentially a relationship. If it’s just sex, I don’t think it matters, but a relationship requires both parties to be honest from the get go.

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