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Dom/sub or master/slut

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By *r genuine one OP   Man
over a year ago

walsall

Lots of people seem to get these scenarios mixed up but in reality there is quite a bit of difference, so how many fem subs and sluts are out there and what is it that you think makes you different from the other?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom"

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling

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By *r genuine one OP   Man
over a year ago

walsall


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub

around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling "

Totally agree with that a sub/dom is more of a relationship and the dynamics must be there for it to work.

A master/slut involves being ordered about and carrying out tasks etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A domme requests. A mistress orders.

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

Why do you think only sluts have Masters?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling "
totally agree.

Rough sex may be an element of your play together but a Dom/sub relationship is so much more than that

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By *ovestrapMan
over a year ago

London


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling "

So true. Too many so called Dom's think the sub is to use her and nothing else. Being violent and abusive that's not what dom/sub is about. There is more to it then just the sex side of things.

And it's about both parties enjoying them else.

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By *r SxxMan
over a year ago

Kent

Totally!

A sub allows you to be in control, you don't take it, your earn that role, you respect it

Makes it so much better, rewarding and intimate.

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By *r B.Man
over a year ago

Durham

A good dominant knows when to listen, when to take action, and when to step back. This is just as important to you as it is to whoever you are with in the scene, if not more so. The Dominant is the one who has to be in control not only of the scene, but of themself ... at least for the duration of the scene. Your play partner is the one who is trusting you to be a safe person and to create a safe space for them to express their own pleasures, their own pain, their own desires and shadows. They are trusting your sense of control over yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub

around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling

Totally agree with that a sub/dom is more of a relationship and the dynamics must be there for it to work.

A master/slut involves being ordered about and carrying out tasks etc"

Not accurate in our opinion - a submissive can be ordered about and carry out tasks. But those instructions/obedience are based on the sub giving the gift of themselves and their trust to the Dom. And the orders/tasks are NEVER anything that the Sub would find unpleasant/not want to do or damaging either physically or mentally to the Sub.

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By *r genuine one OP   Man
over a year ago

walsall


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub

around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling

Totally agree with that a sub/dom is more of a relationship and the dynamics must be there for it to work.

A master/slut involves being ordered about and carrying out tasks etc

Not accurate in our opinion - a submissive can be ordered about and carry out tasks. But those instructions/obedience are based on the sub giving the gift of themselves and their trust to the Dom. And the orders/tasks are NEVER anything that the Sub would find unpleasant/not want to do or damaging either physically or mentally to the Sub. "

That is why boundaries are discussed and a trust needs to be built up....Its defiantly not about being bullied of feeling unomfortable. Its all about fun and pleasure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/04/20 09:25:10]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom"

100% agree a lot of people can’t comprehend that concept

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling "

There is a massive amount of responsibility on the “Dom” , many don’t realise the comedown and aftercare involved with certain dynamics

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People confuse sub/Dom with just rough sex

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By *r genuine one OP   Man
over a year ago

walsall

I had an amazing relationship for just over 2 yrs with a married lady who's hubby approved....she enjoyed me being in control and would ask me for tasks. As a treat i would take her to an adult cinema and let her do as she pleased...Wow she was naughty

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Standards. Morals and kink level.

Subs have the control

More control than a dom

This - submission is a gift given to the Dom to be cherished , protected and never abused. Too many “Doms” don’t understand that. They don’t realise that the dynamic is very cerebral - they think it’s just about ordering the sub around and the physical side - that’s not a Dom/Sub relationship (and relationship is the key word!) , it’s being controlling totally agree.

Rough sex may be an element of your play together but a Dom/sub relationship is so much more than that"

Dominant sex doesn’t even have be rough. I love being sexually dominant with someone I don’t know that well, and there’s that interesting dynamic of sensual dominance, advancing, eye contact and other subtle communications where you’re investigating and building trust

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By *r genuine one OP   Man
over a year ago

walsall

Love it when it all comes together and the lady is obviously enjoying the tasks you have set them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kink...its all about kink...that's what makes the difference between swingers and kinksters.

If that ops question?

Subs/sluts seek Masters or Doms or Mistresses and vice versa.

Because we enjoy extending the play beyond sexual penetration.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People confuse sub/Dom with just rough sex "

They do. The amount of “subs” I’ve seen asking for a Dom/Domme and making a big thing out of wanting to be humiliated or rough play. That’s fine, it’s what they want, but sadly it makes people not into the scene think that’s what it’s all about. It’s not. It’s so much more than that.

For me personally, it’s more about a meeting of minds. I never felt a need to be a sub, I was always more dominant, in fact I was a Domme in my relationship with my ex bf for over two years. I never hurt him physically or demanded rough sex, as that was never what it was about. There was a lot of age play involved, but I drew the line at the mummy stuff as that’s a kink I’m not into. It was more about me being in control of him and fulfilling his needs. We spoke and met up for months before sleeping together, and built up that trust. Our first date was a private session in a dungeon, haha x

The amount of time’s I’ve been asked to be a findom is insane! Always said no, as again not for me.

What I find interesting is the amount of people who actively seek a Domme. Just yesterday I had a message on my insta asking if I wanted a slave. Err, no, haha, as there has to be a build up of trust where I’m concerned. Don’t just ask me to own you!

I’m submissive to Inked as I choose to be, there was just something about him that tapped into that side of me. However, I don’t think I could be with anyone else, and have told a number of people I’m not interested, as I have no need to be a sub. It’s not naturally within me to give over that much control to someone else. It’s not a mindset that I have. It’s the man, not the role, and I think it’s why we work, as we both know what the other likes, and where there is something I’m not that fussed about, he doesn’t demand I do it, as he’s not about breaking me down until there’s nothing left of me but submission, as that’s just abuse and any Dom/Domme who abuses that trust is simply a control freak and narcissistic in my opinion.

But, as with anything, it’s all subjective and personal to that person. What works for some doesn’t work for others, but as long as there’s trust and respect it’s all good.

Sorry for waffling x Viv x

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By *azzle36Woman
over a year ago

Lancaster

I'm fairly new to all this but have always been submissive in sex, I like a guy to be dominant and take control but only after trust has been built up, too many guys do think that being dominant is about ordering a sub around from the off but I've found with experiencing things on fab that I prefer there to be some form of intimacy whilst being dominated, like kissing and touching and teasing not just strip off tie up and abuse, has no sexual gratification for me. Also some guys calling themselves daddy doms have no idea what that involves and I've had experience of that too in a bad way, to be a daddy dom you must care for protect and look after your sub slave or little girl in the right way, listen to her earn her trust and always stop when she says so dont abuse her first your pleasure and then leave her alone or discard her like a toy that's not being a good daddy... I am not submissive outside of sex and getting messages telling me to do stuff off the cuff when you've not introduced yourself to me or learnt that trust is not what in my mind being a dominant or a daddy dom is about. But then again every sub is different and they look for different things in a dom/daddy/master. Each to their own but research is the key and having had a very bad experience I learnt the hard way to not be naive and to research what I actually wanted first that way you can ask the right questions when you get messaged by a guy claiming to be a dominant and then work out if he knows what hes talking about or is what you want..

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By *AFBODMan
over a year ago

Woodhall Spa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People confuse sub/Dom with just rough sex

They do. The amount of “subs” I’ve seen asking for a Dom/Domme and making a big thing out of wanting to be humiliated or rough play. That’s fine, it’s what they want, but sadly it makes people not into the scene think that’s what it’s all about. It’s not. It’s so much more than that.

For me personally, it’s more about a meeting of minds. I never felt a need to be a sub, I was always more dominant, in fact I was a Domme in my relationship with my ex bf for over two years. I never hurt him physically or demanded rough sex, as that was never what it was about. There was a lot of age play involved, but I drew the line at the mummy stuff as that’s a kink I’m not into. It was more about me being in control of him and fulfilling his needs. We spoke and met up for months before sleeping together, and built up that trust. Our first date was a private session in a dungeon, haha x

The amount of time’s I’ve been asked to be a findom is insane! Always said no, as again not for me.

What I find interesting is the amount of people who actively seek a Domme. Just yesterday I had a message on my insta asking if I wanted a slave. Err, no, haha, as there has to be a build up of trust where I’m concerned. Don’t just ask me to own you!

I’m submissive to Inked as I choose to be, there was just something about him that tapped into that side of me. However, I don’t think I could be with anyone else, and have told a number of people I’m not interested, as I have no need to be a sub. It’s not naturally within me to give over that much control to someone else. It’s not a mindset that I have. It’s the man, not the role, and I think it’s why we work, as we both know what the other likes, and where there is something I’m not that fussed about, he doesn’t demand I do it, as he’s not about breaking me down until there’s nothing left of me but submission, as that’s just abuse and any Dom/Domme who abuses that trust is simply a control freak and narcissistic in my opinion.

But, as with anything, it’s all subjective and personal to that person. What works for some doesn’t work for others, but as long as there’s trust and respect it’s all good.

Sorry for waffling x Viv x"

I would say we share the same opinions , not saying anyone else is wrong as it’s all subjective , thank you for sharing that with us x

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By *aimeSmithTV/TS
over a year ago

Cliss


"A domme requests. A mistress orders."

Yes totally agree xx

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