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soft swingers

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By *obinhood-maidmarion OP   Couple
over a year ago

North Notts

after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons.

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire

we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We only do soft swap at the moment and still enjoy ourselves. I think spending the whole time 'exploring' someones body is quite erotic.

Probably lack in confidence as well.

But we have said we may progress to full swap when we have had more meets and feel more comfortable with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say

Live and let live

Each to their own and be happy

Life is too short after all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lol we dont even get mail let alone the chance of soft or full swap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/05/12 19:23:42]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons."

It's odd that you say that you aren't judging people because all of the reasons that you list seem to be fairly judgemental.

How about for no other reason than that;s what they want and enjoy?

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is"
But you must be interested or else you wouldn't be here let alone meet and soft swap. I think people who soft swap have all or most of the fears the OP talks about which is fair enough, just don't get how anyone can be so afraid...

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with isBut you must be interested or else you wouldn't be here let alone meet and soft swap. I think people who soft swap have all or most of the fears the OP talks about which is fair enough, just don't get how anyone can be so afraid..."

not at all.

why do you HAVE to want to have full sex with someone to be happy to be with them?

we have no fear around other people, we just find sex with each other very satisfying and dont feel the need to add to it.

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

Can someone define soft swapping for me please?

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By *obinhood-maidmarion OP   Couple
over a year ago

North Notts


"after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons.

It's odd that you say that you aren't judging people because all of the reasons that you list seem to be fairly judgemental.

How about for no other reason than that;s what they want and enjoy? "

how can asking a question be judging people? I dont get it? maybe you have miss read something in a negative manner and have judges us on this

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

[Removed by poster at 29/05/12 19:40:39]

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with isBut you must be interested or else you wouldn't be here let alone meet and soft swap. I think people who soft swap have all or most of the fears the OP talks about which is fair enough, just don't get how anyone can be so afraid...

not at all.

why do you HAVE to want to have full sex with someone to be happy to be with them?

we have no fear around other people, we just find sex with each other very satisfying and dont feel the need to add to it."
You don't know you have fear of full swap until you try it and I can tell you from experience. When we first full swapped it made me so unbelievably jealous and I never knew I was going to feel that way, it was later the thought of seeing her with someone turned from jealousy to excitement and I wanted to do it again. When you put yourself smack in the middle of that situation then come back and lets talk, till then you're none the wiser.

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex


"Can someone define soft swapping for me please?"

Soft swap = everything bar full intercourse with other other people (ie, intercourse only with one's partner).

I know couples that only participate in softswap for a host of reasons' but listing examples might come across as a dig at them, which is not what its intended.

Rather for me I'll just say I don't soft swap as to me its like licking the cone of a flake 99, but not being allowed to eat the ice cream. Too much of a tease!

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"You don't know you have fear of full swap until you try it and I can tell you from experience. When we first full swapped it made me so unbelievably jealous and I never knew I was going to feel that way, it was later the thought of seeing her with someone turned from jealousy to excitement and I wanted to do it again. When you put yourself smack in the middle of that situation then come back and lets talk, till then you're none the wiser."

its funny, that has been said to us in the past and is still no more true now than it was then.

you have no insight into us or our relationship yet you deem to say we would be happy if we went further. let me say again WE HAVE NO INTEREST IN HAVING FULL SEX WITH ANYONE ELSE. either of us. the opportunity has arisen and has been turned down, on both sides, both myself and the OH. you like shagging others, thats fine.

we dont, that is also fine.

live and let live.

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"Can someone define soft swapping for me please?"

soft swap is everything from watching up to, and stopping before before, full intercourse.

full swap is all encompassing

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth


"You don't know you have fear of full swap until you try it and I can tell you from experience. When we first full swapped it made me so unbelievably jealous and I never knew I was going to feel that way, it was later the thought of seeing her with someone turned from jealousy to excitement and I wanted to do it again. When you put yourself smack in the middle of that situation then come back and lets talk, till then you're none the wiser.

its funny, that has been said to us in the past and is still no more true now than it was then.

you have no insight into us or our relationship yet you deem to say we would be happy if we went further. let me say again WE HAVE NO INTEREST IN HAVING FULL SEX WITH ANYONE ELSE. either of us. the opportunity has arisen and has been turned down, on both sides, both myself and the OH. you like shagging others, thats fine.

we dont, that is also fine.

live and let live."
Fair is fair but I still maintain that there has to be an element of rocking the boat or perhaps the unknown for not wanting to go further.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Done both, and had great fun with full and soft

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Like the other thread with the opposite question, I find it hard to believe that people seem to sneer at what other people are doing and " assume " the reasons why they do things their way.

What turns one person/ couple on won't always turn on the next person/couple....so whatever works for us is good for us

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"Fair is fair but I still maintain that there has to be an element of rocking the boat or perhaps the unknown for not wanting to go further."

nope, not at all.

we have met a couple and it was stated we were only a soft play couple, yet when we started playing it was put to me (male) that if i wanted to, i could have sex with the other female (by all 3 other parties it was offered, not just them, and def not just my OH) and i sincerely wasnt interested.

we both love oral sex.

we both love full sex, with each other.

we got into it, initially for fem fem fun, but Em found she likes cock just way too much to limit herself to women, yet has no desire to sit on another cock.

i really dont understand how you cannot grasp the concept that people just have no desire to go any further.

i mean, if you had a packet of crisps, does that mean you should eat the entire multipack?

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By *pl- capdagdeCouple
over a year ago

Cap d agde,France


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is"

So do full swap partners have great sex with each other,what makes you asume that because you have great sex with each other you doubt you could have better with another person ?

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons.

It's odd that you say that you aren't judging people because all of the reasons that you list seem to be fairly judgemental.

How about for no other reason than that;s what they want and enjoy? "

Not just me then!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

personally i've gotta say if we were all the same it would be pretty boring

everyone has their own preferences and ways of playing, some people soft swap, some people full swap. Some people only look for fem on fem.

At the end of the day we're all here for our own enjoyment and if people dont like it then they dont have to meet .. simple

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is

So do full swap partners have great sex with each other,what makes you asume that because you have great sex with each other you doubt you could have better with another person ?"

never said people that full swap dont have great sex with each other.

never said we definitely couldnt have better with other people.

but, when you KNOW you have good sex, why would you go out and look for better when you know you can have great at home?

look, im not saying either party is right or wrong.

infact, we hav enever lambasted anyone for wanting to go further than we are happy to.

seems that full swap couples are a hell of a lot more critical about those of us that DONT go further, than soft swap are about those that do.

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

firstly ill say i have zero interest in soft swing. for me it would be like having to hold back . however , everyone has there bounderies and what they are happy with and aslong as you are getting the satifaction you want weather it be from phone sex ,cam play ,clubs ,bondage ,water sports ect ect then what on earth is the issue lol !!! i can not for the life of me see why people feel need to bother about the way others swing . as for the commemnt well if you dont try youll not know .maybe soft swing IS as far as that cpl wish to push their bounderies . id no sooner pronounce on thread "everyone should try anal,scat or water sports .if somethings of no interest to you then its of no interest .others maywell rave from the roof tops about about it ,but what drive me crazy in bed will be poles apart from someone else . vie la differance i say !

as for ops post i must say your "question" does come across more negative than curious . id think people who soft swing do so as its what they are comfortable with ,what they get satifastion and their enjoyment from . just the same as i get my thrill and enjoyment from bondage and s and m thats my bounderies and sexual high.

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By *pl- capdagdeCouple
over a year ago

Cap d agde,France


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is

So do full swap partners have great sex with each other,what makes you asume that because you have great sex with each other you doubt you could have better with another person ?

never said people that full swap dont have great sex with each other.

never said we definitely couldnt have better with other people.

but, when you KNOW you have good sex, why would you go out and look for better when you know you can have great at home?

look, im not saying either party is right or wrong.

infact, we hav enever lambasted anyone for wanting to go further than we are happy to.

seems that full swap couples are a hell of a lot more critical about those of us that DONT go further, than soft swap are about those that do."

If you have such great sex at home why swing at all soft or full ? Its also about new experiences and along the way maybe enjoying something with somebody else that you have never experienced with your partner..We all think our partners are the best and why wouldn't we thats why we are with them after all..

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By *oxycouple28Couple
over a year ago

bexley

Having read all the posts, we agree with _ovedupstill... live and let live to be honest.

We are primarily a soft swap couple, we have full swapped with a few couples but to be honest we find we have just as much fun if not more by soft swapping. The two of us having amazing sex together and have just found we have more fun that way as a rule...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well, i think you know why we do,,,due to our other post,,,,lol but it is genuinely interesting what makes other people tick here. what has got people to this stage in there lives and relationships. lets face it, its not a subject that can be brought up in all relationships. purely for us, we are here just for mrs cam wanting to pop her bi cherry and me being me was well up for that. our first few meets where purely that and then the more we spoke we agreed on soft, everything but no fucking others or kissing,,,,girls kiss of course,,,lol we have moved the goal posts from time to time,,,like me, a straight guy sucking cock, was only fair as mrs cam wanted to see this. will we ever do full, no....we wanna save a little personal for us and only us,,,,so the answer is because we are selfish and wont share all our sweets,,,,,.lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think the problem with asking someone to define soft or full swap is if u don't want to do either then u close your mind to it its like most things u maybe able to admit someone has a good point but changes someone mind on one way or another is impossible makes for a good debate though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons.

It's odd that you say that you aren't judging people because all of the reasons that you list seem to be fairly judgemental.

How about for no other reason than that;s what they want and enjoy? "
see, this is where it gets ropey,,,,one person asking a question and pointing out thier opinions in a thread does not make them judgemental,,,,,,the op is just writing down what they think people will understand and what they may feel encourage people to reply,,,,my opinion,,,lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"after the other thread about full swapping, I genuinely would like to know the thoughts of soft swing only. Firstly if we may make our stance on the subject then let others tell us their thoughts.

We are not judging people and neither can we speak for others, however we full swap because we feel soft swap is more of an exhibitionist act than a swinging act.

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons.

It's odd that you say that you aren't judging people because all of the reasons that you list seem to be fairly judgemental.

How about for no other reason than that;s what they want and enjoy? see, this is where it gets ropey,,,,one person asking a question and pointing out thier opinions in a thread does not make them judgemental,,,,,,the op is just writing down what they think people will understand and what they may feel encourage people to reply,,,,my opinion,,,lol"
that was in response to someone saying it seems you are being judgemental,,,lol oops

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we started going to clubs we only played with each other. We had sex with each other in public rooms. It was the exhibitionist factor that was the pull for us. It still is to a large degree.

We thenm did soft swap for a long time. We weren't afraid to full swap, we weren't jealous about the other having full sex. Oral sex with others was enough for us.

We have full swapped, mainly to be honest we indulge in MMF but we have played with couples. For us swinging is about experiencing different things which the two of us cannot achieve together. We enjoyed an orgy type scenario, all playing together in a heap rather than pairing off for one on ones.

we have great sex together and therefore we are not looking for one on one sex with others necessarily, but we like experiencing new and naughty things like having two guys or my OH having 2 women.

At every meet and every time we go to a club we always have sex with each other. Some people have said 'why do you play together when you can do that anytime'. The answer is the exhibitionism and the having sex in public or indulging in decadence.

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth


"Having read all the posts, we agree with _ovedupstill... live and let live to be honest.

We are primarily a soft swap couple, we have full swapped with a few couples but to be honest we find we have just as much fun if not more by soft swapping. The two of us having amazing sex together and have just found we have more fun that way as a rule..."
Difference is you tried and tested the other side because it's only natural for you to want to know, you realised you prefer soft... All good if you ask me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And because we have full swapped, does not mean we don't indulge in just soft swap play, as we still stick to only this at times too

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West


"

Is it that you cannot bare anyone else to have intercourse with your partner?

Is it that you feel the other party may be better in bed than you and your partner will get "too comfy" and possible leave you?

Or is it that you lack confidence enough to pleasure a 3rd party!

For all you soft swingers out there we would love to hear your reasons."

Its a bit of a mixed bag of reasons for us really..

Bit to address the possible reasons above first..

Someone else having intercourse with our partners...wouldn't be a problem if things were different (see below)

Someone else being better in bed and the risk of your partner leaving you...no it wouldn't be an issue..we have been together for nearly 25 years..If either of us was going to go we would have gone by now and not because either of us met someone better in bed

Confidence, definately..male lacks it in the looks dept..(but not ugly apparently) female (gorgeous looking(lacks it in size dept..

Neither of us would understand why another couple would fancy us..and if we thought that a couple gave us the nod purely because the fem was the type who just enjoyed cock and the male was just being 'nice'...we would feel deeply insulted.

But the main reason is that neither of us want to expose ourselves to the possibility of getting a dose (or much worse) the thought of having to take various level of protection in case the other parties are infected outweighs the fun/naughtiness factor too much..

We would both love to be carefree swingers, you all seem such a happy bunch..(and this thread has reinforced the non judgmental nature of most swingers) we feel rotten being stuck on the peripheral of 'the scene' but the odds are stacked against us somewhat.

Some of the comments on this thread are quite heartening though...especially as we have had some shit over our stance in the past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"we soft play ecause niether of us have any interest in having full sex with anyone else.

we both have great intercourse with each other, and therefore doubt anyone else would make it any better.

however, we both enjoy oral sex also, so are more than happy o do it with others.

probably doesnt sound sensible to others, but its our thing and we are happy with is"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"firstly ill say i have zero interest in soft swing. for me it would be like having to hold back . however , everyone has there bounderies and what they are happy with and aslong as you are getting the satifaction you want weather it be from phone sex ,cam play ,clubs ,bondage ,water sports ect ect then what on earth is the issue lol !!! i can not for the life of me see why people feel need to bother about the way others swing . as for the commemnt well if you dont try youll not know .maybe soft swing IS as far as that cpl wish to push their bounderies . id no sooner pronounce on thread "everyone should try anal,scat or water sports .if somethings of no interest to you then its of no interest .others maywell rave from the roof tops about about it ,but what drive me crazy in bed will be poles apart from someone else . vie la differance i say !

as for ops post i must say your "question" does come across more negative than curious . id think people who soft swing do so as its what they are comfortable with ,what they get satifastion and their enjoyment from . just the same as i get my thrill and enjoyment from bondage and s and m thats my bounderies and sexual high.

"

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire

also, on the instance of 'trying and deciding' once you try it, you cant untry it, so IF there were confidence/trust/experience/technique issues with one, or the other, of the couple, then is there really a point in taking the risk when you find a place you are happy to be?

em sucking cock turns me on as much as my licking another woman out does her.

i have no interest in watching her having sex with someone else, as she doesnt me.

she LOVES having a cock in her mouth/hand but doesnt want to have se with anyone.

in fact, can say quite catagorically, that she has been repulsed at being at parties and seeing men be with multiple partners, and not changing condoms.

this is another reason...

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By *weetcorruptionCouple
over a year ago

At home

Surely such an openminded site such as Fabswingers and its community can understand that different people have different kinks.

Fab is not like a swinging site but more an adult site,after all not everyone on here is swinging,we are all here for different sexual kicks.

For me (S) personally,I have found that I love to watch my partner tease and play with another woman,yet know once it comes to full intercourse thats for me.

We are voyeurs and love to watch and be watched and who knows our sexual kinks may change in the future and we may full swap but who is to judge us or our reasons until that happens.

We do not judge anyone's reasons for why they are here,we'e all different and thats what makes the site so interesting.

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By *weetcorruptionCouple
over a year ago

At home


"When we started going to clubs we only played with each other. We had sex with each other in public rooms. It was the exhibitionist factor that was the pull for us. It still is to a large degree.

We thenm did soft swap for a long time. We weren't afraid to full swap, we weren't jealous about the other having full sex. Oral sex with others was enough for us.

We have full swapped, mainly to be honest we indulge in MMF but we have played with couples. For us swinging is about experiencing different things which the two of us cannot achieve together. We enjoyed an orgy type scenario, all playing together in a heap rather than pairing off for one on ones.

we have great sex together and therefore we are not looking for one on one sex with others necessarily, but we like experiencing new and naughty things like having two guys or my OH having 2 women.

At every meet and every time we go to a club we always have sex with each other. Some people have said 'why do you play together when you can do that anytime'. The answer is the exhibitionism and the having sex in public or indulging in decadence.

"

totally agree with everything you have said

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By *enguincoupleCouple
over a year ago

littlehampton

We agree with the soft swap thing. Less is more seems the best way of putting it!

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By *amslam1000Man
over a year ago

willenhall


"Can someone define soft swapping for me please?

Soft swap = everything bar full intercourse with other other people (ie, intercourse only with one's partner).

I know couples that only participate in softswap for a host of reasons' but listing examples might come across as a dig at them, which is not what its intended.

Rather for me I'll just say I don't soft swap as to me its like licking the cone of a flake 99, but not being allowed to eat the ice cream. Too much of a tease!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we state before we play with anyone that we only soft swing .The reason for this is I am diabetic and occasionally can suffer from erectyl disfunction

( talk about being in the wrong line of fun ) This prevents any embarassment for me or dissapointment for anyone else . We have full swapped once when the couple were very understsnding and Suz is free to full swap as she wants ,but prefers to do things as a couple only .So to surmise we soft swing but not by choice .

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By *uboCouple
over a year ago

East kilbride

We mainly soft swap for one reason only.

Being a Bi Fem, my interest is in the other female. i don't want just a FF as i wish my partner to enjoy the fun too.

To that end, it is easier to find another couple with a Bi fem than it is to find the ellusive single fem to make up the 3 some. Not all guys in that situation just want to watch their partner, so it suits us to interact in a soft swap situation........ simples

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By *andACouple
over a year ago

glasgow

We only soft swap as it's what we enjoy.

It's really that simple.

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"

in fact, can say quite catagorically, that she has been repulsed at being at parties and seeing men be with multiple partners, and not changing condoms.

this is another reason..."

I'd be repulsed at that also, and if a guy came anywhere near me with a used condom on his dick I'd be wearing his testicles for earrings fairly quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're a soft play couple cos that what we do..........simples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a really interesting thread and seems very well balanced .

We have enjoyed full and soft swap , and now primarily enjoy mmf or ffm fun , but I (male) rarely full swap as I far prefer to watch her getting fucked and snogging other men or women - the more passionate the better and to take this away would destroy the very essence of my pleasure !

She was a little surprised at this cuckold stance to begin with , but now loves the uninhibited sex she has with others as she realises how much I love to watch . If I am put in a position if joining in with other women , I find it less pleasurable than watching so I guess we are half soft swing lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My OH alsop doesn't full swap that often. He enjoys watching me. The excitement for him is watching and getting pleasure out of other men wanting me, but knowing that I am his and he can claim me at any time he wants, and he does.

I enjoy an orgy type scenario, in a room where loads of people are writhing around in ecstasy. I enjoy the noises etc. I never full swap in an orgy situation. I just don't want to, am happy with just oral. I don't want sex with lots of men one after another. It isn't my thing but receiving oral from a few guys is.

I wouldn't have penetrative sex in a darkroom.

I've been to parties where there we're only two ladies and about 8 men. I only had sex with my partner. The other lady wanted sex with the other guys. I didn't feel any pressure to do something I didn't want to.

That's the thing really, it doesn't matter how others may disagree and say soft swap isn't enough. So what, its not their bodies or their choices is it. Only do what you are happy with and never to please others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I prefer full swop love it! But would not say no to anyone that just wants soft. Everyones different and everyone needs to be respected in what ever they want to do. I don't see why they should have confidence issues maybe they do but if soft swap is what they want then fair play to them.

I don't find any meet boring if its soft or full its how u make the night. I like the social side to swinging having fun (oral) is a bonus having full on is great! But I certainly wouldn't try and change anyones minds as I would know what they want and don't want before I go there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are a bit of both. In a reversal of some previous posts, with us its the Mrs who mainly soft swings and gets pleasure from watching Mr tarts with other ladies. The reasons for this are Mrs tarts is a voyeur and Mr tarts is an exhibitionist, Mrs t is very bi, and plays with ladies usually. Also Mrs is very fussy when it comes to playing with guys, and won't play if she doesn't fancy them.

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By *pl- capdagdeCouple
over a year ago

Cap d agde,France


"

in fact, can say quite catagorically, that she has been repulsed at being at parties and seeing men be with multiple partners, and not changing condoms.

this is another reason...

I'd be repulsed at that also, and if a guy came anywhere near me with a used condom on his dick I'd be wearing his testicles for earrings fairly quickly

"

Have to say we've been swinging along time now,we've never experienced this anywhere..

Not saying it doesn't happen,but if it does must be extremely rare to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally dont like anyone saying they would have the best sex with each other so there is no point in having it with anyone else.

it's like any claim or statement I see on profiles, I hate seeing it from single guys boasting about their massive cocks n stamina, I hate single women saying they are the best at giving anything...and lastly, I hate the sound of a couple that also use the same terms.

I would rather people were honest and (getting back to th point) and say they have problems having full intercourse with others.Having been a couple (not a fuckbuddy) I understood the dynamics of being in a relationship while swinging..my partner wasnt comfy with me fucking someone else...which I accepted (of course I told her about not being happy with double standards)

Unfortunately I've also seen some couples who cant seem to behave themselves when it comes to pre-sex meets,during sex meets, and after the sex meets.*they can be found in parties having blatant arguments.

anyway respecting the softswing choice, however I think any sexual play is an intimate thing..I don't see penetrative sex any different from the whole experience of being with someone who isn't ur partner or someones wife/gf

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

When we started swinging we went clubbing every month, and for the first few visits soft-swung until Rose was ready for her first full swap. For some people like us it's obviously part of the process.

We have some friends who soft-swing only, and while we prefer full sex with our swinging partners, we all have a LOT of fun when we get together! They're certainly not in any way inhibited, just want to keep the ultimate as their own special thing together. All group-sex is fun whatever you do!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm only a soft swinger when it's broken

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

everyones up to doing what they like really,

when i come as a couple we started as soft swing, which didnt last too long, but felt with our first couple meet it would be best if we just played infront of the other couple, and we also swapped for oral but soon progressed to more

but saying people should full swap is like saying someone who only plays with singles should get with couples , everyones got their preferences and limits, and while some might not like to full swap because of jealousy its obviousily not the case with everyone!

its still a very fun thing to do soft swing! x

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By *pl- capdagdeCouple
over a year ago

Cap d agde,France

That is something else we have found alot of lately...where the male half is allowed to play full but the female doesn't...in our eyes its all or nothing if the female doesn't fancy the male half of the other couple then don't play...

Theres no way i'd watch the mrs being shagged while i'm sat there with the wife in question watching,because she doesn't want to..

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World


"firstly ill say i have zero interest in soft swing. for me it would be like having to hold back . however , everyone has there bounderies and what they are happy with and aslong as you are getting the satifaction you want weather it be from phone sex ,cam play ,clubs ,bondage ,water sports ect ect then what on earth is the issue lol !!! i can not for the life of me see why people feel need to bother about the way others swing . as for the commemnt well if you dont try youll not know .maybe soft swing IS as far as that cpl wish to push their bounderies . id no sooner pronounce on thread "everyone should try anal,scat or water sports .if somethings of no interest to you then its of no interest .others maywell rave from the roof tops about about it ,but what drive me crazy in bed will be poles apart from someone else . vie la differance i say !

as for ops post i must say your "question" does come across more negative than curious . id think people who soft swing do so as its what they are comfortable with ,what they get satifastion and their enjoyment from . just the same as i get my thrill and enjoyment from bondage and s and m thats my bounderies and sexual high.

"

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok, abuse in private messages should be reported ....the forum isn't the place to discuss them.

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"Ok, abuse in private messages should be reported ....the forum isn't the place to discuss them."

did, and looks like theyh have been deleted from the site, which shows the system works.

on such an 'openin minded site' i really dont understand why its really isnt just everyone to their own a lot more.

some just seem to want to denegrate others for not having the same limits, or lack there of, as themselves.

imo soft swing isnt limiting oneselves, its merely playing to a different set of rules.

soft swingers may well feel just as liberated doing that as full swingers do. to say its still holding yourselves back and swinging is all about being free is, quite frankly, rediculous.

we all have different limits and expectations from things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We mainly soft swap for one reason only.

Being a Bi Fem, my interest is in the other female. i don't want just a FF as i wish my partner to enjoy the fun too.

To that end, it is easier to find another couple with a Bi fem than it is to find the ellusive single fem to make up the 3 some. Not all guys in that situation just want to watch their partner, so it suits us to interact in a soft swap situation........ simples "

In full agreement with this statement as it reflects what we like in terms of a meet scenario.

Everyone has their own personal likes and dislikes.

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