FabSwingers.com forum: Club fright

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the occassions I've been to club's, which isn't that often. I personally have never had an issue rising to the occasion.

Though have stories from friends that have met single guys and they have had similar problems but not on a 1-2-1 meet.

I just think some guys struggle in the club environment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll let you know tomorrow after my first club meet! I might have it as first group sex it came to me lol

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

I've found that it can happen to the best of guys. I always try not to make a fuss about it.. nerves certainly seem to play a part.. but I'm not a guy. And even I have time that my nerves get the better of me.. but it's less obvious as a lady.

I early on used to worry it was me... but experience has taught me that it isnt usually x

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

I played with a woman recently at a club, my first time with a woman, everything was hard until she sat on me and it all went limp, I think I was a little scared.

I did feel a bit pathetic.

She thought it was funny.

But I do hate when men take viagra, gives me jaw ache xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"
yes stage fright....... erections are based on sexual moments where the mind is turned on by what its about to do to that person but when in a public situation the mind thinks about the people watching rather than the subject matter

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

Old Hill

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"

Had two guys who when playing couldn't get going. Different situations for both (gangbang and 121) and "help" offered

Its not you it's them and the best thing we found was to just move on.

I think sometimes nerves kick in and the harder you both try the more frustrating it becomes. Have had soft guys trying to get in...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most fellas experience stage fright at some point! Many like the idea of playing in a group or an open room with others around, but when it actually comes to it I guess their brain says no which in turn makes their cock limp

Oh and then there is the condom issue, so many men cant maintain once the rubber is on!

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

It’s a lot of pressure to perform and once you’re ready to go, need to make sure you don’t finish too quick !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Playing in a group or ooen room sounds fun and many want to do it but when it comes to it the brain is screaming no which in turns makes some guys unable to get hard. So how is the best way to get round this?

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By *rK MrsJCouple
over a year ago

Kidderminster

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"

Yes sometimes when putting to much pressure on one's self to perform which causes more pressure so it can be a vicious circle sometimes.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

Been to a couple of clubs over the years and never had a problem as always been in a situation where I am comfortable with.

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By *iglittleoneMan
over a year ago

B76 is home

I've been about a dozen times and being honest never had a problem with sexy people.

A different story with not so sexy people!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I've found that it can happen to the best of guys. I always try not to make a fuss about it.. nerves certainly seem to play a part.. but I'm not a guy. And even I have time that my nerves get the better of me.. but it's less obvious as a lady.

I early on used to worry it was me... but experience has taught me that it isnt usually x "

Exactly this.

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I early on used to worry it was me... but experience has taught me that it isnt usually"

It absolutely, definitely isn’t you.

Sometimes, no matter how favourable the conditions, our cocks just refuse to work. It’s frustrating, and we’re conditioned to find it embarrassing, but it’s just a thing that happens. It certainly isn’t anything to be ashamed of.

I’d say it’s certainly more difficult under live-fire conditions in a club. No matter how hot the situation, no matter how attractive the partner or partners, there are external factors that can just cause a sudden wilt.

Room too hot, or too cold? A particularly unappealing hoverman getting that wee bit too close? A completely inappropriate song coming on over the PA? Any one of a hundred little things can cause someone with a penis to lose their focus.

Like anything else though, it does get easier with practice. I never initially identified as an exhibitionist, but I repeatedly found myself playing with partners who are, and I’m starting to rather appreciate having an audience now.

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By *lattyukbiMan
over a year ago

Rugby

I’ve been to clubs before with a planned bukkake session on the menu... it’s not quite as expected when the ladies are having to persuade the men to come forward... not me I hasten to add!

It may be a symptom of pay on the door clubs where Tom, Dick and Harry from the pub pop along on a whim.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"
I'm the luckiest man in the world.

Seriously.I have been around this block, having bought and worn the teeshirt, and I have had some enlightening experiences.

I learned about edge droop as soon as I took up cottaging. Edge Droop is that thing where guys have been around a sexy place, whether it's a cottage or a sex club, for more than a few minutes, giving themselves a helpful tug along the way, and lose the ability to perform when the chance comes to take their hand off their cocks and to let someone else provide the stimulus. they've been edgg, and now they're drooping.

It happens. it's about where they been and what they've been doing, not where they are now or who you are.

In clubs I focus on not aimlessly wanking, and on remembering that god gave me a tongue and fingers because sometimes my cock would not be enough. (this is a joke only an atheist pervert can make...)

Incientally, lasses also get performance anxiety in clubs, not least when, like Ms Icebreaker, they can, when aroused, become beautiful squirty fucksluts instead of just being beautiful. Some guys treat it as a personal slight if they don't then squirt on demand. A tip to those guys - if you want someone who gets wet and slippy on demand, fuck off to an aquarium and throw fish at the seals.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, blokes go floppy. All os us do. Bad ones blame you, Ok ones apologise, good ones improvise. Any guy who says it has never happened to him may have either limited experience or a troubled relationship with the truth.

Mr Icebreaker.

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By *andS33Couple
over a year ago

Yorkshire

We've definitely all been there, we find it happens the most in open rooms with a lot of people and a lot of distractions etc, much less so in a private room with far less people and nobody stood in a doorway chatting about random shite.

(happens far too often on clubs unfortunately).

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the feedback, much appreciated. I am an exhibitionist and like public areas so i guess i just have to suck it up....sometimes literally

lol x

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By *LIRTWITHUSCouple
over a year ago

Chester

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"

I turn men to jelly

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport

"I think most fellas experience stage fright at some point! Many like the idea of playing in a group or an open room with others around, but when it actually comes to it I guess their brain says no which in turn makes their cock limp

Oh and then there is the condom issue, so many men cant maintain once the rubber is on!"

Happens in private hotel meets too.....

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?I'm the luckiest man in the world.

Seriously.I have been around this block, having bought and worn the teeshirt, and I have had some enlightening experiences.

It happens. it's about where they been and what they've been doing, not where they are now or who you are.

In clubs I focus on not aimlessly wanking, and on remembering that god gave me a tongue and fingers because sometimes my cock would not be enough. (this is a joke only an atheist pervert can make...)

Mr Icebreaker."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not one on one. But sometimes first time with new couple or group depending on confidence but generally eventually get into swing of things. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like a few other comments here, I have no problems myself but have certainly witnessed it when attending clubs...

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By *isko91Man
over a year ago

Halifax

My first time to a club will be on Saturday.. I wasn’t worried about this... but now I am!! Haha

Fingers crossed I don’t struggle ????

Will let you know, but good to know it happens to others...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cant get stage fright little fella is all locked up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not had this in a club, but did have a problem on the first 1 on 1 meet I had after we opened up our relationship a couple of years ago and I had a FWB.

The first time I ended up getting naughty with the FWB it was the first time I'd had sex with a different woman in 15 years and I was thinking of how sexy she was, how horny it was, the excitement and anticipation of the scenario but also ended up thinking things like "what if K isn't OK with me being with another woman" and "what if I fail to perform" also "what if she doesn't think I measure up", this overthinking meant that it was difficult to get started and then I slipped off the bed when we went doggy style and it was all suddenly a big flop with not much happening.

The second time I met my FWB I took half a viagra before and everything was great and I managed to perform but then only lasted an utterly embarrassing amount of time

but at least she had some fun toys...

It's very easy for a man when in a new/different scenario to find that suddenly their physical and mental states become unaligned and you get a bit of stage fright and once it happens it just gets worse as you start thinking negative thoughts about the moment and questioning what's happening.

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By *eefdoddusCouple
over a year ago

Scottish Borders

First time it happened to me in a small club I was mortified. We were in a public play room and there were a number of lovely people all having fun, we made our way in amongst the revellers and when we started playing with each other......nothing..! Rather than get all upset we left and found a private space, took a deep breath , relaxed and played as we would at home. Lo and behold problem solved.

Made our way back and didn't have a problem after that. It's happened a couple of times since. Annoying but we can deal with it easily now.

We've had a few chaps have a similar problem when trying to join in with us and never make a thing of it. It happens and it's nothing to do with the lady..!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As others have said can depend on a whole host of factors both external and internal.

Door rattling as others try to get in, pre match nerves, over enthusiasm on one or multiple particpants.

This can happen anytime in my opinion/experience. You just have to be inventive...if Mr Floppy rears, or rather fails to rear,his head then use your imagination, fingers and tongue and maybe he will join the party. If not make sure you do your best and that way there likely be a next time.

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By *ishopstippleMan
over a year ago

Purley

"Reaching out to the guys, have you ever struggled to "perform" in a club but not 1 on 1?

I am finding that guys I meet at clubs struggle to get it up and it made me question if it was me for a while, but I do not have that issue 1 on 1.

Is it club nerves?"

Yes almost every guy gets that problem at sometime or another

As as guy you should not fixate over it, or it can become an inhibiting problem. after all there is always next time

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

Always happens to me (Rob) at least once in a club. If I'm focusing on people around me instead of the task at hand then things can go south

Not a problem any other time.

We have friends who stopped meeting altogether because the male halves kept having this problem.

I've found the trick to dealing with it is just to expect it and switch to oral or touching until things wake up again

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Only time I struggled was with dehydration, clubs are hot, whats not hot about semi naked people, they need to be due to lack of clothes.

Answer, drink lots of water, works for me..

After thought, not to much.

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

It has happened a couple of times in clubs to me, the reason on both occasions was because I was distracted. It sounds silly but something daft like a conversation by watchers about their bloody shopping list is enough, then panic sets in because I couldn't get hard and that is the end of it. Now I tell those having a mundane conversation to fuck off to the bar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My personally experience is I go to the club to fuck and it’s a huge turn on for me to be exposed so that gets me hard. Some women forget that men have to be turned on though too and think a click of the fingers will get us hard. I don’t mean to sound crude and of course she still needs to be ready but it’s a lot easier to open legs and use some spit then it is to get an erection. Kissing gets me hard. So if they not ready just slow it down with a kiss and touch them and slowly wank them.

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