FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swinging Support and Advice

Having to cancel

Jump to newest
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands

We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Don't feel bad, you can cancel for whatever reason you want. If it feels wrong, you shouldn't go through with anything out of guilt

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

Don't feel awful about keeping yourself safe. I wouldn't meet anyone d*unk either.

Also d*unk people can't consent to sex so that's a good enough reason on it's own not to meet them for sex.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"Don't feel bad, you can cancel for whatever reason you want. If it feels wrong, you shouldn't go through with anything out of guilt "

Thanks. I know we did the right thing, it just wasn't a nice situation.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

Why has drink not got an asterisk but d*unk has?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"Don't feel awful about keeping yourself safe. I wouldn't meet anyone d*unk either.

Also d*unk people can't consent to sex so that's a good enough reason on it's own not to meet them for sex."

Ooh hadn't thought of that aspect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"Why has drink not got an asterisk but d*unk has?"

Lol. I thought people put those asterisks in themselves.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

don't feel bad. It's supposed to be fun had by all involved. Being dr'unk before anything has started is not a good look!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

It’s your safety at the end of the day, at no point are you or should feel obliged to have sex etc.

We’d understand at any point if someone decided we weren’t for them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

You did the right thing op

If something feels off,don't do it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire


"Why has drink not got an asterisk but d*unk has?

Lol. I thought people put those asterisks in themselves."

No i didn't, lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

I think you cancelled for the right reasons as consent could well have been an issue if they were d*unk. I would have done the same thing.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

As a single guy I'd 100% walk away from anyone who had been drinking or taken drugs. No telling what might happen and potentially what you could get accused of,so don't blame you one bit. All that being a given its getting to be the norm. having people cancel or ghost at the last minute once arrangements have been made. Does tend to feel like it's seen as acceptable for couples and single females to drop a guy with little or no warning. It's happening so frequently lately that it's become very disillusioning. You shouldn't feel remotely bad about what you did OP.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands

Thanks everyone. I was pretty sure it was the right thing to do, but just needed some reassurance.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

We don’t like meeting d*unk people either. The odd time we have (too late before we’ve realised) it hasn’t gone well. You did the right thing and you shouldn’t feel awful.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *onty1971Man
over a year ago

London St Helier Trier

You did the right thing.

Consent aside how they focus and perform in the moment with you.

Would be no great memory afterwards.

I avoid the pill takers, drinkers etc

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

Before a meeting and a New Years eve party I heard a friend had been dia6 with level two skin cancer. She had already had both thyroid's removed due to that. I felt I had to spend time with her so cancelled a.meeting and a NYE swingers party. I felt the same as you did but in the end you have to do what is best for you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."
. You did the right thing If in doubt stay out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

You had the courtesy to let them know. Some people just don’t do even that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it.

Before a meeting and a New Years eve party I heard a friend had been dia6 with level two skin cancer. She had already had both thyroid's removed due to that. I felt I had to spend time with her so cancelled a.meeting and a NYE swingers party. I felt the same as you did but in the end you have to do what is best for you."

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it.

Before a meeting and a New Years eve party I heard a friend had been dia6 with level two skin cancer. She had already had both thyroid's removed due to that. I felt I had to spend time with her so cancelled a.meeting and a NYE swingers party. I felt the same as you did but in the end you have to do what is best for you."

Noble, decent and 100% correct!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always listen to your gut ! You did the right thing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"You had the courtesy to let them know. Some people just don’t do even that. "

Very true!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *omesticated_VixenWoman
over a year ago

sw London

You do not need to feel bad. We would have done the same and not met someone who had drank too much.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah had that recently, room unfortunately went begging but real life trumps fab life. The positives far outweigh the negatives

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ess n BenCouple
over a year ago

Didcot

Don’t feel bad you did nothing wrong, anyway who wants to meet a d*unk

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Hello OP, sorry to hear your meet didn't turn out the way you intended, but you did the right thing and shouldn't feel bad.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

I cancelled a meet once, after I arrived at the couple’s house, and the (very sexy) wife was so d*unk she could barely keep her eyes open. Not my scene, thanks for your time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"Hello OP, sorry to hear your meet didn't turn out the way you intended, but you did the right thing and shouldn't feel bad."

Hi and thanks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

No need to feel bad, the reason for cancelling was entirely self inflicted (on their part), if anything they should have felt bad after hearing your reasons for cancelling!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *1bttmMan
over a year ago

Shoreditch east London

I think u did the right thing. Like everyone else has said yr safety comes first and yr gut feeling was telling u something.

I also think u were right to do it by txt and not face to face. When people are d*unk and u don't know them u also don't know how they are gonna react. I had someone show up that was drink and they got rather pissed off when I told them it wasn't gonna work. U really don't know how someone reacts to alcohol, some people can just turn in a sec, they could get get abusive and at worst violent....u just don't know.

Good call and be proud of yrself not guilty, it wasn't right for u. Yr decision and judgement call to make, it's simple as that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

It's not your fault, anyone would have done the same.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We recently cancelled a last minute meet and I feel just awful about it. There was a room booked, but on our way to it, the phone calls and texts made it obvious there had been quite a few drinks taken. We don't meet people who have had too many. It just gets too messy and not in the good, fun way. I just feel awful about it."

Don't blame you and don't feel bad about it, it didn't feel right and you had to make a judgement call, we've done it.

Infact we have had to cancel a few times in the past, mostly though family issues, it's life and unfortunately things happen.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *edVelveteen OP   Couple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands


"I think u did the right thing. Like everyone else has said yr safety comes first and yr gut feeling was telling u something.

I also think u were right to do it by txt and not face to face. When people are d*unk and u don't know them u also don't know how they are gonna react. I had someone show up that was drink and they got rather pissed off when I told them it wasn't gonna work. U really don't know how someone reacts to alcohol, some people can just turn in a sec, they could get get abusive and at worst violent....u just don't know.

Good call and be proud of yrself not guilty, it wasn't right for u. Yr decision and judgement call to make, it's simple as that. "

Thanks. We were concerned about how he would react face to face.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top