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Transitioning; my take on the system.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The waiting lists at the sparse few gender clinics around the country are so long.

I may be wrong but it seems to me they have a list of people they are actively working with and a list of people waiting to start their process.

When they refer someone for surgery you exit their list and they start to process someone else from the waiting list.

I figure some people go to the gic looking for advice, guidance, support. Hoping they will “make them a woman” (or a man, if they are f2m.) they turn up having made next to no effort to transition.

What they may not do before they go to the gic, is make good use of the waiting time. Come out fully. Change their name. Grow their hair, or cut it off if they are f2m. Start living as their true gender. If they did they would then be referred for surgery sooner as they are ready sooner.

I see the gic as somewhere you can get hormones, access funds for hair removal and ultimately, referral for surgery. Sure, they do counselling, but that will also give them chance to assess you and decide if your ‘ready’ and they takes some persuading as it’s such a big step.

My experience is that I’ve known all my life that I wasn’t like all the other boys and then men. I knew I should have been female. That is simply not enough to make me ‘ready’ for surgery.

I spent 42 years trying to fit in as a guy. I was crap at it but it was what I was used to. Now, I’m still getting used to being female. I’ll still have traits of man in me. Probably always will. But transition is multifaceted.

What I mean by that is you transition in many different aspects.

You transition socially. Come out.

People around you get used to it over time and that’s a transition in itself.

You learn how to transform your appearance. And get better at it over time.

When you start hormones, everything changes. The way you feel. Your skin. Your shape. Everything.

M2f; Grow your hair. Now!!! Who wants to wear a wig everyday? Also, you know how it transforms you when you put it on. The way you’re seen. The way you see yourself. Taking it off is horrid and then you look in the mirror !!!

The picture of me with a pink towel on my head is me with no makeup and no photo tweaks. I simply didn’t look like that two years ago. Laser on my face and hormones and changed me so much. Add in my hair and I hardly need makeup. I’m 50 so tbh, I shouldn’t be made up as if I’m on a night out all the time. Not if I want to fit in as me.

So you get confident in yourself. People get used to seeing you. Even in the supermarket, you’re familiar so people look less.

Then things start to change in your head. It’s less about being trans and more about ordinary life.

I had a boyfriend for quite a while and he didn’t want me to keep making everything about being trans. Our first night was passionate. The next morning he was between my legs, aroused and wanting me. I wanted him too but, I tend to need the loo in the mornings. So I just had to give him oral sex. So frustrating. I wanted to pull him in through where my thing is.

I knew then I needed surgery to happen for me to enjoy a relationship properly.

Seven months of having a very well hung man with a high sex drive also made me realise I needed the right bits down there!!

I knew I was nearly ready. Now I’m booking surgery I’m reassessing if this is really what I want for me. I went through my evidence of living as a woman. Found old paperwork with mr on it and it felt so wrong. I couldn’t do that again now. I’m ready.

Pay slips, bank cards, bills, all these things show you live as you.

I’m lucky; I’m going to sell my house post divorce and use some of the money to fund my own surgery. I earned enough before to pay for laser and hormones.

If you’re waiting for the nhs; use the wait time to do what you can to get ready.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x"

Thanks. I’m expecting some possibly extreme opposite views but my experience of the system leads me to see it this way.

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

Thank you for the information Rachael.

I think you look great and wishing you the best of luck.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thank you for the information Rachael.

I think you look great and wishing you the best of luck.

"

Thanks honey. I’ve a long way to go. Xxx

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem


"Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x

Thanks. I’m expecting some possibly extreme opposite views but my experience of the system leads me to see it this way. "

The system for awaiting first consult before you even start the process for surgery is way too long. Before you get referred to counsellors and hormones it can be as long as 100 weeks or more!

Support for transition through the nhs is an extremely long wait. But for some they certainly aren't doing themselves any favours by not starting the transition in the lead up to the initial appointment. Youre right key to transitioning is just to start living the life you want to lead be what you want to be than waiting because it's time wasted when they tell you have to wait for any treatment till you've lived 2 years as your gender.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x

Thanks. I’m expecting some possibly extreme opposite views but my experience of the system leads me to see it this way.

The system for awaiting first consult before you even start the process for surgery is way too long. Before you get referred to counsellors and hormones it can be as long as 100 weeks or more!

Support for transition through the nhs is an extremely long wait. But for some they certainly aren't doing themselves any favours by not starting the transition in the lead up to the initial appointment. Youre right key to transitioning is just to start living the life you want to lead be what you want to be than waiting because it's time wasted when they tell you have to wait for any treatment till you've lived 2 years as your gender.

"

Inadvertently, I suspect those who make little progress transitioning while they wait actually lengthen the list. If we all turned up with all the boxes ticked for our first appointment I’m sure the wait time would come down.

Having said that; not everyone knows where to start or feels they can without support.

It takes thick skin and a certain level of selfishness to transition.

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem


"Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x

Thanks. I’m expecting some possibly extreme opposite views but my experience of the system leads me to see it this way.

The system for awaiting first consult before you even start the process for surgery is way too long. Before you get referred to counsellors and hormones it can be as long as 100 weeks or more!

Support for transition through the nhs is an extremely long wait. But for some they certainly aren't doing themselves any favours by not starting the transition in the lead up to the initial appointment. Youre right key to transitioning is just to start living the life you want to lead be what you want to be than waiting because it's time wasted when they tell you have to wait for any treatment till you've lived 2 years as your gender.

Inadvertently, I suspect those who make little progress transitioning while they wait actually lengthen the list. If we all turned up with all the boxes ticked for our first appointment I’m sure the wait time would come down.

Having said that; not everyone knows where to start or feels they can without support.

It takes thick skin and a certain level of selfishness to transition. "

It takes supportive GPs and many I know who have encountered the morally standoffish GPS who refuse to support based on their belief or ideas that go against transitioning. Even when clinics have given the ok for the start of hormones GPs refusing to prescribe them. GPs have come under fire and now complaints taken seriously. But many don't complain that their care has been ignored they just move gp surgery. More needs to be done to stop gps choosing to refuse prescribing hormones or referrals to clinics. They have duty of care their faith or ideals has nothing to do with it. Nhs are doing their best to crack down on transphobia in the system. GPS who say they sent referral letters and haven't but since a lot of clinics don't acknowledge referral has taken place until you receive the letter for your initial consultation it can be a long time waiting to find you haven't been on the waiting list.

If the system can be improved its sorting out shared care and referrals

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Fair play to you a very honest assessment I wish you luck x tiny x

Thanks. I’m expecting some possibly extreme opposite views but my experience of the system leads me to see it this way.

The system for awaiting first consult before you even start the process for surgery is way too long. Before you get referred to counsellors and hormones it can be as long as 100 weeks or more!

Support for transition through the nhs is an extremely long wait. But for some they certainly aren't doing themselves any favours by not starting the transition in the lead up to the initial appointment. Youre right key to transitioning is just to start living the life you want to lead be what you want to be than waiting because it's time wasted when they tell you have to wait for any treatment till you've lived 2 years as your gender.

Inadvertently, I suspect those who make little progress transitioning while they wait actually lengthen the list. If we all turned up with all the boxes ticked for our first appointment I’m sure the wait time would come down.

Having said that; not everyone knows where to start or feels they can without support.

It takes thick skin and a certain level of selfishness to transition.

It takes supportive GPs and many I know who have encountered the morally standoffish GPS who refuse to support based on their belief or ideas that go against transitioning. Even when clinics have given the ok for the start of hormones GPs refusing to prescribe them. GPs have come under fire and now complaints taken seriously. But many don't complain that their care has been ignored they just move gp surgery. More needs to be done to stop gps choosing to refuse prescribing hormones or referrals to clinics. They have duty of care their faith or ideals has nothing to do with it. Nhs are doing their best to crack down on transphobia in the system. GPS who say they sent referral letters and haven't but since a lot of clinics don't acknowledge referral has taken place until you receive the letter for your initial consultation it can be a long time waiting to find you haven't been on the waiting list.

If the system can be improved its sorting out shared care and referrals"

All very valid points

I can’t imagine the distress being lied to by your own gp, finding after years waiting you’re not even on a list, could cause.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look stunning as well x both tiny and I wish you lots of luck x you have made tiny quite jealous x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You look stunning as well x both tiny and I wish you lots of luck x you have made tiny quite jealous x"

Believe me; being trans isn’t a thing to be jealous of x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn’t mean it to sound offensive but he. Is quite feminised ok it wasn’t meant to be derogatory take care

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I didn’t mean it to sound offensive but he. Is quite feminised ok it wasn’t meant to be derogatory take care"

It’s ok. Wasn’t offended in any way. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He’s to old anyway x

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

Good luck Racheal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for sharing.. I can't imagine the ups and downs you have gone through.

Wish you all the best x

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Hats of to you and the deepest of respect, god you deserve it. Xx

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By *aastyKnixWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker. "

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case."

Oh I certainly agree that transition is a very individual thing. I’ve met people who knew they had an issue but it took them a while to realise they were trans.

This was just ,y take for people, who like me, knew what they were and what they needed.

Life is very good at undermining us. I never imagined this possible. I thought I’d lose everything if I did this...... little by little I have lost so much but I wouldn’t have stopped.

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By *aastyKnixWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case.

Oh I certainly agree that transition is a very individual thing. I’ve met people who knew they had an issue but it took them a while to realise they were trans.

This was just ,y take for people, who like me, knew what they were and what they needed.

Life is very good at undermining us. I never imagined this possible. I thought I’d lose everything if I did this...... little by little I have lost so much but I wouldn’t have stopped. "

Well, you did state that you have had occasion to stop and take stock, reassess where you are and where you are going.

That has to be a good thing,doesn't it? Better than rushing in too quickly?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case.

Oh I certainly agree that transition is a very individual thing. I’ve met people who knew they had an issue but it took them a while to realise they were trans.

This was just ,y take for people, who like me, knew what they were and what they needed.

Life is very good at undermining us. I never imagined this possible. I thought I’d lose everything if I did this...... little by little I have lost so much but I wouldn’t have stopped.

Well, you did state that you have had occasion to stop and take stock, reassess where you are and where you are going.

That has to be a good thing,doesn't it? Better than rushing in too quickly? "

Oh, for sure yes.

I totally agree that you have to spend at least two years living full time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm FTM.

Unfortunately I agree the waiting lists are ridiculously long. For me, the first appointment at my chosen GIC is 3 years, plus another 2-3 years for the second appointment. Thankfully I'm well on my way through the first lot of waiting times. But I disagree that it's because they're being super thorough... It's due to lack of funding that theres a long wait.

I'm also thankful that I'm private for hormones to be able to afford to be who I'm meant to be one step ahead of where I was. Unfortunately I'll never be able to afford surgery privately.

I wish you all the best.

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that?

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By *aastyKnixWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that? "

Not sure what the time frame is but, I'm not sure it's a case of granting or withholding permission either.

For a person to access any form of healthcare via the NHS, it stands to reason that the purse string holders would want to be certain there was a genuine need. Even for a private patient, any doctor or surgeon is going to need similar assurances.

Can you imagine the repercussions on the healthcare profession if they were to proceed hastily only for a patient to later regret the path they've gone down?

'You operated on me but you never checked!!! Now I want millions in compensation'. It doesn't bear thinking about and you can't blame the professionals wishing to protect themselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thank you for this, my partner is on a waiting list to go to a gender clinic as they are transitioning (F to M) it is interesting what you said about growing or cutting hair. I've always had long hair and haven't cut my hair in over two years and I am male. My partner obviously will also be male but has very short hair. Just wondered what you and other folks think about hair being representative of gender? I know typically men have short hair and women longer hair and even though I consider myself Male I could in a very small way relate to what you said about not fitting in and always feeling like a woman and in terms of apperances I can remember that I always wanted to have long hair but my mum hated it and growing up she would force me to have it cut, it causes so many arguments. But why? why did it cause arguments. Back then a few decades ago was it really that big a problem to want to be a man with long hair? this is a bit long sorry x x hope to chat soon xx

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

There can be many issues around transitioning that folk just don't aporeciate such as attitude at the workplace, whether this is supportive, neutral or hostile.

Even a simple thing such as what toilet to use can cause major issues if dealt with correctly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Gosh. Lots of really relevant and interesting points brought up here.

As Naastyknix says; it’s vital healthcare professionals are sure you’ve had time to be sure of what you want.

It seems cruel to make people live as their true gender without help to do so but if it’s really hard to do and you still do it you’ll develop that thicker skin amongst so many other things.

I know I have found the way I feel develop the longer I’ve lived this way. There’s a lot of maleness to undo. Lots of years acting male that will still show.

Covering up a beard shadow. Tucking away my genitals. Finding clothes that suit me and don’t make me look like I’m “dressing as a woman” it’s all a learning curve.

I’m ready for the next step now. I’ve wanted it a long time but now I’m ready.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm FTM.

Unfortunately I agree the waiting lists are ridiculously long. For me, the first appointment at my chosen GIC is 3 years, plus another 2-3 years for the second appointment. Thankfully I'm well on my way through the first lot of waiting times. But I disagree that it's because they're being super thorough... It's due to lack of funding that theres a long wait.

I'm also thankful that I'm private for hormones to be able to afford to be who I'm meant to be one step ahead of where I was. Unfortunately I'll never be able to afford surgery privately.

I wish you all the best. "

I think it’s a mix of lack of funding plus the time needed to transition mentally and physically.

The waiting list is purely down to funding.

There simply aren’t the people there to work with us.

Once we’re being seen though it should never be something rushed. Even if you pay they have to make sure.

For the guys transitioning you’re wearing binders and packers and trying to present as male. I imagine you have similar issues to the m2f where people see your birth assigned gender through all your hard work and then misgender you.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case."
If that is the case (and I'm not persuaded) then the solution is not delays without explanation, or obsessive gatekeeping, but a process built around early referral and counselling, with more resources, more primary care from GSRD trained professionals, and more support.

Mr Icebreaker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A really interesting post. Thank you for sharing and educating

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I have seen some comments on here about unsupportive GPs.

As someone who works in a GP practice I am appalled that this still occurs. I believe what you are saying but it is so wrong.

GPs (however they feel) should be supporting their patients.

They are no longer allowed (legally) to let their own opinions have a bearing on helping their patients.

If anyone on here has come across this then they must put in a complaint regarding their GP as this is not classed as good practice.

Good luck to you all who are struggling to be who you really are and I hope you get all the help you need.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bear with this. This is a long one!

This is just the way I see the transition system and my advice on how to get through it a bit quicker.

Maybe people are not supposed to get through the system quicker. The system has to be thorough after all and ensure that any treatment is the right treatment for each individual case.If that is the case (and I'm not persuaded) then the solution is not delays without explanation, or obsessive gatekeeping, but a process built around early referral and counselling, with more resources, more primary care from GSRD trained professionals, and more support.

Mr Icebreaker"

It would be lovely if trans people were seen by people who cared and understood our situation within the nhs waiting list guidelines.

Lack of funding and lack of healthcare professionals makes this impossible.

It’s not easy to come out as trans or to seek help to transition. I’ve often thought it’d be easier and more acceptable if I’d been gay.

Once you are being seen, I wholeheartedly agree that it shouldn’t be rushed. I knew from a very early age that I wasn’t male and I’ve had some very scary moments in my life because of having the wrong genitals that I won’t go into those here.

I knew I should have a female body but I’ve lived with a male one so long I needed time to be ready for the surgery and they needed time to see I wouldn’t regret my choice.

I thought I was ready years ago but now I can feel the change within my own psyche that tells me I really am ready now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have seen some comments on here about unsupportive GPs.

As someone who works in a GP practice I am appalled that this still occurs. I believe what you are saying but it is so wrong.

GPs (however they feel) should be supporting their patients.

They are no longer allowed (legally) to let their own opinions have a bearing on helping their patients.

If anyone on here has come across this then they must put in a complaint regarding their GP as this is not classed as good practice.

Good luck to you all who are struggling to be who you really are and I hope you get all the help you need. "

Completely agree with this.

I’ve been lucky with my gp. I have heard of others who just change practice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a lot to add as I don't know much about gender transition but can I just say that had you not of posted that I would never of guessed.

What a journey, I hope you can be an inspiration to others and celebrate the person you were, and the person you are.

Stunning lady, beautiful pictures

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not a lot to add as I don't know much about gender transition but can I just say that had you not of posted that I would never of guessed.

What a journey, I hope you can be an inspiration to others and celebrate the person you were, and the person you are.

Stunning lady, beautiful pictures"

Thanks. In the real world I’m pulling back from outing myself. I’m just another woman on the street, or I try to be. Not easy when idiots still use my dead name. I’m moving away this year though.

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By *rufinWoman
over a year ago

notts


"Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that?

Not sure what the time frame is but, I'm not sure it's a case of granting or withholding permission either.

For a person to access any form of healthcare via the NHS, it stands to reason that the purse string holders would want to be certain there was a genuine need. Even for a private patient, any doctor or surgeon is going to need similar assurances.

Can you imagine the repercussions on the healthcare profession if they were to proceed hastily only for a patient to later regret the path they've gone down?

'You operated on me but you never checked!!! Now I want millions in compensation'. It doesn't bear thinking about and you can't blame the professionals wishing to protect themselves. "

It's already starting to happen, just the tip of the iceberg in my opinion ..

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/01/22/former-transgender-patient-tells-court-sex-change-clinic-putting/

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that?

Not sure what the time frame is but, I'm not sure it's a case of granting or withholding permission either.

For a person to access any form of healthcare via the NHS, it stands to reason that the purse string holders would want to be certain there was a genuine need. Even for a private patient, any doctor or surgeon is going to need similar assurances.

Can you imagine the repercussions on the healthcare profession if they were to proceed hastily only for a patient to later regret the path they've gone down?

'You operated on me but you never checked!!! Now I want millions in compensation'. It doesn't bear thinking about and you can't blame the professionals wishing to protect themselves.

It's already starting to happen, just the tip of the iceberg in my opinion ..

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/01/22/former-transgender-patient-tells-court-sex-change-clinic-putting/"

It is, however, extremely rare that people regret their transition and/or detransition.

I don’t believe it to be the tip of an iceberg. There are some who would like us to believe ‘lesbians are being treated as trans’ etc but they have their own agendas and, unfortunately, the press love those kind of stories.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley


"Not a lot to add as I don't know much about gender transition but can I just say that had you not of posted that I would never of guessed.

What a journey, I hope you can be an inspiration to others and celebrate the person you were, and the person you are.

Stunning lady, beautiful pictures

Thanks. In the real world I’m pulling back from outing myself. I’m just another woman on the street, or I try to be. Not easy when idiots still use my dead name. I’m moving away this year though. "

What a great post and I think you look fabulous. I have a friend who is about to start their trans journey.

I just wanted to ask, given the issues I’ve had recently just trying to get my daughter’s provisional licence, how easy is it to change your name and get new ID?

I also agree about GPs being unhelpful. I had a GP delay a referral by two weeks for me to see gynae despite it being an urgent situation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not a lot to add as I don't know much about gender transition but can I just say that had you not of posted that I would never of guessed.

What a journey, I hope you can be an inspiration to others and celebrate the person you were, and the person you are.

Stunning lady, beautiful pictures

Thanks. In the real world I’m pulling back from outing myself. I’m just another woman on the street, or I try to be. Not easy when idiots still use my dead name. I’m moving away this year though.

What a great post and I think you look fabulous. I have a friend who is about to start their trans journey.

I just wanted to ask, given the issues I’ve had recently just trying to get my daughter’s provisional licence, how easy is it to change your name and get new ID?

I also agree about GPs being unhelpful. I had a GP delay a referral by two weeks for me to see gynae despite it being an urgent situation."

Changing your name is remarkably easy. You simply use a deed poll service online. Pick which one carefully so it gets an official looking seal on it. I know a chap who changed his name to remove his ex’s name from his double barrelled surname. He’s had issues where it won’t be accepted because it doesn’t look official enough.

Once you have a deed pill you can change your name on your driving license. You’ll need a picture signed to confirm its you too.

I can’t remember if you need a letter from a doctor saying this change of gender is likely to be permeant for the driving license. Pretty sure you do for your passport.

There is a gender within your driver number so that changes too.

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By *aastyKnixWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that?

Not sure what the time frame is but, I'm not sure it's a case of granting or withholding permission either.

For a person to access any form of healthcare via the NHS, it stands to reason that the purse string holders would want to be certain there was a genuine need. Even for a private patient, any doctor or surgeon is going to need similar assurances.

Can you imagine the repercussions on the healthcare profession if they were to proceed hastily only for a patient to later regret the path they've gone down?

'You operated on me but you never checked!!! Now I want millions in compensation'. It doesn't bear thinking about and you can't blame the professionals wishing to protect themselves.

It's already starting to happen, just the tip of the iceberg in my opinion ..

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/01/22/former-transgender-patient-tells-court-sex-change-clinic-putting/"

There are a small number of people who have regretted taking such a huge step and some of them can be quite vocal about it. Firstly,it should be acknowledged that these people are victims who have been let down by a system that failed to help them with their real,underlying issues.

Secondly, the vast majority of trans persons just go about their lives,keeping under the radar,not making a huge fuss and quietly very contented with the way their lives have turned out. You don't hear so much about all the positive outcomes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thank you for posting this, Rachel. So helpful.

Can I ask a possibly naive question? When I was a Social Worker years ago, someone had to live in their "new" identity for 3 years before being allowed hormones. (I might be wrong about that. It may have been 3 years before surgery?)

Anyway, my question is, is that still the case? Initially, it seemed like a good idea to me, in terms of the facet of social identity. However, as I've reflected on that over the years I've grown uneasy with it.

I now wonder if it is like saying,"If you pretend for 3 years to be what you think you are, we will let you become that!"

I'd love to know your thoughts on that?

Not sure what the time frame is but, I'm not sure it's a case of granting or withholding permission either.

For a person to access any form of healthcare via the NHS, it stands to reason that the purse string holders would want to be certain there was a genuine need. Even for a private patient, any doctor or surgeon is going to need similar assurances.

Can you imagine the repercussions on the healthcare profession if they were to proceed hastily only for a patient to later regret the path they've gone down?

'You operated on me but you never checked!!! Now I want millions in compensation'. It doesn't bear thinking about and you can't blame the professionals wishing to protect themselves.

It's already starting to happen, just the tip of the iceberg in my opinion ..

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/01/22/former-transgender-patient-tells-court-sex-change-clinic-putting/

There are a small number of people who have regretted taking such a huge step and some of them can be quite vocal about it. Firstly,it should be acknowledged that these people are victims who have been let down by a system that failed to help them with their real,underlying issues.

Secondly, the vast majority of trans persons just go about their lives,keeping under the radar,not making a huge fuss and quietly very contented with the way their lives have turned out. You don't hear so much about all the positive outcomes. "

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay


"Not a lot to add as I don't know much about gender transition but can I just say that had you not of posted that I would never of guessed.

What a journey, I hope you can be an inspiration to others and celebrate the person you were, and the person you are.

Stunning lady, beautiful pictures

Thanks. In the real world I’m pulling back from outing myself. I’m just another woman on the street, or I try to be. Not easy when idiots still use my dead name. I’m moving away this year though.

What a great post and I think you look fabulous. I have a friend who is about to start their trans journey.

I just wanted to ask, given the issues I’ve had recently just trying to get my daughter’s provisional licence, how easy is it to change your name and get new ID?

I also agree about GPs being unhelpful. I had a GP delay a referral by two weeks for me to see gynae despite it being an urgent situation."

Am not sure when but at sone stage their CHI number (community health index) which is used in Scotland by NHS as identifier would need changed, it's the date of birth followed by 4 digits, one of which denotes gender by beibg even or odd

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